When to Stop Wearing a Bikini

Recent blog posts on my top picks for one-piece and two-piece swimwear raised some interesting questions, one of which was about the age that women should stop wearing bikinis. Well, here’s my point of view.

I am open minded about fashion and style because there is no one way to be stylish. I suggest guidelines that serve as a starting point, and am all for cleverly bending the so called style rules when the results are edgy, arty and flattering. That said, I also believe in age appropriate dressing, which has little to do with not being able to sport the latest trends, and more to do with covering up a certain amount of skin. In other words, after a certain age, I believe it’s best to not wear your clothes too short, too tight and too low. I’m not pinpointing the age because that will differ from person to person.

But when it comes to bikinis, my thought process is different. Regardless of your age and so called body flaws, if wearing a bikini floats your boat – wear it. Swimming in the sea, lying on the beach, sailing on a boat, and soaking up the heat are activities that bring you closer to mother nature. What is more natural than baring your body in a natural environment? To me, showing larger amounts of skin in this type of context is 100% appropriate. Who cares if you don’t look like a super toned fitness instructor in a bikini. Who cares about jiggly bits and cellulite at this point. In natural environments, context overrides body type and age appropriate dressing restrictions. Wear that bikini if you are confident and comfortable doing so. I will applaud your uninhibited spirit.

Now, public pools aren’t quite as natural in setting (most of them are located in urban or suburban environments). The question is, does the same rationale apply? Should you cover up more of your body just because you are older and your body isn’t “bikini fit”? I am torn on this one and could argue either way.

I’d love to hear your viewpoints on the subject. When should you stop wearing a bikini? Are you offended when women who are not bikini fit, or are over a certain age bare their bodies at the sea or poolside? Would you prefer to see them cover up?

A Sunny Spring Gathering in Seattle

Today’s post is written by fabulous forum member and software engineer, Aida, who also happens to be a Seattle local. A bunch of us recently got together for a day of food, fashion, friendship and fun and this is how it went down.

The morning of the Seattle meet-up I was so excited I awoke before my alarm, which rarely happens. It was unexpectedly sunny so I was happy to wear my baggy flared jeans, white button-up shirt, cream vest, and clog sandals. As I drove to Seattle my excitement grew by the minute; I couldn’t wait to meet everyone, as well as shop downtown (with Angie no less!) for the first time. Angie had offered to meet us at Nordstrom. I parked and walked up to the entrance of the flagship store, in awe of its enormous size.

Before going inside, I stopped and peered through the glass doors where I saw three lovely ladies talking and laughing, instantly recognizable: Kari with her unforgettable bright red hair, wearing a printed blouse, denim skirt, and great textured hose; Anna, in striped silk pants, open-toed ankle boots, and the most fabulous bright fuchsia lipstick; and Angie, sporting a denim-on-denim look with a chambray top, jodhpur jeans, and golden heels and handbag. With a big grin I walked inside.  After hellos and outfit admirations, we chatted for a few minutes, took some photos, and then headed outside.

From Nordstrom’s we had a short walk in the wonderful sunshine to Dahlia Lounge, which is decorated in luscious rustic colors and low golden lighting. Shortly after being seated Laurel arrived, wearing all black with a bright blue cardigan, soft green handbag, and combat boots followed by Jenava who was also sporting all black, a long gray cardigan, and cream belt; Sheila (who’d purchased a flowy red floral tunic at Nordstrom Rack before meeting us), in crisp white pants, a striped top, and a bright citron jacket; and Julie, wearing a printed shirt dress, gray moto jacket, and the softest pair of light brown slouchy boots.

Though several of us were meeting for the first time, it was as if we were all old friends. Looking around the table I couldn’t help but smile at the truly fab company surrounding me. Our non-stop conversation showed that not only were these ladies beyond stylish, they were also all sweet, intelligent, and insightful. Topics ranged from food, travel, work, life, and of course, fashion.

Towards the end of our tasty brunch Janet, a reporter from the Seattle Times who’s doing a story on YLF, joined us for shopping wearing a black tunic, leggings, and a deep blue cardigan, and her photographer, Ellen, also joined us. We stepped outside into the sun and a myriad of pretty sunglasses came out to play. Ellen took some fun photos of the lot of us crossing the street Abbey Road style; with eight of us trying to coordinate along with a zillion people being outside for the first truly sunny day of the year in Seattle, we all got a new appreciation for the time Angie spends taking her street photos! It was a lot of fun, and we giggled our way back-and-forth across the street several times.

After the street crossing photos, Ellen “followed” us while we walked to the shops: she ran ahead of the group while we walked, talked, and laughed, constantly taking photos. It must have been quite a sight, a group of eight amazingly stylish ladies, sunglasses on, with a photographer standing, crouching, moving, animatedly snapping pictures. More than a few heads were turned!

Ellen bid us adieu when we arrived at AllSaints Spitalfields, which had several walls of floor to ceiling antique Singer sewing machines. The clothing was mainly black with pops of white, gray, and bright coral, and adornments of all things metal could be found throughout. We saw a VERY short gold sequined skirt we couldn’t help but marvel at its length (or lack thereof), tops with unique cutout backs, more types of combat boots than you’d think exist, and some of the most amazing hardware covered belts. Anna had had her eye on a pair of black Shearling lined boots which she modeled for us before purchasing.

Next we walked to Anthropologie which was loaded with cheerful colors, prints (including many conversational prints), and displays. On the ground floor was a lovely home décor section on the left, clothing on the right, and a huge curved staircase with a landing in the middle for another display, leading to more clothing upstairs and small décor items scattered throughout. Angie gave Kari some tips on how to incorporate the 70s glam look, which many of us also enjoyed hearing.

From there we walked back to Nordstrom, and after strolling through the always impressive shoe department went over to accessories. Julie and Jenava had their eyes on sunglasses, and Anna belts. Julie bought a lovely pair of tortoise shell Ray Bans after getting advice from Angie, and Anna bought a fluorescent yellow-green skinny belt. I also spotted the skinniest belts I’ve ever seen, less than a quarter of an inch across in bright colors.

Next up was H&M, displaying both neutrals and brights. We found items in bright fuchsia, lime, and orange (including bright short shorts!) as well as bright red-orange items. While walking through and wondering how they packed so many items in the store, I happily spied just the white tuxedo blazer I’ve been looking for. A gold pendant on one of the mannequins caught Angie’s eye which she immediately purchased, and then promptly put on. A wonderful lesson in buying things that delight you and wearing them right away!

We ended our shopping trip next door at Mario’s to enjoy some luxury designer eye candy. The store had an ultra vaulted ceiling, with an impressive men’s department downstairs and women’s department upstairs; a massive hourglass-curved stone staircase opened up onto accessories, with clothing racks lining the walls and displays of pretty items in front of them. There were some beautifully draped dresses in midi lengths and Anna purchased a perfectly boxy bright orange silk shirt.

Outside, the sun was still shining and even though half the day had passed, it felt like time had flown by. We said our goodbyes and parted ways. As I drove home I reflected on the awesome day, and how brilliant it was to have the opportunity to be in such inspiring company. Laurel, thanks for putting this all together! And thanks to Angie and Greg for cultivating the wonderful YLF community. I’m pretty sure I can speak for everyone when I say I eagerly look forward to the next get together!

What To Wear on a Date

I haven’t been on a date date in a very long time. So I have no recent first hand experience with dating and date-appropriate outfits. Of course, Greg and I do have date night and in that case I’ll wear something that he especially likes, which means NO ruffles or extra shiny fabrications.

I do have a lot of recent second hand experience with dating outfits though. I have many single clients, at many different stages of life, that request my help with date-appropriate attire. We often end up building “a date wear capsule”, which also includes daywear options because a date can mean a mid morning cup of coffee, an early afternoon stroll, or a ball game.

I suggest to my clients that above all else, they should choose a dating outfit that makes them feel comfortable and confident. For some this means jeans, blouse and boots. For others it means a casual dress, denim jacket or cardigan. Or it can mean a skirt and top, trousers and sweater, jacket and short shorts, or sheath and heels.

Being comfortable also has to do with how you relate to your context. In other words, your outfit should be appropriate for the occasion on the casual/formal scale. You might not be comfortable wearing a cocktail dress when everyone else is in jeans, and vice versa.

So the basics are all about you being relaxed in your outfit: How you feel wearing it and how it fits the occasion. Seems simple enough. But my experience with clients tells me this is easier said than done. There are two deeper questions that almost always come up.

The first question is around the extent to which you are going to reflect your normal fashion persona. Personally, I fall into the “just be yourself” camp. If you are a dramatic, trendy and flamboyant dresser, this should come through in your date wear. If you are a modest, preppy and classic dresser, show off these great looks. Dress romantically if that tickles your fancy. If arty and edgy ensembles are your thing, don’t hide them. It’s best that your date sees the way you normally dress straight off the bat.

Of course, there are also good arguments for playing it safe on date night, tempering your style to avoid preconceived judgements. Perhaps you will stick to neutral colours instead of your normal brights, or forgo the clanking and jiggling jewelry that you normally wear. Maybe you’ll go without your favourite perfume in case your date has allergies. Maybe you’ll wear contact lenses instead of your specs.

The second tricky question concerns the alluring factor. Should you show more skin at date time? Should you wear something form fitting? My advice on this one is, again, to be yourself. If you are a naturally modest dresser, don’t feel the pressure to wear something more tight or revealing. If you feel good showing some more curve and skin, go for it. Keeping in mind the dress code of course.

These are the main questions that I thrash out with my clients. Some want to pull out all the stops and look as alluring and dramatic as possible at date time. Others feel they should reign in their eclectic style and play it safe. There are no right answers that apply universally to all women — ultimately the right thing for you will be the decision that makes you the most comfortable and confident. Then you can relax and have fun.

I would love to hear your point of view on how to dress for a date. Whether you are currently on the dating circuit of not, what are your suggestions for date-appropriate attire?

Roundups

Simpler Items

This week's list of top picks list is about basic pieces.

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Assorted Items

Items for Summer, both in and out of air conditioning.

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Casual Summer Vibes

This week's top picks are good for a casual Summer vibe.

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Summery Earth Tones

These items are for those who like to wear casual earth tones in warm and hot weather.

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Hints of Spring

Some tried-and-tested winning items to refresh your style for Spring.

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Dressier Items

An assortment of dressier top picks might be just what the doctor ordered.

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How to Store Handbags

Oh how I want to weep when I see fabulous handbags stashed away at the bottom of a closet, collecting dust and losing their shape. All I want to do is rescue those little darlings and give them the attention that they deserve!

On a more empathetic note, I do understand that handbags are hard to store because they are bulky and often oddly shaped. Here are some storage ideas that might help.

  • Keep them in easy reach: Out of sight, out of mind.
  • Stuff them with paper: This is not essential, but I stuff my standing handbags to retain their shape. They also look neater and stand upright more easily this way. I fill up knotted plastic bags with paper and use that as stuffing.
  • Bag covers: Pricey handbags often come with a felt or flannel drawstring slip cover. Apart from my Chanel and Valentino handbags, I do not keep handbags in their slip covers unless I’m traveling. Our walk-in wardrobe protects them just fine, and I like to see my handbags each day as I shop my closet. They are my wardrobe pets.
  • Shelving: Handbags are best stored upright on shelves. Use shelf dividers for extra support.
  • Cupboard: If shelving is not an option, try a cupboard or armoire. Pop handbags into see-through boxes for better stacking results.
  • Handbag Cubby: If you have the space, storing handbags in cubbies is a good idea.
  • Drawers and Baskets: Small clutches and handbags for occasion wear can be stored out of sight in a drawer because they don’t come out to play as frequently.
  • Over the door handbag rack: These come in all shapes and sizes, like this one from Home Depot. The Heavenly Handbag Holder is another solution.
  • Hooks: Sometimes you can create an attractive display by hanging bags on hooks in your room or walk-in wardrobe.
  • Coat Rack: Some of my clients hang their handbags on coat racks close to the front door.

I use multiple storage options because I have many, many handbags. Most of them are displayed on open shelves in our very small walk-in wardrobe, but also use an over the door handbag rack and pack away some of my beaded clutches in drawers. I swap out my handbags almost daily and that’s why they have to be on hand and out of their felt bags. Like you, I don’t have much time to get ready in the morning. How do you store your handbags?

Of course, with all those pretty handbags on display, you won’t want to let things down with the aesthetics of the closet itself. On that topic, Maria from ColourMeHappy wrote a wonderful post today on choosing the best colour for your closet.

Hot Picks from the Nordstrom Half Yearly Sale

Nordstrom’s end of Season sale is upon us. This is not to be confused with the Anniversary Sale, which starts on the 15th July. If you’re still after Spring and Summer items to refresh your look, take a peak at my top picks. I’ve seen them all fitted on the bodies of my wonderful clients! Remember to look at all the colour options.

  1. Kate Spade New York ‘Deanna’ Shoulder Bag: Kate Spade does great structured handbags, and this one has a comfortable shoulder strap.
  2. Nordstrom ‘Argyle’ Sheer Control Top Tights: I have these and just doubled up.
  3. Enzo Angiolini ‘Nifties’ Sandal: A basic Gladiator with a super one inch heel. Gold gets my top vote.
  4. Miz Mooz ‘Salima’ T-Strap Sandal: Retro, funky and comfy. I love the minimal toe exposure here.
  5. Winter Kate Tie Neck Chiffon Blouse: Romantic and breezy. Looks great untucked and with a cream camisole.
  6. Fever Open Front Linen Blend Cardigan: Lightweight and really soft, with interesting ruched pocket detailing. Scrunch up the sleeves and layer over a tee. Easy!
  7. Miraclesuit ‘Rosewell’ Tankini: It’s girdling without sucking the life out of your torso and the adjustable straps are handy.
  8. Cole Haan ‘Air Jasmine’ Gladiator Sandal: Buttery soft leather straps and a soft back zip closure make this sandal a win. The name is close to my heart.
  9. 3.1 Phillip Lim Pin Dot Print Shorts: These are as sweet as can be. I almost can’t stand it.
  10. KUT from the Kloth Flap Pocket Capris: A good fit with comfortable rise measurements. They also look fab rolled to the knee.
  11. Kate Spade New York ‘Lacey’ Zip Around Continental Wallet: Beautifully made and virtually functions as a clutch handbag.
  12. James Perse Cotton Chino Pants: Casual and sans cargo pockets. The drawstring isn’t too baggy and there is a zipper closure.
  13. Gallery Trench Coat: A super lightweight short trench coat with detachable hood. Love the red.
  14. Cole Haan Packable Iridescent Coat: This one folds away into a perfect little travel pouch.
  15. Bobeau Tab Sleeve Mixed Knit Cardigan: The softest cardigan ever.
  16. Samuel Dong Ruffle Trim Belted Coat: Dramatic and fabulous. You might make amends with ruffles after seeing this style.
  17. Splendid Woven Front Knit Pullover Shirt: Amazing on tall gals with long torsos.
  18. MARC BY MARC JACOBS ‘Bianca’ Leather Satchel: Semi structured and in the very best colour of the season.
  19. Trouvé Pleated Silk Pants: Perfect coverage on a hot day. Super soft and very airy.
  20. Boutique 9 ‘Jarn’ Flat Boot: Perforated summer boots for those who fancy that idea.
  21. Fever Smocked Hooded Cardigan: Nice for a casual gal on the go.
  22. 7 For All Mankind ‘Roxanne’ Skinny Stretch Jeans: I’ve had these for 4 years and they are still going strong.
  23. Haute Hippie Tie Neck Blouse: ’70s blouses are big and this one is really pretty. The elastication draws in the waist.
  24. BCBG MAXAZRIA Cotton & Silk Tunic: This looks so much better on! I had it on my client yesterday and it was one of my favourite items that she purchased. Breezy, but tailored in all the right places.
  25. B. Makowsky ‘Isabel’ Convertible Leather Satchel: The colours are sublime.
  26. Cole Haan ‘Air Delfina’ Cork & Jute Wedge Sandal: A versatile and comfortable sandal if platforms are your thing.
  27. Halogen Two Button Blazer: Plain and powerful.
  28. Diane von Furstenberg ‘Artemis’ Cuff Sandal: Someone please buy these stunning sandals so that I can live vicariously through you.
  29. Robert Rodriguez Tie Front Shorts: Love them! Flowy, feminine, fashion forward and fun.
  30. Seychelles ‘Amethyst’ Peep Toe Pump: Cute two inch heel with polka dot trim. Fab with faded blue jeans.
  31. Everybody ‘Tempe’ Pump: A sweet Euro shoe with an arty buckle.
  32. Sweet Pea by Stacy Frati Mesh Wrap Tank: A full-ish bust fills out this top amazingly well. It makes you look extra hourglass-y.
  33. Seychelles ‘Squeak’ Sandal: A pretty sandal on the foot. Adore the coral strap.
  34. Seychelles ‘Pot of Gold’ T-Strap Pump: These are surprisingly comfortable and lady-like.
  35. Cole Haan ‘Air Darleen’ Open Toe Wedge: Versatile, pretty and especially good with Summer frocks.
  36. Fidji ‘E629’ Slingback: If I needed another pair of light coloured summer sandals, these would be them. Extremely comfortable.
  37. Kate Spade New York ‘Billie’ Satchel: Simple and chic. Makes for a fab professional look.

There is lots more on sale, but I had to draw the line somewhere. Stock up on warm weather items if summer is your dominant season. Happy Shopping!

NORDSTROM.com - Shop the Half-Yearly Sale for women and kids.

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