When you put yourself on the Internet, you open yourself up to all manner of feedback, some very positive and and some very negative. It is a roller-coaster, but it is expected.

What I didn’t realize is that you can be just as vulnerable by just walking down the street. I learned this a few weeks ago when someone contacted us to say I was “featured” in an article that Alyssa Shapiro wrote for Glamour, “What Your Jeans Say About You (According to Guys!)”. 

The photograph they published was taken a year ago when we were in NYC for Fashion Week. We had actually featured the outfit on YLF the next day, so I’m anything but ashamed of the look. The jodhpur jeans, which I LOVE, were found by hubby Greg when we were in Milan last year. It’s extremely special when Greg picks out an item of clothing for me. As a lover of equestrian style, these jeans were a no-brainer, and they are still one of my favourite wardrobe items. 

The take in Glamour is, shall we say, different. The photo is not flattering at all. Alyssa’s caption is, “Baggy jodhpur-like jeans will make him focus on your rear—but not in a good way”. And “Hans, 27″ says I’m thinking that this is “the last time I leave the house without my butt pads.”

Of course, that stings. And is made worse by the fact that none of the other captions were quite as off color or insulting. Clearly, I was the butt of the joke here! 

Please don’t get me wrong: I don’t take the comment by “Hans, 27” seriously. Alyssa and Glamour’s publisher Conde Nast are only serving up in Glamour what they think we want to see. But what does the article say about us their readers? That we want to dress according to “what guys think”? That we enjoy off color commentary on other women’s outfits? That we are numb to the impact something like this might have on the subject?

I worry about how this sentiment inhibits women from being themselves and experimenting with their style. And most of all, how it takes the fun out of fashion. Although very few people have to suffer public humiliation in a major magazine, most people who go outside the box do at some point experience a thoughtless comment that leaves a bad taste in their mouth, even when the commenter has positive intent. 

Blogging for almost 6 years has thickened my skin considerably and opened my eyes to how subjective style and fashion really are. It has also given me wonderful supportive feedback that makes it easier to brush off an insult. My message to you is this: Don’t be afraid to experiment and explore with your style. Excellence is achieved by stepping outside the box. And never stop having fun with fashion. Hans, Alyssa and Conde Nast are out there, but Hans is irrelevant, Alison is just doing her job, and Conde Nast is motivated by financial gain and a cynical deconstruction of what will make you click a link or open a magazine. Feedback is important, but make sure you’re getting it from someone that matters.

So you can bet your bottom dollar that I will be wearing those jodphur jeans again at Fashion Week this September. For many reasons they make me feel fabulous, and that’s what counts.

Come to think of it, if their yardstick is attracting stereotypical guys, Glamour could have a field day with the rest of my style! With extremely short hair, an often hidden waistline, high necklines, and flat shoes — my style is not exactly what conventional wisdom tells us is alluring to the opposite sex. Good thing I’m not out there any more!

UPDATE (9/1):  A Glamour PR representative contacted me to apologize and to let me know that they had removed the picture. This might be the result of YLF readers reaching out to Glamour in email, so thank you for your support. While I appreciate that Glamour responded, I also know that their action doesn’t help the other women targeted in the same article, or in other articles of this nature. I hope that Glamour joins us in having much more constructive conversations about fashion and style.

I apply Burt’s lip balm before I apply my lipstick because it softens the shade against my pale skin, and it makes my lips feel extra moist. Sometimes I apply lip balm after the application of lipstick to soften the colour even more. It’s especially effective with red lipstick, which always looks too severe on my complexion when applied on its own. 

Burt’s actually makes lip balm that’s mixed with lipstick. I’ve tried this product a few times and it doesn’t work for me. My lips go a very odd colour and I don’t like the texture. So I’m sticking with mixing the two products.  

I remember both my Mum and Grandmother dabbing their lips with tissue paper to soften the colour of their lipstick. I’m glad that I can use lip balm.

There are an abundance of neutrally toned animal print blouses in stores at the moment as retailers transition their collections into Autumn. Although animal print product, especially cheetah and leopard prints, are nothing new, I’m enjoying their appearance on a much larger assortment of soft blouse silhouettes. I think I’ve fallen in love with animal print all over again. 

An animal print is both classic and edgy. It has an amazing retro and regal integrity, as well as a theatrical and racy one. It suits both earthy, arty, dramatic and eclectic fashion personas, AND it suits those with a more simple and understated sense of style. In short, it’s a brilliant print that does not date — much like the polka dot. 

Animal print blouses can be worn with skirts and trousers for business casual, and they can be worn with jeans. They tend to look really good with solid black and brown support acts, or denim blue. Lighter toned animal prints look fab with dove grey, cream and white bottoms. I particularly like a leopard animal print blouse worn with a bright red skirt, red pair of trousers, or layered under a sleeveless red sheath dress. This bold statement always makes me smile. I also love animal print worn with red accessories. 

It’s amazing how an animal print can function both as a basic and as a statement piece. I guess that’s the nature of a fairly timeless and ageless item of clothing. Versatile!

I’ve been thinking about this for a while and a recent article in Business Insider was the catalyst for finally writing down some thoughts. The parents of teenage model Hailey Clauson are suing Urban Outfitters and the photographer for putting a sexually suggestive photo of their daughter on a T-shirt. In this case the model’s age itself doesn’t bother me — Urban Outfitters caters to a young audience — but I do find it jarring to see a 15 year old in such a provocative pose. 

Not that provocative poses are necessarily bad. Last year we documented some very racy retail advertising in Zurich and Milan (caution: not suitable for work) and this doesn’t faze me much. Even nudity can be tasteful in advertising.

That said, I do think the sheer amount of sexuality in ads these days is getting tedious. I’m tired of seeing provocative poses, lustful looks and pouty faces.

Recently forum member Jonesy pointed us to Jezebel’s take on “SexyFace”:

SexyFace, of course, is the ridiculous, open-mouthed, come-hither look that is always the go to for stories on ingenues and sex symbols. A woman is usually seated in a somewhat awkward position, with her eyes expressing one emotion (lust for sex symbols, innocence for ingenues) and her mouth hanging open in a way that makes it seem like she’ll do anything with it except, you know, talk to you.

She captures it very well. And once your attention is drawn to the phenomenon, you’ll see SexyFace everywhere — advertising, magazines, fashion blogs, the red carpet, and even in social networking profile pictures. It all seems so silly and obvious. Why is this happening? Is a sexually provocative look the best way to capture our attention these days? 

Of course, things get really complicated when the trend of selling with sex mingles with the trend of ever younger models. Then it can quickly go from tedious to offensive. American Apparel has been pushing this boundary for a while now, and it seems that Urban Outfitters has just jumped on the bandwagon. No doubt sex is a compelling, sophisticated message to use when marketing to a younger market that is eager to grow up, but is that ok? I don’t think so.

Maybe one day people will look at this blog post and laugh at how much of a prude I was for being offended by a 15 year old in a sexually charged pose. Perhaps some people would even think so today. How about you?