Yay or Nay: Babydoll/Tunic-length Dresses OR: how do you know when to keep/let-go of a style? - YouLookFab Forum

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Yay or Nay: Babydoll/Tunic-length Dresses OR: how do you know when to keep/let-go of a style?

Ket

Veteran

Alright, you don't know until you try. However, I would like your honest opinions before I buy a couple of mini dresses.

I recently tried an old favorite: chiffon tunic. I got a lot of positive response here and in everyday life.

I've found some shorter, baby-doll style dresses. I'm wondering if it's worth trying them or not.

Some points I question and mull over:

I'm 5'11, curvy, and nearly 41 years-old. Am I beyond this style of dress? Is it actually even flattering on me?

This year, I started shifting more toward a slightly retro/bombshell feel, with peplums, waist length or tucked blouses, and the like. I like how my figure looks in them. And yet... here I am looking at tunic-length or baby-doll style dress. It is definitely a comfort dressing thing for me. I wore these a LOT 2010-2018 back when the hipster, ingenue, girl-next-door vibe was so very strong. I can't tell if this style is a bit juvenile for me and I need to let this go. Or, if it's still a style that serves me.

How do you know if a style is serving you? Or if it's time to let it go?

What do you all think?

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19 replies

Latest reply was from Ket

cat2

Veteran

I did a bit of a purge when I hit 40, and got rid of things that had been in style at one point but never really suited me. For me that was shorter skirts, skirts with high slits, leather trimmed and color blocked things that made me look like a Star Trek extra, and anything too body con. I wasn’t getting rid of them because I thought I was too old for them, just that I had accumulated them along the way and they really weren’t me. You have the challenge of rebuilding your wardrobe, but it’s also an opportunity not to clutter it with things that don’t really feel like you. Trust your current judgment on where you want to go.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

I think we shouldn’t be influenced by thoughts on being “too old” for certain looks, and I am also aware that people older than oneself will always laugh at the thought that someone feels old at a certain age- my patients in their 80s certainly say that about anyone a couple of decades younger than them. It’s more about one’s own comfort. I stopped wearing shorter shorts in the last few years because I am not happy with the appearance of my thighs just above the knee now. I feel better in longer shorts.
What cat2 says above is wise.
I would say if you hanker after them, give them a try! Just make sure they are returnable.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I'm nodding along with Jenni!

Try them, Ket! They would make great tunics of they fit properly.

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

If you feel good wearing them you are not too old. Try and see.

Lisa

Veteran

I think both have great pattern, colors, and drape/silhouettes that make them worth a try. As for age and dressing, that doesn't matter in my book. I'm in my late 40s and wear colorful outfits and graphic tees more now that I ever did before. Many fashion blogs/columns would say to get more conservative, wear more neutrals, be more classic, show less skin, etc etc yet as I age I'm actually doing the opposite.

What does matter is what style/persona you want to portray to the world and if the clothing makes you feel good/aligned with that style/persona when you put it on. The key here is to clearly know what you want your style to be and then find the right pieces that compliment it. For example, my current style is casual/soft, sporty, playful which I identified in this post. I keep this in mind when I add new pieces to make sure I stay true to this current leg of my style journey.

Sal

Veteran

I think cat2 put it well-some styles stick with us though our life and others we leave behind. I don’t think these are juvenile - I also think they might be something that is from a past you. Only you can decide that.

I just purchased some shorts well above the knee at 54 - for sport and exercise -but I will wear them at the beach or end up with them on socially at some point.

BlueJay

Veteran

I wouldn't worry about age and I would think instead about comfort and fit, especially sitting down with a shorter hem. They're both cute!

Janet

(website)

Veteran

I try not tot frame these questions in terms of age, but rather: does this style reflect who I am now and moving forward in this phase of my life? Sometimes I’m attracted to styles that I loved on me in an earlier time, but I have to do some hard reckoning to accept they are for past-me, not current-me.

I am quite a bit older than you (59) so it is inevitable that these questions can bring up thoughts about aging, but on a more personal and less judgmental level, I can sometimes try on a look I loved in the past and see… well, not what I want to be now. It can be a little jarring, if I’m honest about it, but it’s a decent reality check. I find myself putting my own clothes back on and sighing in relief that I feel like my current self again, and not a poseur or a woman trying to recapture her youth.

So that’s my long-winded way of saying try one of those pieces on, styled as you want to style it today, and see if it resonates and a “hell yes!” If it doesn’t, I’d say listen to your instincts.

Ket

Veteran

Cat, I love your wisdom in this: " You have the challenge of rebuilding your wardrobe, but it’s also an opportunity not to clutter it with things that don’t really feel like you." Definitely giving this all thought <3

Jenni, I love your thoughts! Aging is all relative isn't it?

Angie, I take it all to heart! I was actually thinking the same thing re: potential tunics. I placed my order. I will report back and see what you all think

Lisa, I am so with you! I look dreadfully frumpy and boring in more classic styles, etc. So the old advice to, well, age old doesn't work for me. Super good reminder to pull in the style keywords! These tunics don't exactly gel with the "Sensual Eclectic" style words and mood I have been feeling into since last summer. However, they do fit somewhat into my general autumn/winter style inspirations and loves.

Ket

Veteran

Sal, so true about only oneself deciding what is for now and what is past. I went ahead and ordered both dresses. Maybe trying them again will give me my answer!

Bluejay, well said! I don't know why I'm suddenly worrying about aging. I wore such dresses even in my early 30s without a qualm or concern. I do know that I'll likely wear these with leggings. They're definitely not going to be bare-leg adventures while running after my 7 year-old, ha!

Janet, ever the voice of insight <3 Thank you so dearly for sharing. I think I still don't know where I am... If I'm holding onto past-me or this is still true to current-me. I wonder if I need some time to let everything swirl and roll around subconsciously, let it all be -- and see what comes up. Sometimes there is some tension (and/or overthinking??) between what aesthetically looks good on me, what sings to my heart, and how it all works out in real life. I also like a lot of different aesthetics, and I'm trying to honor that so I don't feel boxed in again.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Ket, I totally get this! I’m sometimes swayed by styles that look good on me, but don’t *feel* like me at this stage of life, or don’t suit my lifestyle (tailored dresses, I’m looking at you). Trying these things on and investing in them minimally when you do step into this place can help you feel like you’re experimenting without losing your way. Good luck!

citygirldc

(website)

Veteran

I also went through that stage when I was your age. I love vintage wear and would wear it in heartbeat but don't want it to look costume-y. I'm sure you can find pieces that are classic with a vintage vibe.

As for the 2 tops, do you feel like they are you? Do you feel fab in them? If not, then move on. That's what I ask myself these days.

Ket

Veteran

Citygirl, that’s so interesting you went through a similar stage at my age. I wonder if it’s a 40s thing in general? Yo answer your specific question: I do really feel they could be me. The floral number especially caught my eye. I won’t know with certainty until I try them on. I am hoping they will look interesting worn as tunics over jeans. Im also not above trying them on with tights, though they may be too short to wear that way and feel comfortably covered. I will post try-ons when they arrive!

Bijou

Veteran

Ket, I had this dilemma a few years ago when I bought a tartan skirt that the 20-year-old me would have loved. It was a bit sad to realise that something that in prior years was part of my signature style, no longer felt right. It was not a case of never wearing a tartan skirt again, but the tartan skirt that I now own, gives me the tartan edge I enjoy without the exuberance of the red tartan mini that it replaced. I like to think of it as a style evolution rather than an issue of aging!

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Ket

Veteran

Oh BIJOU!! (Yes all caps!) What a terrific, amazing, gorgeous skirt! I actually want to find one of my own…

Back on track— I totally hear what you’re saying. I ordered the dresses to try. What you shared helps immensely though. If the baby doll dresses don’t work as tunics, I can perhaps find something similar yet entirely new. Perhaps some 70s style flowy, long wrap dresses???

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Just because something looks great - doesn't mean you should wear it. It has to feel great too. Listen to your feelings, Ket! Let us know what you think of these dresses as tunics. You're never going to know until you find out. It's going to be interesting

Sometimes we simply move on from a look, I used to wear fitted pencil skirts and sheath dresses. I stopped about 8 years ago because despite looking just fine - they felt wrong. I need room and swoosh on the bottom half of my body. My skirts and dresses need to move - (especially when working with clients, walking most of the toe, and with doggies in tow) - so I switched to A-lines, flares, and sack silhouettes. Fitted on top in a dress in good, as long as the bottom is roomy. Just as dressy, but a different silhouette.

Hope that makes sense!

Joy

Veteran

I am old, and I know it. I have not worn shorts for years and am done with short skirts . Or thought I was but am now thinking of them with tights for winter. My legs are thin and shapely. They were my best part before vains and brown spots made them ugly. But opac tights would cover that. Besides skirts are getting shorter and it's harder finding long ones. I know when I look in the mirror.

Ket

Veteran

Angie, that does all make sense and I really love what you shared <3 I think I'm still struggling with how my weight has fluctuated and if or how to shift my style with that. (lots of deep old roots and scars here, as I was once morbidly obese many years ago.) Some of what I used to wear--boho, for instance--doesn't always look as good currently compared to before. But then switching up clothes to things that are a better fit body-shape-wise doesn't feel great all the time either. And then I do notice myself aging, though it's not top of the list for concerns. Overall, I feel a little in the middle, fleshing it out, and not sure which direction to go. Not sure there are solutions. Just processing aloud :}

I absolutely will share photos of the mini dresses when they arrive for your eagle eye and excellent feedback

Ket

Veteran

Joy, I LOVE LOVE LOVE that you are considering short skirts and shorts with tights for this winter! I absolutely love that look so, so much! It's not one I've ever felt I could pull off or wear easily. But I just adore it on other ladies. Post your shorts+tights outfits when you wear them