Yeah, that is the conventional wisdom. And not only am I a lawyer, but my husband is a criminal defense attorney. What happened is that we had all sat through 2 days of voir dire and picked 12 jurors. Another attorney had already been bumped. Then they picked 4 additional people as possible "alternates" and ended up choosing me and a guy. However, they then give you all juror numbers and no one knows who the alternates will actually be until the end.
I answered both the DA and the defense honestly when they asked me questions and told them I felt I could be a fair and impartial juror, which is completely true. Everyone in the courtroom laughed when the DA said. "Wait, you're ________'s wife?" and I said, "Yes, but I might not have married him if I'd known I'd never be able to be on a jury." This is a small town and word got around instantly that I was on this jury. My husband joked that he must not be that good if I was left on.
I have to say, I didn't realize how devastated I would be to not be able to deliberate. It's like being one number off from winning the lottery, and it will never happen again. Aaargh! I am waiting for a phone call from the baliff who promised me he'd call when the verdict was in. Am DYING to know and I think a couple of the jurors will talk to me afterward, as we all got very friendly being stuck together for so long...
