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Who am I?

Rejoiceandbe

I have read the blog for a couple of years but only just worked up the courage to join the forum. In the last 4 years life has undergone many changes (health, location, occupation) and I have lost my sense of fashion direction. Where would you recommend that I start?

Dressing

20 replies

Latest reply was from Rejoiceandbe

kkards

Veteran

Welcome. You’ve come (as I’m sure you know) to the right place

i’d start with a couple of Angie’s blog posts about refreshing your wardrobe and style
https://youlookfab.com/2012/01.....e-renewal/
https://youlookfab.com/2018/10.....our-style/

https://youlookfab.com/2012/01.....e-persona/

then start by gathering a collection of looks you like, you can post them here and we can help define what unites them. Or if you’re up for it, post a couple of WIW, tell us what you like, or done like about it and we can help you move forward from there.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Welcome, Rejoiceandbe! Thanks, kkards, for your suggestions.

I'll add these posts too:

https://youlookfab.com/2015/11.....e-renewal/

https://youlookfab.com/2014/06.....tyle-tips/

Next step is to edit and review what you have. Pull out the items that you enjoy wearing and assess why. There might be items you haven't worn in a while because of the pandemic. Re-fit them on. Assess how you feel about them now.

Bijou

Veteran

Welcome, I really like your name. For me it was a bit of a process to evolve my style and not just try to copy or emulate the style of someone else. That is Angie’s magic, she helps everyone to develop their own unique style. It is a bit of work and does require some soul searching, but is so rewarding to feel that the way you dress is congruent with the person you know you are on the inside.

Helena

Veteran

Welcome, and I'll just add to be very patient and gentle with yourself ... the one thing I've learned from this forum is that it's an ongoing journey rather than a destination ... so enjoy the process best you can!

Lana

(website)

Veteran

Perfect time to find yourself. I went through something similar when my kids left for college. You’re in the right place!

rachylou

Veteran

Hello! Seconding the above! I think it really helps to know what you really do with your time. I think about how many dinner dresses I had when mostly what I did with my time was walk the dog!

Allora

Hi and welcome! I'm looking forward to you sharing your journey with us!

As suggested by rachylou, I would start by evaluating your lifestyle and how you spend your time. I am not sure if this will help you, but here is something that I recently did and it has helped me a lot.

I am on the verge of retiring and just went through a thorough evaluation of my wardrobe. I identified four major "buckets" or scenarios that I will need clothes for as these will be my primary activities when I retire (note that we live in a mountain town that is quite casual wrt dress):
(1) at home casual (staying around the house all day)
(2) nicer casual (going out to dinner, meeting friends, casual parties, etc.)
(3) active/athletic wear (yoga, hiking, walking)
(4) special occasion (weddings, funerals, nicer parties/events).

Then I identified the clothes or at least the types of clothes I needed for each bucket (e.g., jeans to wear with flat sandals/sneakers for at home casual, nicer jeans to wear with higher heels for nicer casual) and maybe how many of those pieces I needed for each bucket based on how much of my time was spent in each scenario (e.g., estimating I will spend 70% of my time in the at home casual mode, etc.) This allowed me to evaluate what I already own and hone in on any gaps in my current wardrobe. It also allowed me to identify those pieces in my wardrobe that I might not need anymore (business attire, etc.)

Importantly for me, virtually everything in my wardrobe needs to work for domestic and international travel (in other words, I don't want to buy any clothes that will just be used for travel - it all overlaps).

This method is all in the early stages for me but I'm optimistic as it seems to be working well so far. As you can see, this doesn't address my style type (minimalist, classic, etc.) as I pretty much have that nailed down and I know what I like and what works for me. So that is a separate activity that you might need to do.

Good luck!!

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

I think your closet is your best mood board for figuring out your style. Even the items you don’t wear count. What do you like about each item? What don’t you like? Are there any broad themes that are expressed differently in different pieces, but keep popping up? Maybe bold geometric patterns like stripes, plaid and polka dots, or maybe certain fabrics. Also look at how you tend to combine things. Many people like to pair oversized on one half with something more fitted on the other, like long over lean or big wide pants with a shorter, slightly fitted top. Is that you?

Runcarla

Veteran

Welcome, Rejoice! I live in Ontario as well - on the shores of Lake Ontario, about an hour east of Toronto. The recent tease of spring has got me packing up my heavier winter gear, evaluating my summer capsule, and working to identify gaps for S/S.

You will discover that there are several Canadians on this site.

Anonymous

Welcome! I’m retired, & my husband & I are retiring in a tropical climate. I have slowly revamped my wardrobe for that climate & lifestyle, & have donated the rest (Winter clothes & boots mostly). I’m still figuring out my transition, though, because I don’t do casual well, which is what the beach calls for. My wardrobe is a work in progress. I hope you figure out what you need to do to make your wardrobe work for you & express who you are.

Style Fan

Veteran

Welcome, Rejoice! YLF is a beautiful place to find your fashion direction. I also live in Ontario. We spent our working life in Southwestern Ontario and retired to Muskoka about ten years ago.

Rejoiceandbe

Thank you all for your kind and encouraging words. It's good to know that others have found themselves in a similar place and that I am not as "odd" as I sometime feel. I will carefully read over the suggested links and think hard about my current needs. I tend to know what I don't like, not what I do.

Barbara Diane

Veteran

In addition to the above, I would suggest looking at your wardrobe with an eye to remixing items. If you don’t like something let it go, but if unsure try that item on with dressier or more casual items, different lengths of tops or bottoms, turn up cuffs, different accessories, brighter or paler lipstick, etc. If it is soft try adding structure.
Occasionally I keep something even if I’m not wearing it and it ends up being perfect with something I buy later.

gryffin

Veteran

Rejoiceandbe - I just wanted to say welcome!! I think you've nailed the question "who am I?" Once you know that then you can decide how you want to dress to express who you are. I highly recommend Malcolm Levene's book. Really figuring out your mantra, your style descriptors, your signature pieces, what your color palate is. Once you know who you are and how you want to present yourself, in an ever evolving way, you can begin look for people and photos that call to that and then actual items and outfits- but it's always the journey back to you!! GL!!

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Jaime

(website)

Veteran

You have received so much great advice on this thread - it's been a pleasure to read. Good luck! And as you know the forum is an incredibly supportive and helpful place when you have questions.

Staysfit

Veteran

Welcome Rejoiceandbe! I had no fashion direction when I started with this forum. I’m glad everyone else has good suggestions of where to start because I made many embarrassing mistakes in my journey before getting things (mostly) sorted. Angie’s advice has proven the best of all.

Anonymous

Welcome This site is a big rabbit hole of knowlege and resources, and of course we're all figuring it out together here on the forum!

Cee

Veteran

I start with underwear... I'm not making THAT mistake again !

Jonesy

Veteran

You have gotten tons of excellent advice! If I were you, I would dig into the links Angie and others have provided, and explore the archives (Angie has written a blog post every day for 15+ years, so there is a wealth of information!). Then, when you feel ready to make the leap, post a few WIWs (what I wore pictures of yourself) to see how things look and get some feedback, which is unfailingly kind and generous around here.

Rejoiceandbe

Thank you all for taking the time to reply with your suggestions and advice. I will be doing a lot of thinking.