Went to the mall tonight and feel like ranting! - YouLookFab Forum

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Went to the mall tonight and feel like ranting!

Sveta

(website)

Veteran

On my mall trip this evening I realized what is the most sure way for me to damage my self-esteem: just start trying on trousers and jeans in the stores! It is really depressing to stare at oneself in the mirror and see all that unattractive body bits sticking here and there. Grrr! Trousers and jeans make me feel fat and make me want to run away from the mall as soon as possible (which may be a good thing for my budget though). After trying them on in two different stores tonight I just don't want to look on any of them EVER AGAIN!
This is exactly why I love jackets and woven tops: I never have problems to fit them and I don't look fat in them (if I ignore my bottom part). I bought some not-pants items today and that made me feel much better: I will post K/R tomorrow.

Thanks for letting me rant like this: it feels better already!

Shopping

30 replies

Latest reply was from ManidipaM

Anonymous

Sorry you had a bad experience in the stores. I must say though that when you have posted WIW pics wearing pants/jeans you have never looked fat. You have impeccable style it must have just been a bad selection.

MsLuna

Veteran

@Sveta Sorry the trousers/jeans didnt' work out! I know what you mean though - this is why I never wear trousers and jeans (and realized it isn't my style to begin with). However, as tracina said, you do have impeccable style (from what I've seen). Perhaps look into finding a good tailor?

sarah

Veteran

Oh, Sveta, I'm so sorry. I know about your hate-affair with pants. Just remember that it's not you, it's them. YOU are one stylish gal with a true flair for fashion!

AJ

Veteran

I hear ya, Sveta! Pants/jeans rises are so frustrating for me, then there is the problem of fitting the backside, then the legs looking too baggy with my chicken legs and lastly, do I buy for heels or flats? ACK!

I am glad to hear that you did find some items that you liked. I look forward to seeing them.

K. Period.

Veteran

Sometimes it just feels great to get it down on paper (or at least virtual paper), doesn't it? I bought new jeans today that at last have a reasonably high rise. I don't want jeans on my navel, no way. But witnessing them cradling my leftover baby belly? Like a little belly sling? No thanks! How could it have taken manufacturers ten years to get away from super low rise? Sheesh.

Some days, no mater how okay you are with your body, the shopping gets you down. My only consolation is that my three closest friends and best shopping buddies all represent one of the others of the four primary body types. They all have bad shopping days. Every one, even the tall, slim model body type. That is a real eye opener. It makes me feel a lot better about my body too.

Sveta

(website)

Veteran

Thanks ladies for the therapy!
I guess I feel this way because I carry my weight in my thighs and they are really on display in almost any pants or jeans. I guess these garments just have not been created for my body type
I think it is a weird Murphy's law but when I look for inspirations on blogs or catalogs pant outfits attract me more than skirts or dresses - I guess it is the longing for what you cannot have!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Ugh. I know this feeling. The pants that don't glide up over the thighs (that apparently giide up every OTHER woman's thighs...) Or if they do go up, look...wrong.

But it's not you. It's the pants. You always look amazing in your outfits.

Kate

Veteran

I am most attracted to pants too, Sveta, and like you, find them hardest to fit. I just got a pair of yellow jeans in the mail and they looked so God awful on me I wanted to take a hammer to my mirror (didn't want the cleanup, so I refrained). Blouses and jackets can be almost as tough due to my broad shoulders, small bust and long torso, but I was immeasurably cheered to find that the yellow blazer, which came in the same order with those @#$%! jeans, was a good fit. I should have taken a photo of me in those jeans and posted it, just for the sheer horror of the fit. Instead, I'll leave you all with a pic of the cute jacket.

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lyn*

(website)

Veteran

Aww! That sounds like quite a dreadful experience for you! I have the same problem with bottoms - there's plenty of cute skirts and dresses calling your name

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

Can't wait to see your purchases. I empathize with the pants frustration. Maybe that's why I am attracted to shoe-shopping. Shoes are extremely hard to fit (and to find fit, comfort, and style all at once can be REALLY hard!), and yet, when I try a pair of shoes that doesn't fit or feel good, I don't start hating my feet, don't look at them in the mirror and bemoan their width or girth or flabbiness or whatever. Funny, huh? Maybe we just need to think "feet" when we try on those inevitably ill-fitting trousers in the dressing room!

Michelle

(website)

Veteran

Sveta, I've seen you in action as you shop and know that you have an incredibly discerning eye, but I wonder if you're just your own worst critic in this case. Most of us are apt to be much harder on ourselves than we would be on others, and I now many a person who, while capable of offering the most objective assessment in the world of everyone else, looks in the mirror and genuinely sees a wildebeast staring back at them no matter what.
If this is you, I have a solution - come back to Toronto, reunite the gang at Yorkdale, and shop for pants while we cheerlead!

christieanne

Veteran

I think that's why when I find a brand or style that does work for me, I end up with multiples of the same - like the Banana Republic Martin Fit. I wouldn't even bother with the others since I know that is the right one.

I despise buying jeans and button up blouses for the same reasons you ranted over but it isn't really us - it is the companies who use odd size fit models and then just size up.
Clinton Kelly had a blog post some time ago about how we shouldn't wonder why celebrities always look good in clothes and why average women struggle with fit because everything they wear (t shirts, jeans, casual or dressy) is tailored for them.

It's totally not you!

Louise

Veteran

As a fellow pretty pear I feel your pain, but please remember its the pants that are at fault not you x

Vildy

Veteran

I like the idea of finding a reliable cut of pants and sticking to them. And also, I often favor trying things on without looking in the mirror and noticing the feel of them on you before you see them. I'll bet that lots of the pants rejects didn't feel right, either.

Irene

Veteran

As an hourglass, I have fitting problems all over my body. Waists are too big, thighs are too tight, busts are too tight, or maybe they fit shoulders but nowhere else. I feel your pain. Just be glad you only have problems with pants. Try being a busty gal in her 20s during summer and see how she fits in all those flimsy tops with spaghetti straps or no straps at all.

Jjsloane

Veteran

I feel your pain and frustration. I Want to wear pants. I struggle to find ones that fit and flatter. That's why I have so many shoes. We're here and are looking forward to seeing what you did get instead.

bella

(website)

Veteran

I empathize Sveta. I absolutely loathe buying jeans and trousers. I hope my current jeans never ever wear out so I don't have to go out and try on another pair. - that's how much I hate trying on jeans.I am hoping to stock on my current pair while it is still available at Gap.

anchie

Veteran

That is the reason why I don't shop for the pants and jeans in person. Somehow combination of dressing room light and mirrors makes everything so unflattering. When I try the same items at home, they don't look so bad.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

I sympathize too! I can also be having a day when I feel perfectly fine and attractive and well-proportioned, and then I try on a pair of pants and feel like a giant blob. I envy people who complain of their skinny "stick" legs until I realize we all have challenges. And I remember to be thankful for all my big, strong legs can do.

missvee

Veteran

I agree with you that getting pants that fit can be a huge nuisance. Have you thought of seeking out a local dressmaker or tailor and having some made for you? I think it would be worth a bit of extra money to have something that really fits and flatters you. There are some wonderful all-season wools out there that would be a great choice.

journey

thank you, Michelle, for the "wildebeast in the mirror" comment! love it! it sums up so much about women and their mirrors!

Jonesy

Veteran

Sveta, maybe you are striking out now so you can have plenty in your budget to score some perfect pants in Chicago :)!!!! Is that a possibility? I remember a while back you tried on some slouchy, vaguely '80s pants in a taupe color. I think they were from the Gap. I remember really liking them on you, but suggesting them in black...Maybe you could find some slouchier ones that work perfectly for you, with the wide selection available in Chicago?

Chin up!! It's totally 100% not you--it's the pants!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

What Jonesy said!

Sveta, we all have wardrobe items that are tricky to fit. We have seen you in plenty of trousers and jeans that look sensational - please remember that

rae

(website)

Veteran

I agree with every word you've said, Sveta. Pants are just evil! I believe I am a smaller size than you, too, so believe that it is the pants and not you! The cuts are just not there. :T

Hm, I have great love for jackets, too. I can stroll into F21 any day of the week and find at least 3 jackets I love and that fit perfectly. You are onto something!

Lisa

Veteran

Sveta-I have the same thing, attraction to wardrobe items I can never or very rarely wear. When I look at my saved inspiration photos they are all pencil skirts and sheath dresses, two items I find impossible to fit. And I always cringe at trying on anything on my bottom half, it's so much easier to get changed in a dressing room when you don't have to remove your shoes and often I went through all that effort for items that do not fit.

This is probably why I wear so many jeans, trousers are almost impossible to fit. I'm fortunate that at work right now I can wear jeans. But at my last job I had to wear trousers (or skirts or dresses which I never wore) and I would purchase loose one's because my other choice of too tight one's was even worse than wearing looser fit one's. And I would get so frustrated shopping for trousers I would always end up settling.

Vicki

(website)

Veteran

Sveta, you have such style and elegance and I agree with Sarah that it's not you; it's the pants. Don't give up on them. There will be a beautiful pair out there very soon and I can't wait to see them.

cheryle (Dianthus)

(website)

Veteran

Sveta, you have great style and look gorgeous in everything you wear. The reason for this is that you are discerning and refuse to settle for less than perfect. I have seen you in many great pants outfits so they are out there but it can be darn frustrating to find the needle in a haystack of mediocrity.

Keep your chin up. It isn't you.

Sveta

(website)

Veteran

You are the best! You know how to make a gal fell better!
Kate, too bad about the yellow jeans but that yellow jacket is GORGEOUS!
Michelle, I like this idea! We should plan something for spring!
Janet, this is exactly what happened to me: I felt great all day and then after trying a couple of pairs in the dressing room I felt like a deflated balloon.
Jonesy, this is my secret hope for Chicago trip so you may need to endure pants shopping with me!
You know what is really funny? I complain that it is hard and frustrating for me to fit trousers and jeans and that dresses and skirts are much easier, right? Well, I just counted the number of bottoms I have: 3 skirts, 6 dresses and 8 pairs of trousers and jeans! I have more pants than I have any other bottoms even though they are the most difficult to fit! Isn't it weird?
Thank you all again for your words of therapy. My weakness moment has passed and I am back to my confident self - thanks to you!

Amy

(website)

Veteran

Shopping for pants is the worst...well, swimsuit shopping may trump that, I don't know. I don't shop for swimming suits anymore.

I'm glad you found some other pieces to cheer you up!

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