Wearers of color - seeking your wisdom (photos added) - YouLookFab Forum

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Wearers of color - seeking your wisdom (photos added)

Helena

Veteran

Hi all,

I've been working through some wardrobe analysis and realized that I feel most polished and pulled-together in neutrals. HOWEVER, I also learned that I reach for color more than I realized - within my limited wardrobe, I love royal purple, all blues including teal, blush, wine and have been hankering for something red. I also can see the flattery that color can bring.

So the dilemma is - I put it on and feel great - but by the end of the day, I often feel frumpy or sloppy. I apparently love color but haven't worked out how to wear it. I keep trying to just give it up but I can't seem to!

What am I doing wrong, do you think? How do you wear color with polish and classic style? What are your best color-wearing tips?

Dressing

26 replies

Latest reply was from rabbit

columbine(erin)

Veteran

I'm going through some similar thoughts with my wardrobe. I've worn black bottoms and a jewel toned top like a uniform for way too long; this year have been adding navy as my new neutral, and I'm realizing that if I want to add some colors to that, like a mint green and pink or red, then I need some more shoe colors as well, and several more toppers, to pull it together.

deb

Veteran

Last fall I started wearing colored bottom and it felt really good. They mix well with all neutral tops. Maybe you can incorporate one or two into your wardrobe and see how you feel.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

I'm just the opposite of Deb -- I don't love colored bottoms on me. When I do choose them, I keep the color dark or muted, but then I'm not a fan of my lower half, so I hesitate to call more attention to it with bright colors.

I love color but tend to wear it in one or two items in an outfit -- say, jacket and shoes. Or in a print in a top, or perhaps a printed colorful scarf with a solid color top worn with jeans. I usually feel uncomfortable in head-to-toe color, and I like my colorful prints to be grounded on a background of a neutral like black, navy, white or grey.

I think it would be helpful to see the outfits that left you feeling not-so-great by the end of the day. Maybe then we could help you pinpoint what you were doing that doesn't make you happy.

Liz

Veteran

It intrigues me that color turns "frumpy or sloppy" feeling on you. Do you think there is there something about your colorful clothing items that shows bagging or wrinkles or wear more easily? For myself, I feel like I sometimes need higher quality in my colorful clothing items, because they can end up looking less polished more easily. I haven't really diagnosed why for myself yet.

Helena

Veteran

hey, thanks all here are a few examples: the blush scarf and teal sweater i felt great in, but then just didn't feel confident in them as i went through my day. the outfits are so simple (which i love) so it's not as though i was taking a big risk. the mint sweater i never even wore out ... i changed into black!!

these were just regular-day outfits, so no special styling involved. could have been my light gray winter topper that threw me ... perhaps under a dark topper i would have felt better? it's all very irrational - the outfits may be nothing special, but they certainly look find, to me at least. think there is something psychological here!!!!

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Helena

Veteran

that's a great point Liz ... the teal sweater in particular was not a perfect fit - a bit short - that could definitely be part of it.

does anyone feel a bit more vulnerable in color - it's more "fallible", isn't it?

dustt

Veteran

I really love the look of a neutral ensemble with the color coming from the accessories - strong colors in the bags, shoes & belts. It's an easy way to transition into more color as well. That said I am also a huge fan of neutral top - colored bottoms with neutral shoes - so I'd say start with one pair of slim COLORED ankle pants and see what you can do with it!! - I think you'll love it!!

Liz

Veteran

What do you mean by color being more "fallible"?

ETA: I realized that, in writing, that question can sound really strong -- I don't mean it that way. Just curious. I'm intrigued by what that might mean to you; it seems like there's a clue there.

Helena

Veteran

No worries Liz - meaning, it's easier (for me at least) to feel like I've made a mistake when wearing color. Neutrals are just harder to get wrong - at least for me. Does that make sense?

The question of course ... wrong to who? And why do I care? I do live in quite an affluent area, and blessed as we are, it's hard to not feel like the poor cousin at times, esp. since I am not one to spend big bucks on most of my clothes. Think that's part of it ... neutrals look "richer" to me ... hate to admit that, I know it's obnoxious to even think in those terms, but just being honest as to my dilemma as I think about it more ...

rabbit

Veteran

I think your blush scarf looks GREAT on you. Is it just wearing a scarf at all that felt awkward? They do move around a bit.

With the other two sweaters, they look very good to me, but some possible things that might be registering subconsciously for you since you are a very detail conscious minimalist dresser:

-fit/cut: you would be able to see if another feature of the item was throwing it off for you. I had a lavender sweater which I thought was a great color but I kept wanting to return, and finally did because I just didn't like how the sleeve cuffs were shaped.

-it's not the exact right color for you. It might be a good teal, for example, but a shade too bright, or muted, or green. It might be a good mint, but need a solid knit to read as it's exact yarn color. Again, sometimes this is easier to tell by comparing it to another teal or mint against your skin.

-the blue jean color isn't quite right for it. With some colors grayer jeans just look better to me than blue ones. Trying different neutral bottoms could make a difference.

-the color reads differently in daylight, fluorescent light, etc. (This particularly happens to me when I'm trying to match very dark blues).

Again, not saying that any of these is at play, but possible questions to ask.

I second the others that scarves and shoes are really great ways to add color without needing to re-calibrate an entire outfit.

ETA: Ah, just saw your answer to Liz. Yes, to me neutrals definitely feel 'safer' when you are working to pass/'hide in plain sight' in an environment where you might feel like a bit of an outlier in some ways. But then again, wanting to experiment with color might mean you want to stretch out of this artificial restriction a bit?

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Well, all these colours suit you well. So it's not that.

I actually adore #1 on you and to me, that reads as neutral. The blush with blue in the scarf is fabulous with your personal colouring and against the dark backdrop of jeans and sweater. In that case, I'll be it was something about your coat that threw you, because I honestly can't see any other reason.

I also like #2 but that bright teal is more "attention grabbing" and maybe that doesn't feel right for your personality. Your word "fallible" makes me think that, also. You may simply feel too exposed in a bright colour. It suits you, but doesn't feel like you. Nancylee has been struggling with this issue -- a lover of soft neutrals, she's come to learn that she looks best in bright, clear colours. Yet she can only handle so much of those.

#3 is very soft. I wonder if a lower contrast bottom might feel better to you with that one. So that the whole is blended and there is less of an abrupt demarkation between top and bottom.

I also prefer neutrals for the most part....yet I love all the blues, cranberry red, other berry tones, orchids, and even fuchsia. Here's what I've learned.

Blue is the easiest. Yet some blues are too strong for me in some seasons. I only wear cobalt in spring/ summer. Do not like to wear it when the light is wintery.

Pastels (like your mint sweater) often wash me out and make me feel insipid. But in summer, the palest blues feel wonderful.

If I'm wearing a bright, I like to combine it with white or with navy or denim, as a rule. Brights with black feel pretty strong on me. Too strong, really.

I can wear more than one bright item at a time ... but if so, I need white or something light to break it up.

On the whole, I prefer bright tops/ jackets to bright bottoms, but I do like a bright skirt.

It's okay to decide that neutrals are your thing. Clearly Claire has built her entire wardrobe in her key neutrals, and feels absolutely fab. She looks terrific in pinks, blues, and lots of other colours, but she feels garish and not like herself. Maybe your style persona is similar!

carter

Veteran

I know exactly what you mean. In looking back at my old WIWs today, I saw a great deal more color in my work outfits last Fall and very little color in my work outfits from 2014. I do feel more put together in neutrals, but I have no idea why. I still love color, but I find I'm wearing mostly in casual outfits these days.

I love your first outfit with the scarf! I like outfit #3 as well. While the top in #2 is a fab color on you, it does feel a bit unfinished.

Watching this thread to see what you figure out!

Helena

Veteran

Just a quick note to thank everyone for the responses as I need to dash but am looking forward to reading everyone's wisdom later the evening!! Thank you for your ongoing patience with my perennial color issues!!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Ah - I just saw your response to Liz.

I feel this to some extent as well, particularly in winter. It is part of "matching the environment" as well. Not just what other people are wearing (although in northern Canadian cities we DO tend to wear neutrals in general throughout the winter, and dark neutrals in particular) but also the predominantly black, ink, grey, winter white, khaki, taupe, and brick red environment itself. (Just thinking of TO's colours here....other cities are a bit different.)

Rachylou has talked about this kind of thing before. I am certain it exerts an influence on me. Again...brighter colour works better for me in summer, and with white. It makes me understand how someone like MaryK can wear it so very well. Her light is different. Her environment is different.

I do think neutrals feel, if not "rich" then perhaps "elegant" or "sophisticated." And if that is something you aspire to, then they'll stand you in good stead. However, as Angie so brilliantly illustrates (and some of other other members, too, including Mary) colour can ALSO read as "sophisticated." It does perhaps take more skill to pull that off.

I actually like my predominantly neutral with pops of colour closet and intend to make it even more neutral in future. And I agree with others, the very best (and easiest) places to try for colour without feeling unsophisticated include: scarves (like your gorgeous one here); bags, belts, footwear. Also, a SMALL bit of colour in a top that peeks out from beneath a neutral blazer (to be worn all day indoors) or in the collar of a shirt peeking out from beneath a neutral pullover -- that can work.

It sounds as if you feel about colour rather as I feel about pattern. I really only like it in very small doses. Again (like colour) I tend to wear more of it in summer, but that is partly because it's usually broken with white, which freshens it to my eye.

Adelfa

Veteran

I have been gravitating towards toning my colors to my neutrals. I feel more confident when my color is medium to low contrast with my neutrals. Examples: wine with dark brown; cobalt with medium gray; pale pink with light gray; dark green with black. Citron with a mini b/w houndstooth check (vs solid black). I've discovered that even a color that's great on me can contribute to a frumpier look if high contrast is chopping me into segments. This approach has helped me feel better about color in my outfits!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I really like Adelfa's response -- that is sort of what I feel, too -- that colour is easier to wear if it is toned to the neutrals in question. But then I'm relatively low contrast so it probably works on me.

catgirl

Veteran

I love color but one reason I don't wear more of it is that I have a hard time finding edgier pieces in the colors I want. I've limited my palette somewhat. Edgy emerald? Not so common...

I think your scarf outfit is perfect. The other two just seem a little plain. I think sometimes we expect color to replace other needs in our clothing - at least that was my mistake. I've learned that sometimes a boring black shirt is not improved simply by being citron instead.

Helena

Veteran

First of all - you are all awesome. It's like having a bunch of wiser sisters to bounce things off, who'll all be honest, yet kind. Much appreciated

There are some wonderful suggestions here - some of the key points I am taking are: sometimes it's not about color but rather fit or styling. Introduce color in small doses, such as accessories or a shirt tempered by a neutral layer. Try a colored pant (I had this on my list for this spring). I thought the tip about keep the contrast between your color and neutral lower is great, and when I look at the times I DO feel good in color, that seems to be an element. The seasonal points are good too - I have no problem wearing say a fuchsia top with white shorts in the summer. The point about neutrals being easier than color when going for a more sophisticated look is well-taken - certainly Angie looks super-sophisticated in color - but I am no Angie!!

As always - amazing suggestions. Amazing support. Sorry I am always asking about color! It's the style thorn-in-my-side.

Jules

Veteran

I had to look really hard to see the blush in #1, and overall it reads as a great neutral ensemble.
I think coloured top + plain bottom is a very simple look that's hard to do well! Adding a patterned scarf or belt or topper somehow tempers the colour, even if they are also colour. I like colour blocking within items more than I do in outfits, somehow, if that makes sense.
Do you have neutral toppers you can try with those outfits?
Maybe smaller doses of colour, in patterns with neutrals like your scarf, would be an easier way for you to wear colour happily?

Helena

Veteran

Jules, I think you just nailed it. I admit I am weak in the topper department - I was just about the write another post and do some reading about "third pieces", as I often fail to add the crucial finishing piece for reasons of lifestyle and temperment!

However, scarves I do like, and you are right, the teal sweater with a neutral scarf would work a lot better, and I'm sure I would feel more comfortable in it. Color surrounded by neutrals seems to be a good rule for me to consider. Thank you!

poirot0153

I think I have the opposite problem. I am most comfortable in head to toe color. It doesn't matter the type of color. It can be brights, jewel tones, pastels, anything. I love the vibrancy and energy. Head to toe color with bold pattern mixing and I feel most like myself. I have noticed that when I wear neutrals with no pattern mixing I am either not feeling well or feeling sad or stressed. I feel my most frumpy in beige-y, brownish neutrals. I wore all black for an interview (black blazer, conservative black jersey wrap dress) and I almost did not recognize myself in the mirror. The ensemble looked nice on me and was very polished, but it was not truly 'me'.

I don't have much wisdom to share but I definitely understand your dilemma. When dress in neutral I look ok in the morning but I feel haggard by end of the day. Once again the emotional connection to my outfit color choice may have something to do with it.

rachylou

Veteran

This is very interesting, and an interesting discussion. Suz is right that I have this thing where I feel a strong desire to match my environment, even when it's contrary to my own style. And I was also going to say, like Suz, there's something more sophisticated - more easily sophisticated - about the neutrals. Colour is more easily playful, perhaps. Night falls, playtime is over.

It's an interesting challenge, trying to take colour from day-to-night. With your teal in #2, I could see you donning a wool shawl as a way to do it. But shawls kinda get in the way of doing things, and maybe it would actually be too warm.

Coincidentally, I've been thinking about this red and fuschia sweater I have. It's really a knit top, not a sweater. I'm trying to decide whether or not to give it away. I hate the thought of it. It's so bright, so awkward, so easily made into a suburban-tragic outfit. I suppose that's my answer, but when the stars align, it can also deliver a pow! I just don't know whether to chuck it or not.

Helena

Veteran

Rachylou, I totally relate to your dilemma - that's it exactly, why it's hard to give up on it altogether. Because when it works, it looks SO good ... but so easy to have it not work ... *sigh*

Vix

Veteran

Hi Torontogirl --

So many great points above, many that resonate with me (matching the environmental light/season, usually feeling better when I maintain a strong vertical line of deep *or* light color and use high-contrast as an accent, not always being up for the visibility color-color can bring, being picky about color-colors that make me glow).

Perhaps you really prefer *overall* lower contrast, and the scarf in #1 feels too stark against the darker elements? [I love that look in general and on you, though.]

Perhaps a preference for a column of color is why you were hankering for your darker coat instead of the light grey?

Just a few thoughts as you further your experiments....

ps As a recovering (but lately more like back-sliding!) black textile-a-holic, prints that mix neutrals with color-color are one of the key things that ease/d me into wearing non-neutrals.

You might find MaiTai's scarf-centric blog worth a look for how she uses neutral palettes with color that suits her personal coloring. Substitute "luxury scarf" for other elements (lower-priced options, printed tops or jackets) if need be.

Helena

Veteran

Thanks Vix - I'll definitely give some thought to your column of color comment - that very well might be part of it - too many broken-up elements = scattered-feeling me. Great suggestions; I'll check out that blog too. Thx!

rabbit

Veteran

Vix, another thanks, that blog is kind of amazing, both for how an incredible scarf can make an outfit, and that she uses magnets to hold them in place sometimes ??!! I wonder if that would work with a loose flowy cardigan?