Too funny! (You gotta laugh, right?)
I did find my perfect white narrow-legged jeans recently (AG Stilt: http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....ans-i-kept ). And then I'll be darned if I didn't see another pair that I liked just as much! I didn't get them. But they are Fidelity, Rev--these, but in white:
http://fidelitydenim.com/product/excellence-10/
What I like about them: they are nice, soft, thick fabric, and they feel every so comfy on. They are a little higher rise (I think it's called mid-rise, technically), and nicely perkifying for the rear view.
P.S. I predict when you find your white jeans, you'll find two!