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Successful Compromises

Jenn

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Veteran

I don't think many of us have wardrobes where every item is 100% perfect when we add it. Maybe one detail isn't quite right, some tailoring is needed, the color isn't your first choice, it's a style experiment, or you're just hoping the fit will ease in over time.

What's something you compromised on that went on to become a beloved and well-worn part of your wardrobe anyway?

When I first got my Eileen Fisher jumpsuit, I asked the forum about the pockets, which bumped out in little peaks on each of my hips, not gaping, but just...weird. I liked everything else and thought they might soften with washing and wear, so I kept anyway...and they did (or maybe they didn't, and it just doesn't bother me)! I wear it once or twice a week in warm weather now, but things could easily have gone the other way.

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Latest reply was from Minaminu

April

Veteran

I had a pair of black wide-leg knit long pants from J Jill that were hemmed to wear with my highest heels. They sat in my closet for a few years, unworn, and then I stopped wearing heels.

So I had them hemmed into a current crop length and now they are in *constant* use.

Star

Veteran

Great jumpsuit, I can see why you wear it weekly. I thrifted a rust color linen blazer (no lining) at the end of last summer. At the time it seemed a little oversized for my liking but the fact that oversized is in I thought I can live with it. Also was not sure about the color, I call it rust and my husband calls it orange, and I was not sure how if would fit with my other items. Well, I had not buttoned it before and now that I did, I realise it fits absolutely perfectly and it is an Italian brand so the cut is really good. With regard to the color I seem to have semi- intentionally acquired a mini rust capsule and it looks absolutely fabulous with so many other items. So happy it is not a wardrobe orphan!

unfrumped

Veteran

I compromised on fit of a few knitwear items--too big- -one is an EF knit top--and was about to give them away in frustration, but tried drying them partially in the dryer (which was not recommended) and the amount of shrinkage was just enough to be very wearable and worked back into my wardrobe.

Usually it goes the other way--something really good-fitting shrinks unexpectedly even with careful handwashing or drycleaning. (Making a honest distinction between garment shrinkage and myself "growing" !)

slim cat

Veteran

I have a pretty graphic top that always felt too loose with some parts of the fabric never draping right ( it was just sitting in my hold area ).
This summer I've got black midi skirt with polka dots and needed some white graphic tops to go with it. I took my old top to dry cleaners and ask them to take in on the sides - now it goes perfectly with the skirt and both are worn frequently.

ChristelJ

Veteran

Good news about the jumpsuit!

I never wear dresses above the knee, but a high-low cotton sundress called my name last year, because the seafoam color and cute cut and cool material just seemed so perfect. The front dips up above my knees, but I found I can wear capri-length leggings with it when I go out and it's a good outfit. Now I wear it all the time, and that formula has become an option I may expand upon. Not a new formula by any means, but to me, it is.

Anonymous

My olive skort is greyer than I would've preferred, but it gets worn every week right now!

rachylou

Veteran

I bought some pants a couple of months ago that has a matching topper/utility jacket sort of thing. I went with the smaller size even tho they were a bit tight - the size up just swam on me. I don’t usually do that because it never works out. I wet the waist band and tried stretching it over a chair... and it worked!! I’m so happy! Gets me out of leggings while still being able to withstand the rough and tumble At Home life

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

I have lots of things that didn't fit when I bought them--they were "aspirational" for my body, lol. For the most part, they did eventually fit, and wearing them is all the sweeter after the wait/weight. It took me a year to get into my red flares, but I hope to be able to enjoy them much longer than that now that they fit. I'm looking forward to wearing my suede jacket this fall. It did fit when I got it 20 years ago, but didn't fit my lifestyle, and then the sleeves were too tight. We finally seem to be in a sweet spot.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

(.....or shoes weren't as comfortable as you thought they would be after you bought them....)

So fab that the pockets relaxed over time, Jenn! Such a yummy and fun piece.

This white denim jacket has silver buttons that bothered me a lot more AFTER I bought it. Fit and quality are 100%. I really wanted the buttons to be brass or gold the whole of last year, so I didn't wear it as much. This year I wear it a lot! I guess the silver grew on me

Banana Republic

Cropped Denim Jacket

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Jenn

(website)

Veteran

April and slim cat, I love when tailoring works out! It can be a gamechanger, but I've also learned that it's not always a success. Have to really think about what's going to work vs. what's just throwing good money after bad.

Star, something in it must have appealed to you! Sometimes, it's just finding the right combination.

ChristeIJ, I have made peace that there are some things in my wardrobe that I'll only wear one way and in one combination. It's not my favorite way to operate, but sometimes it's enough.

suntiger, I have images in my head sometimes of the way an item should be (ie: this exact color of olive). Sometimes that perfection doesn't exist, though, so we either "satisfice" or do without.

rachylou, this is why I hate buying jeans. I can never tell whether that "bit too tight" is the right amount too tight that's going to loosen up and be perfect or the wrong amount too tight that's going to be uncomfortable forever.

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

Fashintern, that sounds more like a plan than a compromise?

Angie, how interesting that it didn't feel like a compromise when you bought it, but you were able to move past the "second thoughts." I do know that sometimes, once we make the decision to accept something into our wardrobes and do it wholeheartedly, those niggling doubts can disappear.

JAileen

Veteran

Several years ago I bought a navy leather jacket with an in-your-face gold zipper. It did not grow on me. Instead I took a Sharpie to the zipper and pull and made it kind of disappear. The jacket was much more wearable afterwards.

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Stagiaire Fash

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True enough, it was a plan. Funny thing is, I have clear recollections of the feeling of something not being right--twitching in itchy fabric or twisting because of a poor fit or feeling conspicuous in a print--but when I try to pull the lens back to see what's causing that feeling, I just can't zoom out to see it. I guess it's been a long time since I got something I didn't feel happy in, or maybe if I do get something where one part is off, I just refuse to wear it.

I remember your concern about the jumpsuit, am glad you're comfortable with it now. I think it's really great on you.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

That jumpsuit is such a great piece for you. Glad the pockets relaxed!

Like Angie, I have a denim jacket with buttons in the "wrong" tone for me (a sort of coppery rose brass) . They worked great when my hair was blonde, but with silver hair, I like my hardware silver, and I wish those buttons played better with my hair. I still wear the jacket all the time, though. I have found I like it best with patterns that help the buttons blend into the overall outfit.

Another example would be the Comrags "tech" fabric dress I inherited second hand from my friend. The neckline is wider than I'd like but other features of the dress are so excellent that I wear it anyway. It's a real workhorse. And I either disguise or fill in the neckline (scarves, necklaces) or let it be and use it as an excuse to wear some big statement earrings.

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

The reason I asked about this was that I've been thinking a lot about that whole "satisficers vs. maximizers" thing. I think Sal was the one who originally brought it up on the forum, maybe years ago. I want to be more of a satisficer, making the best decision I can with the time and energy I'm willing to put in, and then standing by that decision without second-guessing.

Suz, those are great examples of using what you have in the way those things work best for you!

JAileen, way to make it your own!

Fashintern, I'm less interested in making things work that clearly don't, than in deciding what's an okay trade-off and then REALLY being okay with it.

Sal

Veteran

I am a satisficer - which has good and bad aspects of course. I am prepared to accept that many things in life are not perfect and to do the best I can.

The following finds are some wardrobe compromises.

The shirt dress was bought with a credit and I could have returned- but I wore it the day I got it. I then wondered if it was too much and overwhelming. I now just have to style it carefully ( rolled sleeves, open neck) and it is currently being altered to be a little shorter in length.

The white floral sheath was an item I bought under duress at a charity store. I viewed it as a $20 hospice donation. But ylf feedback and friends feedback convinced me that it really is a good piece on me and I like it a lot now styled with flats and a summer hat. It feels dated with heels.

The blue embroidered blouse was an impulse buy - it is thicker than it looks and a bit too hot for our summers. I don’t like it with blue jeans either. But on a spring day with white jeans it actually is fantastic. I try to wear this look once a week for about six weeks each spring.

I love your jumpsuit Jenn and it inspired me to get mine. Which has had good wear - probably 15-20 in a year.

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Jenn

(website)

Veteran

I was hoping you'd chime in, Sal. I find it inspiring how you add pieces, and then enjoy them for what they are. I hope to make it more of a habit to still be careful with what I choose, but also to not split every hair (splitting infinitives is fine, apparently) when making decisions.

You've reminded me of another piece that fits this category for me. This dress isn't the most conventionally flattering, and has limited seasonality for me, but I love its print and really enjoy styling and wearing it, despite its flaws. I've gotten compliments from strangers while wearing it, too!

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Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Suz, we need to swap buttons on our jackets

Jenn, odd, right? I don't know why the buttons didn't bother me - bothered me - and then didn't bother me. So moody!! Or just not sweating the small stuff at this point ......

cindysmith

Veteran

Ankle length jeans. I've found so many pairs of great jeans at consignment and thrift shops. I've bought several ankle length jeans but never figured out how to properly style them: like, what shoes go with an ankle length jean? I gave up trying to figure it out and just started wearing them tucked into my boots. They get worn a lot that way, so they wound up being great investments (especially at the prices I paid for them).

Gigi

Veteran

I agonized over the purchase of a pair of Aquatalia booties last fall. They checked all the boxes in what I was looking for in a bootie--I'd been looking for just such an animal for a few years. The problem was the fit was a little roomier than I would have liked, and the size down was just too small. So I gambled (they were full price, argh) and hoped that I would just get used to the different fit. And I did! I wore them many times last fall and winter (they are weatherproof so can handle the elements, within reason) and got lots of compliments.

I also compromised on the purchase of a fabric moto from Anthro a couple of years ago. I liked the style but did not care for the fabric, which is a bit of a washed-out black. However, I found that it made an excellent casual topper and wore it many, many times simply because it was easy and went with almost anything. It is also washable, so very practical.

I'm glad your jumpsuit turned out to work well in your wardrobe! I always love it when a gamble pays off.

Aquatalia Darianna Weatherproof Bootie

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Marrakech | Anthropologie Freeway Knit Moto Jacket

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Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

I got one!

Walking back from shopping just now, I was thinking how very useful this blouse is for me. I’m wearing it with dark jeans today, but it can also go dressy with a navy skirt or boho with my red flares. Works with those pink skinnies and my grey shorts too. When I first took it out of the box, I saw it has an elastic waistband I hadn’t noticed online. I nearly sent it back, was slow to start wearing it because it was “weird” but now I’m happy I have it.

Your posts often make me think about my clothes in ways I normally don’t. Thanks for this one.

S.Oliver BLACK LABEL ÄRMELLOS - Bluse

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nemosmom

Veteran

One pair of jeans comes to mind - a boyfriend fit pair of rigid denim. The length was awkward - WAY too short, but too long to be cropped, and the leg not wide enough for me to hack them, but I kept them anyway to wear around the house.

Fast forward about half a year when released hems hit my radar - I took a seam ripper to them and let the hem out and wore the heck out of them!

That's a great jumpsuit for you! And, thanks for the article! I suspect I am a maximizer, but long to be a satisficer

Joy

Veteran

I compromised on a tank top both on the color ( black after I’d sworn off black) and fabric ( woven polyester). But this top has had zillions of wears as a basic piece. The fabric is thick and not clingy anywhere..
Jenn, I also understand the EF pockets. I also compromised when I bought some EF silk pants at a consignment store. They are a lantern shape with those floppy front pockets, but have become summer workhorses. They feel cool and I would wear them every day. I wash them in a lingerie bag in cool water and hang to dry. They do not wrinkle or stretch out. They serve as pull on for me with a tiny bit of elastic in back but also have an invisible side zipper. The pockets are soft and do not stand out.

kkards

Veteran

I remember when i bought these boots, thinking that they’re not prefect but that they were a great price...and thinking that it was a compromise but for since I wasn’t sure about white boots, i was willing to compromise instead of continuing to search for something “perfect”...and then these became total workhorses for me.

SCHUTZ Women's ANAFLOR Mid Calf Boot,

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Jenni NZ

Veteran

You know what, Jenn, I think I am making compromises a huge amount. As you know I am trying to wear my items #30 wears, and this winter have been trying to wear tops especially that have not yet reached that number. There is nothing wrong with these tops and I like them. I don’t buy tops I don’t like. I think they just hadn’t been totally effortless to wear whereas some others were, and previously I would overlook the ones that felt like they needed more effort and just keep wearing the others.
So there has been quite a lot of “forcing myself” to wear the tops in question. But I am doing well, for example the pretty purple 2010 top has had 16 wears this year whereas only 14 from 2010-2019. I think maybe it felt a little short before but longer tops are not as fashionable as they were maybe so somehow I feel happier in it now? I always loved the colour and pattern.
And there are other similar examples.

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ophelia

Veteran

Jenni that top looks fantastic on you. I'm letting my gray hair grow out (nightmare! The rest is warm brown). I had sworn off dark colors but am now inspired to rethink that.

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

cindysmith, I feel that. Sometimes it's just figuring out how to wear something in a way that feels authentic.

Gigi, those sound like the kind of compromises I would make--where the "perfect" item might not exist, but one does that checks almost every box. I'm glad they worked out for you, especially the boots!

That's a great example, Fashintern! I've actually really liked the tops like that I've had...it's like tucking, but without having to futz with the tuck.

nemosmom, interesting! Those jeans would probably be trend at the shorter length now!

Joy, despite their weirdness, I'm always glad the EF bottoms have pockets. They're more handy than they are annoying.

kkards, yay! I've had that happen with a few trendier pieces I didn't want to spend on, too.

Jenni, you are an inspiration for enjoying what you have and the making the most of those pieces for what they are.

ophelia, good luck with the hair!

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

I think quite a lot of my wardrobe is a compromise since I go with what I find most of the time. But I do find a lot and only take/keep a certain amount for myself, so within that compromise I am a maximizer? No specific examples come to mind right now.

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

shevia, do you satisfice or maximize in other areas? I realized I was a maximizer (and it was a problem) when we went camping and, after we set up at our site and walked around the campground, I found I had a running list in my head of all the other, better sites we could have gotten. It actually comes up a lot for me when planning travel, but I'm trying to break the habit in as many places as I find it.

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