I am honestly speechless. You wonderful ladies have given me such detailed, rich, valuable advice that I don't know where to begin in expressing how I have taken in each word!
Laura, Alasse (sorry for lack of accent over e!), Gracie, K, Aziraphale, Claire and Goldenpig - every specific example of what colours you prefer to what denim was extremely useful, I can picture the various mentioned combos in my mind's eye. For example I had not thought of mint with black, it sounds lovely. I also liked knowing which you don't prefer. Azipharale, it's a revelation that black jeans were made for blue tops - makes so much sense and I don't know why I was missing this.
Claire, Amy, Peri and K thanks for pointing out that this may a be personal/regional prejudice. I'm not sure who I'm trying to impress as I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem here - Australia is a pretty casual society in general, and most things seem accepted where I am; I guess it's an inner need for harmony and beauty and the satisfaction of getting it right that influences me.
Gaylene and Laura, such common sense you have in pointing out that it is how the individual wears it that matters. That is what separates it from the vibe of ordinariness that can happen, as you say, when black bottoms are worn because it's all a person has.
Aziraphale, you are not in a hole at all - I had to choose between awarding you Wisdom or Comedy, you gave me both! The reason I took the comment to heart (and I know it was from something you've read) was I have followed similar rules in the past and only recently loosened them up a bit. I gave up black altogether in my late teens/early twenties. Mostly because of colour associations and finding it overly safe. But when I heard that Trinny and Susannah said brown leather looked more expensive than black, I felt a revelation. Black could be impersonal and unimaginative and seemed to show it in my wardrobe; my black things *had* often looked cheap; ironing made them shiny; blacks clashed; they showed lint, hair and (ugh) dandruff; they looked like part of a work uniform. I think I read something there about not pairing blacks with brights - at the time they wrote, that was a dated look (now it's 80s/90s chic!). I became even more anti-black than before.
Reading YLF and other style blogs, I had a poison eye for black-as-neutral, especially in contrasty outfits. But my eye has adjusted and I now see absolutely beautiful outfits using black. (Intentionally, of course. I still think unintentional black looks like an upmarket fast food chain uniform, especially with a plain bright t-shirt). Thanks to YLF I undertook experiments like wearing a persimmon-and-white striped tee tucked into a thrifted flirty black skirt, with silver shoes, and was surprised by the freshness of the look - much fresher than if I'd avoided black.
Aziraphale, your associations are so true! I love your sensitivity to these things. I too have a tarot reader association about purple (I am wearing a purple cardi today but it is in a decidedly non-herbal fabrication, cut, and arguably, shade!). I also don't want to portray Goth, especially half-arsed Goth that I would come across as! But I'm with natalie, I don't at all mind looking like a bumblebee or a jack-o-lantern!
Suz, Goldenpig, Lyn D, Gaylene, Claire, thankyou so much for the prod to get out there and try, try on. Today I did pop into a couple of shops and had a look around. They were just local boutiques so not denim specialists, although they each had some denim. The first lady showed me some "bootlegs" that looked like skinny straights, and said it would be impossible to get non-skinnies in a dark wash as the designers are purposely going for detailing (i.e. whiskering). She claimed that was more flattering, also claimed embellished, small pockets would make my bum look good. Thankfully I wasn't swayed.
The second shop was a fantastic, no pressure mixed brand indie boutique. I didn't find any jeans I'd like but did grab a bunch of pants/trousers (this is also a big deal for me as I haven't worn those for years either), plus a few other things. I kind of failed and won I did not make any headway with jeans, but I DID come away with an incredible black-denim DRESS, and a pair of black, overlapped/slanted-hemmed, ankle cropped PANTS! I just broke a bunch of figure flattery/style rules in one go! And you know what? I am wearing them now. Even though they will need a waistband alteration, even though they do not elongate my legline, even though I will have to figure out what tops to wear with them, and even though they aren't quite casual enough to fill the "jeans" wardrobe hole, I feel fantastic in them and I can't stop smiling! I look fab!
