Our own worst critics - WIW - YouLookFab Forum

Hi everyone, I've been enjoying all of the posts lately and have been reading some other fashion blogs this week looking for inspiration, and just kind of fascinated by the blog world in general. I've only just figured out that a lot of YLF members have their own sites....hello! Love them.

I have roped my son into taking photos. He's learning about his camera and lighting and slowing down to take good shots (we have a way to go) and, boy, I'm learning a lot about what I wore by doing this much more regularly. It's so hard to not see only the negative -- it is actually really kind of sad that I go to the criticism immediately - hate my hair, feel old, wow, that outfit just doesn't fit, etc.... I am guessing others feel the same way, but I also think that taking - and looking at -- a lot of WIW's is a very good way to desensitize ourselves to only seeing negative elements and focusing on improvement and what is already good. (You guys don't need to say nice stuff....I'm just sharing!)

I'm surprised that I just never am put together as much as I think I was! I was really pretty happy about a few of the things I've worn lately, but after seeing the photos, not so much.

I just think I really need Angie to come East and sort me out once and for all!

One other thing - I've been buying a lot lately, and it is making me nervous. I was never ever ever ever a shopper, primarily due to being overweight in my teens and twenties, and it is only since YLF that I've become quite a consumer.....I'm not sure if I like the trajectory I'm on! I need to really refine what I am wearing, and more photos is going to be so helpful.

Ok, enough of that.

I was out and about on the East Coast this week - NYC on tuesday, DC and Rockville, MD on Wed, and Richmond today, for meetings. Had 2 colleagues in from California (both guys -- too much eating, always eating. Does it ever end?!) so I am really beat from trains and cars and being in charge.

WIW :

Wednesday to local meetings in DC. I liked this outfit, and in some of the photos it looks like what I thought it looked like, but in the out door photos, I just want to get rid of everything in the outfit!
- Loft trouser jeans (who was talking about trouser jeans the other day?! Look at AT or Loft, maybe they still have them)
-Loft layered top
-Chicos jacket
-H&M black and white bag that I am using for a computer bag - LOVE it -- getting a ton of use out of it.
-(Inside photo - Furla bag)
-black loafers

Thursday -- to Richmond -- 240 miles driving round trip - stuck in traffic on way home.
My hem is hanging - didn't realize that till looking at the pics.
I don't love the skirt length and the boots, which are new and I was so excited to take them out for the first time.

Suit - AT
Boots - Frye
Bag - Furla

Danny set up his lights the other night to do a video I needed for work (another very very educational exercise - I never stop moving my hands when I talk!) Then he snapped a few pictures.

Blazer - I forget, possibly Caslon
Jeans - Paige Hidden Hills
Purse - Kate Spade

Thanks for looking and reading!

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13 years ago

sinead

Active Member

You (and your son) have a done wonderful job here. I really like all these- I was worried at first the clothes in the first photo were too big, but I think that was just the angle it caught you. IKWM about the buying spree after joining YLF- hard to resist all the lovely clothes. Thanks for posting!

kellygirl

Veteran

First of all, you are gorgeous! You look stylish, polished and poised. I think you make a great point about how WIW's help us look at the positive (it also helps to have a great supportive audience! I find the feedback invaluable--pointing out the good and the not so good.) Like you, I have had more than my share of surprises after looking at an outfit that I thought worked--although I beg to differ with you because yours look great! You have a high bar set in that mind of yours!

Ginkgo

My favorites are 3 and 5, and I like the proportions of the suit and boots, and the your use of neutrals with the colorful bags (which have me drooling). Yeah, I know what you mean about the spending spiking after finding YLF, have just recently succeeded in reeling myself in.

Maybe your style frazzle is related to the long snowy winter that has so many other fabbers down, and you need a warm vacation!

4babiesMe

#5 is my favorote, but all are great. And you're right about us being our own worst critics. Even more reason to post here.

Hil

(website)

It is interesting - this WIW process. I am actually hating seeing myself in pics less and less and starting to pick apart my outfits a little more.

I think that you look very put together in your outfits and I love the pants combos! Great job! And cool photos!

rute

Hi!!
You are very stylish also! You coud have your own blog! Love 1 and 3!!

Ingunn

I think you're doing a great job here! your style seem to be very modern classic, which I love myself, too. Great bags and boots, and the suit is really pretty on you. I also love #5 a lot.

Anonymous

Oh, you look a lot like Kate Middleton -- I love your eyes. I think you are being too hard on yourself!

U think your outfits aren't horrible at all. I like the skirt suit, I think you just need to tie in the black of the boots to your upper half somewhere more strongly since your hair is lighter.

I agree 1 looks almost like the clothes are too big, but the other pics don't show that.

I think all I would change in #1 is a little less volume on top. Other than that I do think you are being hard on yourself, but you are right; taking pics of our outfits is a great way to assess them. I love #3 and #5, and you have a fabulous figure! Love your classic vibe. Keep up the good work

Beth Ann

Another big thumbs up for #3 and #5. Yes, it takes some time to get used to seeing ourselves through the camera, instead of the mirror, but neither mode tells the whole truth! I see a woman will lovely, defined features, thick, luxurious hair and long, slender build.

Most of us are drawn to YLF because we're ready to make some changes, and we often purchase more in the initial stages because of this. At first, I found myself trying new (to me) trends like leggings and pattern mixing. Some of these were hits and some were misses. As I continued on, I began defining my own style persona and goals, using style descriptors and a style rubric to help. I found my shopping became more focused, and the money was better spent. While I'm still no fashion maven, this winter, for the first time, I've found my closet mostly "works," with items mixing together well, fits improved, and the overall effect much more a reflection of me at my best. This summer, I have much fewer "needs" and more focused "wants." Now it's much easier to budget money and be frugal, if need be.

Do you have any style goals for yourself this year? What is it that makes you unsatisfied with the outfits you're photographing?

Tina.b

What a great collection of outfits, I especially love #3 and #5! I think we can see the little tweaks required when we take the photos and anaylse them. Some good suggestions above. Great modern classic style!

Jenava

First, you do not look old at all! You have are beautiful!!

In #1, my first impression is that you are being swallowed up by volume. I think you need either a more fitted top or you need to half-tuck the top, and you need a slimmer jacket (maybe a moto style?). But, your jeans are PPL, which is good! I am concerned they may be too big for you because they do look a bit baggy in the crotch area in #1?

#2, is the jacket too big? How is the shoulder fit? It looks to be falling off the should a tiny bit. In general, this is a very conservative look, which doesn't "jive" with your casual style in #1/2 and #5. I think for this I'd like to see more leg with a classic pump, sheer black hose, and dressier accessories, since it is a very conservative look - maybe patent pumps and a smooth leather bag with a chain strap or something. These boots and the bag are fab, but on the casual side, while the suit is very conservative.

#3 is perfect! Love the proporations, the colors, the striped blazer. It all looks amazing and so does the lighting, so kudos to you son!

ironkurtin

I think you look lovely. And props to your son!

Suz

Oh, the learning we do with WIW posts! It is truly amazing. I think you'll find that as you continue you'll start to feel less self-critical and more accepting of yourself, and you will also refine your style as you go. I could have written what Beth Ann said. In the beginning, I bought a lot (often on thrift or consignment) and I also tossed a lot and I tried things that I later didn't like, and worried a bit about wasting money...but over time I began to see patterns emerge and I learned what I deeply like and what I am aiming towards, and how to mesh that with my actual lifestyle. Of course I still have a ways to go.

I especially love #5 - that's a great modern classic outfit!

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