More thoughts on the new "do" and WIW: J. Crew silk skirt - YouLookFab Forum

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More thoughts on the new "do" and WIW: J. Crew silk skirt

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I have lots to say about this change already and no doubt will have plenty more once I'm able to experiment a bit with a camera. DD still has ours at school and with no full length mirror at home, I am limited in what I can see, let alone what I can say with any authority!

However, I did go shopping today simply to try different items on and compare, and I also photographed what I'm wearing.

So far reactions to my hair have ranged from positive to...hmmm...not sure what to call it? Polite shock?

Mr. Suz, my daughter, my step-son, step daughter-in-law, and her daughter have given cut and colour a big thumbs up. This past weekend, I was working in Montreal and visiting family there. My stepson loyally said that I fit right in with the high fashion crowd of the city. Sure enough, on our first evening out, I saw two others in our restaurant wearing super short pixies!

Friends have been less enthusiastic. I saw some for a birthday event yesterday and they ignored it at first and when I mentioned it, they politely said it looks good.

I do think it's a little shorter than ideal, but it will grow, and of course I needed it that short to cut out as much of blonde as I could on the first go. There is still some "champagne" at the top. Sides and back are much bluer grey with more charcoal and silvery white. I think I'll love the colour when it fully comes in.

Meanwhile, to compensate for the shortness of the cut, I suspect it will be important to dress in a more feminine way for a while. Today's outfit incorporates a silk skirt from J. Crew. I have fully tucked the top. I know I'm a bit short waisted, last year when I tucked into a full skirt that I was trying a full skirt from Club Monaco several forum members pointed out that tucking wasn't my best look. I hope it works in this case. The skirt goes to my true waist -- haven't had one of those for a while!

These pics give some idea of my overall look now...I tried to adjust the colour to make up for the horrid store lights.

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Thomas Mason® for J.Crew tuxedo shirt in blue

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Collection A-line skirt in nightfall freesia

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General

42 replies

Latest reply was from Anna

Tanya

Veteran

I think that you look great with the new hairstyle and your friends will get used to it. Sometimes people tend not to like something what they think would not look good on their own selves and it has nothing to do how it looks on others.
The skirt looks great on you and I love how you styled it. You don't look short-waisted to me at all. Inspired by you, I have ordered the same skirt this weekend during Memorial day sales and hope it will work out. If it does, I can repeat your exact outfit minus the shoes. We can have a virtual party together styling the skirt

Elle

Veteran

Your new cut and the color look wonderful. I know it's hard to get a tepid response to a new look (i've had that too) but I think people are often uncomfortable and even a bit threatened by change in others. So it really is them and not you.

Great outfit! Very flattering.

Thirkellgirl

Veteran

I think you look beautiful! I like the blue (it's sort of periwinkle, isn't it?) with your hair, in particular. I think that *I will like your hair a little more when the bangs are *very slightly longer (and I know how very much you care about what *I think is your perfect bang-length) , but I think you look wonderful, and if you've read any of my forum posts you know I don't blow smoke, babe.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I just LOVE the colour of your pixie, Suz. It's sublime. As for the length -so not a biggie as you mentioned. It's already grown, and looks even better! And in a month you'll feel right on track. Then you can manipulate the longer and shorter bits just as you like. Grow a little more in certain sections, and keep cutting the rest. POWER.

I love that skirt too. And blue is indeed your super power colour. I don't see short waisted either. The skirt would look good with my tops, which I see they have restocked TWICE this season (and the reason I have three of them). They are winners deluxe. The tucked tux shirt looks fun too.

I'm thrilled that the most important people in your life are fully supportive of your hair evolution. YLF relayed a beautiful gushing tone too. The rest can jump in the ocean! (Friends can be tricky with change for a myriad of reasons, I've noticed. It is what it is. We love it. Rock on).

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Shrunken Mock Neck Sweater

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Ledonna N.

Veteran

Yes you look amazing. I'm not just saying that. Your cut stands out in a great way. I think it is perfect for your face shape. I also think your friends will be ok. Lol I understand about the overtly female thing.

When first chanel my hair I felt like I had to be more fem. When you are comfortable with self it will be easier.

RoseandJoan

Veteran

Suz, you look beautiful.

I think your friends responses may represent the fear many women have of short hair and going grey. You are a positive example Suz of how feminine and soft short grey hair can be.

Maneera

(website)

Veteran

I have to agree with your stepson....you do look like you belong with high fashion crowd with your super short pixie, pretty features and gorgeous smile. If I saw you on a street, I'd think you work in the fashion industry because you're so cued into what works for you (and I'm being 100% honest here).

I'm glad the important ppl in your life love your hair. Regarding Friends....I'm sure some may not be forthcoming with compliments because your bold move to chop off and go natural has made them question their own choices and they want to *stubbornly* believe that coloring their hair to somehow preserve their 'youth' is the *right* way. By not acknowledging your hair, they're trying to simply not think of what it means for them....and that's ok. But believe me when I say, the change is drastic and definitely positive....don't you have ANY doubts there, Missy.

Blue definitely is YOUR color, Suz. You look simply radiant here. I like the idea of dressing a little more feminine until the pixie grows out a bit. Also - pretty earrings. Add those!

Anonymous

May I free-associate here?

1. your hair: it looks terrific, is well cut, and absolutely suits your face and build; we all know dramatic changes freak people out, and let's face it: a lot of women are scared to death of super short hair and have been "trained" over the years to regard it as something weird. Also - and this is going way out there, but I know from experience that super short hair like this triggers questions in people's minds regarding it's intent. Or reason, or cause. Leaving it at that.

2. more on your hair - you now have statement hair. You might find that wearing higher contrast colours (black! - yes, I know, you don't like it, but still....) creates more of a statement look that goes with your hair, and creates that intentional overall look.

3. which can segue into colour and statement looking clothes.....I know what you mean about dressing with more femininity with super short hair, but the flip side is using it as a backdrop to a sophisticated (there's that word again), striking look that plays up the angularity, spareness,, and silver grey colouring. I can absolutely see you in an arty-er, architectural look (like Accidental Icon's for example) with some fantastic modern, fluid silver jewellery.

4. this is a pretty skirt and tucking in the shirt is not a problem proportion-wise to my little critical eye (lol). I wouldn't mind seeing it with a higher contrast or darker top ......

Ok - I've written all of this without looking at any other comments - mostly because I had the screen open right when you posted and no-one was here yet .....but I had to go and shower and get ready for the second half of the day while composing my thoughts. I hope I haven't spoken out of turn here and thrown out comments or opinions that weren't asked for - but I actually feel for once that I can comment effectively on this because I "get" this look

Sorry for the instructional manual - do with it what you will You are beautiful - and your friends are odd .

eta: what is up with not owning a full-length mirror????

and : chuckling at you taking iPhone pictures like the rest of us have to

Maneera

(website)

Veteran

Btw Jaime Lee Curtis looks totally gorgeous in navy too. And white! And grey! I think you should try those colors close to your face

(Just reminding you that I'm color blind and cannot see skin tone and undertone AT all. My apologies if your skin tone doesn't match hers at all!)

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Gaylene

Veteran

I think your pixie is perfect! But I know what you mean about the reaction from friends who are nonplussed at the change in your appearance. It took several months before my friends got used to seeing me with curly hair instead of a sleek bob. I put it down to the dissonance of not looking like the image of "Suz" lodged in their minds.

It's also interesting how a change at the top of our heads can trickle down all the way to our feet. Make-up, accessories, tops, proportions, silhouettes, color palette, footwear--sometimes it seemed everything needed tweaking or adjusting! It's almost like I had to throw out the book of "rules" I had built up and start over. All I can say is to embrace the madness and have fun re-discovering the pixie-cut persona who lurked in the shadows these past years.

Truthfully, while flattering and very pretty, I'm not sure the tucked shirt/full skirt phase is going to be a keeper because it reads a bit too conservative to me for the dynamic powerhouse I met a few months ago. I think your stepson's comment about seeing you with a cool, Montreal vibe is worth pondering. This pixie has unleashed something and I can't wait to see where it takes you.

rachylou

Veteran

If you couldn't tuck before, you certainly can now! And I think any off reaction is more to do with length than color because you have been since I've known you pretty and polished and have added tough for balance. Now, you're adding soft for balance. It's a new world order! Lol.

Jen W

I think your new cut and color are both pretty and powerful. I think that stepping free of society's expectations about what is feminine connotes a lot of personal power. When that stepping free is also incredibly lovely, it can be confusing for others. I'm so excited and inspired by your choices. I've been growing out my grey for 4 months and seeing you so gorgeous has me more happily going through this awkward growth stage.

Gail

Veteran

Hair is fabulous. I used to have my hair super short when I was in my 20's and have had it short a few times since then. Wonder if I can have the courage to go back to it. I think the outfit is lovely but I would prefer a darker top as I think that would make it striking with your new hair.

Staysfit

Veteran

I so love your hair! I think this skirt and top look divine together on you. It all comes together perfectly and creates a look that fits what I imagine your personality is like in real life. I love the twinkle in your eye. It truly comes through now.

Do your friends color their hair? Are you typically the trendsetter among your friends? If not than it may take them a while to adjust their eye. In any case, I hope that going grey is for you and not them.

catgirl

Veteran

I have seen you in person, so I am 100% certain this is gorgeous on you, Suz. It's a strong statement cut so some folks are going to react to that fact alone. And I have found some - though very few - people who feel like me growing my grey out is a subtle challenge or putdown of their own different choices, (though it's not my message at all) and get defensive.

I like your skirt!

Marley

Veteran

Suz - I've been absent from the forum for several weeks now, but just logged in and clicked on this thread - and WOW - I really really really think you look great! And - you are so BRAVE - going so short with your hair. Not too many people can pull that off - and you do it beautifully! I agree with you that it's important to dress just a bit more feminine - but you know, you have such a feminine face that it probably isn't necessary. I'm going to enjoy watching your process as your hair grows a little longer and you play with the style. Nice!

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

Dearest Suz - I big "chop" like you've just undertaken can be a shock, to you and to others. Your friends will get over it. And if they don't, well as Angie has suggested, they can go jump in the ocean. Your family and your fellow Fabbers think you look gorgeous

Love you in any and every shade of blue and this outfit perfectly illustrates that. Proportions look absolutely fine to my eye and you know I'm kinda picky about that.

Carry on with your beautiful self

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Wow, Jen, what a sweet thing to say! Thank you! If I can give anyone more courage to go this route, I am extremely pleased.

Rachy, I think you may be correct about the length; as Lisa suggested, people question the intent when a woman goes super short (or maybe wonder if she just had chemo!) and this is a bit more of a statement. I have in fact worn hair this short before, but not for some time, and when it was this short it was red or blonde. Grey is a bit different again. You're right, too, that it involves a recalibration of the whole shebang.

Gaylene, so true -- people have their own ideas, for sure. And I hear you on the tucked shirt/ skirt -- I understand how it might feel a bit conservative for my personality and perhaps it is. But I've been tired of my pencil skirts and wanted something more breezy. I'm glad, actually, for the "stronger" hair because it helps reduce the saccharine in this type of look. Or offers some kind of juxtaposition to it. Or something, LOL! It definitely won't be a FFB; I see it as an alternative look for summer days. A full skirt like this is easy to wear at home, another plus.

Maneera -- thank you! I am already experimenting with navy and white close to my face and since they are staples for me, I'll continue to do so. When I can, I will show some photos. I actually tried a navy and white dress on today and have some shots. I also think you might be right about my friends. The birthday in question was a 60th but the friend would not tell us the number. I was the second youngest woman in the group -- the youngest was in her late 40s and I and one other were in our 50s and the others were up to mid-60s and every one of these women dyes her hair. Mostly in cool colours like cranberry, along with the blonde, mind you. But not a natural head in the bunch, and I guess I surprised them.

Lisa, you're totally right, as always -- people do freak out about big changes. And even though this doesn't feel like a huge change to me, it represents a big one to others. Totally agree on statement colours and clothing -- I have been experimenting and will report more on that in another post. I also think I'll be veering a bit more towards strong simple shapes, less pattern overall, and simple lines. I'd love to think of myself as arty architectural but it may be a bit of a stretch, still -- I often love this in theory but it tends to overwhelm me physically. So it will be aiming for "arty architectural lite," if you will -- with some of my preppy modern classics thrown in to keep things real. It's going to be a fun style shift for sure. Maybe I need you and Gaylene to come style me. I should take a western Canada shopping trip... I definitely need your shopping help for some great silver jewellery and am all ears to suggestions!!!

No full length mirror because we made some changes to our guest room (where it was) and still haven't purchased one in the right size for our bedroom. We have very little wall space. But we're working on it.

Jules, thank you so very much. Your opinion means a lot.

Ledonna, thank you so much for chiming in. You of all people "get" this about the length because you also wear yours in a style that isn't conventionally "girly." Thank you for your insights.

Angie, thank you so much for your personal support and for the forum, where I feel like I can come to learn more as I go and get so much encouragement! Love those tops, too -- they are sold out in my size and probably too warm for our summers, but I will keep my eye open for something similar for the fall.

And yes, I'll keep experimenting with the length. In the past when I've had super short pixies, my bangs have been a piece-y and a bit longer (not super long) and I've had piece-y bits at the sides, which looks very feminine. I am LOVING the easy care of this....it was easy to look after before but now it is just unbelievable!!

Thirkelgirl, thank you. You're right it is like a periwinkle blue, a bit lavendar-like, and you can see from what I said to Angie that I'm thinking along the same lines for the future cut. It might take a while to get there because my first priority is to get the blonde dye out so it will stay short until that's all gone. I can live with the length but want to get clear on the colour.

Elle, thank you so much. Such wisdom.

And Tanya, thank you! You are going to look amazing in this skirt and we'll have fun styling it together!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Aww, Shannon, you are one of my greying-pixie icons as you know -- not that you have the pixie any more but you know what I am saying! You've been a big inspiration. I appreciate the support and you are right.

Marley!! So great to see you pop in, and wow, thank you! This means a lot coming from you. I was ready for a big change and am happy that I jumped in. Now show us some of your own fab outfits and what your hair is up to these days!

Una, thank you so much. I think it's true what you say; sometimes people take it as a criticism when it is not. Funny how that works.

Staysfit, you are another natural pixie icon on the forum! You make it look so feminine that I knew I had to try. You ask some very good questions. I don't usually think of myself as the trendsetter among my artist friends, but I do have a very different style to theirs -- much more "sophisticated" now that I think of it. Good to ponder. They are boho, or super whackadoodle, or rocker chic. I am more classic in my style.

Gail, thanks -- I will also try with a darker top. I wore a darker one with the skirt the other day, actually, but wanted to try this for a change. Psst...go for the cut (if you want!)

skylurker

Veteran

When I started turning grey, the older women in my family who all dye their hair were fierce critics and pressured me to colour them - which I didn't - and now, they've adjusted and say grey hair suits me! I'm so glad I didn't listen to them.

Your hair turned such a beautiful shade of silver, it would be a shame to cover them.

Chris987

Veteran

This outfit is really beautiful - color, proportions/shape, fit, even the rolling the sleeves a bit. And your hair is gorgeous! Funny how some people will like it, some will say nothing leaving you wonder what they think, and some may not like it. Some people have very emotional reactions to the subject of grey vs. colored hair as we age. Give your friends a little time, perhaps they will start to like it, but even if they don't (or feel defensive/put down) if you love it then it's good!

I think most of us here on YLF believe in or want to believe in a philosophy of wearing what makes you feel good and that includes hair...and if others don't like it then ok but not a reason to change it. You are setting a great example for us with your very daring short cut and saying no to continued coloring:-)

Also a note on silver jewelry....LisaP posted a dragonfly necklace recently...these finds are a couple of similar ones. I'm not sure which one is the exact one she posted. I saw more of the brand in a boutique in Boston recently and was totally blown away. The prices are a bit high for me for an impulse buy, but I'm seriously thinking of getting something from this line. If this appeals to you, they have an online site and they are also available at Lord & Taylor in the U.S. and Hudson's Bay in Canada.

http://www.unode50.com/us/?

UNO DE 50 Circulating Necklace

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Anonymous

Your haircut you're fine Suz
Your dress is beautiful and I love the blue blouse and skirt set that is simply beautiful.
To think that some people have to go above and feel good oneself that is what is important in life

Astrid

Veteran

I think you look great, but I can understand why feedback has been mixed. This is a big change! Because of the length of course, but also because of the color. I think you look fantastic and your hair looks awesome, but you do look different. There's more of a difference compared to previous haircuts. I think people just have to get used to it. I think the outfit works fine, but it seems quite conservative for you - I agree with Gaylene here. I can't wait to see how your new hair is going to influence your style going forwards.

JAileen

Veteran

Some people don't like change. As others have said your hair might be too short for some. You really look fab, though. After I went grey my MIL and SIL didn't say anything about the change. They must have noticed, because my hair had been kind of chestnut brown, so big difference. Well, they didn't like it! And said so! I was kind of taken aback. My SIL is a tiny bit older and I think it reminded her of her age. She highlights her hair blonde. It doesn't look bad at all, but very common for our age group. Hair as grey as mine is less common.

Anonymous

When I cut all my hair off in my twenties, the strongest reaction was from men (older men) who basically told me I was less attractive. I was pretty shocked that anybody would say that to me, and also shocked that my attractiveness hinged on the length of my hair.

Women didn't say anything.

I'm still a little shocked that women would be anti-short hair or anti-grey because both these things are soooo practical, so sensible on so many levels, I really dont get it.

Anyway, I think the ultra short pixie is great on you, I think you made the right decision, and now you get to figure out some new styles. Win, win, win!

Sihaya

Veteran

Suz, your new hair, simply put, ROCKS. Don't believe anything else you hear.

Sal

Veteran

I do sympathise with the feeling - I have changed my hair up a few times (cut and colour) and had varying reactions. And choosing to be a natural platinum grey is a choice some people just don't understand.

You do look wonderful and it will be interesting to see where your style settles as time goes on.

Last year some friends and I took a day off and took part in a Fine Homes tour - viewing homes that are open to raise money for charity. Of course we stopped for lunch along the way, and there were lots of others doing the same at the cafe. We were all dressed well but were totally impressed by this elegant edgy woman with a silver pixie cut, a white, silver and grey outfit (an asymmetric silver and white sweater, with dove grey jeans) and silver shoes. She was chic, funky, and modern.

Anonymous

Just having some fun with your skirt here....and I don't want to hear any " I have to walk 10 km in my shoes everyday and blah blah blah". Once in awhile we can wear heels

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Vix

Veteran

Hi Suz --

I haven't had a chance to compliment you yet on leaping bolding into the grey, but the cut and color look great!

I personally think any weird reactions are due to the COLOR -- you've had very very short hair for ages now and I know short haired folks here spend lots of time calibrating tiny shifts in looks and length but to those with long-ER hair, short is short. Yours looks very chic now, as it did (will) a bit longer. After all, when the average short-haired man gets a cut -- even to buzz -- we might register it but we're hardly grasping at pearls!

[Ditto for women with longer hair who think they've gone short when a cut dusts their shoulders. I say this as one who's had both a Clooney (not my best look) and near-butt-length hair (ditto) and lots in-between!]

Big shifts in color and length, though, ARE kind of shocking. Throw in the o my gooood she's stopped coloring and you've just given yourself and others something to chew on!

I'll be interested to see where the new original recipe hair color takes you.

Personally given how picky you *generally* are about what colors you wear, and given that you were dying a fairly light shade so don't need to tweak much for contrast/color combos, I don't see why a huge shift would be necessary unless it were for style. I have a feeling some of the camel-y/caramel shades that weren't the best for your skintone but echoed your hair might be out, but other than that...?

Anyway, congrats on what I know is a big decision -- I think you'll love the freedom and seeing your own gorgeous hair colors out and about! Glad you have support on the homefront.

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