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Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

Maybe I have my focus all wrong

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

I LOVE shoes, interesting, edgy shoes. But today I wondered if I have been mistaken in my fashion love.
For lunch I had dim sum with an old college friend. Tonight I had dinner at the bar of a local seafood restaurant. Last night at the Scotch tasting we were sitting around tables.
A huge portion of my social life is around eating and drinking. Activities where you are seen waist up. In those circumstances, one's shoes are not noticed, at all.
Should I just focus on interesting toppers? This would require a major refocus on my part.

Dressing

34 replies

Latest reply was from PamelaK

Mo

(website)

Veteran

I think you also have interesting toppers. And people do see your shoes, even inside. But I hear what you're saying. I'm starting to question my quest for super walkable shoes. I'm going to have a car here soon (yes, it's true - someday we'll buy that replacement Subaru!) and will also be back home to my 'normal' life by the end of the year. I tend to zero in on a focus.

L'Abeille

Veteran

No, don't change a thing. Shoes are the bomb. As has been said a lot recently here, shoes are the quickest way to make an outfit look really current. They will definitely be noticed, you can't stay seated forever. And they make you stand and walk differently so you will feel different even when no-one can see them.

I would think, with your "directional" style (is that the right word? Where you are everyone else will aim to be 6 months from now, but you'll be long gone) that shoes is the easiest way to stay ahead of the trends--and the easiest item to find for such. Besides, with your lifestyle and your sense of style--if you showed up in scrubs and awesome shoes, you would make it look intentional.

(from a chicken-hearted admirer of your style sense and boldness)

Suz

(website)

Veteran

No...your focus isn't wrong.

You get to have more than one.

cciele

Veteran

My thought is also "no." But Suz has a good point!

Although people can't see your shoes when you are sitting, they definitely notice when you are walking/standing. I think it takes just a quick glance at the shoes to make an impression. Out of all the items I wear, it's my shoes that always get the most comments (comparable to the number of comments I get on my hair)!

Vildy

Veteran

I am probably the outlier here, especially on a forum where people perfect their skills at putting together all the elements of great outfits as well as finding and honing their unique styles, (and me, too, even though I don't post pix) but I strongly believe in focusing on the face, what I'm saying to them, how I'm reacting to them. I have to balance this with my liking the whole aesthetic of clothing but it's the old saw of whether people are complimenting the clothing or the woman inside the clothing. I want to hear that I look great and would rather not hear about how they like some piece of my outfit or even my "look."
So, yeah, I am always thinking about dressing as ultimately a portrait kind of thing. What they used to call restaurant dressing. Looking good across the table because your clothes frame you.

Greyscale

Veteran

Shoes are the first thing I notice about someone's outfit. Always have. I like shoes. Since you like shoes too, keep it up.

Catnip

Veteran

Should shoes be your focus? Since you love them, yes!

Many years from now, you will possibly have "problem" feet and will have to wear flat, boring shoes, as I have to. So don't pass up the opportunity now, while you can, to wear whatever you want to, including shoes.

Neel

Veteran

Girl ..... What makes you think YOUR shoes go unnoticed?!!!! I am thinking you turn heads with them everywhere you go! Please don't change a thing!

Although a few more killer toppers wont hurt either

rachylou

Veteran

I love your shoes, but now that you put the question to it... I think you might actually get more mileage out of tops...

But your shoes are awesome.

Debbie

Veteran

To me your shoes are your statement piece. Wear them while you can because your feet and their tolerance might change with age.

LACeleste

Veteran

Hi Anna,

I think you should trust your instincts and wear what you love.

If your fashion love is wrong I don't want to be right or however that line goes!

I think you get the whole thing right----you know--- the gestalt thing.

Gigi

Veteran

Here's another way of looking at it. Will your *heart* be in it if you switch your focus to toppers? You said yourself that you LOVE shoes. If you love them, you should continue to focus on them. I don't know that I would switch my focus simply for practical reasons. Where's the fun in that? It would seem to make your style more utilitarian and not more fun. Remember Angie's commandment: Have fun with fashion!

rae

(website)

Veteran

You still have interesting toppers! And I think I remember a while back you decided your formula would be basics with interesting toppers and shoes, right? How can the gal with the Improvd woven leather jacket of awesomeness worry about not having interesting toppers??

JAileen

Veteran

It depends on what your aim is. Do you wear interesting, different, edgy clothes and shoes for your own self, or to be noticed, complimented, and/or admired by others?

Ornella

(website)

Veteran

Do you wear stuff to be seen in it (i.e. for others) or to feel good in it (i.e. for yourself)? That for me is the main question here.

The way I see you, you wear what you wear now because it reflects you. It's not to please the crowds. Sounds to me that shifting towards the toppers would be about the others, not you.

Besides, shoes actually do make an outfit (and appearance) to a great extent. First the hair then the shoes - those frame the person. Go wrong with any of those, and something will be off, which no amount of the content in between will correct. To my eye at least.

fuzzylogic

Veteran

I agree with Suz, et al. Have edgy shoes. And fantabulous toppers. No brainer.

lyn67

Veteran

I think shoes are very imporant to be polished and good quality, but I too was wondering what percentage get the shoes from one's overall look in these cases. Still, I I think they are noticed at a blink of an eye no matter the circumstances esp. yours as beeing mainly on the edgier side! So keep on doing!

Raisin

Veteran

Just go out dancing after your meals!

Janet

(website)

Veteran

What Suz and Cathy said. Shoes are my favorite too, and I think nothing has the power to elevate an outfit like a great shoe. (This is why I want to upgrade my summer sandals -- our hot humid summers generally defy toppers.)

Keep on rocking the shoes.

Anonymous

Definitely keep focusing on shoes, but remember this rationale and use it to justify the next awesome topper you see! Don't you also have a nice collection of edgy necklaces? It seems like those would certainly be seen when you're sitting in a restaurant.

ironkurtin

Veteran

It matters more what emotional mileage you get from an item than what other people might possibly think. One you can control and the other you cannot.

shedev

Veteran

If killer shoes make you feel killer, it will show on your face.

Carla

Veteran

Annagybe, you have great hair framing such a beautiful face. With a touch of bright lippy (the recent pink is fab, and you slay in red) all the focus IS on that beautiful face. Fab tops, and some statement necklaces are fun, but I don't think anything you wear up top is going to outshine you beautiful features.

Full body, you present so fashionably, but your artistic shoes are like an exclamation point rather than a period. I wouldn't give up on footwear, if that is your passion. Really, though, aren't your shoes more like a 'collection'? Like art?

Aziraphale

Veteran

Keep rocking the shoes. You love shoes, and that's enough of a reason. If you need a second one: yes, many other people DO notice shoes, even if you sit at a restaurant table all night.

unfrumped

Veteran

I don't think it's all or none--it's a reminder about balance.

If I'm at a dinner event and I'm wearing something as a top or topper that is a draining color or not a good neckline or whatever, then great shoes can't help that (this is a hypothetical, because I don't have great shoes for dinner events!).

It gets back to your post where at one time you thought you would focus on shoes and jackets --what is worn in between becomes kind of basic background, and while it needs to be good, and fit well, it's less memorable in a lot of ways, and so maybe not as worth huge resources or lots of duplication or variety. Or that can be the liberating thought, anyway, to put more resources toward the other items--what I call "face and feet". Where face means face and face-framing.

So jackets could be the "upper" focus for some (especially in cool weather), while for others it might be a top and statement necklace or earrings, or great colors near the face, or some combination.

Mellllls

Veteran

Most women notice shoes.

Sheila

Veteran

I don't notice shoes unless they are very bad or very good.
I did see a lady shopping the other day in a beautiful pair of black suede boots with glitter on the back of them just above the heel.
They were gorgeous !
Now with shoes and boots I have to think of comfort comfort comfort .... sadly it limits you.
I went to a formal dance in September and the ladies had all thrown off their shoes and they were all in a pile on the centre of the dancefloor. I had thought what a waist and the women were all dancing wihout their shoes. For the brief time they were seen... they were NOT see while eating ... and obviously while dancing... well - I hope there was not a HUGE investment in them.
I think ... maybe refocus... shake it up a bit ! New earrings, scarf, spectacular necklaces !! BUT if an undeniably "right" pair falls your way and is great value... well it's up to you !

catgirl

Veteran

Shoes are the way to go in my book, no matter what.

shiny

Veteran

My life also revolves a lot around eating and drinking. Perhaps you can find restaurants with high top table seating, that way your shoes will be noticed?

As for toppers, just make sure they don't compete for attention with the shoes. Also be realistic: wouldn't you just get hot and wind up taking off the topper? It's no use draped on the back of a chair!

An easier place to start might be scarves? That's my go-to strategy: scarf in a flattering color wrapped loosely around my neck.... my favorite scarf at the moment matches my lipstick.

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