Hmmmm .... Alexandra. IF I were being totally honest with myself, you would be right. I'll have to think about it today and wrap my brain around the fact that I "might" be a compulsive shopper. My reluctance is the fact that labeling myself will have implications that I will have to start working on. Wiggle room.
But truthfully, I realized on Day 8 I had to buy something or go crazy. So yes I have compulsive shopping tendencies.
Great post, Marina. It was extremely helpful. I have explored my personal shopping triggers. They include boredom; reward; and distraction. I often use shopping to distract myself when facing something unpleasant or just plain bored. I used to use buying as a means to reward myself when I achieved a certain goal. I stopped the "reward" shopping sometime ago.
Is it reasonable to say that if you have compulsive tendencies in one category, you likely have compulsive tendencies in other categories as well?
Greyscale -- You describe my pre-2017 shopping habits precisely. I was on a type of treadmill of buy and return. I eventually came to describe my behavior as bulimic shopping.
Like you, I don't have financial repercussions. It all came down to the time devoted to shopping/returning. I got so tried of the return cycle. I made the decision in 2017 that it had to stop.
I made the decision that anything that came home with me was staying (unless defective). That was step one to changing the way I thought about purchasing. I had to make my brain understand there no "easy out" any more. I'm not saying I stepped off the treadmill entirely, but I made measurable progress. This also forced me to really think about my purchases. To date, I have spent $657 less than I did at this time in 2016 and I have reclaimed a lot of my personal time. I can't say I am using that time any better though but I am trying.
Thank you, Unfrumped. I try to be honest with myself most of the time. There are always periods of self delusion, but I am usually aware of them and have "granted" myself permission for a period of time.
Jenn -- congratulations on doing well with the seasonal shop. I am transitioning to that type of shopping because my wardrobe has reached a point where seasonal shops make sense. I honestly think I will spend less and buy better too!!!!!
Hi Robin -- I agree that when I prohibit something, it usually backfires on me. Unfortunately, I am a "black and white" type of person. I am completely incapable of find that middle ground that so many well-adjusted people settle in. This is not a shopping or purchasing fast, it is really just an exercise in being mindful of how often the shopping compulsion hits me and what I do about it.
Jenni -- I read Recovering Shopaholic as well. I thought she wrote really well and presented me much food-for-thought. I was sad when she opted to go on hiatus.
I am thrilled that you are here with us on YLF and have added your voice to the Forum. You enrich all of us with your wit and wisdom (and great shoe collection.
CindySmith -- I am glad you mentioned substituting one behavior for another (possibly equally unhealthy) behavior. That is something I am acutely aware of. Anytime I change one behavior, I have to watch for changes in other areas of my life. It is an interesting balance, isn't it?
Barbara Diane -- I understand getting that hit or rush of endorphins. I am making myself do things instead of shop. We are planning one weekend vacation per month from October through November. That is one-on-one quality time with my BF.
LDB -- Thank you for introducing me to the book. I likely would not have come across it by myself. I am reading the book slowly so I read to the point of this shopping exercise. I established the fact that I am a compulsive shopper. Yes. I am admitting it now. I will pick up the book this evening and begin where I left off.
Waves at Lisa.
