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Page 2 in the conversation "lilac/camo/jewellery 4.20- plus jeans lesson" by lisa p
I hate jeans, too. I love your jacket, though. I never thought I would say that about camo. Pretty necklace. Diamonte reminds me of Bridget Jones’ mother. Whenever I’ve done something that I didn’t want to do but had to (court appearance as CASA, for example), I always found something fabulous at the thrift store. I assumed it was some kind of karma.
Ok - I really have to change my language when writing posts. I am not being hard on myself, per se; again, the whole point of the forum and posting on it is to learn lessons and figure out ways we can improve. It's not some horrible outfit - or I wouldn't have posted it. To me it's a lesson in proportion and jeans flattery. That's all ! I call it like I see it
Thank you all for the camo/lilac love. I need the juxtaposition of a more feminine top under a camo jacket to mitigate the tough vibe - it's the only way I wear this piece. I do love lilac, always have, but not worn head-to-toe in an uber feminine way. It would be fun to pick up another piece or two this summer if one appears - a blouse especially, or a purse. Lavender and lilac eye makeup is a favourite too .
I've committed today to my seasonal closet cleanout and overhaul. Spring has finally sprung, and I need to get my boots put away asap! Also going to do a full jeans review - which could be scary!
For me, looser thigh material adds 10lbs, so I must, must, wear jeans that are tight in the thigh. The only way to get a tight thigh fit while avoiding sausage casing is to go for thick jean materials. I’ve found some thick jeans at Anthro and Lucky this year.
As an aside: I have found that light wash blue jeans seem to add the most visual girth to the thighs, even more so than white jeans. I still like light wash jeans so I am ok with JFE, but if you are buying new jeans, I would start with white or dark wash (to avoid becoming demoralized in the store :-))
I love the Lilac and camo combo! To me, the jacket is an excellent length.
I actually don’t notice any stumpifying effect with the cuff. It is always shoes that are stumpifying, IMO. Sneakers are always only JFE, so if you want the BEST look, dark heel with dark wash jean is ALWAYS the way to go.
I think it’s a great challenge to get your proportions right, but so satisfying when you do because you truly look your best, and let’s face it, that is the goal most of the time!
Well, if you are avoiding looser fit jeans because of visual poundage - then I have no hope. But I actually disagree. I think the right denim, in the exact right fit, can look great in a loose cut. Perhaps it's a matter of JFE vs true flattery, but that's subjective. I do agree that dark denim is more flattering than light, but at some point, I just want to be comfortable and pulled together , and not worry about whether my thighs are looking their best. I wouldn't wear a super faded light blue denim, period, but still want to investigate a vintage look. I am intrigued by the idea that sneakers are only JFE - I never considered that, and perhaps that's true. But it also feels like comparing apples and oranges.
Ok well i think vintage straight is a good idea to try out. I do LOVE the look.
And No, heels always look better than flats for figure-flattery! (I actually don’t think we’re disagreeing on this one.)
I agree that figure-flattery is not the be-all end-all. Comfort or feeling lightness in your step when wearing a new trend —these are important too!
I think this whole outfit is plenty flattering and especially adore the necklace/jacket but definitely tweak the jeans if it’ll sing to you more.
Since my weight tipped up, I’ve been embracing the stretch jeans because they still fit, lol.
WOOOHOOO. Closet edit. My toes are ticked....
I think I'll do a separate post on the seasonal changeover and closet edit. I'm up to my neck in clothes right now .
Back to the jeans, Lisa. I know that JAG style here. It's not what you're after. Not crisp or elongating. The stretch and wide cuff *can* create the "stumpy-sausage-silhouette" you're feeling. I would feel a similar way, so I get it.
I’m following along and taking notes on all the talk about jeans. I need help!
I LOVE this. Camo and lilac, especially together, are not in my palette and thanks to you now I wish that they were. And the metallic shoes really seal the deal for me.
I also hear you on jeans. I have spent YEARS wearing JFE jeans because they were really the best pairs I could find in a style that didn't make me cringe. They weren't awful, they weren't amazing. Let's hope you find a pair that loves you back and makes your heart soar.
Have you ever tried the Levi’s Wedgie jeans? I’m on my phone and can’t make a find happen. But they might be what you’re looking for.
More love for the colours - from a non lilac lover!!
Here are three pics of me in the same jeans. The last two are five days apart, the first one maybe three weeks earlier. Interesting how the cuffs and heels and photos affect flattery - I think 3 is the most leg lengthening.
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Sorry to hog your thread:)
The outfit is really cute--love the camo with lilac and the dark wash jeans.The jeans look fine to me, but it's how you feel about it that matters! Maybe crops with just a wee bit of flare might add counter-balance?
Fascinating responses here. I'm sorry Lisa that when I read this yesterday my initial thought was annoyance that you were putting yourself down again and complaining about your post-menopausal body. I felt better when you wrote that you didn't mean to be moaning about your thighs because they are what they are and you were just looking for figure flattery improvement. Your posts are amusingly written and always get heaps of responses so we the forum obviously appreciate your writing style and comments.
For myself I have found self-acceptance to be incredibly helpful. It has taken quite some time but now that I'm 10 years past menopause ( I think I was 46 and am now 57) and the 10 kg weight gain ( 22 pounds) hasn't shifted at all I have learned to accept it and just know that I look and am older and fatter. Grey hair adds to the feeling and in a way helps to think there is just no way I will ever look like I did in the past- and to be OK with that.
This looked a cool outfit to me.
For Sal, thank you for the photos of the same jeans. They do look the most leg-lengthening in pic 3 I agree. But then comfort and fun are also important right?
Like the look you have created. You do look great in lilac. And the camo jacket adds edge We sometimes are too hard on ourselves.
Sally - thank you for sharing your 3 jeans photos. The effect in the third pic is quite dramatic - doesn't even look like the same pair of jeans.
I don't understand the push-back against photo analysis and wanting to improve how one looks. Isn't that the whole point here? As to self acceptance, well, it's a moving target for all of us. However, due to the overwhelming number of suggestions that I complain too much, I will definitely be more careful of my choice of words going forward.
Maybe it's just that you didn't actually ask for suggestions on improvement? Which is why it came across as it did? Of course improvement is one of the main points of posting here. And self-acceptance did come slowly to me over time, over a number of years and I do still mourn a little for how I used to look!
I wish I could join you on the caffeine fuelled shopping and editing followed by a celebratory glass of wine Lisa! I would watch your hockey too;)
Some of my clients like the Levis Wedgie jean, that UmmLila suggested too.
In the spirit of brainstorming Lisa p, I had another thought, actually. I wonder whether adding dressier shoes to your outfits would make you feel better about them. It might be coincidental, but I see you wear sneakers a lot - and that's VERY trendy, and comfy of course. Maybe that's where you'd like create more of a change?
Also, start a separate thread on jeans and your figure flattering priorities. I have suggestions.
Lisa I’m sorry i think maybe I am sensitive and coming from the place of once having been very critical of other people’s outfits (years ago) to a place where I now focus on the positives I realise I did miss your point. Don’t change the way you communicate :). I think this kind of open assessment is good, especially if the poster is actually asking for that kind of response xx
I think your outfit, and you, are perfect for Spring and right up my color alley. So of course I like it. It's a casual, current and pulled together. It's way more stylish than what I see around me. Even when I go to a bigger city. No edits necessary.
As far as figure flattery, a looser, full length cut would be more leg lengthening but not sure it would really look better. The cropped style looks more on trend. And, I have noticed this about skinnies. The skinny style does not photograph as well as it looks in motion. Skinnies also look great from the side and especially, the back! Have someone take a video of you moving and turning in skinnies and you will see what I mean.
Such a great outfit! You really have a gift for putting together looks that are somehow current, yet timeless!
Do you have access to the department store discount retailers where you live? I’ve had good luck at Neiman’s Last Call and Saks Off Fifth for higher quality pieces at somewhat affordable prices. Like Vince and Theory and premium denim.
Jeans are so hard, and yet solve so many outfit dilemnas once you locate the perfect pair - which you will, probably when and where you least expect it!
Angie - yes, a heel would certainly elevate the look. This was a non-work day , casual outfit worn for grocery and bookstore shopping . Yes, I do wear sneakers a lot, because it's what I have, and they bridge that short little season between boots and sandals nicely . I do know that heels are leg lengthening in photos and would certainly make this outfit look different
Ryce - good idea to check out SofFth - we do have one here which I admittedly never go to - it's in a non-shopping part of town, isolated in a new outlet mall no-one goes to . I'll make a point of swinging in there this week.
Denise - (hangs head) - I suspect you're right . I still want loose -fitting jeans though -I think I'm sick of feeling squeezed into my clothes for so long.
Deborah - no need to apologize , I have a very critical eye, and not just pointed at myself. It's critical in an analytical way, not meaning to be negative, just always looking for tweaks.
Argh, why are jeans so difficult?!
I think this is a cute outfit, and if I saw you in person, I probably wouldn't even blink at the proportions. We notice different things when a person is in motion than when looking at a photo.
That being said, I have totally taken a picture of myself in the mirror and then promptly changed shoes or pants or whatnot, because I felt like Queen Stumpylegs, so I get it. I'm sure that some of this is the photo angle, and some of it is the higher contrast between the lilac and the dark denim and some of it is the cuff and some of it is the sneakers. I wouldn't give up on these jeans, because I think you can probably mitigate one or more of those factors in styling to get them to a point where you're happier with them.
And now, I'm going over to your jeans thread, because I've gone off boyfriend jeans, which happen to be all I have left in my closet, and frankly, it's a PROBLEM.
I hear you, Lisa. I think that the problem is that this doesn't look like you . . . . maybe the pieces feel like you in theory, but then you put it on and it doesn't look like you and that is hard. For me, all of the pieces have a strong casual vibe (in an updated "trying" but not "edgy" way). I try to watch that I wear my crossover athleisure-type pieces with really updated basics . . . I love a bootcut, but a bootcut and a sweatshirt can veer into mumsy and I think you are running into that with your cuffed jeans -- they are totally wearable, but maybe not the right choice for the look you are going for here. I'd love to see the purple top paired with the olive Gap skinnies you posted a WIW with and a denim jacket with the gold necklace and sneakers. I think that the leg lengthening effect of the ankle versus cropped pants is going to make a difference. I would love to see the camo jacket with your grey anthro sweatshirt with the ruffle on the butt -- I could see that combo going well with a lightweight floral scarf with a lilac or navy background worn hanging down so you have pattern mixing but they aren't competing too much (I think camo and floral looks really fresh together). I'm not sure if the cropped cuffed jeans would be too stumpifying with the grey top (it is a bit longer, I think), but I could see them working in summer with a popover shirt or tunic of some sort and a low block-heeled sandal.
Mm - good eye, Elly, thank you!
Top Shop sells 100% or near 100% cotton straight jeans for a fairly reasonable price. I haven't tried them so I can't comment on their fit.
As to men's jeans: I'm not really big into how jeans look from the back, but I find the pockets on at least boys' jeans to be way too big and not placed to flatter from the back. IMHO boys' and men's jeans work best on women with fairly straight figures.
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