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Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

I've no right to ask for help, but

biscuitsmom

Veteran

I am panicking! I have 2, maybe 3 very different and important (2 me) events to dress for, and I haven't a frigging clue I am apple-shaped, overweight and clueless First up is meeting a lady who is practically an 'idol' of mine, at the National Dog Agility competition in 2 weeks and the 2nd is the evening wedding/reception at a very fancy hotel for the daughter of DH's longtime friend (whom I barely know, honestly.) I have a *gorgeous*( to me) high-low black velvet midi/maxi skirt I want to wear, but nothing to go with it- no top/shoes, etc I don't have much extra $ to spend on completing the outfit and have a extremely hard time fitting shoes- wide, fussy feet/narrowish heel, arthritis, etc. So heels are out I would be SUCH a shoe whore if I could only wear more! Maybe I should just stay home

Dressing

39 replies

Latest reply was from cjh

abc

Veteran

Oh biscutsmom, don't stay home! Can you go through your closet and see if there are any options you hadn't thought of before? I know when I get in panic mode I tend to overlook options that are right there in front of me.

Good luck and stay positive.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Thanks, girl.... I will look again, but you've seen first-hand what a mess I am Thanks for caring

Kim

Veteran

I'm sure your hubby's friend would rather have you come in jeans than not come at all to the celebration of his dd's marriage. I know it's hard, but I know you are smart enough to know that this is not really a crisis, and you (and we) will find something to make you feel appropriate for the wedding. Sometimes I think it's better to feel "meh" and GO to the event, than to feel "meh" and stay home. Don't let clothing get to you like that. You already have the dress! You're more than 1/2 way there! Perhaps some Birks (for that "unexpected but totally trending" look...) A pair of cute simple black ballet flats? Tone down the shoes and let the dress (and you) SHINE.

Some thrifted vintage jewelry to bump things up a bit?

I can't wait to see the finished look!

cheryl

Veteran

Do not stay home. You need to get out and have some fun. You have sent me some gorgeous items so I know you have something great in your closet. Don't be so hard on yourself. Go look in that closet and find a great top to go with that skirt or maybe some black slacks and a nice top. Hugs!

Diana

Veteran

Don't be so hard on yourself! Your skirt sounds gorgeous. Do you have a picture of it (or a product link) so we can see? I'll bet even something like a simple black shell, crisp white shirt, or shell + blazer would look great with it! And since it's an evening wedding, you could always go for all black + pops of color or some blingy jewelry.

And I am seeing more and more women wearing flats to weddings (yay happy feet!), so I don't think you need to worry about lack of heels! Ballet flats, flat sandals, etc, would all work, I think.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

I do know it's not 'really' a crisis, God knows I've been thru enough real ones to tell the difference, but it's one of the biggest challenges in yrs I've come across....the skirt is 'awesome' (to me) and has to be the main factor, and I do have some great jewelry pieces, thanks for reminding me, but the top is stumping me the most.... I can find a pair of shoes I can stand for a few hours, (I hope) even if I need to donate them afterwards...... thanks!

milehighstyle (Linda)

Veteran

I think you can wear a non dressy top with the skirt you are describing, something very simple like a white blouse or tee and the skirt would dress it up. Doesn't have to be white, though, just a thought. Maybe add a necklace or big earrings if that's your liking. I also don't think heels are necessary, just something polished enough to look a bit dressed up. No, you should not stay home. These events are important to you. Go and have a great time!

TraceyLiz65

(website)

Veteran

I so know THAT feeling!!!! I put my DH through so much anxiety every time something came up when I was in that state... I deeply regret it....

If you are starting with a black skirt , there has to be something workable for it in your closet... I hope you can give another look and find something that turns this around for you! You CAN DO THIS! and in the end it will be good for you!!!!

TraceyLiz65

(website)

Veteran

PS... You don't have to earn the right to ask for guidance here... You do deserve it!

LACeleste

Veteran

I am sure we will all help you!

When I get a sense of where you are going with outfit direction, I am sure I can give you some awesome accessories that shamefully never get worn. My fancy capsule is overflowing. It would be a huge favor to me (and my hus who shares the closet hehehehe)

At work so brief but I will tune back in soon.

This is going to be fun!

carter

Veteran

Go play in your closet, and post some options! The midi-maxi skirt sound fabulous. Lots of creativity in this group, so I'm sure we'll get you sorted out.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Thanks, ladies! I don't like (on me) button down, crisp tops, but will be searching/taking a 2nd look at what I have (thanks for the compliment, Cheryl!) and the wise advice , Diana! I WILL try and find a similar pic- or see if I can talk DH into taking a pic of the actual one. The skirt is freaking awesome, in my eyes, anyway, lol....should I try and find a velvety or lacy top to go with it, or not? And WTF should I wear to the National Dog Agility Trials to meet my longtime 'idol'???

Gigi

Veteran

I'm not the most creative person, but what I do when I get stumped for a top is wear a white cami with a cardigan. Do you have a cardigan that would work with the skirt?

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Aww, THANK YOU guys!!!! I am overwhelmed at the kindness shown......

cciele

Veteran

You totally can ask for help! I'd wear something that you totally feel comfortable and awesome in, like the skirt you mention. People will notice you, not so much what you wore

I have no idea what people wear to dog agility trials. Do they dress up like at dog shows?

carter

Veteran

I assume you've at least seen this woman at dog shows before? What does she wear? I'd mimic her if you can. At least you'll know that she'll be thinking, "What a great outfit biscuitsmom had on!"

abc

Veteran

I think if the skirt is velvet you should NOT match the shirt to it. Let it shine on its own. Go for a different fabric top altogether. Maybe something to juxtapose it - like Linda (milehighstyle) mentioned.

And yes, I had the pleasure of meeting you in person and you were FAR from a mess! Don't be so hard on yourself!!!

LoriFLA

I was going to say what Linda said. A white crisp button-down or a black t-shirt. Since you don't like a white button-down, how about a black semi-fitted t-shirt with your jewelry. I know Sharon Stone wore the white button-down but she also wore a black t-shirt with a black skirt and it looked beautiful.

ironkurtin

Veteran

I don't know what your budget is, but Eileen Fisher makes excellent and elegant basics for your body shape, and they can be dressed up or down.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Wow! Gigi, Carter, LA-C, Tracey, Linda, CC...thank you all doesn't seem enough! I dunno what is worn at the Nationals, although it is a daytime, outdoor event, so I think it would be fairly casual. Hoping I can wear my fav grey jeans and flattering dark blue jeans jacket to that, maybe I can find a non-boring top... maybe she wont even want to take the time to meet w/me.... As far as the wedding, I have *always* felt very intimidated by DH's friends, even though they have been 'kind' to my face, I've truly felt they looked down on me cuz I'm older, fat and am a from a working-poor, lower class, *not* from their upper- middle class background.

abc

Veteran

When you respect yourself, you will demand the respect of others without even trying. Try not to compare yourself. You didn't choose to be born into the family you were.

Anonymous

Biscuits Mom, you know that we Love to help with fashion problems. Is your velvet skirt fitted at the top? You could look for a silky polyester top in any color that looks best on you, or a print with a black background and maybe jewel toned ( or any colors) flowers, paisley, or what appeals to you. Maybe you have something like this that you've not thought of.
For your dog agility meeting, how about nice black pants and maybe even the same top as with the velvet skirt? I think that you can go almost anywhere with some black pants and a top ( could be a great jacket) appropriate for the occasion. Some other woman will almost certainly be wearing something similar.

LACeleste

Veteran

http://www.lyst.com/clothing/e.....greengold/

Hi,

Re: non boring top

IK just reminded me of something. Any interest in the top above? I have a size L Eileen Fisher new with tags bought during the citron frenzy at YLF. It might be lovely with your red hair.

I'm a super busty 10/12 and it is too big.

I would be delighted to send it to you if you want to try it. If not your thing, that's cool too!

Zibbets

Veteran

I'm hesitant since I just put this out there since I just suggested it to someone else, but a white wrap top really does work in a multitude of situations and is flattering on many people. I think it might be great for either event with your skirt.

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biscuitsmom

Veteran

Aww, thank you all! No, though I've 'known' Kristen for about 7 yrs, it's only been online thru FB and dog cancer forums, and have recently 'met' our mutual 'fb' friend (who she is close friends w/ IRL ) on FB. All the pics I've seen of her over the yrs suggests she dresses very casually, sneakers, etc, but haven't seen any from Trials. I'm pretty sure jeans, nice top, etc are ok for that....just super nervous. Great suggestions from all of you! I actually don't have any t type tops, but will look for some, good to know I shouldn't try to 'match' it for the wedding/reception. ABC, you are TOO kind! I felt like a f'ng mess meeting you and fab Sara! Eileen Fisher is out of my budget range, sadly

carter

Veteran

So I do love a challenge that involves shoe shopping! I think the cut of your skirt calls for some fab shoes. Given the audience, I would do conservative and classic.

I love these for $36

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biscuitsmom

Veteran

Fastkat, Zibbets, Joy, LAC, IK, Carter, I am truly *OVERWHELMED* at the kindness you and the rest of the fab YLF ladies have shown me..... I am going to see if DH will take pics of what I have to work with... Angel (our puppy) has had complications from her spay surgery:( So extra vet visits mean extra $ so money is *TIGHT* right now Thank you *EVERYONE* for your advice!!

always trying

Veteran

I have been an agility competitor for a long time..went to the AKC invitational a few years ago, and everyone was in the same old clothes they wear to classes and regular trials, even though the invitational was indoors at the conventional center. Also did obedience there and obedience people were not dressed anywhere nearly as well as the conformation people..For the most part I think, dog people are mostly non fashion conscious people. so jeans -any old kind and a decent t shirt will look great,, or sweat shirt and and or jacket depending on weather..Mostly I see hoodies, or nylon wind breaker type jackets..and also exercise gear, for those running dogs..

You have some great advice above--have fun-send me a PM about the agility nationals!

rachylou

Veteran

The fancy skirt sounds pretty cool: Tried and true would be a silky black or ivory top. I'm thinking one without a collar or even sleeveless, if that's not too cold for you. Would you ever consider going to Goodwill or a something like a Crossroads? You can get some very cool finds. Dd and I like to set a date to do all the thrift shops. A lot of fun. Oh, and I love carter's shoe find.

For the agility event - I've never been to Nationals, but I've been to our local Kennel Club shows, which are very large. Those who participate in agility tend to dress more practical - jeans, tees. Those doing "best of breed" and "best in show" - they tend to do the English librarian look (straight skirt, sensible shoes, jacket, hair up in back). It sounds very exciting, the competition you're going to!

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