I’ve been mulling over the “swagger” thing, because part of me really wants to claim that, but I don’t think it describes the way I move. I certainly don’t let my clothes tell me what to do. I can see that fence-climbing, puddle-jumping and moor-running (that pic got my attention the first time I saw it, because it looks like how I wear my clothes, skirts or not) are inherently not ladylike activities. I don’t want to be a lady, with the limitations and constriction that entails. But “swagger”, while it’s great for after you’ve made a dunk (abaya or not), isn’t me either, and not just because I can’t dunk. I don’t know if there is a term for what I’m looking for: more free and independent than a lady, more feminine than a swagger, more grown-up than Pippi Longstocking. That’s where you’ll find me, and if there’s a word for it, lmk.

On men in skirts, I’ve never been with a guy in a kilt, but the Somali guy I’ve mentioned on here before wore something like a sarong at home. When guys came over, they often brought theirs to wear in the apartment. When we went to visit his family, some men in the town wore them, while others wore pants. There was some division according to activity—pants were more for office work—but no gauging masculinity based on what a man was wearing.

Z, that video’s from the big city (to us) near where I grew up. I’m happy to see boys there being mature enough to handle it when a girl cuts past them to the basket like that.

Sally, you wear your skirts and dresses so well. You have retained a certain edginess with the looser tops and practical sandals, so that it looks authentic to your style.

I didn't realise when I posted this initially, it would lead to such an interesting discussion. Thank you Star and Stagiaire....really gave me food for thought.
I think when you are drawn to a certain look, there is something you are expressing in your personality etc. I guess swagger can mean confident and sassy and not necessarily in the way you walk. I don't walk with a swagger but I'm not dainty and I am pretty down to earth no frills, but can be a bit unconventional so maybe that is why I dress that way. Its interesting how people dress expresses aspects of themselves. i feel I am coming to know people on the forum by the way they dress....and also the way they write.

@Sally Yup - I only wear jeans for dressy occasions or in the dead of winter for precisely that reason. Besides, anything too billowy can always be tempered with strategically placed clips to make it more practical in all the right places

@SF Oh, interesting - that's cool you recognise it! Can't find the video now but I remember someone's reaction that those guys aren't 'letting' her cut past so much as they're scared to get in her way - lol she can run circles around half of them there!

Z, I always hate it when guys think they can’t /shouldn’t play hard against a girl, remember teammates and opponents when I played soccer who needed to be shown that wasn’t the way to play around me. So I asked my son if he thought they were letting her have the points. His first reaction was that she was just good at changing direction fast. On second thought, he thought the abaya might have helped with that, because while it was still swinging in one direction, she’d change headings and be off and running before the boys caught wind of it. Makes sense to me.

Love the long skirts on you!

Haha maybe I worded that wrong - they're 'scared' to get in her way because they know she's an equal match to them (her other videos show as much - she plays a fairly aggressive offense), not because they think she's a delicate flower.

Sorry for the thread hijack @Sally I guess the relevance to your situation is that you look the same way in your skirts - an equal match, not a wallflower

Just another 6-year-old girl in a tutu, shredding a 12-foot bowl. https://www.instagram.com/reel.....=copy_link

Zaeobi, yeah, the concern I was talking about was from my own experience, not your intro to the BB vid. I agree she’s head & shoulders above them & they know it.

Sally, your thread has now been thoroughly high jacked. I hope you don’t mind. My apologies if you do.

Go ahead and high jack it. I am on the hunt for more stompy boots for next winter.