Khris, other people definitely get it. Maybe not as many people here on this board, but there are a lot of people out there who are going through, or have gone through, exactly what you are right now. Have you tried to find a message board with people in a similar situation? I think that sparkpeople has a message board, and I know that Jenny Craig and Weight Watchers do--I know you don't have to be a member of Jenny to join their message board; I'm not sure about Weight Watchers. I think that having a support group of people who have been through this could help you. Of course, you have us, but it sounds from your most recent post that you are really looking for people who have been in your shoes.
I can see how a happy weight would be completely foreign to you right now--I would think of that as a long-term goal. For right now, it sounds like you are unhappy with your weight and you do want to lose more, but that you are frustrated with the current rate of weight loss and generally feel hopeless. I completely and totally understand that.
My guess is that your body has become used to what you are doing day in and day out, and your weight loss has slowed. I think that you need a kick start. I know that you said you exercise--do you want to share your current exercise routine and maybe some of us could make some suggestions for changes? How many days a week do you exercise, and how long do you go? Maybe adding a day or upping the time could help. More likely, you don't need to do either of those things, but if you just change the type of exercise you are doing, it could shock your system a bit. Changing your diet a bit could be another option--I know a lot of people have luck when they eliminate sugar, or carbs, or whatever. As a vegetarian I can't really eliminate carbs (and I do think that has made my weight loss more difficult at times), but maybe if you did that--even if only for two weeks or so--it would jumpstart things.
I have gone through many periods of weight loss where I feel like I am doing everything right, and nothing happens. I lose a pound, the next week I gain a pound. This recently happened to me for about two months, and it was awful. There is nothing worse than eating limited calories, going to the gym almost every day for an hour, and not seeing any results. You start to wonder why you're trying, and if you're just fated to never lose weight. Then I changed my exercise routine and made some small changes in my food intake and the pounds started dropping off. I do think that it could make a difference for you as well.
ETA: I totally get what you're saying about needing some type of gauge, and I think you're right. We can all say that numbers like BMI are not great indicators, and they are not. However, I do think that if you are very far outside of those ranges--like you said, not just 5 or 10 pounds--it probably indicates that losing a bit of weight wouldn't be a bad thing. I would definitely go with the link that I posted, because it will take into account the fact that you are bigger boned. But I hear where you are coming from. When I had gained a lot of weight it was tough for me to know what was a good weight for me, because I am naturally muscular, and because I am pretty short (those charts tend to be even more off for people who are quite tall and people who are short). But at the end of the day, I needed something to give me a general idea of what was right--otherwise, I worried I was just making excuses. Eventually, I figured it out for myself, but I do think it becomes more obvious as you get closer to the right weight, if that makes sense. Have you talked to a physician about this? What do they think is the right weight for you?
