Ever feel this way? - YouLookFab Forum

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Ever feel this way?

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Like you *hate* everything in your closet and all your purchases are totally wrong for you and were a waste of money? And you cant blame your feelings on having a bad hair day, or because of weight gain (although I know these are 2 major reasons for this awful feeling)....or am I the only one who often does this?

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29 replies

Latest reply was from biscuitsmom

Mamapicklejuice

Veteran

I used to feel that way prior to YLF! It gets better.

taylor

Veteran

YLF makes everything look better in the mornng:)

marianna

Veteran

I've felt like that many times, but as you start to really figure out how to dress your body and what your style persona is, it gets easier.

Vix

Veteran

I feel like I'm rubbing it in if I say, "I don't feel that way anymore"...but thankfully it's true.

[Sure, every so often I realize I don't have something appropriate for an event/weather situation -- which I hate since that usually puts me and my bank balance in an E Fashion Emergency position. But then the new stuff integrates in pretty well with the old.]

Sorry you are feeling crappy about your closet/clothes, though -- is there anything concrete we can do to help?

Michelle

(website)

Veteran

I think we've all felt this way at one time or other, Biscuitsmom, which is why I think we all wound up here. Fortunately, by stumbling onto this site, we found a way to clear our closet blues once and for all.
Would it help to enlist the forum for a closet purge? Maybe every day you allocate a certain number of items you're questioning, take pictures of them, post them here and get immediate feedback. If you're anything like me, you're probably your own worst critic and could benefit from some outside perspective on this matter.

Even if you decide to brave this spell on your own, know that you have lots of empathy from the YLF ladies who have all been in this same position and have eventually emerged looking more fab than ever!

AJ

Veteran

Yes, YLF has helped me to learn to buy items that fit and flatter my shape. I'm less likely to be lured by a cheap price and settle for "meh." (Although I'm still battling this with shoes.)

Now, I feel the way you do when I haven't been keeping up with laundry and all my favs are in the hamper! : )

Keep reading Angie's posts, trying on different things to see what flatters your shape, and determine if it's the right item before you tear the tags off (LOL!). Soon you'll hardly be singing those closet blues.

Post pics if you're unsure and we'll help you out. : )

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Sometimes I'm just *bored* by my closet even when most of the things in it suit me and look nice. It usually happens at the end of a season, which may be why you're feeling this way right now, in late August.

Scarlet

Veteran

Sounds like it is time for a YLF-mediated closet purge. Hang in there, B-mom!

rute

Veteran

Of course, I think every woman has felt this way.

I know it feels like put away the all clothes we have and go for new ones, but don't do it now, wait, buy a piece you love, loose the weight you have gain, make a nice haircut and when you feel better, you can see your wardrobe with another eyes and make better choices, then is a better time for closet purge!

April

Veteran

B-mom, I have been surprised at how long it has taken to build a functional and stylish wardrobe. I've been following YLF for nearly two years, and in that time have slowly replaced just about everything in my closet, with *many* missteps along the way. My practice now is to send anything that seems to have been a misstep to the consignment shop and not let it sit in the closet accusing me, and also to take things that are almost right and get them tailored.

I had trouble at the beginning with assembling "infrastructure": the pieces that aren't exciting to invest in but that make everything else work. The right white and black camis, for example; underwear that doesn't peek over your waistband or produce VPL; a small assortment of tights. Now that I have those items in place, getting dressed is a whole lot easier. This year I have to replace my plain black dress pants -- definitely not a thrilling purchase, but one that I know will hugely multiply my outfit options for work.

I don't know if any of this is helpful to you, but just wanted you to know that it does take time and isn't necessarily a smooth and straight path. Hang in there!

Mamapicklejuice

Veteran

Not to hijack, but April - YES!!!

Biscuitmom - I identify so much with what April wrote...I"m only about a year into reading YLF and it took me this long to purge things from my closet AND have a good enough handle on my style to want to start replacing things. I still struggle with some of the infrastructure things (watch for my thrilling "under there" post soon, lol).

I found it was helpful to start with a plan - otherwise it was too easy to buy wardrobe orphans...I am using Angie's MOTG fall list for assembling my fall outfits, as well as the fall trend list.

How can we help??? I find your post to be kind of exciting - you are not alone...let us help!

An

Oh yes!! And it's such a horrid feeling!! It's just starting to click with me the importance of the closet purge and the 'infrustructure' as April said. And sometimes it's hard to find those perfect basic pieces but so worth perservering.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

You ladies are all so kind and helpful...I truly appreciate all the comments and suggestions... It just amazes me how warm and friendly everyone here is! I wish I could lose some weight- I was heavy before and Im up 30 pounds from this time last year, due to kidney problems (its down to 30% function) and worsening fibro..I am going to do as much weeding out as I can this week- getting rid of things that just dont work for me and hopefully this coming weekend I can get my sister or DH to take pics of what I think may work (with the help of the forum) and post them to get opinions and ideas from you lovely ladies on here! Thank you all again

Lisa

Veteran

I'm with you, it is frustrating when you don't yet own a closet full of things you love. Keep plugging along buying, trying and deciding and eventually everything will fall into place.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Thanks, Lisa...

chewyspaghetti

Veteran

I realized recently that it's not worth keeping any frustrating garment. If it doesn't fit, is the wrong color, or can't be worn for another reason (or it just makes me angry when I look at it)- it has to go. That gut reaction means something, and it's not worth raising my blood pressure every time I look in my closet. I would much rather have a few things that I love, than a bunch of things that I hate.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

I totally agree! I have some things Im putting in the donation bags without even trying them, because I cant stand to look at them anymore...either I hate the way I look in them or Im just sooo tired of them....

NK

(website)

That's a good idea! If you're tired of it or you know it doesn't work, it's outta there! Don't over think it.

I think Khris totally nailed it.

For years, I think it was about finding something new to add to my wardrobe, and that left me with a lot of impulse buys and "bargains" that didn't quite work out, and a bunch of gaping holes that still needed to be filled.

I'm still learning that building a wardrobe is a process and that my closet needs constant editing.

crwilson

Veteran

I totally feel that way, and I've been reading YLF for well over a year and STILL haven't completely figured it out. I think that it comes down to infrastructure - as April mentioned. I've been really focused on only buying things that I love, and I've recently realized that I don't have basics - like a black v-neck shirt, or a white button down - or any other number of other non-exciting but versatile pieces that make a wardrobe work. The truth is that I don't think that I'm ever going to "love" a basic, plain black shirt, but not having one means that there is a big hole and that other pieces I have don't work.

I also have a number of "misses" in my closet from my early days on YLF that I like but are wrong somehow and I feel too guilty and wasteful to get rid of. I think that where I've gone wrong before is getting panicky because I have "nothing" to wear and so I've rushed out and purchased a lot of new things with what little money I had. What I'm going to try now - and this might work for you too - is to add one basic piece a month until I have a base from which to work. Then, and only then, will I start to add more unique or unusual pieces that I love.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Im sorry you feel this way too...but I think you have some great ideas to try

Barbara

Veteran

Dang, biscuitsmom, I'm sorry to hear you're in a bit of a slump. It happens to all of us. Strange how the occasional unworn or inappropriate article of clothing can negatively affect your psyche. Don't let it get to you. I'm new to YLF and am learning useful and wonderful fashion tidbits every day. Keep your chin up!

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Thanks, Barb! I think the fashion forums (especially YLF) have opened up my eyes to details that are important and that Ive previously overlooked....I just need to be patient and not try to fix 'everything' at once.....

Barbara

Veteran

That's right, you cannot rush perfection. I always tell my husband this when I'm applying makeup so I won't terrify the public with a less-than-perfect face.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

LOL Barbara! Im sure you look absolutely lovely....

April

Veteran

And hey, B-Mom -- I notice you now have THREE badges.

Take heart with your wardrobe, you'll get there.

Lorem Ipsum

Thanks for asking this question, biscuitsmom. I feel the same way. The answers here are so helpful.

biscuitsmom

Veteran

April, yes! happy dance! thanks for the encouragement...
Lorem, Im sorry you feel this way too....but this IS a great place to learn new things! Glad you found it....

Lynne

Veteran

April, you are so right..the 'infra structure' (great word) items are not always the most exciting thing to buy, but they definately earn their keep! BMom, one of Angie's posts talked about dressing for who you are NOW. I found it helpful when I was down about putting on 4kg last winter....I didn't want to spend money on my new size and had nothing except tracksuit pants that fitted.....Once I'd gone out and bought some bigger jeans and shirts, a bigger dress...I felt much better. I'm back with WW now but am focussing on looking the best I can at THIS point in time. I've kept a 'hope chest' collection of clothes that I think I would have trouble replacing when I lose last winter's weight, out of sight, but anything worn or easy to replace has gone and I feel much better for it! Look after your health and appearance and well-being...and we're all here to help!

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Thaanks, Lynne! I know I must sound like a broken record but its just amazing to me how kind and helpful everyone is on this forum! I will look for that post and try to memorize it! lol...