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Easier to be stylish when slim?

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

I've been thinking about this for the last few days. I'm not meaning to insult anyone who has a few extra pounds - goodness knows I'm in that category myself. But is it easier to be fashionable at a smaller size?

First of all, you simply have more clothing items at your disposal, thereby increasing your odds of getting it right. So many designers limit their beautiful garments to smaller sizes or even their larger sizes are cut small (I.e. Helmut Lang). So now you have less to choose from.

And some designers who do make clothing in sizes over 12, then limit the colors or styles available in these sizes.

When I peruse Pinterest, there are so many great pieces and ensembles I would love to try but they aren't available in my size. If I were a size 4 or 6, I would have a ton more options to choose from.

Just pondering...would love to hear your thoughts.

Dressing

56 replies

Latest reply was from Hil

marianna

Veteran

In my *personal* experience, YES, it is easier. I wore plus sizes for years and there is only so much to choose from (and nothing really higher end or really good quality). I've finally crossed the barrier into wearing straight sizes and there is so much more to look at, and shopping is so much more exciting. I dressed stylishly when heavier, but now that my shopping selection has expanded, it makes shopping and being stylish much easier. I know as I continue to lose more weight, I will open up more shopping options, and I am looking forward to that.

Nebraskim

Veteran

I know what you mean. When I was a size 8 years ago, it felt much easier to find cute stylish things. Or maybe the fact that as a size 12-14 now, my outlook about myself has become sort of, "even if that did fit, I'm still kind of a cow." Day Vies gently chastised me once for never ever trying "skinny" jeans. Part of it is I loathe the "ice cream cone" look I perceive they give me, but also, even if I wanted this look, I can't find any straight-leg/skinny jeans that fit my giant calves (can't find/wear tall boots due to this as well." But the good news is that even at my size, I can find things I like, that fit me, and that fit my style zeitgeist, so that's the positive side. I cannot afford designer clothing anyway...;)

pastrygirl

(website)

Veteran

It makes me sad to say it, but YES here, too. I don't think I did too badly when I was a 16/18 because it was on the cusp, but I feel like the world is wide open now that I'm wearing smaller sizes. I'm still at the upper end of designer sizing, so still not 100% able to wear anything. But, when I shop, I can always find something if I really wanted to spend money. I'm still mystified by the ability to wear lots of different dress styles! That's been one of my biggest surprises.

leopardluxe

Veteran

Unfortunately, I do think it's true that it's easier when slimmer for the reasons you mention. I also think it's more expensive to look fashionable if you're not that "ideal size 2/4/6/8/10" because whether you're plus or petite your options are more limited (both in terms of available styles and cost of those styles). Also, it usually involves paying for alterations for most things in some form or another if you want that perfect, flattering fit.

It's sad but true. I honestly think it's a very untapped market for designers. Petite and plus should get waaaay more love in the designer fashion world, imho.

Nebraskim

Veteran

Adding, too, that even moving down to a size 12 from a size 16 (where I was 2years ago) has made a difference.

Isabel

Veteran

I have been on both ends. I used to wear a size 2-4 and I was 5'6". Then I went to size 10-12 ( by no means "big"...but significantly "bigger" than I had been my whole life ) and I shrunk a bit ( due to my illness). I really, really struggled because I didn't know how to dress my body anymore.

I really felt that I could be "stylish" anymore. But it wasn't that I "couldn't" , it was that I didn't know how. I didn't know the brands or the cuts or the silhouettes. I used to wear very tailored clothes with nipped in waists. Those just didn't work because I have a belly now. Then I discovered waterfall sweaters, JAG jeans, NYDJ ( all thanks to Angie ) , and so on. I feel uber stylish and free and flawy ! No more small sweaters or tight t-shirts. But you know what ? !!! I have discovered RUCHING and I love it ! I want to shout it from the top of the rooftops..I FREAKIN' LOVE RUCHING ! My clothes are actually more interesting and fun now.

And my sister, who is a size 20, looks so fashionable. It is so much easier with the internet and with larger size clothes being more hip. It is now easier than ever. I recently discovered this brand and I LOVE it. I bought some awesome pants for my sister. They look fantastic on her. The jackets and pants are just so interesting and amazing.

http://www.zappos.com/xcvi-mon.....ychee-seed

Oh well, I could go on and on.

To answer your question. NO WAY. I just don't believe that. : )

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Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

You have the most items to choose from at retail level when you fall into the category of "regular size and height". Your assortment becomes smaller when you fall outside this main bubble in terms of size and height.

As someone who dresses people for a living, I would like to reassure you that everyone has fit challenges. Things you probably never thought of:

It's hard to find items that fit when you are smaller than a size 0.
It's hard to find items that fit when you are a small size and tall. Like ramp models. Most things are too short and too high in the waist.
I have size 6/8 clients who are much harder to fit than size 16/18 clients. It's about proportions. These plus size clients are evenly proportioned and not petite, and as a result fit most plus size clothing straight off the rack.

In my experience, the hardest size to fit is the one that is larger than regular but smaller than plus size. It's like there is a size missing in retail because proportions change drastically between the two departments. Things are further complicated when this person is short. It's really, really hard finding a size 14P and 16P.

To Isabel's point, online shopping has drastically improved the range of size availability, for which I am grateful.

shiny

Veteran

What Angie said.

But I'll add that, as a petite, being ahead of the trend curve is way more difficult than being "merely" stylish (ha!). Because I have to wait a long time for trends to trickle down to the petites.

I wanted BF jeans two years before they hit the petite section. I'm still waiting to find my perfect dropped crotch trousers -- they have only just arrived at AT petites. And I've been already been craving wider leg trousers/jeans for over a year.

When more fluid, looser fits first became edgy, I had some luck simply wearing a normal top in a regular size or sizing up in a petite to get the right look. These are now hitting the mainstream petite sections --in droves-- but unfortunately they haven't got it right quite yet. AT has a lot on offer right now and I tried all of them recently --- they were too loose, too big. Very strange. And of course, now I can't simply go buy a regular instead, because those are now a lot looser and bigger all over... and getting looser and bigger as the trend catches on....

JayS

Veteran

Amen to Angie's point about being large and short. I used to be a 16-18. And short. The places that I could shop were very limited. Shopping was a frustrating, ego sucking nightmare. At that time, 5 years ago, thankfully Coldwater Creek carried larger petite sizes. I didn't go for style..I just wanted something that fit and didn't bind or chap me. I don't think CC even carries petite sizes now.
I've been a size 4 - give or take - since then. Fit is still an issue..I'm still short..but shopping is fun now. I'm no longer intimidated to even enter a store...It's funny. I used to think that going into a store that didn't carry my size was a taboo. I never had a SA tell me that I should be shopping somewhere else, but I was always very self conscious to be in a small person store. Maybe that was my problem, but I bet many others feel the same way.
Anyway, to answer your question, yes. I think it is easier to be stylish at a smaller size...
That being said, I don't know what size you are, but I think you are one of the most stylish people on this forum. I love your WIWs. The thought process you put into your looks and the knockout results constantly awe me. You are one of my style icons.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

The availability of plus sized stuff has improved dramatically since I was a kid and my grandmother could only shop in one section of one store for very unflattering clothes. That said, there are still more options in misses sizes especially when you're on a budget or want to shop B&M. Like Angie said, once I got out of the great 14/16 chasm into straight misses 14s and 12s I had to struggle a lot less to find things and find things that fit. I will say that the selection for plus petite is minuscule. I'm 5'9" and I almost never found something that was too short for me in a plus store, whereas it happens all the time in misses. There have got to be a ton of plus petites that literally have nothing to buy in stores that fit them.

As far as the question of whether its easier to be stylish when you're a size 6, say, compared to a 10, I don't know from personal experience. But I can extrapolate based on 18 versus 14. It's not that there's anything wrong with a larger body, but whenever you are overweight the proportions change and they change for everyone a little differently. Some people are overweight at size 14 whereas I'm relatively thin compared to the past. So I would say that it's easiest to buy clothes with ittle effort, and thus easiest to be stylish, when your body is close to the body that designers expect. And for most of them that's fairly slim without a lot of excess fat, and at a certain range of heights. If you are outside those boundaries, either because of your weight or your natural proportions you have to work a lot harder.

mrseccentric

(website)

Veteran

I gotta agree with Isabel and with Angie. A lot of it, as many of you have pointed out, is just the 'system'. In 18882, the ideal shape was very voluptuous and the vast majority of clothing was made to order or homemade, so no matter your figure - big or small, 'regular' or more off beat, you could get a decent fit in your clothing. And you could have it made up in colors and style lines which flattered you, even if you couldn't afford the most sumptuous of materials and lots of frills.

Falling into the 'smaller sizes' is not a cure-all, believe me. I usually can get into the smaller sizes offered, but do they fit? Ha!!! My body proportions are WAY off of the ones developed by manufacturers. Now, we all know that sizes are all over the place in clothing. However, in one standardized line my sizes might go something like: 8 hips, 10 waist, 14 bust, 18-20 in the shoulders. It's not even like i'm one size up top and another on the bottom! The only dress which fit me gorgeously right off the hanger was my mother's wedding dress, made for her by my Grandma Gigi. But in RTW, anything that fits the hips can't be zipped up past the bust, anything that fits the shoulders is like a tent.

This is one of the reasons i sew. It's also made a huge influence on my style, as i've gravitated towards slouchy and oversized fit as a style statement and also because i dont' want to run around naked The popularity of stretch materials, knit as well as woven, has made a monumental difference in my ability to find things that i can wear - though it's kind of bunk, relying on the stretch for fit.

If i wanted to dress like Angie, with her impeccable fit and tailored elements, i'd spend all my time in the fitting room! And individual garments can only be altered so much before they turn into a hot mess.

Shannon, to your original point i remember reading Kendall Farr's The Pocket Stylist (which i won in a YLF contest, yay Angie and Inge!!!). Ms. Farr was hired by Revlon to style Emme, a plus sized model, for an ad campaign. Long story short, Ms. Farr could find bumpkiss in terms of stylish, fashionable, chic, flattering plus wear for Emme and ended up having an entire wardrobe made for Emme at at tailor's. Now, having things made to order sounds a LOT more trouble than it actually is, the web has made this phenomenally easier. Considering the time and hassle some of us have finding clothes in RTW, it's worth it.

Really, it boggles my mind how much this type of idiocy still occurs - weren't we all supposed to be able to buy unique, computer-fit ensembles by now? so much for the future!!! have fun everybody, steph

Gaylene

Veteran

Well, I think being stylish at any size (or for any shape) takes effort. That's why I loved those threads You know you're a (IT, Hourglass, Pretty Pear, Racy Rectangle, Adorable Apple when... that were on the Forum a while back. It really brought home that everyone has issues, not just me.

But, while I believe the above, I also think the aspirational images that we try to emulate contribute to our issues. My mind knows that those images are skillfully crafted by professional--or near professional--photographers, but my heart secretly wants to see that same perfection in my inexpert photos or in my mirror.

That's why it's so refreshing to see everyday photographs of real women on YLF pulling off stylish look after stylish look. And you, Shannon, are definitely one of them! You pull your ideas from so many sources, find your clothes at so many price points, pay to have things tailored to fit your shape perfectly, and wear your outfits with an engaging smile. You make it look easy and, dare I say, effortless to be stylish at your shape and size.

deb

Veteran

I was a size 0/2 until I was 52 when my seizure meds were changed. I have been a size 10/12 since. From my experience, it is not the clothing in the stores that makes it seem difficult to look more stylish it is knowing how to dress the new shape of my body that made it more difficult. I am 8 years in with this new shape and I am still learning.

rae

(website)

Veteran

What Angie said! Size 18... hm, not really in the stores at all. Proportions in Plus are wrong, too wide, yet 16 doesn't do it. :T I just had a 00 come in wanting dress pants, too... at some point you get frustrated getting stuck with whatever happens to fit whenever you are outside the range.

I will also say that even those who are within the plus and petite range of sizes have a harder time with Fashion, even if they can fit... I feel many Plus and Petite departments are skewed to an older and more classic demographic, and I've heard many complaints to this end.

Kristin L

Veteran

I think it is easier to be stylish when your one of the "normal" sizes and proportions, like Angie said. For years I've had a hard time with jackets and some cardigans because the sleeves always came down way too far. And pants never went down far enough. Since I'm 5'6, it never dawned on me that I could be petite on top until I borrowed a top from my grandmother. Before osteoporosis, she was between 5'7 and 5'8, but even then she told she always went for petite tops. For my pants, I've started ordering longs and then hemming them up so I can get that last 1-2 inches.

And for the record, I wish I was as confident and stylish as ladies like you Shannon.

Peri

Veteran

I'm agreeing with Gaylene. Don't know about easy, but you look fantastic always.

But I know what you mean because it's how I feel about my age. I used to be able to buy what I liked that looked good...hard enough. Now I also have to wonder if I'm "allowed" to wear it. So our cultural aesthetic is skewed towards thin AND young.

And I don't like that bias. I've written before about a time a year or so ago when I was in a lot of pain, and kind of depressed and I lost about 8 pounds, so I was fitting in size 2 or 4. You wouldn't believe the compliments I got about how good I looked. Never mind that I felt awful, I was soooo thin!!!! Didn't people notice my eyes? Healthy and feeling good trumps size any day. I think we are making progress...I hope some day thin and young isn't the main beautiful ideal.

adorkable

Veteran

Just chiming in: I think you're totally right, but it'a also very true that every single type of difference from the norm seems to lessen your options:

* If you're plus size or < size 0, you have fewer options;
* If you're petite or tall, you have fewer options;
* If you're very straight or very curvy, you have fewer options

Of course, they make clothes for all of these things - but they don't make them for all combinations of them, which is where it gets really tricky!

I'm on the taller side of petite and wear a 4-6, so you'd think I'd be easy to fit - but I am also very, very curvy. I know of a half-dozen companies that make extra curvy woven dress shirts, for example, but they don't make them in petite (or plus, which would also be great). They make shirts that are the right size for BOTH my chest and my waist ... except that the waist part of the shirt hits very close to the widest part of my hips. My personal solution is to avoid 99% of woven tops and dresses, but it's not ideal!

Jeanie

Veteran

Yes, I think there is a limited choice for larger sizes. Someday in the future I think we will pick a style of pants and the computers will just do a 3d scan of our body and another computer will make us the pants to fit us exactly right and these weird sizing numbers will go away!

columbine(erin)

Veteran

Hmm. I wear 4 and 6 petite. I often feel my options are limited because of my short height and because those sizes sell out so fast.

Mander

(website)

Veteran

While I certainly don't disagree that it is impossible, in my own experience as a fat girl it has been very difficult to dress well, especially if you want to incorporate many trendier looks. Some of them just do not translate to a larger body size.

Of course I recognize that it's not just large people who have problems but man, it sure gets frustrating. Somehow in the UK especially I seem to be the wrong shape and height for even the fat lady stores (which I've complained about on here ad nauseum, I'm sure). Add on all the emotional baggage and guilt that comes with being heavy and it's almost enough to suck all the joy out of fashion.

ETA: I meant that it's *not* impossible!

MsMary

Veteran

Yes, every size has challenges. But my experience is that it is about a million billion kazillion times easier for me (me personally, me only, speaking only for my own experience here) as a size 2-4P than it was when I was a 16-or-so-P. At that size, as others have mentioned, the pickings were so scarce it was more a matter of finding something that would decently cover my body without looking so horrible I wanted to cry every time I looked in the morror. "Stylish" was just a pipe dream.

Sona

Veteran

Unfortunately yes. I think average size and height does not include us 10/12's.The lowest I have ever been has been an 8 and I think it was perhaps a tad easier at that point. I am seeing so many designers not going over 8 these days. It really is a shame.

I now have a difficult to dress body. I am 5ft 6inches tall and 158 pounds (BMI 125.5)...yet I usually wear a size 12 thanks to the loose skin from baby belly. Sal from pretty already is close to my weight (and I think height too) and she revealed a few months ago that she wears an 8. I think hourglasses have the best options. I also think apples at any size are hard to fit: we have to work harder to find more stylish options. So I think it is not just size but also body shape that is important.

...makes me sad.

April

Veteran

I do think being a larger size creates additional work to make things look stylish, just as in some ways having curly hair does (way too easy to look frizzy, unkempt, or elderly poodle-cut) and wearing glasses (we all know how those can make or break a look in a way that people who don't wear them don't have to confront) and favoring flats over heels (harder to get that long lean look). Everything that takes you a little farther from the "runway ideal" makes it harder to look chic.

Harder, but by no means impossible -- which is why we're all here, right?

RedM

I think it's definitely harder to find fashionable clothes. I took my mom shopping recently and it was not a great experience. She's 4'10" (1.47 m) and a 14/16. She also has to deal with being a cross between an apple and an IT with disproportionately short legs. Most of what was available was a lot of unflattering jersey or just flat out frumpy looking. Most everything else we looked at stopped petites at 12. She felt so frustrated and disgusted with herself after an hour or so it was hard to push on. I think it's part of the reason she's kind of given up. She spends most of her time in old t-shirts and jeans bought in the boys section because it's just easier. My sister is an inch taller with a similar body type, but is a 4/6 and has a much easier time.

Gaylene

Veteran

Hmm, I wondering if there aren't really two questions here

Is it easier to be stylish when you are slim/young/a certain shape?
Is it easier to feel stylish when you are slim/young/a certain shape?

Maybe it's second question that really haunts us. Logically, given all the choices available through internet shopping, it ought to be easier today than at any time in history for the average woman, regardless of her shape and size, to be stylish. But access doesn't automatically translate into feeling stylish. Even if manufacturers and designers started flooding the market tomorrow with every conceivable size, I think we would still be discussing on this forum why feeling stylish can be hard for many of us.

I know that it's easier for me to feel stylish when I am at the lower end of my weight range and feel toned from visiting the gym regularly. Gaining a few pounds and a bit of flab on my middle makes me unhappy; my husband and friends often can't see the difference, but finding an oufit becomes frustrating because my unhappiness at my current state clouds whatever I see in the mirror. I feel dowdy, not stylish.

We've often talked on this forum about learning to love the uniqueness of our bodies regardless of their size and shape, and that style comes from within ourselves, not from a particular price point, designer, or trend. But it's hard to shake those cultural images of young, beautiful (and largely photoshopped) images that bombard us daily.

Desmo April

(website)

Veteran

It is absolutely harder to be stylish in a larger size.That doesn't mean it isn't possible and it certainly doesn't mean that smaller sizes don't have difficulties too.

For example:

I want a pair of premium jeans. The sole brand available in plus sizes is James Jeans and the only style that I have managed to find in real life didn't work for me. There simple are no other options.

catgirl

Veteran

Gaylene has said exactly what I'm thinking. I have gained a few unwanted pounds and I don't feel as stylish even though I'm still at the middle range of regular sizing. My clothes don't feel as good and my head is messing with me.

That said, I find the petite selection in most regular stores to be utterly depressing. Cheaper fabrics, dumpier style, From what Rae says it is the same in retail at the other end. Not fair.

Linda

I think as some have said it's how the clothes feel on us, that is part of "feeling stylish." I have a wonderful dark purple sheath dress with an angular neckline and a tailored waist. When I used to be a slim, young mainstream size 4 or 6, this would have fit like a dream. I would have felt wonderful wearing it every time. I am still "small." I am one of those people to whom others can say, "you don't look like you need to lose any weight." And yet I am over my comfortable longtime weight, and my weight is all in that very unhealthy midsection area. That dark purple sheath dress reminds me each time I put it on, that my waist isn't what it once was. I can wear it and it will look okay, but I won't feel fab in it. I tend to wear other styles now and pine for being able to wear the nipped-in waist that (I think it was) Deb described.

I have also, though, felt the reverse sting of seeing some nice thing in the window of a plus-size store, and realizing I might not be entirely "welcome" inside! It was a weird realization!

LoriFLA

Yes, I think it is definitely harder. I fluctuate between 14 and 16. It's easier for me to feel stylish at 14 and even easier in a size 12. Not only do clothes hang on my frame better when I'm slimmer, they're easier to find. When I was a size 12 (for about 5 minutes) there is a certain confidence. I know I can walk into any old store and those size 12s were going to fit and zip without any sucking in or unsightly bulges. When you're a 16 you're hoping those size 16s you can find in the "regular" stores fit. Thankfully for me, they do -- at this time anyway. When I'm heavy in the middle there is a certain frump factor that no style savvy is going to fix. One thing I can be thankful for is that I'm pretty well proportioned. There is no body part that is larger than the other really.

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