Dishevelled at the end of the day in the candid photo... - YouLookFab Forum

Category

General

Welcome! Read about what to wear and how to wear it on the YLF Blog. Join the YLF Forum to ask specific questions or just chat about fashion and personal style. Or check out the curated list of things we love in YLF Finds.

Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

Dishevelled at the end of the day in the candid photo...

Sal

Veteran

I went to a conference in the weekend. It was a long day and I got ready in a rush (but did check the mirror at the start of the day and again at lunch time) and I felt good in an outfit I have worn before (see below with the addition of a tan belt and a lanyard).

But then about 4.30pm we had a team photo - and boy do I look dishevelled. My hair needed a brush, my shirt is not neatly tucked and looks creased, and the jeans are looking that bit saggy around the knees etc.. I had been a bit hot at times so the makeup has worn off. And I look tired and tall and wide compared to a lot of long distance runners in the group who are very slight and narrow.

I often feel like I look good in the mirror (or good enough) but in these types of photos (which I need to do because of my position) I feel disappointed.

What are your tips and tricks to look half way decent for these moments - I have a few occasions where this happens and I want to look a bit better. Do you go and touch up your hair, shirt, lipstick etc before these candid photos - I don't even think about doing this which maybe is the problem?

These photos go on social media for the sports organisation and for our business - I am sure I can do better!!

View Info

View Info

View Info

General

36 replies

Latest reply was from Angie

Roberta

Veteran

Being caught unaware is is often part of the problem. I was once called up to the podium to accept an award with a colleague when I was not expecting it, and I basically tried to hide behind the other people.

But if given the chance, and even if not, I always put on some lip color, try to lower my shoulders, and look straight on at the camera with a smile.

It would be my personal nightmare to be photographed with a group of long distance runners! But seriously, if the photo is going to be used in any kind of media, you should be allowed the opportunity to make sure you look your best.

One last thought, amateur photographers are generally not very good. It's not you, it's them.

Sal

Veteran

Thanks Roberta - that is helpful and reassuring.

It's part of the deal sometimes - and in this case we need to promote our attendance at this conference to support our clubs.

I know we are our own worst critics - I think lowering the shoulders is good advice.

Carol

(website)

Veteran

I always look better in person, with free, breezy hair and artistic limbs. But I almost always look terrible in photos.

1. know your angles...so chin slightly up and to the side, for me.
2. throw on a coat of lipstick
3. If by yourself or with friends--take 5 or so shots.

Helena

Veteran

I suspect you are being hard on yourself but that said I relate to the feeling! I do tend to keep a small hair brush, blotting sheets and a bright but sheer lip colour in my purse .. they can do wonders on a pinch I find.

Bijou

Veteran

Commiserations, these types of photos are the worst! I just try to make sure my hair has been brushed and I was able to check my make up prior to the photo. I like to wear a jacket of some sort to give a bit of structure.

Make-up setting sprays keep make-up in place. I use MAC's Fix-It spray which keeps everything looking like it was freshly applied.

Irina

Veteran

Oh, Sal, I dread group photos at any time!
Knowing when a photo will be taken and running to a washroom to freshen up helps. Wearing something that doesn’t get wrinkled easily, too. But mostly I try to erase it from my memory

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

Erase from memory is excellent advice (for me at least). Knowing my angles and how to hold my head has slightly improved the situation too.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Ugh. This sounds like a challenging situation. I suspect you are being hard on yourself, but I understand the feelings.

If you know in advance that it's the kind of day where impromptu photos may be taken, it might make sense to try to wear a relatively crease-free and fuss-free outfit. Easier said than done, I know. And you did say you have liked this outfit in the past, which makes it all the more frustrating.

But a top that wrinkles or doesn't stay tucked, pants that bag out (or cut into the waist), or any other fit or quality issue will bother you so much all day that by the time the photo's taken, you'll be frazzled. You're going to feel bad and therefore see the photo as unflattering —whether it is, objectively, or not!

A column of colour can be good on photo day. Some issues are less visible and if the colour is flattering, that helps.

I'm fortunate to wear a pixie. The hair is rarely a problem unless it needs cutting. In a group situation, I will sometimes try to position myself so much of my body isn't visible. Other than that, as other have suggested, I will freshen up in bathroom ahead of time, if given the chance. But that isn't always possible. A smile is my best defence.

Runcarla

Veteran

I did a lot of reading on how to take good selfies when I wanted to improve the look of my WIW shots - which I shoot with a hand held cell phone looking into a mirror, and not a lot of fussing, and no filters.

I’ve found a few poses that seem to be more flattering than others. My favourite is when you stand almost sideways to the camera, then turn your upper body straight towards it. Dropping shoulders. Dropping chin to look directly at the camera, and smile. After lots of WIW selfies, the pose is almost automatic now, and I fall into it when invited to be part of a group shot.

Here is a straightforward article that might help. https://theartofbeingphotograp.....ing-angle/

Star

Veteran

It is not fair to have team photos or any photos that are going out in public taken at the end of a long and tiring day. These photos should be taken at the beginning of an event. No tips from me except my empathy! As you do pay extra attention to your appearance I can understand the disappointment.

The Cat

Veteran

Yes, Sal, if I know in advance that an important photo will be taken, I'll certainly 'go and touch up my hair, shirt, lipstick etc.'

Fresh, visible lipstick helps a lot. Smile!

And visible earrings (instead of tiny ones) will bring attention to your face, in particular your eyes. Choose a flattering metal or a favourite colour.

Another tip: Avoid wearing large patterns/prints, as these will steal too much attention.

Sally

Veteran

I gave a presentation last year for a professional organization in my teaching area at the end of a busy teaching day. It had started late and someone had poured me a glass of wine while I was waiting. Needless to say there were some dreadful photos taken of me presenting flushed with the wine and slouching. I didn't really help you much I know except to say I feel your pain. Maybe we need to be more on guard.

Sisi

Veteran

I have no suggestions Sal, sorry. I bet that you looked fab anyway. If someone took a picture of me at the end of the day I would not even want to look at it.

Anonymous

I'm sure the photo wasn't that bad, but I empathize!
I outright refuse to be photographed under any circumstances- because of social media! It is ok to say no, no matter your position in the organization.

RobinF

Veteran

Ugh, nothing worse than thinking you look great and then not seeing that in a photo. I think most of us look better in person, moving and talking, then we do frozen in a moment. I bet you looked just fine in real life.

cat2

Veteran

I keep a small bag of supplies in my tote, including a lip gloss that’s really easy to apply, and a small brush.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Ugh, I know the feeling all too well. Even though I know a little about posing, it all leaves my mind in the panic of a moment when a photo is about to be taken. I try to never be on the end of a group (wide angle lenses make anyone on the end look particularly weird and wide), try to keep my shoulders down, my body angled, and if possible, don’t have arms flat against the body. There’s a reason why so many women do the “I’m a little teapot” pose.

Trust me, it’s even worse when you hate how you look in a half hour interview video in which you’re walking around and viewed from all angles. Ughhhh. I just hope my words are so inspiring that no one notices how I look. LOL

Val

I become dishevelled quite easily. When teaching university courses or attending conferences, it’s normal for me to comb my hair, adjust my clothes, and reapply lip balm several times throughout the day. It’s become routine when I know I’m going to be in front of a lot of people and/or in a photo or video. I think “halfway decent” is a reasonable bar to aim for in that situation

Jessikams

(website)

Veteran

Now that people take photos all the time with their phones, it seems that one must constantly be “on guard” as Sally says!

I seem to look terrible unless I am trying to look good. Do you know what I mean? If I can energize, focus, and kind of force my personality out through my eyes towards the camera, if works out ok. The charisma carries the day. But if somebody snaps a candid and I’m lost in thought, or looking in another direction….just awful.

My husband never even thinks about this. I wonder what that would feel like.

unfrumped

Veteran

I look terrible in most photos , so no help. I think it was mean and thoughtless to do end- of - day pics.

I was more interested in how you felt your outfit “ performed “ over the course of the day. Rather than focusing on photo- shoots, which I don’t think I can master, I’m thinking more about days or times I thought I had a good outfit heading out, but at end of day or event I thought I looked frumpy or “ I wish I’d worn this , or that.” Versus, times when back at home I felt, yep, this WAS good.

That has happened to me a few times recently. I’m sure sometimes that could just be fatigue or some mood from the event or something else. But otherwise I’m trying to see what it tells me about either “ style”— silhouettes, colors, fit—or fabric performance, also some fit issues, fussiness, or seasonality. So bagging, sagging, seeing a different angle, necklines going askew , stuff like that I realize I tolerate when knocking about at home but then don’t want that when I’m out.

I want to use that to help with wardrobe editing, what to look for in a new purchase.

Summer has , as is common, been more challenging to be comfortable but also polished ( when that is the goal. ) I have knit tops that seem okay at first, but then too droopy for somewhere nicer. Or even cotton shirt that gets too wrinkly. I have tried several No- iron shirts that did perform well but were ultimately not my fit- usually too straight-, so still looking for the right brand. Actually Talbot’s comes close but has not been in right colors or prints. Or linen pants that I tell myself I have made peace with the crease, but later feel too wrinkly.

Also I love a tucked- in silk shirt, but they always slither out ( need high- waist undies to tuck into!) so have to consider
what’s the occasion for wear— will shirt behave.

MsMaven

Veteran

#Carla Thanks for that great article! Thanks for everyone's suggestions. Very helpful.

Cardiff girl

Veteran

I totally sympathise as does my daughter.we are both tall women and sometimes we have been at least a foot taller than anyone else in the photos,it can make one feel larger and ungainly even though that is far from the truth.So no advice from me just sympathy and bear in mind that l bet all those lean runners hated their photos too.We are often our own worst critics.

Sal

Veteran

Thanks all. Really interesting comments. A couple of things to add - we all wanted to have the team photo - including me. It was late in the day that we had time and could all get together. To promote sport and what we are doing showing people attending and connecting is important. Attending a national conference in the weekend shows our commitment and progress.

As with the work photos - showing people at events or at work is important for our marketing - and whilst when we have professional photos in we can edit them but those candid photos for social media get a lot of interest in our field (I track all our marketing posts).

Yes I was on the end. And we are all our own worst critics.

My lessons here are

1) Take 2 min to brush my hair and make sure my top is tucked nicely
2) Pre empt these types of things at the start of the day when we are all fresh.
3) Use some of the tips to look better in the photo.
4) Realise many of us dislike these opportunities.

My Mum didn't like being in ohotos and spent a lot of time being reluctant or not taking the opportunities. As she aged she was upset that there were so many photos without her. I don't know if she wanted us to push her to be in them or if it was about something else - but I vowed I would not be like that because I want to be pictured in events that I was part of. I am not a very photographic person - neither is Jon - we laugh about it because I think he is very good looking but we often have funny awkward expressions in photos.

L'Abeille

Veteran

Seeing oneself in photos can be cringey, right? However, I've learned a few things over the years.

As a fellow Flamboyant Natural, and I suspect also a bit RATE (rough around the edges), some of these tips may work for you as well. Disregard if it doesn't make sense to you.

I can never sustain a polished look for long. Things wrinkle, come untucked, hair escapes its moorings. I have learned to embrace that. I scrunch, roll up sleeves, semi-tuck, leave some buttons undone, arrange scarves haphazardly, and somehow it ends up looking intentional, and also more like me.

I haven't brushed my hair in years; I run my fingers through it and see where it ends up. Braids, ponytails, updos are often asymmetrical. And this way my hair actually has more body and gets more compliments. This was brought home to me recently when due to an arm injury, my sister and my daughter had to do my hair. They brushed and combed it and arranged it neatly, and it looked strict and boring and didn't complement my large irregular facial features... whereas my "mane" draws attention and provides the feminine edge.

Prior to photo sessions I was taught to do this: bend from the waist, then toss your head back. Maybe give your hair a fluff or run your fingers through once. Try it, I think it will freshen up your 'do.

Oh, and lipstick of course.

Sal

Veteran

Thanks L"Abeille - I agree - neat flat hair does not suit us natural types. And embracing the thing that makes us unique is a good idea.

It's good for me to think about this in advance of our trade show trip where I will be public facing much more than I currently am. Choice of tops and pants will be important that can last the day. I used to be in a public facing job where I interviewed regularly whereas now I spend a lot more time internally and I have got a bit rusty on it all!!

Dee

Veteran

Oh Sal I know what you mean by being disappointed with a photo. I went to my husband's fancy event dinner last spring and we were suddenly hustled into a couple's photo. I barely had enough time to my comb hair. I looked stiff and there was still hair in my face Ugh!
I too wished I was better prepared.

salt-sea

Are you on Instagram? There is a very useful account - thechristinebuzan. She demonstrates posing tips, unpacks celebrity shots and shows how some of the posing elements contribute to flattering photos or particular effects. I find the video format really effect for understanding as she moves in and out of certain poses.

kinnick

It’s all about the 45 degree turn. I used to be in a lot of photos bc of my husband’s job. One of the regular photographers pulled me aside one time and taught me how to stand. I still don’t get the chin right but the turn made a huge difference.

rachylou

Veteran

What a good honest question. I confess to putting almost no effort into learning to take a good picture. But thinking about it, my best spur of the moment pics have been when my hair was super super short and I was dressed like a news anchor. Also chin out yet down. Not the same at all as my most fashionable moments.

12