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Brunette hair help!

Helena

Veteran

Hi all,

Hoping I can tap into some hairstyling wisdom, or specifically hair colouring wisdom, from the group.

My hair is naturally brunette, a fairly dark brown with a tendency to pick up a bit of red in the sun. I really like my natural colour and have never coloured it on a regular basis, but sadly, the grays are starting to make their appearance and the time has come.

I have usually just used root touch up kits from the drugstore but now that there is more gray coming through, I need to start doing my whole head. As I think I've mentioned before, salons tend to either a) think you really want to be blonde and try to lighten dark hair, or b) make you look like a Goth. I did find a place that did a good job but for a single colour process, they charged me $150, which I find to be a bit insane given there was not even a trim involved in the price - literally just one colour on and then rinse and blow-dry.

So, to make a long story short (too late!!), has anyone had any luck with home kits, or found a brand that does not kill your hair? Or anyone have any tips or ideas for me? I have an appointment scheduled to have my hair done and the thought of shelling out that money again is making me feel rather ill!

Thanks for any suggestions

General

24 replies

Latest reply was from JAileen

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Ugh. Dye is expensive.

My hair is lighter so I have no good advice for brunettes. Though now I am experimenting with letting my greys come in, I am wishing I never hid them at all.

However, I'm much older than you so grey is not quite as terrifying for me. (Even so, I'm still divided on whether I'll go the whole way and I honestly don't get support from hairdressers on this -- they are all saying it is "too soon" for me even though I feel it is not at all too soon for my pocketbook!)

Colette

Veteran

Brunette here with the same exact problems as you. I never colored my hair until I just couldn't take the gray anymore. At first I tried to do it myself, but I have long hair and it was a mess so I gave up and now leave it to the professionals. I've gone to many different salons and they are all expensive. It is what it is so I built it in my budget. Several years ago I found a stylist that finally 'got' that I just want to cover my gray and not change my hair color. That being said it was still a process to get to a color that wasn't too orange-brassy (especially in the sun) or way too dark. And we still have to tweak things on occasion because hormones and other things change the way the color reacts on my hair. My hair grows extremely fast so I could go every two weeks for a touch-up but I push it to once a month.

As far as home hair color, a while ago I recall someone mentioning that Preference by Loreal was the top home hair color. I took note because I am always thinking about trying to do it myself and saving those $$$'s. It will probably require some color experimentation though. And you may even need to mix colors to get to a close match your natural hair color. When my hair was bit longer I would have also had to use two bottles at a time if I was going to pull the color through to the roots.

Hope that helps.

Vix

Veteran

Hi Torontogirl --

I have (had?) pretty much your exact hair and have some advice based on 1) what you're asking and 2) some advice based on what I wish I'd done.

For #1 -- I started greying young so we're talking decades of trying higher- and lower-priced salons for color. For me it was always kind of a crapshoot as to results even when going to the same salon and using the same formula because my hair did what it wanted to do. And per my colorists my hair responds to color in a "textbook" way, so I wasn't a big challenge or anything.

I for-sure advise semi-permanent color over permanent. It's easier on your hair, the greys act as highlights, and the grow-out looks slightly less terrible. Goldwell color gave me some of the best results in terms of color and staying power. Twice a year I had highlights (bleach, sigh) done so my hair didn't get too monotone with the color.

For #2 -- Consider embracing the grey. I know, I know...but as someone who's growing hers out (heading into month 10) I truly wish I'd never started coloring. I actually still have quite a lot of dark (about 60%) and it confirms I wasn't off-base with thinking the color was never QUITE right on me. I have posted progress pics on YLF if interested.

Good luck!

Gaylene

Veteran

I decided to embrace the grey because I wasn't willing to commit to the time and fuss of coloring. The cost was a factor, but not the main one. I was also lucky to have a stylist who was totally supportive--to the point of telling me I'd regret going the coloring route even though a sizeable portion of her business was doing just that.

For what it's worth, I think brunettes have an edge when it comes to greying. I actually liked the "sparkles" in my hair and, as the greys took over, didn't mind transitioning to a charcoal instead of a deep brown with reddish highlights. Keeping my hair super healthy and shiny also made the transition easier.

Self-coloring is tricky because, in my opinion, that one-tone, uniform brown ages many women. One of my over-55 friends has beautiful brown hair, but she has spent a lot of time and money getting exactly the right highlights, lowlights, and shadings. I suspect she is getting tired of the maintenance, but is finding it harder to transition because the demarcation is unsettling.

Thirkellgirl

Veteran

As you can see, I don't color my hair (I do occasionally use a clear John Frieda glaze for shine and body). I think about coloring it, but I like the grey and I like being real about my grey. I've also seen so many bad dye jobs that I figure my grey doesn't look any worse than too dark or too red or orange. Come over to the grey side.

rabbit

Veteran

I've been dying my dark brown hair since my 20's, as that's when I started to gray along the top part. It's not sprinkles all over, it's basically color blocks of white all along the top and especially back crown, so growing it out will involve me being a hermit for a couple months probably -- and I'm not quite ready to search for my monastic retreat ;).

The natural hair dyes you can get at Nature's -- Naturcolor and Tints of Nature have lower levels of dangerous ingredients (dying your hair dark for years can lead to a higher chance of certain cancers: http://eluxemagazine.com/beaut.....hair-dyes/ ) . Or you can order European or Japanese dyes online with safer ingredients. When I dye at home I use Tints of Nature, but since I have so much white at the back now I mostly go to a hipster barbershop where it's about 90$ for a root touch up and cut and they do a good job.

If you are getting sprinkles and you can start first with something in a semi-permanent (glaze or gloss maybe) without dangerous ingredients (but beware henna, as you can't dye over it later) that might be a good approach. Also maybe try highlights or a slightly lighter dye as it's easier to transition lighter that way, build up of years of darker dye means you can't ever strip that color, you just have to grow it out.

Traci

Veteran

My natural hair color is what I consider a darker brown. When I have bought boxed haircolor to match my hair I've learned I need to go to the shades that say "medium" not "dark". Anything with dark in the title looks black and goth like on me. I can't say I think there's much difference by brand. Nicer ones have nicer conditioning packets in them.

I bought this stuff a few months ago when I had highlights growing out and they were looking very brassy and obvious. This stuff really toned down the difference, gave my hair a glossy shine and made it look more like I'd had a fresh haircut when I hadn't. My grays are very very hard to cover, so it took the silver out of them, but did not cover them completely. http://www.target.com/p/john-f.....0&AFI

Anonymous

That one-tone brown is what I've had my entire life, and people always think I'm 10 years younger than I actually am. I hate white hair against my pale skin, so I will always color it, no matter the cost.

Helena

Veteran

Hi all, thanks so much for all the advice so far - really appreciate it! I do think gray can look lovely, but my dark hair is one thing I admit to being very vain about also, my Gray's don't take on that silvery or salt and pepper tone of some brunettes, but rather a yellowy gray that is not flattering against my skin. In any case, there are some great suggestions ... I'll try the natural stuff maybe ... Vix, you said it, it seems like great colour is a crap shoot *sigh*

jacquez

I spent years helping my brunette mom cover her grays. What worked best for her is what a lot of folks have suggested -- semi-permanent instead of permanent dyes, and going lighter than you think you need to on the dye. As a young woman, she had deep, dark, glossy red-brown hair, but any dye picture on the box that seemed to match her natural tone was much too dark on her actual head. We worked out that she needed to go about two-three shades lighter to get anything that worked and looked appropriate.

Her natural shade was very similar to the "Dark Mahogany Brown" from L'Oreal, but in order for her hair to look right I usually bought her something like "Light Amber Brown". I think this probably had something to do with the way her grays took color.

http://www.lorealparisusa.com/.....e.aspx?cid

Adelfa

Veteran

I would describe my hair the same way you do yours. When I lived in a small town I had a colorist who was a magician. I never looked brassy or goth, and my highlights never looked cheap. Plus he charged $50 no matter what he did, even for a full weave.

Since moving to LA I've had a terrible time, moving back and forth from brassy to goth. "Don't worry we'll just tone that brassiness right away" turns into a major color change. I hate hearing people say, "Your hair's so dark." Or "Oh, you got some highlights!"

I have a new hair person and I told her (with some intensity, I fear) that I did not want red, I did not want dark. I did not want my color to change dramatically either on that day, or over the course of the month that would elapse till I saw her again. It's been a month and my hair is not red, so victory! She said "I'll make is so it's a little bit more ashy" and I think "ashy" might be a useful term to try.

What I'm going for is a base color that's a shade or two lighter than my own hair, because I think my own color is too dark for my face at this point. I think I might be tired of highlights.

Going once a month feels like a lot to me, and I don't like it. But by 2.5 weeks my temples are white. My hair is still almost all dark and I'm not prepared to sport the natural look, though I certainly wish I were.

Major commiseration! This all is complicated!

rabbit

Veteran

I'll share what I do for white along the part between salon colorings, because that quarter inch or more of regrowth is very noticeable on me after trying lots of things.

There are hair 'lipsticks' -- cons: sticky, gross feeling after they are on, even if you let them dry and then comb them, coverage isn't great -- not ideal.

Hair powders you put on with a brush like eye shadow, bought at Ulta -- felt fine, but didn't cover white adequately when it was more than a few strands showing.

Spray on hair cosmetics. Have a little pointed nozzle so you can direct the spray well. Kinds I tried: Everpro -- coverage was good, color match was good, once dry and combed it didn't seem to transfer to anything and didn't have a noticeable texture. Cons -- it didn't really wash out between washings with color safe shampoos, I could still feel a little texture difference with wet hair and I had to wash my hair with Dawn dish detergent about five times right before going to the salon to get my roots touched up to make sure the dye would adhere. At which point I discovered that it had covered about an inch of gray in places unbeknownst to me so props for longevity? Marc Anthony By, By Gray -- pros, good coverage, color match, texture, washes out thoroughly. Cons -- a little color transfers to your fingers if you touch it or my glasses if I put them on my head. I haven't yet tried all Ulta's offerings for the ideal of no transfer/washes out thoroughly, but I think this product category probably works best.

ETA: there are also root touch up drugstore dyes, but they have the same chemical drawbacks/stress on hair of any other dyes I think, so I don't use them between salon visits usually.

Staysfit

Veteran

I bit the bullet and colored my hair for 10 years until there was enough grey for me to stop. Costly, time consuming, but I couldn't find a way to do it for myself. My natural color is medium brown, I think?? Hard to remember now

Marilyn

Veteran

Medium brunette here. I've been using Ion Color Brilliance Demi Permanent for the last few years to blend in the grays. I buy it at Sally. Much better than than the drug store demi's that wash out quickly. It gradually fades out over a month. No roots except the grays. I use it every 4 or 5 weeks. My hair feels and looks healthy. It makes the grays look light brown. They blend in unlike the grays that stick out like a sore thumb against dark hair.

It comes out dark so you want to go down a couple shades. I actually use 7NB which is medium neutral blonde and it's a good match for me. It looks a bit solid right after application but after a couple of washes the excess comes out and you see all the tones of your natural hair coming through. I've had positive comments from strangers and even at the salon so I think it looks ok. I use the pre-colour treatment and the after-colour sealer/treatment. You need to buy the developer as well, some gloves and a bottle. Easy peasy once you get the hang of it.

http://www.sallybeauty.com/dem.....lt,pd.html

Vix

Veteran

Hi TG --

Back again since you and Adelfa (big wave!) reminded me of a few things.

The first is a general comment that applies to both brassiness and grey looking too yellow -- wish I'd know this simple tip when still coloring!

I now use a drugstore shampoo for BLONDES once a week to help keep my grey parts more silvery (grey can get yellow-y from products, sun, etc) and tone down the brassiness I still have at month 10 thanks to very intelligently doing my last highlight a few months before quitting color. They do make shampoo etc specifically for grey hair too.

Article on above

My haircolorist would always use a toner on me monthly but I wish I'd used the anti-brassy shampoo, too. I think for we brunettes the brassiness can occur on either the pigmented hair as the color fades, the grey hair as the color fades, or both.

Also this is a great site for reading about hair coloring -- can help with understanding and communicating to your colorist.

My color was a mix of Level 3 and 4 but the natural red I have in the brown made it "pull red" really easily.

http://killerstrands.blogspot......le-to.html

From 1st article --

"Primary, Secondary and tertiary colors can be found at any level of natural hair color ( see above). DURP is the color that is left in the hair AFTER the lifting process takes place. Knowing the colors that will appear at a given level of color makes sure you will choose the proper base color formulation to either neutralize of enhance the desired color. There are just so many factors that go into knowing this, and remember all you have to learn is your OWN HAIR, so that is a fairly easy task.

As professional Hair Colorists, we must know every single hair color/texture and type - - out there . . . which is why it is hard to find a good Colorist. It is not an easy job, it takes a lot of education, a lot of training and a LOT of experience to understand a wide variety of hair types so that you are excellent with every hair type that sits their butt in your chair.

Oxidation
The percentage of lift in all hair color is related to the ammonia content. (if not ammonia then a chemical that is a substitute for ammonia yet, does the exact same thing). I have discovered after doing well over 10,000 heads of hair, that when it really comes down to what people want with their hair color ( people that can have anything in the world…)……they really just want the proper color hair in the healthiest manner. I looked into “Organic Hair Color Systems” many years ago – and after using it for 2 months, I ended up with brassy blondes and just the wrong tones on all my Level 7 to level 12 heads of hair. I just could not live with – nor could my clients. I had never had a problem with that NOR a problem with unhealthy hair ‘AFTER’ coloring. So I just did a complete 180 and went back to the hair color ( Wella, Renbow ) I had used from Day 1 and everyone was happy again. So for those of you with questions about that, I tried – and discovered what people want is properly colored hair that is Healthy when finished.

http://killerstrands.blogspot......those.html

Kiwimom

My suggestions after dying my medium/dark brown hair for the past 30 years, including a year of letting the grey grow out (which I didn't mind but DH and kids hated) is to:

1. Learn about the colour numbering system so you can have an informed conversation with your hairdresser. You need to know about base colour - i normally use a 5. You also need to know about the reflect which gives the hair it's tone. I don't like to be too brassy so often ask for ash or violet reflect.

2. Try using a permanent colour for your regrowth and a semi or demi permanent colour for the rest of your hair. Have been doing this for the past 2 years and my hair is in the best condition it's ever been in.

Good luck!

Helena

Veteran

Thanks for the wealth of knowledge everyone! I'll be scouring this thread for tips ... There is a Sally near me, I'll take a look, I actually had a stylist suggest that to me once now that you mention it, Marilyn!

kkards

Veteran

so….i'd start by saying don't assume that you need to color your whole head….have a conversation with your stylist about your goals, which include how often you want to have to "touch up" etc. my hair is dark brown, it seemed to get darker every year, and i'll be honest, i've now been coloring so long, that i'm not really sure what the "natural" color is, but i started to get grey's in my late 20's, and for the 1st decade i was able to use highlights strategically to cover, then i moved to semi/demi perm colors. also, since my hairdresser switch to organic dye's a couple of years ago, my hair feels healthier.

Aziraphale

Veteran

Torontogirl, I am going to support what Vix and Gaylene say: dark brunettes have it better when it comes to grey. It tends to look salt-and-pepper, which is lovely, and even in the earlier stages when there's barely any salt, it still somehow looks nice. On women with light brown hair like me, the grey simply makes you look a bit like a fading flower.

I suspect the reason that stylists want to try to make you go blond is that blond highlights do look really good on many older women -- but it helps to have medium to light brown hair to start with. Dark brown does not look natural when highlighted.

And what you say about them trying to make you look Goth -- that seems to be what happens when you try to return your hair to its natural brown. It's really hard to do well! My best friend, who has excellent taste in everything, has still managed to end up with a head of too-dark, dull hair from her ongoing efforts to erase the grey. She has dark brown hair which has been greying for years, and it's at the point where it doesn't look anywhere near as shiny as her original natural brown hair. You can tell it's grey hair that's been repeatedly dyed.

If I had dark hair, I'd go for a semi-permanent colour for the early stages of greying. I've done a lot of them myself, never in a shade darker than my natural colour (but often redder), and because they fade out slowly, you don't end up with the dreaded grow-out roots. Also, they are gentle on your hair. The downside is that they don't cover greys completely, I find. And once my hair got some really serious grey in it, I would absolutely let the grey happen. Like Una. I covet Una's hair.

stainedglass

I started going grey in my late teens (it runs in my family) and started coloring at home with demi-permanent color in my early 20's. After that time that I dyed my ash brown hair a few shades too dark (towards goth territory) and got hair dye on the walls, I decided that I'd rather pay someone to dye my hair. The first time that I went to a salon, my hair stylist did go too light; it was definitely on the blonde side. However, the colorist adjusted it on the second trip and after that it looked natural. The day or two after I had my hair done professionally after that, it did look a little dark, but the color would fade to the desired shade by day three. I had demi-permanent color applied just where I was getting greys. I did this for a few years, until it got to the point that I had obvious white streaks at my temples and that the colorist was having to cover my whole head, at which point I just let it grow out. I swim on a regular basis and hair dye and chlorine don't mix very well; the chlorine would turn my hair brassy, even with a swim cap and I don't like brassy hair. However, I don't really have "grey" hair; it's all pure white, so I don't really mind it. I also switched to shampoo and conditioners for color treated hair while I was dyeing my hair; since the shampoo didn't have sodium lauryl sulfate, the color lasted longer and remained closer to the original color. Good luck.

Marilyn

Veteran

Kiwimom made a good point that I forgot to mention. I also sometimes use the Clairol Root Touch Up Kit just on my grays.....along my temples, along my part, etc. It blends in really well and with the demi permanent the whole thing is seamless.

Anonymous

I have been using Wella demi permanent haircolor that I buy at Sally's. My hair is never dry and is surprisingly full of body after coloring. It totally covers my gray.

Carla

Veteran

Not brunette...but understand your delima. As a copper penny red-head, the colour of my hair was a big part of who I was (am?) I started to get white hairs in my late 40's and when I was about 25% white my hairdresser suggested 'highlights' close to the natural colour of my hair. This left some whites, but less of them. I did this every 3-4 months for 2 years, but then went for total head colour. Unfortunately red is fugitive, and my time in the pool didn't do my hair any favours. As the colour leached out, it left me more blonde than red.

I stopped colouring 2 years ago when I moved, and after a year, and a couple of short cuts, I was my natural colour. When my hair is blow dried and flat ironed, it looks strawberry blonde whereas when it goes curly it seems more white.

It made me a little sad when I introduced my son (brown hair, red beard) to a coworker and she looked at me and asked: "where did he get the red?" After this comment, I had been thinking of getting it coloured again...but after being reminded of the upkeep (per above)...I think I'll keep it natural.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

JAileen

Veteran

My natural hair color was medium brown. It turned red and gold in the sun, too.

I started turning grey in my 20s but didn't start dyeing my hair until my mid 30s. I did this for about 20 years. I don't want to think about how much money I spent.

My stylist did high and low lights, two shades of brown, not blonde. She did dye the ends, but for far less time than the rest. I've gone to the same stylist for the past 20 years, so she paid attention to the colors.