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Body type misconceptions and how it affects what you wear

celia

Veteran

Pardon my musings but I have been thinking about this.
I always knew , because frankly it is a pretty obvious thing, that I have large hips. They stand out, they are the thing that people might notice first on my body, or at least is the first thing I can see if I look myself in the mirror.
Nothing good or bad about it. They just are.
When I started being aware of fashion and body types I knew that probably i might be what was commonly known as a pear shape and 'should' dress for that body type.
However this theory was challenged when I realized that although my upper lady parts were not that big, my shoulder width matches my hips, and things get somehow smaller in between.
So , not a pear anymore, maybe an hourglass.
Things got really complicated when I realized that by some standards I am borderline petite, and to elongate you should wear a column of color. The problem is a column of color de-emphasizes the waist that I actually have and most of the times I create a wide rectangle instead of having a regular body with curves.
And for the final little twist, although I don't have rock like abs my belly is also not that prominent, so when I try to make a dark column of color topped with a lighter coat I turn myself into a flying shapeless figure again.
This has me thinking that maybe I should go for #1 than #2 in the finds. This has me thinking that maybe I should chance my dressing paradigms.
Do you feel conflicted about what part of your body you should enhance? Do you go back and forth about your body type and dress in different ways according to the 'body type of the week'?
Thank you for indulging me.

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19 replies

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Lisa

Veteran

I think part of the issue, at least for me is, all the dressing rules are just suggestions. No more are the days where a pear should only sport a bootcut or flared jean to balance the top half. One can sport skinnies and a long tunic top for a surrender the waist look instead. This flexibility and all of the options available in stores has made dressing both more interesting and confusin.

AM

Veteran

I am also broad shouldered with hips but have a waist and fairly flat stomach. And I am borderline petite. Your first coat has a silhouette that is flattering on my body. The belted jackets aren't working these days as my waist isn't as small as it used to be.

I can't keep all the guidelines in my head but I do steer away from boat necks and prefer long toppers (no belts). I also like to draw the attention up toward my face with cowl necks and scarfs. I'm not sure if this is helpful. I'm really just learning.

Beth Ann

Veteran

I used to consider myself a pear, too. As a young woman, I used to carry weight more in my hips and thighs than in my upper body. With my DS, I received the "gift of bosom," and with the decline in estrogen, my weight distributes differently.

I realize now that, structurally speaking, I'm an hourglass, since I have square shoulders to balance a pelvis that is broad -- even when I'm skinny I still seem broader when viewed from the front. In terms of weight distribution, I was a secondary pear and am now a secondary apple.

How does this change the way I dress? Really, I don't dress for body type. I just note the proportions and wardrobe elements that flatter "me" -- giving myself a unique set of "BA body type" rules, and I make trade offs. For example, cuffing my jeans is fab, but it shortens my leg line. I will cuff, but then I choose a little less contrast in the rest of the outfit, but more vertical continuity. Annother example: I keep defining my waist, but find I need a broader belt or more structure in the waistband to make it work. Low rise pants and a knit top too often reveal that my waist is a bit, um, squishy and wider.

I'd encourage you to gather some pics of outfits that seem to flatter you and make you feel terrific and use them to create a few "formulas" for dressing. BTW --- I used to bemoan my booty, but as I've grown older, I realize that curves in the bottom half make me look feminine, and I like that! Also, my hips balance my slighter wider middle now --- and I'm more accepting!

I've always felt like your WIW show a woman who knows how to dress beautifully, and in a way that flatters her form. I think you can afford to trust your instincts!

Aziraphale

Veteran

You say that petites can dress in a column of colour to make themselves look taller (and it's true, this is a useful optical trick), but if you do that, you visually erase your waist, which is a part of your anatomy that you like. I guess my suggestion would be, what would you rather do -- emphasize your small waist or mitigate your small(ish) stature? If it were me, I'd go for the former. I love the look of a tiny waist and I'm envious of women who have one! And you say you're 'borderline' petite, so you're not especially short.

I don't have this issue -- I'm tiny, yes, so I wear monochrome a lot, but I haven't much of a waist to draw attention to. I'm column-like all the way down. But I'm sure you're not the only woman who has to choose which asset she most wants to draw attention to. I'm also sure you don't look like a wide rectangle when you wear a column of colour!

Here's a though. Why don't you try a slim belt right at your waist when you wear a column of colour? That might do the trick.

Anonymous

You and I must be body shape twins. What I do is emphasize the waist when I want to. I don't always emphasize my waist. IOW, I can go either way with it. That's the beauty of having a neat hourglass figure. You can wear a variety of styles. BTW, I ignore most of the rules for petite dressing because I'm right on the border of petite and regular and have a medium bone structure. It's not like I'm really small and need to do things to look taller. I guess what I'm trying to say is that at my age, I just want to enjoy my clothes. Wearing black isn't really going to make anyone look slimmer. I want to enjoy my shoes and not worry about whether or not they're the same color as my pants to lengthen my leg line. There are all these rules that I know about but don't follow. I just look at myself in the mirror and ask myself if the outfit I chose to wear makes me look and feel the way I want it to. And that's that.

Day Vies

Veteran

I used to never tuck because I did not have a flat toned tummy. It also did not help that I was wearing the wrong sized bra -- so there was this boob tummy mash up in the middle of my torso. Then I discovered shapewear and bras that fit. I discovered my waistline. It was high but there it was. Tucking is now no longer and issue.

K.M.

Veteran

I do go back and forth with clothing re: my body type. For me the biggest change has been skinnies. I'm short, short-legged, and an hourglass with curvy hips and butt. My thighs are muscular, my knees bony and protruding, and my legs and ankles are very thin. So I always thought that skinnies not only shortened me but also made me look like a cone.
Then I started wearing skinnies tucked into medium-heeled boots of the same color and liked the elongating effect.
Then I tried them with low-heeled boots, and maybe because my poison eye had already been de-poisoned a little, I liked it too.
The final frontier was skinnies with flats and with low-heeled ankle booties or shooties. For the longest time I didn't wear this; I would try on the mirror and not like it.
But one day... I tried... and I liked it. Why? I don't know! Just the other day I was happily wearing my dark denim skinnies with black suede ankle booties and feeling very slim and elongated.

I bet the same thing will happen again with something else...

Re: belted coats. I also have a small waist and small breasts (I didn't receive the "gift of bosom" with my daughter--Beth Ann, that was funny!) and I am also petite (5'3"). The problem with belted coats for me is that often there's extra fabric because of my petite size and then it looks like I'm all inflated and puffed up. So paradoxically, an unbelted slim-cut coat like the first one in your Finds looks better unless I get a coat that has just the right amount of fabric!

Anonymous

I don't wear shapewear because of chronic pain. Anything tight causes major problems for me. I've found that the problem is not me; it's the clothes. Certain shapes and silouettes are extremely flattering--and make me look like I have a flat tummy--without having to wear shapewear. Now that I know what those items are, I seek them out when shopping, and skip over the stuff that I know will require shapewear or a tummy tuck to work.

Adelfa

Veteran

I was going to tell you to start with your intuition, but Beth Ann said it better!

And Day Vies, boob tummy mash up, lol!

Marilyn

Veteran

As a petite and an IT I look at body type guidelines as just suggestions. Some work for me and some don't.
All bodies are different and for me what works best is trying on tons of things and different outfit combinations and making note of what does or doesn't work and why. And don't be afraid to try things you think won't work because sometimes they do.

celia

Veteran

Thank you for your comments.
The downside of being an over-thinker is that first you go with your intuition and then try to make it even better than your intuition.Silly, I know.
I don't follow blindly body type( or any advice).And I will happily dress outfits that are not flattering just because they make me happy.
It makes me warm and fuzzy to know that I am not the only one with this kind of dance, though.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

I'm a pear. I've always been a pear at all of my weights. The problem came when I read a lot of advice for pears about wearing a-line skirts and not pencil skirts, and a lot of things that didn't seem to work for me. Then I discovered Imogen Lamport's distinction between Xs and 8s (I'm sure others have had the same idea, I just discovered her first) and realized that if you have the high hip shelf, it really changes how you should dress compared to the typical pear advice. So now I'm a pear/8 hybrid, and I've found that really useful to think about how I'm putting outfits together.

But then, I think we're all naturally drawn to what makes us feel good, and most of the time what makes us feel good is something that looks good in the mirror, because of fit or proportion or whatever. In my experience, people who get really into typologies make worse errors at times than people who just do it by instinct.

Summer

Veteran

Oh, celia, what knots we tie ourselves into trying to make sense of our bodies! Mine is rectangular, although I do have a slightly defined waist. I also have fairly broad, straight shoulders so I take my cues from both rectangle and IT suggested guidelines. To be honest, though, I just like to find clothes that skim my body and give me a nice long line, and I just do it by eye.
If, like you, I had a tiny waist, I would definitely show it off. It sounds as if you are quite well-balanced, so I'd call myself an hourglass and go with the fitted look, if that's the one you're happy with.

Gaylene

Veteran

I think body dressing guidelines are based on some underlying assumptions: (1) all women prefer to look tall and slim; (2) all women aspire towards a "balanced", hourglass shape; (3) all women have "figure flaws"--body areas that a woman has become sensitized into believing make her look unattractive--which they would like to disguise or downplay. If you accept these assumptions, then the "rules" make sense, but, if, as you've discovered, looking like a tall, slim hourglass with "perfect" proportions isn't particularly important to you, the guidelines collapse.

As I mentioned in another thread, reading Kibbe was an eyeopener because he seemed to think that we ought to dress to fit our own beauty--in my case, an athletic IT with a broad back; long rectangular torso, slim hips, and relatively short legs. Once I quit trying to "define a waist", "minimize my shoulders"' and "lengthen my leg line", I started to have more fun with my clothes. I realized I was shaped like a coat hanger and, when I dressed like one, I could pull off some dramatic, interesting looks that were off limits to my daintier, curvy, hourglassy sisters. Even better, I felt like I was celebrating me instead trying to imitate something I wasn't.

AM

Veteran

Another idea, I sometimes do wide belt over body skimming thin sweater tunic with long topper. Long topper gives length and minimizes hips and of course wide belt shows your waist.

Vix

Veteran

Hi Celia --

Others have touched on this a bit, but the "column of color" advice is more open than I think you're viewing it.

It basically just means to emphasize a strong vertical line (instead of having a lot of contrasting horizontal lines, like a light top + dark bottom + light shoes).

So when you want to highlight your waist, you could try things like:

-- a darker top tucked into darker bottoms [or light/light] with shoes that are similar in tone (Shoes don't have to be the same color -- printed shoes like snakeskin work well with light or dark tones; metallics that tone in are another good choice. And tops can be printed, striped, whatever as long as the overall impression of top + bottom is low contrast)

-- a dress that nips in at the waist or has a belt added (I find printed dresses just as elongating as solids as long as the prints are fairly uniform vs scattered)

-- a fitted or skimming knit worn untucked over skirts/pants (I have a charcoal wool sweater dress I wear endlessly over black skirts/pants; I also wear it over a grey skirt with a printed section in the front)

I'd enjoy seeing you rock that waist definition!

I personally feel *best* in more fitted looks, but in the past several years have moved from primarily fitted to some "waist surrender" to a pretty 50/50 mix due to trends and health issues that sometimes make blouson-y the best choice.

Looks like the style pendulum is swing back to fitted so you may find it easy to find inspiration soon....

Day Vies

Veteran

Celia - I just wanted to add that shapewear should smooth, it should never be tight. If shapewear is tight it defeats the purpose in wearing it. There should be no rolls or creases once shapewear is on and in place. If it is, then the garment is too small and a larger size should be worn. It's the same thing with bras -- no bra should be uncomfortable ... I'm going to quit while I'm ahead, I feel myself going down the rabbit hole

rachylou

Veteran

Wait, what's #1 and #2? I'm out of it.

Anyways, I don't think one can figure out their shape from measurements... the points on the curve. You have to have the image of the curve in your mind. I also, personally, find it very hard to know what I'm seeing when it comes to looking at myself. I don't ever get a general impression of myself, like you do when you see someone else for the first time. Was just talking about this on the Kibbe thread.

Anonymous

Day Vies, I was talking about my body, ridden with chronic pain, that can't wear anything that's even remotely snug. You're right that no item of clothing or lingerie should be uncomfortable. However, I have personally found I don't need shapewear if I'm wearing the right clothes, and I think many women would find that to be true if they took the time to try on different styles and silouettes to see what's most flattering.