Nowadays, in most situations:
Approachable
Nurturing
Reliable
Competent
Fun
Calm
(I don't know that I'm all these things, but I'd like people to believe I am!)
Funny how a decade earlier, in my thirties, it was the opposite. I desperately strived to look older, serious, sexy, dynamic.
About a year ago I realized how in most of my wardrobe choices, these satellite ideals were eclipsed by one elephantine, Jupiter size concern: Not To Look Fat.
Now what is strange (and sad, when I think of it) is that I happen to be by nature a rather thin person - waifish even in my bad days, and who could sometimes benefit from a bit of bulk!
"Clothes should first and foremost serve to make you look thinner than you are!" Unfortunately that false precept had been carved into my brain from a tender age, now part of the background. It was due to culture, but also because my beautiful mother had always been chubby naturally and spent her time fighting it. In my case the idea was not so much to look for thinning clothes than to avoid "fattening" ones, a true faux-pas that would inevitably ensure you to be drowned in ridicule for the years to come as soon as you'd step outside.
I never really knew what such a fattening outfit would really look like. I vaguely imagined maxi-on-maxi; elastic waist; ruffle over ruffle; a skirt or pants with undefined, free pleats; big bold prints from head to toe. Oversized flat round-toe shoes.
In other words, a clown's outfit.
I had never given it much thought as I dreaded it so much. So I tried to focus on what could slim you in a garment instead. Long, vertical lines. Crisp material, smart classic cuts. Some heel. Not too many pleats, not too many prints, and, why not, not too many colours either. (Not too much fun either). Darker, classic colours such as: Navy, Forest Green, Plum, Black, Grey. Tucking your tops (I'm a long torso), matching, but not matching your top to your shoes as it gives the eye illusion you are shorter (therefore automatically fatter). Slightly roomier clothes sometimes gave the impression one was smaller inside them. So clothes that were too fitted were risky if not banned. Nude shoes, monochrome outfits, and the list goes on.
When I finally became conscious of this, it was a big turning point in my style journey. I have to admit that some bulkier, Maxi outfits make me feel out of my comfort zone, still. But realizing this has made me wear and love new combinations that I would have never thought of otherwise.
