"You could always wear something under it" - YouLookFab Forum

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"You could always wear something under it"

stringy

Veteran

[Warning: this is a rant induced by a disappointing shopping trip]

Today I tried on umpteen tops and dresses looking for something I could turn into one of the MOTG formulas. I really want to stop wearing old jackets and sneakers to work, I want to look pulled together. But...

- long-sleeved tops have got too much room for my A-cup bust, yet cling to my tummy
- tunic tops were great except for the giant scoop necks practically down to the top of my bra, not a good look for a bony-chested gal
- a beautiful size XS short-sleeved girly blouse in a casual knit style, had a lace-insert v-neck deep enough to show skin below my bra-strap
- two size XS dresses roomy enough in the top to be sliding off my shoulders (was able to make them sit right by having my husband pull in handfuls of fabric at the back, but a C-cup would probably work fine), and elasticised waists which were perfectly placed to go around the widest point of my tummy.

And nearly every time, a salesgirl would say "oh, but you could always wear something under it". I don't want to put on more clothes, I want something that fits. And with any luck, doesn't advertise the fact that I got no exercise and far too much wine and bbq this summer.

And (for this tomboy, at least) the whole point of wearing a dress is that I don't have to find anything else to wear with it! Having to search for camis and singlets as well kind of defeats the purpose.

I don't blame the salesgirls, who all looked very young and probably just want to do their job and make a sale and then go have a life somewhere that doesn't involve frustrated shoppers like me. They're practically obliged to tell me I could wear a top underneath my dress or other top. But I don't really want to hear it anymore, I want clothes that fit my (apparently mismatched) proportions.

Ok, I promised myself I'd allow myself one rant and then I'd get over it. So...

::plans trip to different shops for next week::
::plans photo designed to let YLF ladies assess my body type::

General

16 replies

Latest reply was from Angie

Louise

Veteran

(((hugs))) I feel your frusration. Definately post a bodyshape piccie it will help so much when you know your bodyshape I had been know to sob in changing rooms because I couldn't find anything to fit I now know it was because the things were wrong for my bodyshape x

Katiepea

(website)

Veteran

Poor you stringy! I have had shopping trips like that where I have come away filled with the blahs and body loathing. Like Louise have even had the little tear in my eye when nothing fits, nothing looks right and I end up feeling and feeling like I look horrible! after what feels like countless attempts to just find something, anything to buy.

I think you should definately get your body shape assessed by the ladies. I finally did it recently (I wasn't sure if I was a pear or an hourglass - we have now decided I'm an hourglass primarily and a pear secondarily - never would have worked that out on my own!) and it is definately influencing what looks I'll consider trying and what I'll avoid thank you very much. Please do it! Be brave!

There is the perfect dress and tops out there for you stringy. You may just have to do some subtle alterations to get that perfect fit. This isn't a bad thing sweety if this is what it turns out to be! In fact I almost always have to take up my jeans and pants - that's just my reality - I have cute, but short legs. Thanks mum and dad!

I hope you feel better and you haven't let the experience really get you down. Have a great long weekend! x

stringy

Veteran

Thanks, Louise and Katiepea. I knew YLF would understand! It's so nice to have the support.

I'll post a pic for some body shape advice tomorrow and see what people think. I just don't understand who *is* supposed to fit these things. Even people with perfect bodies must look at some of the oddly shaped things in stores and just scratch their heads sometimes.

anne

Veteran

Poor stringy! How awful! Hope the forum will be able to help. I do agree that a lot of stuff at the moment seems inappropriate for the majority of people. Also on wanting to just wear a dress or top as is, without underlayers!

I can relate to the frustrations of having a small bust - mine is somewhere around A and AA. There are quite a lot of good necklines around at the moment for small busts though - pleats, ruffles etc.

What items particularly are you after?

Queen Mum

Veteran

okay, I hate to sound like the salesgirl but it does sound like you might need to find a couple of cami's to wear under things that fit otherwise but are just a tad low cut. I know you aren't wanting to add to the whole ordeal, but you can also take a dress to be altered if it fits in the bottom half but is too big in the top half.

Dawn

(website)

Oh no, Stringy! I hate it when sales assistants say that! I often hear that because I'm petite and have fit issues around my chest because necklines are often too low for me. I also have the same fit issues with waistbands being humongous. You should see if you could get some stuff altered to fit properly.

You also should post up a photo so we can tell you your body shape and help you that way.

Mellllls

Veteran

I'm sorry Finding an experienced and understanding tailor may help? I'm petite and it's just how it is for me...I can't buy any bottoms that don't need to be hemmed and taken in at the waist. I totally hear your frustration.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Hugs from me too. Silly sales assistant.

Hmmmm. How about belts? Lets get you sorted with a fab Autumn look.

rute

Veteran

I'm with you!!!!!!!
I have just return from a shopping trip too and couldn't find tops also!

Everything is sleeveless or too voluminous, nothing for a busty hourglass! I was thinking that it was so good to have a store with section: hourglasses, pretty pears.. it would make all a lot more easy, because we do not have many time to shop.

Maya

Veteran

I assure you, Stringy, it is just as bad on the opposite side of the spectrum if not worse. I can't wear ANYTHING on its own without showing a foot of cleavage and also parts of my bra (please see my "HELP!" thread for photographic evidence). I completely sympathize. These necklines are a MAJOR gripe of mine. They do not work for small OR large busts, so why do they continue to make them? Why do all v necks have to be down to your navel?

Summer is my least favorite dressing season, in part for that reason. I'm always stuck wearing layers, even when it's 90 degrees.

Elasticized waists are another major gripe of mine. They are SO unflattering! I am very shortwaisted, and yet they are always around my ribcage, never around my waist. I can't imagine they hit at the right spot on most women other than the (one and only) fit model who they were based on. They are yet another style that looks awful on my chest (and apparently girls with smaller busts aren't thrilled with them either). They also cause the dress to ride up and become blousy on top, which shortens the length.

cciele

Veteran

Aw, that sounds like a disappointing shopping trip. I totally understand when you say you don't want to wear anything extra under it. I hate armholes cut too large, white shirts too transparent, things like that.

Rest assured it is not you that is the problem, it is the clothes! I hope we can help you find a brand or style that works with your body

JennyK (NC)

Sometimes it's just plain exhausting to shop. It's supposed to be fun and yet I think every one of us has had the teary-eyed dressing room experience. I suppose it's no consolation that there is no body on which every style is flattering.

I hope you're feeling a bit better. It's very therapeutic to just get it out and know that all of your ylfabulous sisters struggle sometimes too!

Anonymous

Stringy - I have the same shopping issues that you have...My top is a size smaller than my bottom and my cup size is slightly curvier than a boy's chest. It IS really hard to find flattering, feminine clothes at this size. I spent most of my life cursing my lack of curves UNTIL I got pregnant and nursed 2 babies. Suddenly I had to deal with dressing these new boobs I had developed. It was HARD! And I counted the days until I could once again claim my boobs back. Now, I am back to my old boyish figure and I have a new appreciation for them at this size. I wouldn't want it any other way. Plus, I have befriended a tailor and make sure that my tops are fitted and flattering.

taylor

Veteran

Stringy, this is frustrating for you, but it may be where you are shopping. There ARE clothes to fit your tiny frame that are flattering, comfortable also age appropriate, so don't think you are stuck in the Jr. dept. I guess the biggest trick is finding a store that works for you and stick with it .

stringy

Veteran

Thanks everyone for your support. It means a lot to feel like I'm not alone in this.

Angie, I read your belt post closely last week and am willing to give them a try I haven't been able to figure them out yet, but I think they're a good accessory for a tomboy like me who isn't quite into necklaces, etc.

Maya, I know what you mean - I haven't met a single woman who can just waltz in to a shop and be certain that she'll find a good fit. If only we could hire personal tailors! (and hey, while we're at it, chefs and maids and foot massagers too!)

I'm feeling more cheerful today and prepared to face the stores again. As you say, Taylor, it may just have been the places I was looking. Or it might just have been a run of bad luck. And queenie, if I have to do the cami thing then I'll just have to grin and bear it I guess

My goal was to find pieces to make the MOTG #2 and #8 (skinnies/clamdiggers with tall boots) and MOTG #3 (dress/hose/boots), which is why I was particularly trying on long-sleeved tops and dresses.

I've already got myself sorted for MOTG #5 (boyfriend jacket and graphic tee) so I guess I'll just have to rely on that to avoid my old wooly jumpers for now. I also have a sort of long-line cardi that's not brilliant but will do for now.

Right after I finish baking some Anzacs I'll get the hubby to take a pic of me for body shape assessment. Thanks again to you all, hugs to everyone!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

There you go, Stringy. I think belts will become your friend. I'm very girly, but have a dainty boyish body. Wearing voluminous items and having the option of belting has been a style life saviour. I'll help you experiment :0)