'Women in Clothes' survey questions 1 & 2... for all forum members! - YouLookFab Forum

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'Women in Clothes' survey questions 1 & 2... for all forum members!

thimblelina

(website)

Veteran

One of the most intriguing aspects of the recently published 'Women in Clothes' was the central survey that the editors posed to all respondents. The book club is grinding on elsewhere in the forum ( and may dissolve if there isn't a marked interest in continuing... It is, after all, a huge book!) but I thought it might be fun to start posing the questions in small digestible bites to our forum at large. So here you go! Discuss among yourselves; I'm sure at some point your responses will get me thoroughly Mike Meyers style verklempt!

What is the most transformative conversation you have ever had with someone on the subject of fashion or style?
With whom do you talk about clothes?

General

31 replies

Latest reply was from rachylou

thimblelina

(website)

Veteran

Well, that's easy... I talk about clothes with you lot! And some of the most transformative conversations occur here, for me.

ironkurtin

Veteran

1 - It wasn't a person, it was an issue of Harper's Bazaar edited by Liz Tilberis in the mid 90s featuring women in perfect slim trousers with beautiful red-soled ankle boots. Somehow it perfectly captured how I wanted to dress, and still does.

2 - I mostly talk to my girlfriends. We text each other pictures and talk about exciting scores, commiserate and support.

bj1111

Veteran

I talk to a very well dressed (in the british vein) male about styles and another very well dressed (in the preppy vein) male friend abt what suits me.

As for transformative, seeing the first Donna Karan collection that shaped my view of what it meant to dress like a grown woman.

Elly

Veteran

1. I'm very visual, so the most powerful lasting impressions tend to be seeing someone lay something out with pictures. I have 3 examples:

dear friends from another fashion forum that is now defunct who played with the idea of a capsule for the season in a very interesting way--- essentially several of the ladies had rather large wardrobes that they pulled from and added to to make fairly small seasonal capsules based on an inspiration/mood
Angie's combos of words and pictures-- her no guilt, fun yet functional take on fashion
A prof I had taken a photography class from who was tall and Icelandic and dressed both CREATIVE and CLASSIC at the same time with a minimum of fabulous pieces, mostly basics -- there is one outfit she wore to a gallery opening that consisted of a boatneck short sleeve chiffon dress with pointy toe ankle strap heels, another favorite was a textured grey tee, jean jacket, and slim black pants with ballet flats

2. Clothes: mostly the ladies here, occasionally one of my two long-distance best friends, occasionally my female co-workers, my mom, and the SO

thimblelina

(website)

Veteran

So interesting to see these answers... Love it! My best friends really aren't into fashion; and my mother died young. She had an undeniable personal style, but wasn't much for shopping or dressing up.

E

Veteran

My library hasn't gotten the book yet, and it's pretty steep to buy it, so I'm patiently waiting to read it. I really want to though!

My mom & sister & I talk about clothes: we always went clothes shopping together when I was growing up & still like to get each other's input on new purchases. Often times there are fashion shows of new purchases when we get together if it's been awhile. Also, my mom & sister like the kinds of clothes I 'pull' for them, so if we get a chance, we still go shopping together. We're close in general though, so we tend to talk about everything! lol My other good friends aren't as into clothes as me (although I just moved, so maybe I'll make some local friends who also love getting dressed), so that's the extent of my offline conversations. Obviously, I also talk about clothes with the forum!

Hmmm, my most transformative moment was probably finding thrift shops, as suddenly I wasn't limited by my small budget or what was currently in style at the retail level. More recently, I stumbled upon some blogs that talked about Japanese sewing books, and the styles were so cute/interesting without being at all figure flattering. It really drove home for me that I don't need to look like an hourglass if I don't want to! Oh, and when I read about seasonal colour systems and realised I could work with my muted colouring, instead of trying to brighten it up. Lots of little transformative things, mainly via blog reading, to be honest. I don't think I've ever had a transformative conversation, though.

Anonymous

I suppose the most transformative conversation I've had about clothes and dressing,other than YLF, was in college with my advisor when student teaching. She wanted me to "stop blending in with the chalkboard". I was too embarrassed to explain that all my professional teaching clothes were hand-me-downs from an aunt who had gone through a brown period and everything was a shade of brown. However, when I had money and opportunity to actually shop for myself, I took her words to heart and my first purchase was a red plaid skirt and red sweater.
Now I mostly discuss clothing here and sometimes with friends.

Suja

Veteran

Honestly, YLF and YLF to both questions. There is no one in my real life that I can talk to about fashion, style or clothes. That's why I love this place so much. It is the one place I can discuss clothes and dressing, a subject I love to talk about and learn about.

Alassë

Veteran

Whom do I talk about clothes with? Just YLF.

Transformative: When a young teen, my mother explained to me that one ought not wear runners with long Goodwill skirts. I protested, but eventually quit and learned to dress better (with help from her).

Suzanne (ambergreen)

Veteran

I'm reading the book, as time permits. Enjoying it so far and interested that it does seem to fit well with how we consider fashion at YLF.

Transformative, hmm...one transformative moment was when I started reading my mom's Vogue mags at the start of the 80s and began to perceive the world of adult fashion rather than the school-centered kids' clothes I had (obviously) grown up in. (Grown being relative here. :P) But convos...I'll have to think about that.

(@Alassë, you reminded me of a time one very, very cold Boston winter when a coworker reacted to the down jacket I was wearing over my outfit that included a skirt, and she called me "a Glamour Don't." It was funny, but, well.)

I'm another who hasn't experienced much detailed discussion of clothes until YLF. Even on Ravelry, the huge knitting forum I've been a member of for what, 7 years? most discussions I follow or have are about things *other* than knitting (ostensibly a fashion sub-subject). YLF is somewhere we can get into the details of fashion without all the judgment about it that lots of us perceive from society at large, including a certain pressure to downplay and ignore it!

thimblelina

(website)

Veteran

Yes! The nonjudgemental aspect of YLF is wonderful, as is the noncompetitive camaraderie!

SandyG

Veteran

My transformative conversation was with our first exchange student. Mind you, I was in my 40s and like, super-adult, you know I'd always liked clothes but considered it a pretty lightweight topic.

She, whip-smart in languages, studious in that European way, and artistic too, had rearranged our tiny kids bedroom into her art studio bedroom. I admired her style and watched her unpack. We were talking about how she had selected the clothes and shoes for her year here and packed everything in one bag. Her second suitcase was filled with stuff her mother made her bring, and she refused to even open it, rebelling against 'bad clothes'.

She said 'I really love clothes". It was sincere, but it was also such a true and honest and authentic sentence, a lighting bolt landing in front of me. It changed how I saw clothing, societies, the history of everything. It suddenly became a serious topic that deserved time and attention.

My girlfriend and I go shopping and talk clothes, swoop down and do mini-makeovers in shops for fun, and generally lark about. But it's never often enough! YLF is a Must Read daily for clothes talk. And I really miss my exchange student! Fun + study, it was a good year with her.

SW Ann

Veteran

This forum is the only place I have to talk clothes, fashion and style. None of my friends are at all into fashion or style; in fact, they come to me when they have questions about makeup, style, or clothes in general. When I moved to Tucson in 1999, I really did move to a desert--a style desert. Practically no one here dresses up, and finding stylish clothing here is a real job. TG for the internet....for a LOT of reasons. Mostly, my sanity......

Gaylene

Veteran

Angie's blog and her encouragement to try something before dismissing it as "not me" has been transformative for me. I still staunchly believe in age appropriate dressing, but my boundaries and attitudes have widen considerately after 4+ years on the YLF site.
And the person who "gets" my interest in fashion is, oddly enough, my husband. He heartedly supports my efforts to play around with fashion and constantly encourages me to push my fashion boundries.

Lyn D.

Veteran

Another without close friends who like talking about clothes
So, I mainly talk here, of course, but often bore my poor DH with fashion talk. My Mum is the closest thing to an interested listener, but it is pretty one-sided, I will miss that when she is gone!

My transformative moments have mostly been on YLF too, especially re. planning, culling and how to hone my style and actually buy suitable and practical pieces

DonnaF

Veteran

Convo?!? It all happens here at YLF, to both questions. In terms of transformative, I would have to say Angie's words. She makes looking and being stylish so accessible, as does everyone here. YLF has shown me that there are many ways to look and be in the world, and that's okay.

shedev

Veteran

I mostly talk about fashion here, I wish more people in my personal life were interested. I do talk some to Hedev. He isn't a big supporter of trends( following others) but he does like my fashion weirdness( forging my own trail). It is giving me support during this somewhat dark phase of my fashion journey.

My formative moment was when my oldest brother died in a motorcycle crash in 86. Grieving led to wearing black, led to punk, led to being true to myself first.

amiable

Veteran

YLF is my answer to both questions. I don't talk at length about clothes with anyone else. Though I do shop with a friend in a nearby town, and sometimes take her advice on what I'm trying on

Dee

1. My most transformative conversation was probably with my mother who used to repeatedly try to tell me during my teen years that I should wear what looked good on me rather than what my friends were wearing or what was stylish. I usually ignored those conversations until I went prom dress shopping with my BFF and we were totally unable to find a dress for me despite a long day of looking and then my mom took me shopping in one afternoon and we found the perfect dress. I then really gave her credit for knowing what she was talking about. LOL

2. I mostly talk about clothes with my DD though I am gaining insight from YLF also.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

Seeing Jean Shrimpton at the Melbourne Cup in 1965. I was a teenager & just fell in love with her easy modern style. I had seen The Beatles the year before & loved their hair & their clothes but The Shrimp really started the '60s for me

I used to have three girlfriends who I regularly went shopping with but two have died & one feels she is "too old" for fashion. So now it's my daughter, my husband & YLF.

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Staysfit

Veteran

My daughter, my daughter, my daughter..... She's not quite 21, but she's the one person I have always been able to count on to give me an honest opinion. She and I shop together and talk fashion and style when we have time. Usually, she doesn't buy anything without showing me first, and until recently, I have done the same. IMO she has impeccable taste, style, color sense, and as an artist she knows how to put things together. She can pull things off the rack and just knows that they will work, and she is right. It is always a mistake not to show my DD my purchases, but because shes at University, she no longer lives in the same state. I have had to find another way to get opinions when she isn't around. I have a local friend who likes to weigh in on my fashion and style. My friend is fun to talk with and even to shop with, but it's not the same as my DD.

I think the most trans-formative conversation was with my DD. The last time she was in town, she warned me that my closed looked "greige" which is her term for lack of color, and she also warned me that I was doomed to go on the hoarders shows that her college housemates watched. She convinced me to take one month without making purchases, to clean out my closet and to reassess my style and purchasing habits. I have been doing this with support of the YLF community. Thanks everyone! YLF is now who I talk with about fashion and style, It's a warm and welcoming place and I have found the forum very helpful with what I have called my "style transformation".

Melaine

(website)

Really interesting topic. I've enjoyed following many conversations here and participating in just a handful. But I guess the conversations that have been very thought provoking for me have been those between other moms and me about the world our daughters are growing up in and how fashion and modesty will affect their self-image and choices.

Carla

Veteran

Stacy, Clinton, and the WNTW shows really opened my eyes. I did a major purge and shop after about a year of watching the show and even bought their book. Folks around me really noticed a style shift, and (positive) comments ensued. Then participation in YLF which is the next step to discovering my authentic fashion self. Classic, athletic, and casual come to mind...but I am still working at it.

I have two sons, and no daughters. However, my sons have a certain artistic temperament that expreses itself throught fashion. They 'get it' whereas DH does not always! Both sons like to go shopping with me, but often the trip gets 'highjacked' and they end up looking fab!! Eldest is euro chic and youngest is athletic with some hipster tendencies! So much fun!

Now that I live so much closer to a major metropolitan center, I hope to be part of a YLF get together. It would be so much fun to get together with kindred spirits!

Gigi

Veteran

I can't pinpoint a single most transformative conversation about fashion but rather would have to say Angie's blog posts on YLF are what really sucked me in and made me feel like I had the tools to be fashionable, however I would like to define it.

I don't have any friends who talk much about fashion, so the YLF forum is where I go for that.

UmmLila (Lisa)

Veteran

I have always been interested in fashion and style, and I've been a dedicated fashion magazine reader since I was about 13 years old. I can't look back to any one transformative moment, though. My husband and daughter are both good dressers so it's with them I have most of my IRL convos on the subject. But YLF is really the only place I've found to delve into all the nerdy little details I love (belt width, cuffs, PPL, etc.)

Mary Beth (formerly LBD)

(website)

Veteran

What a fun and thought-provoking conversation!

1) I don't know that I ever had a transformative 'conversation' with someone on the topic of style - unless it was when my grandmother showed me and my sister how to put on real, grown-up stockings. Well, pantyhose, but she called them stockings.

My transformative moment (that wasn't a conversation) was seeing George Michael's video "Father Figure". I was 17, and had just started college, and the style of that video just seemed to tie in with all the new life experiences I was having, away from a small town. I wanted everything Tania Coleridge wears in the video. I still do! Even now, the style in that video underlines my most basic, instinctual preferences for dressing: pencil skirts, corset-styled blouses and jackets, bandage styles, sheer black stockings, and a luxe coat...

2) I talk about clothes, in descending order, with: YLF. My baby sister, when she has spare moments at work, we trade links and photos of things we love. And my boyfriend, who is mostly very supportive and encouraging of my wardrobe choices, unless it is animal print, or cautioning me against high heels when he knows we're going to do a lot of walking.

jackiec

Veteran

YLF and YLF for sure. I do talk fashion with my close girlfriend quite often as well.

Interestingly, my mom was an avid sewer when I was growing up. She made a ton of our clothes. Then she went back to school and became a fashion designer. She designed and sold clothes in leather & suede. I've never really analyzed it much, but I spent a lot of time trying NOT to be like her. My sister and I would joke about the style of some of those clothes. We had "samples" of her wares, suede skirts, suede jackets, pants, etc, but I don't think we ever really appreciated the quality or the style that was right under our noses. Now my mom and I love to shop together (usually at Winners ) and it's ironic how similar we are in our tastes (not everything). So I would say that my most "formative" discussion and experiences with fashion have been through and with my mom. I discovered early on what I didn't like, but she also instilled in me a love of fabrics, textures, and quality. Too bad she doesn't design anymore...I'd be ordering up jackets like crazy! Another funny story - we were always forbidden to go to Danier - they were direct competition for her. Last year I actually took her into a Danier to show her something I'd seen. She visibly cringed when she walked in (and then went nuts and bought a purse ).

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

I am not completely sure how to answer the transformative question. In many ways, the most transformative discussions usually take place in my own head. Pondering the meaning of it all usually brings about light bulb moments that I don't get anywhere else. Although the discussions on this forum and with my friend TriciaW are right in the mix.

And speaking of the "with whom" question, Tricia is in town just for the weekend! Shopping is definitely on the agenda, but for tonight it is browsing in the forum - speaking of our online friends and their style. A little prossecco and some online shopping. Pretty much a perfect evening of fashion talk.

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Style Fan

Veteran

Another fan of Jean Shrimpton here! I will add Julie Christie as well.

Transformative Conversation. There wasn't one moment but my older sister had a huge influence on me. She loves clothes and fashion. She has a great sense of style. We discovered some home movies after my mother died and in one of them DS is about 15 years old. She looks like a perfect mod. Haircut, outfit and go go boots. That whole era has influenced me.

Who do I talk to about fashion: I talk to my older sister and my sister in law (brother's wife). I have had some friends who like fashion but they are not as interested as me. I look at it like art and as a creative expression. It is hard to find someone who sees it that way. DS and DS in law understand fashion that way. Of course there is YLF. I am glad I found this forum.

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