More confessions -- Marianna and I have been in the same boat, and we both planned to come clean to the thread today. I, too, have fallen off the wagon to some degree, though I don't actually know if I've gained much. The fact that I fit into a smaller dress size last week signals that I'm likely stuck at the same plateau where I've been residing since freaking mid march. I can't justify the lapse all that well, other than to say that my head hasn't been a fun place to be of late and I let my routine slide. By and large I made reasonable choices, but I definitely let things go sometimes too. I couldn't possibly agree more with Marianna -- weight loss is a genuine battle for some of us, and sadly common sense is not an effective weapon in that fight. It helps, certainly, but it's not enough. I don't know why I relapse, nor do I fully understand how I went from being a size 8 at age 18 to looking the way I do now. I do have motivation to change, and I've proven to myself that I can make progress, but I know that guilt is often my downfall. One slipup and my conscience swings into overdrive, and that compounds any other emotional business that may be going on. I even feel bad about leaning too heavily on you fabulous people at ttimes like that, since I don't want to exhaust your patience or highlight my own lack of self-sufficiency. But I do know that many of you understand, and I hope you don't find this little rant too self-indulgent.
Back to business. I spent the afternoon cooking yesterday, so healthy options abound at my place right now. I'm feeling motivated and I've got a plan to get back on track, and I think that's a decent start. I also have short-term motivation in the form of weddings -- I have four of them to attend this summer, and I am thinking of getting a dress made for them. I want to look my best for these occasions, for my own sake and in honour of my friends at the alter. My lovely but critical parents will also be attending two of these functions, and I must admit that raises the stakes for me too.
Khris, great job on a huge loss this week!! As you can see, I fully understand your frustration, but I know you'll get back. If anything, you've proven that you're tenacious and get things done!
Magda, I totally understand fear of stepping on the scale. Give it a shot if you feel strong enough to do so, but if not, focus on how much you've lost to date and the way your clothes are fitting.
Thanks for hearing me out, ladies!
