Many hugs and strength in handling this difficult situation. I wish all the best for your sons recovery and for peace for your heart when having to approach the living situation for your MIL. Seconding Una on making sure you have the proper power of attny and such to cover youselves legally speaking.

I'd been wondering about your MIL and had forgotten about the OT section. Duh! I hope your son has recovered. In dealing with my own mom, I am realizing that when dementia starts to set in that it is much like dealing with a toddler. They become very self-centered and can no longer think about or understand the needs of others. They want what they want, and they want it NOW. I have never been a smoker, so I have no idea how much of a nicotine kick those patches release. I hope you can get her to accept those things as you try to wean her off that powerful addiction. Unless she is ready to quit, I doubt hypnotherapy would work.

After he developed double pneumonia as a young child, DH has had chronic asthma. Whenever he gets sick, he has to go on a breathing machine, but knock on wood, hasn't been hospitalized since childhood. I hope your son learns how to manage his asthma and maybe get a breathing machine for home.

This Sandwich Generation thing is rough, isn't it? Hang in there. You are a very special DIL.

Shannon,
I am really late to weigh in here, but I just want to send you support and love as you deal with these troubles. You are always so upbeat and fashionable, no matter what you are facing in your personal life. That is a real gift. I'm glad you feel comfortable sharing your challenges with us. We are here for you!

BTW, I think you are a saint for taking in your MIL with such grace and love. That is not always an easy endeavor, and I really admire your positive attitude toward her situation..and life in general.

All will be well in time. Thinking of you. XOXO