Why I dress so weird - how to shop? - YouLookFab Forum

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Why I dress so weird - how to shop?

rachylou

Veteran

I have decided one reason I dress so weird is that everything's a big blur when I go shopping. I only find the things that really stick out. Went to check out this Bloomingdale's outlet and it turned out it was in a giant "upscale outlet" shopping center. Saks, Neimans, Barney's, etc. Where half off means you could still be paying $990.

Anyways, totally overwhelming. Everything looked the same blah blah blah to me. I couldn't see anything to examine more closely. How do you guys find stuff on the racks?

Shopping

35 replies

Latest reply was from rachylou

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

I have to been in a certain mindset to tackle places like that. If they sort by brand, it helps me greatly because I can focus on brands I like. Generally I prefer smaller departments (eg Via C in the downtown Seattle Nordstrom is a very manageable size) and boutiques.

Nadya

Veteran

When I'm scanning crowded racks I filter first by color/pattern and then fabric. For me that eliminates about 80%, between the colors I don't wear and the colors I have too much of. (Hellooooo, black,)

If it's a really crazy situation like the one you describe them I might look for just one type of thing, like jackets or skirts. Better to find one fab thing than try to look at everything and have your head explode.

Lantana

Veteran

Boy, do I identify with this problem. This is one of the reasons I do 90% of my shopping on line. I get rattled by the lighting in big stores, even in big supermarkets. I think it's because I live quietly in the countrside and have lost the urban savvy I used to have when I was a city dweller.
Thanks for posting this, I will be borrowing the advice you get.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

Yes I need to be really focussed too.

When I lived in a larger city I would go to the small shops/boutiques first to
"get my eye in". I never go shopping without my list now - I am too easily distracted.

rae

(website)

Veteran

Hm, this sort of intrigues me. I'm not sure I have advice, since I clearly don't have this issue, what with all the sifting through piles of junk I've done in my life. To give it a shot, I think it helped a lot to pre-plan and really nail down my aspirational style and capsule colors. It kind of helps to reset your filters so that the things that jump out at you are the things you want. If I'm shopping for someone else, I have to take a moment and switch gears to a different filter. Does that sound weird and cyborg-y? o_0 I guess it's like... having a mental note to notice anything citron or orange or steampunk or grunge and flat-out ignore everything else.

Jjsloane

Veteran

I have the same problem (and I shop ALOT). I was quite overwhelmed at Century 21 last weekend because it was sorted by Designer (many of which I was unfamiliar with) rather than by clothing type. I think this is why I stick mostly to online shopping (love the sort by color, size, price...) and only a few B&M stores like the Rack which I know the organization of and having a list of items in mind is always easier.

bj1111

Veteran

Omg...i could have written the post title.

I seem to be having a crisis of sartorial faith, coupled with all the earlier talk of self modulating to fit the dress culture. Is it contagious?

Day Vies

Veteran

I go when it's quiet and no one is in the store. I will leave a store where the music is too loud or annoying. I don't shop when I am running late, multi-tasking or hungry. I don't shop in stores where the sales people don't "recover" the floor -- meaning that clothing is properly organized by size and color. Clothing is also retrieved from fitting rooms and sizes are replenished on a regular basis. I do tend to gravitate toward pretty colors, interesting cuts and prints.

I spend a lot of time on clearance racks because you don't know what gem you will find -- but if it looks messy (clothes strewn all over the floor, hangers jutting out in all directions etc.) and picked over, you couldn't pay me to sift through the racks.

I am most efficient when I am searching for a specific item.

I am least efficient when I visit a store where I haven't been for a while and I've got money and time to burn.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I have this problem, too. Living inside my own head so much of the time, I find stores discombobulating. And big discount stores or department stores are the worst.

I really like what Rae said -- putting a sort of filter on. Knowing what you are after so the rest falls away like dross.

But that takes a lot of pre-thought and planning. That's what Angie's blog and the forum are so good for.

I also like the idea of limiting oneself to a colour palette or a particular type of desired article....and then if the perfect "something else" happens to pop into your hands, it is okay...it's just that you're not so lost in the process.

celia

Veteran

I am with you. Usually I prefer to shop in stores that I can visit often, see he items, go back home and think about it and then come back and buy. Not a big fan of going trough the racks or visiting different stores . Might do it if I have a precise item that I want, say a pink shirt, because that way everything else will just blur and my tunnel vision will not make me feel overwhelmed.

deb

Veteran

I hate racks and avoid them at all costs. I think that is why I like online shopping so much.

catgirl

Veteran

Yeah, this is how I am too but with entire internet at my disposal!

Scarlet

Veteran

I wouldn't even try to shop at a store like that because it does just confuse me unless I am looking for something very specific and can just automatically discount most of what is before me. I like to shop well organized stores, possibly with helpful sales staff, and not when there are too many people.

On a side note about lighting, I was back in the U.S. recently in a few chain stores and found the lighting really hard to deal with. Everything seemed really bright and unnatural and loud. I couldn't really think. So Lantana, it may be the lighting has changed, not you.

Liz A.

Veteran

I'm with Nadya. I shop in these kind of stores a lot and there is just no way to look at everything. I scan until something pops out at me. Usually it's pattern, color, or fabric quality. I don't mind missing things here or there because it allows me to stay sane.

Ingunn

(website)

Veteran

I know what you mean! It IS overwhelming. For me, it helps to determine in advance what to look for: A dress, or a blazer etc. Or, I could be looking for a particular color to add to my wardrobe.

anne

Veteran

I feel overwhelmed too. Good tips in this thread.

Mochi

Veteran

I could have written this post as well, at least in terms of overwhelm. (I don't feel like I dress "weird"...but this could explain why I have so few clothes.)

One thing that helps me in a minute way is my very strong feelings about color and pattern--I will skip right over those items because it's so obvious.

Other than that, I'm of no help. Like Day Vies, I have a hard time with messiness (because it reflects a state of mind I'm probably already bringing to the store) but I have shopped many times in bargain situations where that's the reality.

I guess, now that I think of it, joining YLF has enabled me to embrace internet shopping, and that's how I got my start. It's so great (especially with a website with great filters, like Nordstroms). And I have the options to return things in-store much, if not most, of the time. Oh, did I tell you my bit of weirdness about hating to box things up and send them back by mail? Don't ask why; I have no idea.

Diana

Veteran

Ok, so I love stores full of crazy jumbled racks full of treasures...But I hate when they are full of people.. That's when I get overwhelmed. I like when it's just me, a couple of other shoppers, and one or two unobtrusive SAs. I know this is not always possible but have you tried going at less busy times. Avoid weekend afternoons, try mornings (preferably on weekdays) instead. Much easier to focus when you don't have to push through people, listen to their loud conversations, smell their too-strong perfume... Plus no waiting in line once you find your treasure!

Or you could shop online, where it's always quiet.

Wow, I sound kind of cranky and antisocial... I don't do well with crowds.

annaj

Veteran

I understand what you are saying. I take a different approach, as I HATE filtering through racks of rubbish!!

I like to find a smaller "boutique" type store that I really like "over all" and then try things on and get an idea of the look that I like on me. I then buy a few key pieces from that store and add basics from cheaper chain stores and department stores. It's often difficult to buy a great pair of cheap jeans (they don't fit me) so I will pay more for those, but a white tee is a white tee where ever you go, so I buy cheaper versions.

That really fits in with what others have said about knowing what to shop for, but I always try on lots in order to decide what I am looking for first.

Tanya

Veteran

I used to be able to do pretty well in big department stores/discount stores types, but I always had the kind of filtering going on that Rae describes. It also helps that usually there aren't that many sizes 0/2 there to begin with.
But lately I find more and more that browsing for longer than 2 h causes headaches so I have switched to chain stores, such as BR, and online. Online has always been my favorite.

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

I always stop to eat to strategize and plot out a plan to take over the store ... uh, I mean, shop wisely, before I hit up a big mall. And besides I'd have a full stomach so I'm less likely to be in a hurry!

And go to the bathroom too!

ironkurtin

Veteran

I shop by brand. Sometimes I discover a new one, but since I am very fussy about fabrics it helps to know who uses what I like.

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

Maybe you have ADHD Rachylou?

I generally don't have this problem. But I do struggle the most with discount places like TJ Maxx or Marshalls where things are poorly organized, I have to have a lot of stamina to filter through racks of cr*p. I do like looking through stores like this for purses though, which are merchandised face front or just 3-4 deep, not like clothing racks which you have to wave your hand through repeatedly. (My niece is a TV commercial stylist and she gets a tendonitis RSI from doing this while shopping for jobs -- sometimes I wonder if this contributes to Angie's sore arm, when combined with a lot of time at a computer.)

I am more and more liking on-line shopping, also I am more disciplined on-line, at B&M stores I get seduced by the environment and sheer quantities.

And as for outlet complexes, I am not a big fan. While some of the merchandise might be from a past season, some of it is also directly made for that channel at lower quality.

RoseandJoan

Veteran

I think this is one area where shopping frequently helps, being familiar with the stock and layout helps a lot.

Having a rough idea of what you need also helps to eliminate the excess.

Thirdly, taking frequent breaks to calm the senses and reassess really works for me.

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

Wow--interesting thread. I think this is why I prefer to shop at just a few places. I do almost all of my shopping at Nordstrom and a couple of local boutiques. I rely a lot on sales people who know my style.

Anonymous

Are you usually shopping for something specific when you go out Rachylou? I might look for the elusive perfectly tailored sheath dress or dressy trousers in a place like that because they are the hardest things for me to fit. I would decide what colors I wanted and then shop with blinders on towards everything else.

I used to impulse buy all of the interesting statement pieces, but then I wound up with too much craziness in my wardrobe and no basic things to wear them with. I'm used to shopping outlets with great masses of the unwashed. I feel more stress when I'm in a regular mall, getting accosted by the perfume ladies and cell phone guys in the kiosks. There seems to be so much more visual noise in retail malls as well. Give me trash to dig through, because the gems seems to show up better against the dank darkness of plastic crates more easily than the glittering retail displays.

cciele

Veteran

In department stores, like Nordstrom, I stick to the departments that I know work for me and ignore the rest. Or I shop at boutiques stocking clothes that match my aesthetic -- a well-curated collection is a beautiful thing to see!

Anonymous

I've found what I've learned from Angie extremely helpful. First I try to shop for something specific, ignoring anything in the wrong color, neckline, length, shape, etc. for my style goals and body. That eliminates much from consideration.
It also helps to know some of your ideal measurements such as inseam, rise, etc. and carry a little tape measure to measure garments for fit before trying on.
once upon a time I would be so overwhelmed that when I saw something I liked on a mannequin, I bought the whole outfit as styled.
Using a personal shopper such as at Nordstroms might be another idea.

amiable

Veteran

Yes, I'm with you. I find internet shopping even worse to be honest - so many things all over the internet! What's the best price? What's the best place to buy from? Do they allow returns? Am I really willing to buy something without trying it on?

Sometimes it does feel hopeless. Oh well.

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