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Why do you dislike Bra Shopping?

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I was surprised to read how many people loathe buying bras on Laura's thread:

http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....opping-for

I LOVE pretty underwear, and if I weren't a hard size to find (a very small cut 30D or 29D), I'd spend a lot more on bras and knickers. Wearing pretty underwear makes me feel fab. And although very few people see me in my underwear - I see it, and knowing I'm wearing a pretty set makes a difference to my overall outfit, and the way I feel about my style. Gaylene and Ali were the only ones I could high five on that thread.

I just bought a beautiful matching blush bra and knicker set that was FINALLY available in the style I love to wear. It's taken me years to find that colour - and I'm thrilled about it.

So what is it about bra shopping that is so wildly dislikable?

Shopping

95 replies

Latest reply was from ManidipaM

Janet

(website)

Veteran

For me, I get frustrated at the way sizing on a lot of the really pretty stuff tends to stop at a D cup. Although I have to admit, selections seem to be getting a little better in the last year or so.

Oh, and when it comes to matching sets with panties, which I love in theory, too often the matching panties are either thongs or boy shorts, neither of which are what I want. I look horrible in boy shorts! I just want a nice simple bikini style bottom.

I also get frustrated that many styles look ok in the mirror without clothing, but when I put on a fitted top and turn to the side, it looks like the bra has pushed my boobs to the sides. Maybe it's because I have a fairly narrow back, but it seems to be tricky to get the set of the cups right -- many are just too wide set, and even though the cup is the right size, I get spillage because the cups are set too far apart.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

That's a great detailed explanation, Janet. Thank you - and it makes sense. I'm a boy shorts gal, although I DID buy bikini panties to match my new blush set because they were sooooooo pretty, and very comfortable. But boyshorts make up 99% of my knickers capsule. I do not wear thongs.

Janet, I'm glad you re-fit clothes when you're fitting a bra. That's very important. I wonder if wearing a cami over my bra helps with that issue?

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Also, I want to reiterate that I know it's hard to find a comfy bra that fits. I'm in that boat too. I am down to one style that I purchase in multiple colours.

Simone Perele 'Andora 3D' Molded Underwire Bra

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Diana

Veteran

I don't really dislike it but I do find it frustrating because my ideal bra band size is actually a 32 in back and 36 in front (I have wide set breasts, a large rib cage, but narrow back.) of course this does not exist so I need to buy 34s that have wide set cups. Add in my short upper body which restricts me mainly to Demi or balconette styles, plus the fact that I really dislike molded and padded styles, and the pool keeps shrinking. At least I am a really common size (34c).

My current favorite bra brand is Lejaby which I have to buy online because no stores here carry it.

Diana

Veteran

PS- I like pretty bras but never buy matching undies. I like my cotton hipsters thankyouverymuch. The pretty undies are always uncomfortable.

April

Veteran

Hmm. Standing around topless while the SA finds a different size, seeing that lovely ridge of back fat created by the bra band in a three-way mirror, getting a well-lighted, up-close view of the changes age has wrought upon your bustline -- what's not to enjoy?

amiable

Veteran

I have not yet found a bra that I like the way it's made and the way it fits. I'm sure it's out there - but I'm impatient and cheap. Most things are easy to fit on me - bras seem to be an exception.

I'm making my own at the moment, and they're also "just okay". They fit fine, but I want them a tad more supportive, and with less obvious seams. I'll be experimenting with that on my next batch.

rae

(website)

Veteran

I don't mind bra shopping, because I'm pretty utilitarian and wear only nude or black unless I've found a steal. I don't wear pretty ones, because then I have to worry about show-through on thin knit tops - which are staples here in SoCal.

BUT, I do hear a lot from customers! And when I get a bra fitter in to help me, sometimes it can take two hours... Also some of what I've heard:

- poor selection sans underwire
- can't get the coverage w/o thick padding
- back fat shows with thinner straps once they find cups that fit
- chest uneven
- cups fit, but now straps are too narrow
- cups fit, but now the cut of the bra shows in her favorite necklines
- allergies to spandex

ETA: Since we're talking knickers

- painful camel toe w/thongs

- wedgies

- seams

- lace shows through silky summer dresses

- legs roll up on boyshorts

- not enough cotton selection!!!

Anonymous

High five Janet, I hate wearing boy shorts and thongs. I want a straight forward bikini style pant with good butt cheek coverage so I don't get wedgies. In my local town there aren't many places to go for a decent range of bras. I've lost count of the amount of times they haven't got my size in stock, so I would have to wait or my size just isn't available at all in the style I like. I'm a 'plain tee shirt bra with some light padding' kind of a gal. I take a 32 DD or 34D depending on brands. Due to the knicker style problem I just buy separate ones in cotton and always buy white or skin tone bras so at least it looks like a set. Oh, and I also get sick of bras that make my boobs point slightly to each side instead of front and centre. My sports bra funnily enough pushes them in and hoicks them up to a great shape.... Rant over

Elle

Veteran

It's an overall horrible experience for me -
-Hard to find bras with out underwires
-Too much padding
-Hard to find all-cotton underwear to match
-Straps are generally too narrow
-SA always puts me in bras with bands that are so small I feel strangled.
-Expensive when you can't really tell how it will feel after a days wearing

I end up in sports bras or stretchy bralettes to avoid the experience.

TraceyLiz65

(website)

Veteran

I have to say that I hate the lack of convienence in shopping for a smaller band size and larger cup size because you just can't find them anywhere!!!!

MuseumGal

Veteran

My size (38 G or H) tends to get overlooked by both the straight size bra makers and the plus size bra makers. Also, I've NEVER found an underwire that lays flat against my breastbone like they are *supposed* to. It was easier when I lived in CA, but here in OK, there is no Nordies or similar place to try on tons of brands/styles until I find one that fits properly. It was also easier when I was wearing the wrong size - it's much easier to find a 42 DDD, which is probably why I wore that size for so many years.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

You absolutely can, Tracey. Unfortunately, they are expensive.

Diana, most of my clients like cotton hipsters so you are in the majority. Also, apparently Nordies downtown sells lots of thongs. I am in the minority loving boyshorts - so the SA told me.

Museum Gal, have you tried bras at Bare Necessities? They specialize in your size.

So, it sounds like many have a fit and comfort challenge. I wonder though - and bear with me as I play devils advocate - whether you're expecting too much comfort from a bra. Much like expecting too much from a t-shirt. Or expecting that a fitted woven jacket is as comfy as a fluid knitted cardigan. The bra selection today is a billion times better than it used to be - yet the dissatifaction continues. It's interesting.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts ladies. I believe that you're genuinely challenged - and you have my empathy. If I can help - or others can help - in any way, shout.

MsMaven

Veteran

I'd say most of the complaints above apply to me. Why on earth do they make a 32G with skinny little straps? It is hard to find my size in a shape I want. Fortunately, lately I find more and more brands are carrying this size. Still, I'd rather order online than go to the fitting room. I have been fitted several times.

crutcher

Veteran

I hate bra shopping...Last fit, I went to Nordstrom to a "bra fit expert"...Tried on bras until I was simply tired and finally bought two...The two I bought were not inexpensive...Brought them home and I wear them for some kind of dress up...BLUSH..I wear a sports bra for every day...TMI...I don't know if I was incorrectly fit or if like you (Angie) said, "Maybe you expect too much from a bra." Brrrr...I hate to bra shop...

Karie

(website)

Veteran

I don't mind bra shopping, except I'm in the very small size range (I'm in the "Why bother wearing one at all?" size range) so it can be depressing. And I also love boy shorts. My favorite is Jockey brand, they're the only ones I've found that have no issues with riding up. Does anyone know of another brand of boy shorts that doesn't ride up?

Mo

(website)

Veteran

The short and sweet answer is because I have never found 'my' size. FWIW, I have tried several of the bras you wear yourself. The Andora just doesn't flatter me in the least, and the Caressence I am right between sizes (as usual). The best 'fit' I've gotten is taking 32C's that are wider and shallower and cutting the bands and hook/eyes and resewing them closer together. Even that isn't quite right though

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Oh, and I just have to give a shout out to the Gilligan O'Malley modal thongs at Target. I know tons of you would never consider a thong, but I swear, these are different. Like wearing air. Really. I wouldn't lie to you. It only takes $5 to decide for yourself at any rate . . . lol

Suja

Veteran

I guess it's because I just haven't found a bra that makes me feel as fab as a new pair of shoes. They just seem like utilitarian purchases. Many people and bloggers swear by the power of the right bra to enhance your look but so far no bra has done that much to make me feel great. Maybe I just haven't found the right one. A great pair of shoes will have me smiling all day long

Joy

Veteran

Like you, I am a 30 or 29D and have finally made peace with spending money on pretty bras, but I find that those in colors other than black, nude, or white sell out fast in our size, especially when trying to match with non thong undies. I really don't mind shopping for bras but lack of availability in B&M stores is discouraging. Most don't carry 29 or 30 bands. A friend gave me a bra catalogue that she thought would help, but their 30 band sizes only go to an A cup.

cjh

(website)

Veteran

A few reasons spring to the top of my list: current excess of demi- or push-up styles that leave more exposed on the top edges than I wish for; either not enough or way too much padding, resulting in too-sheer or mega-upholstery-style coverage; simply having to take off and put on clothes several times in the process of trying them on; the annoying little plastic bra hangers and the large tags getting in the way; the fact that I can never find previously satisfactory styles the next time I need to stock up; odd nude colors (not nude-for-me); lace which is too textured and therefore shows under smooth knits - my best fitting bras have this flaw; personal frugality - seems like I don't want to spend that much for something that does not add to my wardrobe assortment. Oh, and if I get lucky and find a good fit/style/color, there is usually only ONE there on the rack. Maddening.

Shopping for bras is WORK. Not fun, just a necessary chore.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Suja, you definitely haven't found the right bra. Your other point is interesting too though. I don't think of bras as simply utilitarian. Never have. Sleepwear - on the other hand, I think of as utilitarian.

Joy, high five to my bra and knicker twin. You have to grab and pay for our size. That solves a lot of my problem actually.

Mo, have you tried Chantelle's 30D? It does not fit me - but it might fit you.

Also, you have to launder your bras with care to keep them fitting as well as they do when you first buy them. Hand wash and dry. No buts.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Thanks, yes, I tried Chantelle as one of my first $$$ bras about 3 years ago. No go. The best fit so far has been Natori Zen 32C+ but it didn't flatter, even though it fit. Just flattened me out.

Poppy

It's not fun when you find the perfect bra only to discover it is out of stock in your size......

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Poppy, one word - eBay!

Laurinda

Veteran

I don't mind so much since I've found the bra selection and fitters at Nordstrom, but I only get there once or twice a year. I don't like spending the chunk of money (>US $50 x multiple bras) to get well-made bras in my size, so I tend to delay my purchases.

Knickers are easy enough with the selection at Tarzhay ;-).

ETA rant: And this idea that 'most women are wearing the wrong size bra' well duh, just try and find 36GG!

ironkurtin

Veteran

I don't mind shopping for bras. But when I am set, I am set, and right now -- I am set! So I don't do it very often.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Mo, Chantelle comes out with new styles each year. And fits differ. Perhaps you'll find one that works this year.

It's annoying to keep trying on bras in the fitting room - but it's like working out. It's worth it for the feeling afterwards. And as far as the expense goes - remember that you wear bras daily, and that the CPW whittles down to nothing.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Good point. I am finding that Calvin Klein is changing their fits. I tried a 32D that practically cut my air off. http://www.amazon.com/Calvin-K.....product_to Since I'm supposed to be a 30 band, that really shocked me. I sized up due to reviews.
Will re-try Chantelle next Tampa trip.

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