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Why are dresses so hard?

Peri

Veteran

Fashion articles keep talking about the ease of a dress. Yay, put one thing on and you're done. Well, i don't think it is easy at all. I just can't find one, hence yesterday's emergency.

I think I am not the right proportions for a dress. IT, medium busty, apple and long torso. Empires hit me right across the bust, waistbands end up awkwardly high, straight sheaths make me look 3 months pregnant but I'm not young enough to fool anyone, fit and flares might work but they all look so young, dresses with sleeves are often too tight in the shoulders.

Does anyone else have this many fit problems with dresses?

General

26 replies

Latest reply was from lyn*

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

Yup. I find fitting certain types of dresses a big challenge - for me, I definitely feel the 3 month belly in a sheath dress (and I get people wondering who the daddy is) - and I can relate to your shoulder troubles, and the empire waists.

I am of a similar body shape to you, my secondary body shape is a IT and I have a longer torso.

I try to stick to fit and flares in a longer torso length. Have you considered a place like eShakti? They custom make your dress to your size, and I've had some recent successes with them - I like them for the longer skirt length.

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MsLuna

Veteran

I'm IT as well but with a shorter torso. I always thought dresses were easier for you long torso people! I guess some of us have our own struggles.

Echoing what lyn says about eShakti and fit and flares. I never tried eShakti but the concept is good - customization. As for fit and flares: they definitely don't work for short torso busty IT apples like me, but give it a shot. Theoretically, the flare can balance out your IT-ness, and if the flare position is slightly higher waist, it might not hit the larger portion of the belly.

Rusty

Oh Peri, you are speaking my language. I am similar - IT, large bust, strong shoulders, long torso, apple belly. Most dresses don't work. I have almost given up and stick mostly to a pencil with some sort of structured topper. Sorry no wisdom here but will be watching to see if anyone can suggest brands that would work well for my shape.

Peri

Veteran

Interesting...I had heard of eShakti but not that they customize. I will check that out since I've tried on at least 30 lately with nothing that even felt acceptable, much less made me happy.

I love the look of fit and flare on others, but at 54 they just seem too young for me. Or I haven't found the right one.

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

Hmm, A-lines?

Diana

Veteran

Ha, did you see my post yesterday about the gaping backs on all the dresses I tried? I also have a short waist which puts most dress waists (like on fit and flares) in the wrong place. And petites are SO SHORT.

I think I am a size 4 back, size 8 bust, and size 10 hips in a sheath! Eta: and petite in the torso but regular arms and legs.

I DID eventually find a good one (the pink one I posted last night ) but you have to try on a lot of losers (seriously I was beginning to feel like a hunchbacked cow after a while) to find that one winner. Don't lose hope!

MsLuna

Veteran

I'm with Diana here! You really have to try out many different dresses (styles, fabrications, etc) to find the right ones

When I used to wear exclusively dresses, I had difficulty with most of them! The flared/a-line styles did nothing for my short torso, large bust and small back (Diana, I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN!). I finally discovered that I can exclusively wear slim cut dresses with ruching/ faux wrap/ draping or a higher waist wrap dress style. Once you find a silhouette that works, try different (detail) variations and build from there!

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Anybody who's a different size on the top than the bottom is gonna have issues with fitted dresses. I'm a pear so I have the opposite direction of problems that ITs do, but it ends up the same thing - tailored dresses never work unless I make them myself or have them altered. I can get by with some knit dresses, which give a bit more fit flexibility, and more casual styles that don't have a waist seam or waist detailing.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

If they gave us a little more length, sleeves, and sturdier fabric - dresses would be a whole lot easier for us all, Peri. And I don't mean give us more sheath dresses. It's once again a bad dress season for work appropriate dresses.

But when you DO find that dress - it's a magical item in warm weather. (I don't like to layer over dresses if I can help it). It was 89 in Seattle last week, and I could pull out a dress. Very fun.

Neel

Veteran

Yes. Dresses are very bl00dy hard! I have a very short waist and I am petite. I can never ever find a dress where the waist of the dress hits my natural waist. Give me separates any day! Have you tried the two piece dresses? I am sure they would work better for you.

sinead

I'm a pear, but still have problems finding dresses that fit right. I've decided that having things altered is the only way to go, that and trying on hundreds of dresses to find the one gem that works. I consider a perfect fitting dress to be as rare as a perfect fitting pair of jeans! I do think it gets more challenging as you get older (I'm 57) because so many dress styles are way too twee-sweet for us. Retail has such an untapped market where we're concerned.

shiny

Veteran

I'm an IT, medium busty, apple belly, and petite at 5'0, age 48. I agree that dresses can be a challenge to find. For years and years, I gave up entirely, then I started having more luck and now I have enough dresses I could go for weeks wearing a different one every day. (I haven't actually counted!)

The trick is finding your brands, and then the most flattering styles within that brand for you. The majority of my dresses are from AT / LOFT -- but that doesn't mean just any AT dress will work. Second most popular label in my dress closet is Ralph Lauren. The rest is a smattering of all sorts of brands, including Theory, Laundry, etc, etc. I own one or two BR sweater dresses but otherwise I rarely have luck with dresses at BR.

Styles that I look for include:

1. Sleeveless, or elbow length. Short sleeves cut into my upper arms and also make my shoulders look too wide.
2. No spaghetti straps
3. Scoop or V neck or draped neck (because I have a short neck)
4. Empire waist CAN work -- provided it is cut full enough in the bust, and not too full in the hips (i.e., maternity tent)
5. Ruching is my best friend -- hides belly bulges.
6. Jersey is my friend -- stretchy, forgiving, comfortable, and easy to pack, travel & wear. RL makes some of the best jersey dresses ever. I have stocked up in a variety of colors.
I have this one in two different colors:
http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/la.....ss/3713360
This one in black, and just ordered it in green:
http://www1.macys.com/shop/pro.....eath-dress

Seriously... cannot say enough good things about these RL jeresey dresses... RL understands a woman's body... I also have RL sweater dresses.

7. A line shift dresses & waist surrendering styles -- provided they are cut just so.
8. Colorblocking can do magic.
9. No inset waistbands -- my waist is too wide for them, and they rarely hit at my natural waist. A belted style can be okay, if the belt can be moved up. (My waist is fairly high up).
10. If it fits on top but is too wide in the hips, it's pretty easy to have a tailor narrow the bottom half.

dustt

Veteran

Peri - IT - long torso - medium to large bust and GIANORMOUS shoulders with a 50 year old bit of pooch - this dress is MAGIC!!

http://www.landsend.com/produc...../id_242219

comes in several colors - regular - petitie - tall & plus!!

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catgirl

Veteran

Yes, all the time. I am returning a Tahari dress today that I stalked forever because it is too tight in the shoulders. In fact the shoulders are the same in S and M. I hate buying dresses!

kkards

Veteran

Yup. I'm a tall petite with most of my height in my legs. So usually the "regular" size is to long, but the waist in the petite doesn't hit my waist. Also, I'm smaller on top, so like Diane's photos from yesterday, I have extra fabric on top.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

I guess they're hard because they have to fit all over. I'm a slightly pearish hourglass, and many dresses that fit in the top are just a wee bit snug in the hips -- just enough to be deal-breakers. And then I size up and the torso length is too long for my short waist. Oh, and then there's the whole other challenge of finding a dress long enough for my needs/wants. So you see why I jump on the chance to buy a dress when I find one that truly fits!

E

Veteran

Ugh, I have a terrible time with dresses too. None of mine are perfect: the waistband always hits too high (I'm long waisted but 5' 3" so you'd think it'd balance out but no!) and fitted dresses that fit my rear are too big in the bust (luckily I prefer fit-and-flare silhouettes). And what is up with companies lining lovely natural fabric dresses in polyester?! Acetate is fine but the poly linings make me itch. A big part of why I want to learn how to sew is to just be able to make my own dresses instead of trying on a ton and having to compromise in the end anyway!

Windchime

Veteran

I hear your frustration, Peri. As a pear, I basically take one size smaller in tops than in bottoms, which means most dresses will not fit well. Also, I haven't bought a dress for a few years because skirts have been too short for my long legs. When I do find a dress I like, I wear it for many years.

Kat

Busty IT with a short torso checking in. I love dresses... but I can't find a dress that doesn't look awful on me. If it fits my bust and shoulders, it hangs like a sack on the rest of me. And I like jersey stretchy dresses that aren't really good for altering. It's very discouraging because I really do like the dress look on others! I fall back to a skirt and top, but it's not quite the same look to my eye.

Beth Ann

Veteran

Dress fitting, and the dearth of longer, grown-up full midi skirts, makes me long for time at my sewing machine. I did seem some new wrap dresses at Talbots that looked rather promising. Strangely, they didn't show a rear view, which is really important in knit dresses!

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

I would also say - leave no retail stone unturned. I just purchased two dresses from an "elderly lady store" - in fact, my sister said the store smelled like old lady - the length was excellent and there were sleeves and the fabrication was nice (and it had a lining)! It's not my usual place to shop at all, but I found what I was looking for

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annagybe

(website)

Veteran

http://www.pendleton-usa.com/p.....SS/171678/

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

I simply love the dress that Anna found! *gush*

Peri

Veteran

Thanks everyone...glad to know it isn't just me. I will keep looking. With no deadline now I will just keep my eyes open when I shop and try on anything that looks interesting, but without the stress of the hunt.

Day Vies

Veteran

YES! I always have to get dresses with lots of stretch and no horizontal seams (Ponte knit and knit jersey are my best bets). If a dress is woven there is very little chance that it will fit off the rack. I am also not ideally proportioned for off the rack dresses but I think that's the case when you're more than a little busty. (I'm an apple with rectangular tendencies and a very ample bust line) I always have to have dresses altered -- buy it big then have it scaled down. The only time I did not have to do this is when I ordered a dress from e-Shakti.com. It was nice to take it out of the package and put it on immediately.

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

Tee hee, Day Vies and I both like eShakti