Who do you dress for?

shannon

So ladies, when you get dressed everyday do you do it for yourself, your significant other, strangers or all the above? I like my husband to think I look good in what I am wearing, and he always does, but I mainly dress for myself. If you bought something you felt great in and had a friend tell you that it looked great on you, yet your significant other thinks otherwise, would you take it back? This came up with a friend of mine today and we feel the total opposite. Just wondered what you guys thought.

18 years ago

General

6 replies

Latest reply was from Sarah

pinkcobra

Active Member

I mainly dress for myself...but I do take heed to what my friends and DH say to some extent. I can't always see every aspect of the garment, so if they told me it just really looked awful, I'd seek a second opinion and then decide.

When we were first married, we went shopping together and I held up an item I was on the fence about. When I asked him what he thought, he immediately said it was ugly...I must have looked crestfallen because he suddenly said, "I mean it's very beautiful!" We had a good laugh about it and now whenever I ask for his opinion and he doesn't like it and isn't sure if I do or not, he says it's very beautiful. Still, if I really like the item, I'll generally buy it and he usually comes around and decides that he actually does like it after I've worn it worn it for a bit.

18 years ago

Marianna

Active Member

I dress for me and how I feel in the item, but if friends say it looks awful I will listen, if they say it looks good and I don't feel good in it, I will not buy it. I can't really rely on DH's opinion...he thinks I look good in everything.

18 years ago

Sarah

Active Member

I’d say I dress both for myself and my husband. Like others have said, I tend to dress mostly for myself though. I may not be a fashion expert, but I have a whole lot more fashion sense than my husband. I love him dearly, but it’s true. : ) He wears very simple solid color or striped dress shirts with slacks that all look the alike, and he doesn’t always understand why I am not content to do the same.

That’s not to say that he dislikes my clothing style (which is a totally random mix of modern classic and artsy-eclectic), only that he doesn’t think I need new clothes until something is totally worn out. He doesn’t mind if I spend the clothing budget though.

Mostly, I buy things I like and hope he likes them too. Sometimes he has to let my more “creative” styles grow on him, but he usually likes what I wear. I have refrained from wearing two styles of popular shirt and dress because I know he can’t stand them (halter tops and the tops with harsh black lines dividing the breasts that have been so popular for the past year or so). I really don’t want to wear something that he doesn’t like at all, but I want to feel good about how I look. And it helps when he likes the way I look too. I did once, and only once, make the mistake of buy a formal gown that I loved on the hanger and loathed on my body all because he like it. I’ve worn it only twice, trying it on in the store and for him to take a picture of me in it.

18 years ago

mayapple

Active Member

You know, with few exceptions, I could never base my wardrobe on what other people think. I'll be brutally honest: I don't think 90% of my friends and family have a clue what they're talking about. I love them dearly, but not everyone is knowledgeable about fashion and not everyone views clothes the same way I do My dad, for example, just buys a size medium and wears it, regardless of how it fits. I see fashion as yet another way of expressing myself and making myself a work of art--dad sees clothes as something to keep him from being naked and cold.

Another male friend of mine thinks "fit" is just a capitalist marketing ploy that I have hopelessly deluded myself into believing. He would be happier seeing me in a sweatsuit and crocs than what I wear now. He views clothing as a political issue. I'm sure he has aesthetic opinions, but he'll never admit it.

Other people in my life care about fashion and clothes but frankly don't know much about them. I have a friend who will buy things because they're soft even if they look ridiculous on her. I know several people who hate skinny jeans on all women all the time. Replace "skinny jeans" with "swing jackets," "wide leg pants," or any other article and cut of clothing and you're bound to find people who feel that way. Personally, nothing is completely off the table for me. There are also people who see things that look good on the rack or on a mannequin and assume that it looks good on them. Also not true.

So in conclusion, unless someone has the same "values" as I do, and unless they are well-dressed and confident, there's no point in asking their opinions.

18 years ago

Nicole

Veteran

While I value the opinion of certain people in my life (my husband, my best friend, my 11 year old daughter and my mother)--I don't dress "for" them. I may ask them if they think something looks good on me, and I may let them influence what I ultimately purchase. But I don't think that seeking a trusted friend's opinion is the same as "dressing for them". I dress for the world. I want to look nice because I want people to notice me. I want men to find me attractive (shallow? maybe, but that's the truth) and I want women to admire my style and hopefully feel inspired to put a little effort into themselves. Anything doing, is worth doing well. If I'm going to get up and get dressed every day, I might as well dress well. Besides, I like to shop.

18 years ago

Sarah

Active Member

Well put Nicole. That's what I'm going for; someday I want to be like you.

18 years ago

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