What is your relationship to black clothing? - YouLookFab Forum

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What is your relationship to black clothing?

gryffin

Veteran

I have been following Sveta's coat thread and her difficulty in embracing the color black in her wardrobe. This really hit home for me, since I am pretty much her opposite. To me, black was Chanel, Audrey Hepburn, elegant, mysterious, powerful, grown up. I did not wear black as a teen, it was terrifying, much too sophisticated. Then in my 20's, I bought Liz Clairbourne black boyfriend blazer with a contrast black and white mattress stripe lining. That jacket literally changed my sartorial life. I felt professional, polished and unstoppable. From then on black became my color of choice. So much so, that in an effort to streamline and have maximum versatilty with my clothes, I now limit new purchases to black, shades of gray, silver and white. But Sveta's thread brought home how much emotion and comfort we derive from color. So my question is what is your relationship with black? And what colors that make you feel authentic, happy and powerful?

General

71 replies

Latest reply was from MsLuna

rute

Veteran

I can relate to you! I love black, I feel powerful and happy in black!

VernieJane

I also love black, and navy blue. Most of my wardrobe is dark. It does make me feel discreet but cool, in control... but when I wear colour, people are like "Wow! That looks great!" and its always just some stupid colour like pink or yellow! So black is good, but I think others see us differently than we see us, and maybe black isn't always the best option...

Deborah

Veteran

I feel authentic, happy and powerful in black :). And have done so since my early 20's. I have flirted with colour but always returned to my beloved black and now am very set in my colour palette of black, white, grey and a little navy. I sometimes use accent colours of red, cobalt and coral.

Black is all the things to me that you cite Gryffin:). And I would add "edge" to that list.

So in short my relationship with black is that of a passionate, committed love affair!

Great question and I am really glad you posted this.

Debra

Veteran

I love black too, it's simple, easy and no fuss and can be lifted with texture, print and colour.
Lots of black in my wardrobe

lyn67

Veteran

Am blonde, and low contrast so I never wore black in my teens and younger adult years, but always apreciated like a simple, elegant and powerful(+ slimming:-))statement on others. Then, I discovered the power of color blocking, bookending and textures for blacks too, so I never looked back. I love and wear lots of blacks, but do it very careful and conscious of it's disavantageous features, too.

cheryle (Dianthus)

(website)

Veteran

Black and white are my favorite neutrals but I also love color. I love to wear a black t-neck sweater with a black skirt or pants. I find it very easy to wear and don't feel it is depressing but then I don't see myself all that much during the day.

Vildy

Veteran

When I was a toddler, my father said I could have my room painted any color I wanted. My mother glared at him and said, "Don't make her promises." I knew right away what I wanted and I was elated. I pictured velvety black walls. My father said that nobody wanted a black room. I didn't know what difference that made but I certainly didn't get one. My mother had an I-told-you-so look on her face.

And I wanted a black velvet little girl's party dress. I have no idea where I saw anything like this. I didn't get one of those, either.

In college, I got off the train down south, visiting a casual boyfriend going to school there. He remarked, "What are you, an art major?" More black hate.

At one point, in my early 40's, I realized I had no black everyday clothing. I did have a couple of amazing coctail dresses, including a silk ribbon knit that might remind of something a granny would own except for the fact you could wear it nude underneath and it would flash teeny bits of skin in the interstices between stitches.

I own a lot of black jackets and coats now, black pants of every kind. Maybe one black skirt and one black stretch lace Cabi dress. The other day I realized I had not one black sweater so I bought one.

Is black still my favorite color? Almost. Perhaps I "shouldn't" be able to pull it off with my coloring but somehow it is magic on me. I wore black to our community center where there is a postal sub station. I had taken a few yoga classes there with the seniors. One looked up and exclaimed, "Black. That's your color. It brings out all your natural color." And it does. Go figure. I look healthier in black.

But probably my favorite color to be happy in is a strong pink similar to Angie's coat. I had a shantung type pantsuit in close to that color and was told by a date once that I "shouldn't" be able to wear that but somehow it looked good.
Damn straight. Amazing how other people often are so certain about what is good for you/on you.

Carla

Veteran

Black and navy blue are equally represented in my wardrobe and are the backbone along with grey, and recently white. I have just ended a 2-3 year affair with lots of colour during which I did keep up with black, but lost a lot of the navy blue. Since summer, I have almost exclusively added navy as the colour has been culled.

Black (and navy) are easy, but they aren't as evocative for me as colour. After years of avoiding anything white (mostly a 20 year habit after raising 2 boys-- kids can be so hard on white clothes!) and thinking it didn't suit my colouring, I have added a few choice items this summer (inspired by Angie and white loving Fabbers)-- and so loving it.

Wearing white clothing makes me feel powerful! Now, I am on the hunt for the perfect white jeans and or pants/ skirt and obsessed with creating a winter white capsule!

gryffin

Veteran

Wow -really great thought provoking feelings on black!! Many thanks for you insights!
Rute- Lets hear it for team black!1
VernieJane - that is very astute that people may not see us as we see ourselves. But, they are always trying to "lighten us up!!" But I guess, for me that is the authentic part of style, where we have to make a choice to be our best sartorial selves.
Deborah - edge, definitely edge!! Hey it was early in the am. It must have been a lack of caffeine to make me forget that. Dare I add just a little bit subversive? and yes passionate, exclusive, adoring....and PS no one does black and gray better than you!! Very much enjoy and look forward to your outfit posts!
Debra- yes, excellent point about texture. Love to use multiple textures and for me shade of gray (ie black light) to keep it interesting
Lyn67 - I think you have a great point deliberate, conscious choice. That we embrace the look with passion, detail and intelligence. This is not a default
Dianthus - we are on the black makes us happy team!!

Anonymous

I do love black, but I like grey even more. People always seem to remark though when I wear bright colours, like when I wore orange on Monday!

gryffin

Veteran

Vildy - wow, I so feel you pain on this. I too wanted a black velvet dress and it was not permitted. I think a black room would have been so cool. Did you ever read about Lillie Langtry's dark purple almost black dining room? If I remember the names and stories correctly the room was a disaster until her pal James McNeil Whistler came and he took fans, gilded them and placed them artfully around the room. In the process he splattered LL with gold paint, hence the line "I have gilded the Lillie" But supposed that room was the talk of Edwardian circles. So I would love to have seen your version.
Runcarla - I have a dark blue/navy/black woven jacket that is falling to pieces. Blue is my favorite color and I do wear denim. If I could find more pieces with midnight/black/sapphire and black I would consider buying them. If I was going to add any other color it would be blue!

Thistle

Veteran

I find black a good neural. Grounding and excellent for contrast. I see no reason why any color should be banished. I think of black as very French and "big city".

Aquamarine

Veteran

All black makes me look ill as I get older. Oddly enough, I prefer wearing black in the summer, when there is more skin showing (arms, scoop necks, legs).

Anonymous

I've never really looked good in black but have learned here to add some white. I also had an epiphany when realizing that there are different blacks and some look better than others. I had a black velvet two piece dress and never wore it. I finally realized that the deep black velvet was too deep a black on me, but the softer black of a blazer worked.
At this point in my life, black contrasts beautifully with my hair but it does bring out the facial wrinkles and dark circles. It's a turbulent relationship.

gryffin

Veteran

Ceit - as I keep say gray is "black lite" so I am with you on that and you wear gray well. Do you find if you are a "neutral" girl and any deviation causes an explosion of comment?
Thistle - you are very wise. No color should be banished. Excellent point.
Aquamarine - that is very interesting. I do like to wear black in the summer but I do show more skin (arms, legs), more translucent black, and swingier cuts of black. It's almost a counterpoint to the heat and bright weather.

gryffin

Veteran

Joy - excellent point about gradations in black just like their are hues in color. Washed black, charcoal, distressed will look better on certain coloring. Nothing says it needs to be obsidian...just like bright whites to cream.

Anonymous

I think I am just drawn to neutrals, but I love orange, red, and citron in particular, so I guess they are my main accent colours. I do always get tons of comments if I break out of my grey/black/navy mix

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I have mixed associations to black. It's glamour and drama, for sure -- I, too, see Audrey Hepburn and "le Smoking" -- but it can also be harsh, draining, hard.

For myself -- black is not my best neutral, but I like it and can wear it well (considering my colouring) if I wear it carefully and mindfully. Showing some skin helps, which is why it is easier in some ways in the summer, as Aquamarine mentioned. But with skin or without skin, I prefer black as an accent or as a part of an outfit to an all-black outfit -- hands down. Black with white, black with light denim or chambray, black with charcoal lace, black with ink blue -- these are some of my favourite ways to wear it.

In fact, I don't care for all black on myself or on others as a rule. Partly because it's so often the urban default (on people it doesn't necessarily flatter). But also because, by the end of our long winter, as I mentioned on Sveta's thread, my soul craves colour and light. Not just on me, but on anyone. I get so tired of the endless variations of soot.

There are exceptions to this. There are some women with bright silver or white hair who look stunning in all black or mostly black. And when it's worn like this in a highly intentional way, I can appreciate it.

For myself, "power" colours include cranberry red, fuchsia, and almost any shade of blue.

Anonymous

I agree with Suz. And since my personal coloring is soft, black doesn't look the least bit good near my face. Still, there are times when I use black to add drama to an outfit. I just have to use it judiciously, away from my face and in combination with my best colors. I hate seeing so many women default to black (particularly head to toe) when it's obviously not a color that truly flatters them. We all know people who really shouldn't wear black at all.

Anonymous

Excellent. We go way back.

Diana

Veteran

I love black. It's my favorite neutral, and extremely well represented in my closet. It goes with almost everything else I own. I probably wear something with black in it 90% of the time. That said, I rarely wear head to toe black, although I actually look good in it (It is my natural hair color after all.). But I guess monochrome anything in any color is just not really my style.

RunswithDolphins

This fall I am again embracing black in my wardrobe. After 26 years of golden retrievers I am currently without my best and most loving friend. I absolutely adored my 2 beautiful golden girls but my next dog will definitely be a non-shedder. In the meantime I am thrilled to be able to wear black again. I do, however, find all black on me is too much and needs to be broken up with a pop of colour, or even a muted grey, at the neckline.

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

Black will always be the backbone of my wardrobe. I've always worn it but less so when I was younger and colored my hair. Now that I've gone au naturel with my hair color and am embracing the silver that runs through it, I find that black looks even better on me now than before. Black and white is and will always be my all time favorite color combination to wear. I don't see that changing any time soon.

Alassë

Veteran

I wear dark brown instead of black, and definitely like that, but I do receive "that's boring" comments. In fact, I don't have a high tolerance for all dark brown outfits; a few per season is quite enough. Best color may be medium/mossy green.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

I love black. Always have, and probably always will.

I'm finding I have to be a little more careful with it as I'm getting older. I tried on a black turtleneck recently and did not like how the extreme contrast with my skin emphasized my sagging jawline. But I don't wear turtlenecks very often anyway.

I also love grey and have gained appreciation for navy, so I don't gravitate as exclusively towards black as I once did. Still, I am guessing I will always wear it.

Neel

Veteran

I can't wear all black outfits because they feel boring to me. I like to have my regular dose of colour without which I feel drab!

gryffin

Veteran

Ceit - you look fabulous in brights. I really like Thistle's comment that no color need be banished from our wardrobes.
Suz - you are wise. You have to know yourself and know your likes. You looking stunning in your power colors. I think the trick for all of us is to find the colors that make our heart sing and enjoy them, dark, light, bright, muted. There is no right or wrong, just what is right for us at the time
Ruth - so important to know what looks good for your coloring and makes you feel great
Zapotee - we embrace our dark side!!
Diana - you do look wonderful in black and brights. You have a great balance!
Runswithdolphins - so sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved fur baby. Dogs are really gods love made manifest on earth. I have three standard schnauzers, who I adore, so this means the hair all over my clothing is color coordinated at least!! They are so worth it!
Shannon - you look amazing in black as well as color!! I love watching you swap it up!

JAileen

Veteran

I have some holiday clothes that are black - velvet tops, dressy skirts, etc. For everyday, I rarely wear black. I prefer brown, green, and blue. Black always made my hair look washed out. Now that I've gone silver, maybe it won't look so awful on me. I have found that taupe is a new favorite. Anyway, I found a pewter grey velvet top for parties this year.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

I wore black a lot as a teen in the pre grunge days (early 80's). Even black fingernail polish, the works. I was bad-a** lol.
Then I didn't really think about it one way or the other while working in an office for the next 4 years.
Once I started working in food and beverage, all of a sudden black became a uniform requirement. I started buying items that could do double duty as work clothes and play clothes. I was in my 20's and there was lots of playing lol.
But after 10, 15 years of black as a necessity, I found I didn't want to buy it on my own if it wasn't going to be used for work. I'd gotten 'blacked out' so to speak. Not until just a few years ago, after YLF, have I embraced it again. That's two-fold. One, because I decided to ditch brown in favor of black as a dominant neutral, and, two, because I want a more rock n roll vibe and black certainly lends that.
As for whether it's good on my coloring, I think I'm still okay. I don't wear head to toe black and I still like bright jewel tones. I think of it more as a support color, not one I'm drawn to per se.

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