Talking through tough stuff. TW: child sexualization

I assume readers on this blog will generally be opposed to these dolls, bt would be interested in hearing arguments for them. Life is becoming so polarized, and because we “live” so much online now, it’s easy to ignore what we dislike/disagree with. On an individual basis, that’s fine, bt it does nothing to help us out as a society or to resolve difficult issues. Even getting them removed from stores where we live has limited impact, because it doesn’t touch the mindsets of people who would buy these for their kids if they were on the shelf, and they can always be sold in different outlets. The problems of “grooming”, of body image, of how we teach girls and women to value themselves go right on while we tastefully look the other way. How can we do better?

These dolls would be disturbing if they were not so simply strange. I tried to find the dolls on the manufacturers website, but could not. It was very crowded with mostly pix of dolls and their accessories, but also some little kids wearing so many items it seemed like the girls were the accessories & not the other way around.

https://mailchi.mp/0aa469b5029.....9a0a836b5d

https://www.lolsurprise.com/?p.....=438781870

What do you think? I see no problem with sexy lingerie. But lingerie on little kids is not sexy, and lingerie on pudgy little dolls that look like toddlers isn’t either.

I’m not raising girls. My son has been taught to respect girls and women, and I believe he truly does. The challenge for him is moving in a world where people he interacts with might have damaging ideas about girls and women, and he needs to know how to respond.

ETA in response to Phoebe’s comment: the strange/disturbing thing about this article is that it is about the dolls I mentioned, shaped like chubby toddlers and wearing lingerie. The “lingerie on little kids” I mentioned is not exactly shown, as the girls show very little skin, yet their accessories suggest sexuality.
The article is by a concerned blogger and includes a link to an earlier article she wrote about dolls (for little kids) that are somehow sexual.

There could be lots of things to discuss here. I mention my son because the angle I find most interesting is how we discuss ways to teach kids to look at themselves and others. Now that he’s 18, we are supposedly past that, but the dolls represent ways of thinking about kids and about sexuality. If we are going to get past building walls and build a stronger society, we have to be ready to deal with very different thinking than our own.

3 years ago

Anonymous

I wish you had given a little more information about the subject matter because I regret following the link.

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

I don't even know what to say to this... as I am 62 and have no children. I am completely mystified and yes this lingerie doll seems inappropriate. This could be an intentional "shock" toy to get more free media/publicity for the brand "LOL Surprise!", which has been around since 2016. This is the same company behind Bratz dolls so they know a thing or two about hyper sexualization. (I had to look up the brand, here's an interesting article from The Atlantic.)

https://www.theatlantic.com/te.....ys/576970/

Stagiaire Fash

Cocolion, thanks for the article. I have heard of Bratz, but had no idea there was a connection.

Yikes! I'd guess adults would buy as gag (literally) gifts? Just...no....

Lucy

I think what Phoebe meant is that this issue can be triggering for some readers, and should probably come with a content warning. Readers can then choose to read on (knowing they might face something disturbing), or scroll on by. It allows readers that choice.

I agree that this is highly distasteful, even offensive. Anything that desensitises us to child sexualisation, or which might be used as a tool for grooming, is not a good thing. Pressure on social media might perhaps get the product off the shelves - or it might act as an advertisement to it.

Maybe adding CW (content warning) to the title would be a good idea.

lyn67

Disturbing- and very inapropiate- , and hope I am not prude but refuse to charge my thoughts with trash- so am with Phoebe-and Lucy. Now- unfortunately they gained a few views more... :-(.

Thanks Lucy. Does the new intro help?

Lyn67, I empathize with that self-preservation instinct, but also disagree with it. Lots of things are disturbing,; they don’t cease to exist when we look away. In my case, the triggering content i avoid is videos of cops abusing Black people—but if something is so awful I can’t watch it, then I see it as something I need to be informed about and work against. I think it’s good that George Floyd and Amoud Arbory’s deaths got so many views, because it seems that those videos are what many people needed to wake up to a very old problem. We still have people who insist it isn’t a big issue. Simply disconnecting from them allows the violence to go on. That’s an entirely different issue than these dolls, but I hope you see the parallel I’m making.

Bijou

Creepy! Keeping children and teens safe from bad online content is a mine field for parents of both genders. At least in the old days there was a limit to the toys the local toy shop would stock.

Synne

Lyn67: "but refuse to charge my thoughts with trash".
I'm stealing this quote. Love it!

I didn't click the link, but know of the dolls you are referring to FashIntern. This company (Bratz) is notorious in sexualizing children. Really awful and offensive.

But is this fashion related?

RobinF

I always hated the Bratz dolls and refused to buy any for my daughter. I didn't click on the links though so can't say about these in particular.

Synn, shaping self-image and our relation to the world around us through attire is fashion. The dolls are a step removed from that, but still address those central issues.

nemosmom

Maybe this should be off-topic, not the main forum.

Joy

Girls, at a rather young age, need to learn that men are turned on visual ly in a way that women are not. They need to realize that they must dress more modestly than they may want to, but they probably won’t get it. They need to learn that it is ok to say no to anything that seems weird, no matter how elevated the perp’s status is.
Guys need to realize that having explicit photos on their phone, no matter that they have done nothing, can get them years in prison and the label of sexual predator for life. A felony. He will not be able to live several places and may have to register as a sexual predator any new place that he moves. Don’t ask how I know this but it is a fact.

rachylou

This reminds me of my mother: When I was little she had a secretary. A very nice lady, but she was raising her girls... well, all they thought about was makeup and boys and dressing for men. They were all very very nice tho, and the girls, who were much older than me, loved me and wanted to babysit me. My mother let them, but I remember her driving me over and telling me their behavior was trash and I was NEVER to aspire to that. I was maybe 3-4, because I don’t believe my brother was born yet. In any case, I actually remember that... it really stuck.

... and I think my mother probably learned when my brother was born that is a socially dangerous thing to tell a small child. Probably any other child would have gone in and said, ‘My mom says you’re trash.’ Lol

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