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Wardrobe Basics - Should I Buy a Black or Neutral Suit?

ElleH

Veteran

I lost weight & had to do a major purge last year. I was able to keep jeans, blazers, shirts, dresses & coats as a more fluid fit & because some were bought on the way to my current weight, but I had to get rid of all skirts & trousers. I bought some new casual trousers for work in cropped lengths & the grey dot BR Angie pick ones are my only longer pair for Winter. I have no dress pants, no black pants, no pencil skirts or skirts at all except the striped shiny midi. I bought the Halogen black & cream striped midi like Angie has (pic. 1). It is the only skirt I own. I am more of a jeans girl but have cropped loose chinos for Summer or where jeans are too casual BR sloans for Spring/Fall & the longer BR ones I mentioned for Winter, all for work when I think jeans aren't appropriate. I am self employed & mostly need/wear casual clothing or business casual. I do not have a need to wear suits for work.

Question 1- Do I need a pencil skirt, trouser, sheath dress & blazer in a matching fabric and colour from Theory? I love their pieces. I would get a dark neutral. I only own an orange linen sheath, not a dark one. Do I need all of these? I rarely wear skirts at all & wouldn't wear a dark sheath much but every one needs just one right? Court, weddings, funerals, parties when you have nothing else because you are on a trip & don't have your entire wardrobe. These could be mixed in ways that are less business looking too. I have plenty of fun purses & shoes. I would need to make sure I have the right tops to not orphan the skirt.

Question 2 - Given that I do not own a black pant or skirt should I get black? I do own LBD but it has spaghetti straps. I'm not sure if it is an any occasion dress. I do own black blazers. I was thinking of ink or charcoal. Leaning more towards ink than charcoal as I could wear it in spring with light accessories. I know many of us love ink as a fresh alternative to black, myself included, but as I said I have no black pants, skirts or LBDs that can go to a funeral or court without a jacket. Having said that I do have black blazers. If I do get all of the pieces should they all be the same colour or should I get 2 or 3 pieces as a suit and one other in another colour?

I don't like how lint & cat hair look on black & ink either. The charcoal is better for this but the suiting fabric isn't too much of a lint magnet & I won't be wearing these pieces every day.

Shouldn't everyone have 1 black pant, 1 black pencil skirt, 1 versatile LBD?

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Latest reply was from catgirl

Liz

Veteran

No, there is no need for everyone to own black pants, a black pencil skirt, and a LBD.

These items sound like a want for you, not a need. That doesn't mean you shouldn't buy, just that you should buy what you really want, not what you think you might need or what someone else might say you need.

jenanded

Veteran

I love a suit, as you say for back up, broken up, and for full armour. A charcoal suit works w lint, your other dark pieces, and is serious enough on its own. I would get the charcoal! Enabling here! And get all the pieces. You may regret it otherwise and you do need dress and skirt backups even if it is from time to time.

PalmFronds

I vote charcoal or another pseudo neutral like burgundy! Not a huge fan of black suits myself unless you REALLY have a dress code that dictates it or look amazing in black. A suit of separates is always good to have as long as you wear all the pieces. Otherwise, as I found, you end up laundering one or two pieces more and one year later the colors don't quite match... Oh the vexing horror

Louise

Veteran

I think it's important here that you said you rarely wear skirts and wouldn't wear a sheath much, and given that you don't need a suit for work I'd say you probably don't need any of it? It would be awful to spend your hard earned pennies on things you're not going to wear much?

I don't have a black pencil skirt, smart black trousers or a traditional LBD as they don't fit my needs. For funerals/ formal events I have a black jersey wrap dress. It's very versatile as I can dress it up with an ink or grey jacket for funerals, or dress it down with a faux fur vest or denim jacket for evenings out. I then have several party type dresses.
Hope that helps x

ElleH

Veteran

Jenanded I agree. It isn't that I would wear them often but that one needs just one outfit they could wear to a funeral etc. My wool winter coat is charcoal grey for lint reasons and I do like charcoal but I am wondering if it can be dressed up as a separate for evening the way black or ink can. Do you think it can or will it look like I came from work?

ElleH

Veteran

Louise you are making sense. I could just get a black sheath to be like your wrap dress & dress it up & down with different non matched jackets. Although I won't wear black to a wedding so an ink one would do for a wedding or a funeral. That is where I start thinking a dress in black & skirt & blazer in ink haha. I already have black blazers. I have all these crazy thoughts & can see why women have many clothes. Can one live without a suit? I guess. Angie has one though. Hmmm....I love Theory & they have a sale right now. I usually settle for BR separates but if money were no issue I'd buy Theory.

kkards

Veteran

I'm a firm believer that every grown up should have an appropriate funeral/interview outfit. These are not situations that need the extra stress of having to find something to wear at the last minute. That being said, many funerals and some job interviews don't require a suit anymore. So the if you "need" one, is hard to answer. As for color, I'd stay with black, or navy as IMO they will stay current longer and work best in the most conservative environments, but can be lighten up with accessories and/ or shirt. If you get a suit,always remember to dry clean both pieces together (even if you wore them as separates).

ElleH

Veteran

So I am thinking that I do need at least some of the pieces for a possible last minute funeral, interview etc. I guess the question is then if I don't need all 4 pieces in the same colour should I possibly get an ink bottom & blazer & a black sheath to wear with existing black jackets or if I decide to get all 4 just go ahead & get all in the same colour? Sorry for so many questions. I have been trying to figure it out on my own for days. I really do think this is why women have so many clothes. Black for funerals, other colours to avoid boring black & lint the rest of the time or if you refuse to wear black to weddings. Pants for when it is cold, skirts & dresses for when pants feel not dressy enough. Sigh...Weight loss really means starting over with one's wardrobe but I want to do it thoughtfully.

If I can find an affordable (I tend to love the Saint Laurent ones lol) but stunning black tuxedo suit like Emmanuel Alt wears I would love one of those & wouldn't feel business or boring in black in this. Perhaps I should save black for that & maybe buy a black sheath dress & buy a skirt or pantsuit in ink. I had a black Theory Betty sheath that was useful. I rarely wore my black pencil skirt. I could just get a nay pantsuit I guess. Maybe the sheath with an un-matching jacket would do for when pants seem too casual. I'm just worried that one day I want a skirt suit not unmatched dress & jacket. And...it is all on sale right now. Another thought is that pencil skirts never date but pant silhouettes change. Maybe I need the pencil skirt to match the suit sheesh, so much to think about.

jenanded

Veteran

I still vote charcoal ... unless social norms where you live differ to where I am, charcoal still is formal and respectful enough. My friend is in exact position as you, and then she also does her charcoal with pretty mint, fuschias, blues, creams etc... Charcoal also blends easily with easier to buy black, and navy.

kkards

Veteran

Elle, I'll be honest with you,I don't see the need for a shift dress or skirt at all, I've honestly not been in a situation were a shift dress or pencil skirt was more appropriate then a suit. But that's just me,and also because I don't wear pantyhose, and I would never go to a job interview with bare legs. And I would get a separate dressy something for a wedding.

ElleH

Veteran

kkards do you mean a pantsuit when you say suit?

kkards

Veteran

Sorry, I do. I know that you could get a suit with a pencil skirt, sometimes I let my personal preference get in the way, as I said, I don't wear panty hose..

Louise

Veteran

How about a navy dress? Suitable for a funeral but fine for an interview, court appearance, wedding..... Not necessarily a sheath dress either could be fit & flair, empire, depends on what suits your figure? X

Anonymous

Unless you can rock black, charcoal or another neutral is much better. Think of LBD as "Little Basic Dress" rather than "Little Black Dress." My LBD is gray and is perfectly suitable for any occasion, including a funeral.

Not everyone needs a suit, but if you find one that fits you perfectly in your best neutral, go ahead and get it. You can always break the pieces up.

unfrumped

Veteran

Ha, the great recommendation for a "suiting suite" of matching items just slays me because I can never find any brand in which all of these items would fit me in the same clothing line and fabric. And really it is hard to find very many brands that offer this whole package.

I agree with others, decide first if black is "your" color. Sure, it's in the French wardrobe mantra, but I wouldn't invest in it if I looked way better in another color that is available. OTOH, sometimes black basics fit in well enough and still allow good use of more flattering colors in tops, scarves, so that you get the best of both worlds.

That said, to me it's more about what brands of clothing fit you and are in your fabrics. If Theory "gets you" and you had the opportunity to buy a matching set, then that could make sense because you're investing in the style and fit, not just buying a set to have one.

And if you plan to "break them up" more than wear together, then you don't need them in matching fabric but need the best fits and proportions for you.

I think funerals are easier to dress for than weddings. That may say something about my wardrobe! It's just that I don't think you have to wear a black dress or suit to a funeral--to me, any conservative dark neutral dress or pants/jacket is acceptable. Even a conservative print in conservative style with a jacket or nice cardigan over. Hope I'm not out of touch there but that's been my experience so far.

Staysfit

Veteran

Elle, I'm in agreement with everyone who says you do not need a LBD or a dark suiit. I just took my two LBD's to a resale shop, unworn, and with the tags still hanging on them. They will be a great find for someone! I basically eliminated all darks from the closet, not because of weight loss, but because of my color change. I am also starting again. I did buy a charcoal sheath. I also purchased a gray lace pencil skirt. I am not sure what purpose a suit would have in my life. I live in a fairly informal community. I like sheath dresses and pencil skirts- which is the only reason I purchased them.

For funerals, I have always made due with what is in my closet. I don't worry about whether it is dark, or somber looking. I wore a marine blue silk dress to my brother-in-law's funeral. My sister-in-law wore a light gray suit. I like to think he was watching us! He had a great sense of humor and would probably love that we stood out among the sea of black I actually like that silk dress for funerals and have continued to wear it, more times than I would like to say. (I have been to 5 funerals this year.) I think it's important to be comfortable at a funeral, especially if you plan to go graveside. Nothing too short, tight, skimpy, no high heels. Oh, and I learned from experience to bring proper outdoor gear - sunglasses, rain gear, and even sun screen. The bottom line is to just look neat and presentable. No one should remember or talk about what you wore. If they do, they are the one with the problem, not you!!

Elly

Veteran

I think a simple skirt and pair of trousers in your neutral goes a long way. I have a black pencil and a black pair of dress slacks and with a combo of tops can go from a funeral, to a gallery opening, to a glitzy christmas party, to an interview in those 2 pieces. A suit can be nice, but only if you love and will wear both pieces independently (i.e. the jacket is the right length for what you will wear it with most) and are committed to never wearing the suit together or willing to clean both pieces at the same time. If you won't wear it together you might have better luck finding a great blazer and a great skirt that both fit and can "go" as a mismatched suit or be worn alone, as this is a much more casual look, but would probably be more appropriate for what you'd wear it for. I have black because it is my fave neutral, but grey, ink, dark purple even are good options.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

"O reason not the need..."

Seriously, when the "perfect wardrobe" bug hits us, it's so hard to determine needs from wants -- or even passing whims!

As someone who is also self-employed (for the most part), living in a casual (but colder) community, and in general "more of a jeans girl" I also understand the yen for a suit. And for a "suite." It's really nothing different than the "core of 4" idea and similar -- that basic capsule that is supposed to take us to every possible occasion. It's the dream of the dream wardrobe, in short.

And yet, if you don't live a corporate life, running from formal office to cocktail reception to a city dinner out to a theatre and home again, do you really need to dress as if you do? And will you? Are those clothes actually comfortable enough or even practical for the life you live?

I started to have an easier time with this when I acknowledged that for me, comfort and practicality were definitely part of the equation. Or ought to be. I liked the idea of myself in a beautiful pencil skirt....and I even liked the look of it, walking around a city on holiday, perhaps....but curling up on my sofa in one was another story.

Then I remembered that for me, denim was a neutral. And while I'm hardly going to wear a "Canadian tuxedo" of denim jacket with denim jeans, my denim can work in with ink and navy for a more casual take on the "suit." I got myself an ink blazer and wear it with denim all the time.

Still, I also bought an actual suit -- in taupe. Which is one of my "light" neutrals. It's a pant suit. I bought it because:

Suits fit my style persona.
Occasionally I give appearances and sometimes this is a really great item to pull out to wear (not that I've worn it as such yet -- bought it in April.)
I can (and do) wear the jacket and pants as separates.

In a pinch I could wear this suit to an interview (which I can't imagine having) or to a funeral -- although it is light, it could be worn with a dark top and it communicates respect and calm.

For the possible funeral, I also have a black Halogen seamed pencil skirt (lined ponte) that I could wear with a black jacket or a dark blouse. And a sleeved navy dress.

The thing is, I hardly ever wear either of those items.

I don't consider them a waste -- I bought the dress on sale and it is flattering and can also take me to winter weddings and similar. It feels a bit "corporate" for a date night, but it's certainly elegant and "appropriate."

As for the skirt, it was not expensive in the first place, and I did "casualize" it with denim and leather a fair bit in its first year, and could do so again -- I just haven't really had any interest in doing so because I have other items in the closet I'd rather play with.

This isn't really answering your question, is it?

Let me offer this, then. Before buying any of these things, I guess I would ask yourself:

What are the occasions that I need something for?
How often do those occasions come up?
How likely is it that I would use any of these items in any other way (remix them)?
Do I need something else a whole lot more?
What is the value of the "peace of mind" to me -- of having these in my closet?

For me, the answers were something like the following:

The occasions I would genuinely "need" a suit were few -- maybe once a year, in fact -- but seemed pressing when they did occur.
It was VERY likely I would remix the jacket and wear it frequently. (I do).
I could afford it at the time I bought it and didn't need something else a lot more or have to give up something else I wanted to get it.

Plus, it was on sale.

Oh, and Angie told me to get one. She knew my style well enough to know it would pay for itself in some kind of closet happiness -- even if not technically in cost per wear.

cheryle (Dianthus)

(website)

Veteran

I read your original message and it doesn't sound like you "need" any of the more formal wardrobe trappings. I have found that even funerals are no longer as formal as they once were. A dress in any non-bright color would be fine for most funerals. Why buy a suite or suit for just in case when it may not be to your taste if/when you need to pull it out. I used to buy dresses for those anticipated occasions and then realized that most of the time I was buying something specific for the event and not wearing the back-up ready to go dresses.

If you do decide to get the suit, a pant suit is probably enough for your needs. I would go with a color that you have always liked rather than one that is "in" as you may have the suit for quite some time.

thimblelina

(website)

Veteran

Ink can go to a court or funeral too. I vote for ink, unless the perfect black suit just jumps off the hanger & assaults you!

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

I can speak to the need for funeral wear, recently, unfortunately. My uncle's funeral was attended by church-going Southerners, not the most casual crew, but even there I didn't see any ladies wearing suits. One or two might have worn structured dresses, but for the most part it was separates or knit dresses. I think my female cousins all wore dresses, as did my aunt, but not businessy sheath ones. There's possibly an urban/rural divide here but I agree with others that funerals aren't as dressy as they used to be. I suspect that you can find something suitable (ha) amongst your current clothes if you need to.

I was flying and traveling super-light so I took a black blazer which I wore as a jacket but also gave me the option to have a more suit-like vibe. On the day of the funeral I wore a black knit skirt and a sweater with the blazer, and the next day for the graveside service I wore black pants and a button-front shirt. (I went with only black bottoms so I could wear the same pair of shoes the whole trip. Normally these days I don't wear that much black.)

I don't own a suit, but I do own blazers and skirts that I could wear together. I work at home and live in an area where even job interviews are pretty casual, so I don't really need a dark suit per se. That's not to say that you wouldn't use the pieces and be able to remix them in your wardrobe, but I'm not sure that it makes sense to spend a lot of time and money on them based on your description of your life. They could always be back-burner pieces that you keep an eye out for on sale, or whatever.

DonnaF

Veteran

At the So. Cal funerals I've attended, I don't recall a single woman wearing a suit and quite a few were not wearing black or navy. At the memorial services in Nor. Cal, it was the same. And at one, we were instructed to wear our favorite sweater because the deceased always wore a sweater knit by his wife. And at another, we were to dress in honor of St. Patrick's Day.

I doubt I wore my LBD more than once per year, so after I got rid of that one I never bought another. I rarely reach for my black Halogen pencil skirt because it seems so formal. A few months ago, I bought a black scuba ponte skirt and that gets more use because it is more casual. My more formal black jackets/blazers never get worn and seem a bit harsh. Black trousers are quite fussy as to which shoes will work, so my feet have to be in the mood for that heel height, and my mind has to be in the mood for that pant silhouette -- which means I usually reach for something else.

Long story short: What one or more people deem to be necessities are not my necessities in the life I happen to lead. I tend to dress up a tiny bit for my environment which tends to be very casual. If I wore any of the Big Law uniform pieces described, even broken up, I would feel very, very uncomfortable and out of place. So they would hang in my closet unworn. YMMV.

catgirl

Veteran

I got a Theory suit in a sort of heathered ink blue and I LOVE it. I rarely wear it as a suit now, but if I needed it, it would be perfect for any occasion requiring a suit. Black was too BLACK, even though it's my color.

ElleH

Veteran

Una I'm glad you chimed in. I think you have several Theory suits right? I know you are a black lover but you didn't buy black. I think I will save black for the right affordable Le Smoking I hope to find. Ink or charcoal I'm deciding between. I think charcoal mixes better with black pieces. Ink is OK with black sometimes but the ink I'm looking at is almost black so that it would look like I'm wearing 2 unmatching blacks together. What were the heathered ink pieces you got? I'm considering pieces in the "Uniform" colour.

catgirl

Veteran

Not several , just one! And a couple of blazers.