Please help: I need versatile evening gowns with longevity.

DH is a US Marine which means that every November we have at least one and sometimes more formal Birthday Balls to attend. They're great fun but cause SOOO much stress when it comes time to finding something to wear. I need to be elegant but don't want to look boring; young (I'm 26) but not trashy; stylish & fun but not too attention getting. I think you get the picture from there. We also seem to have a few military weddings a year. Then there are things like Dining Outs, occasional evening/holiday parties and a few other random events. In the past I've hit the sales racks and grabbed whatever was there & fit. I can't look back and remember a dress I felt really, really great in. For the few months I've been here at YLF I've developed some higher standards so I feel I need to spend more time & effort looking fabulous for these events; this means my formal wear capsule needs some SERIOUS upgrading! I'd like to find one or two (or maybe three long dresses and a shorter dress or two. Ideally they will be simple but appropriate dresses that I can really change up with accessories (belts, shoes, necklaces, wraps/shawls, etc). We move every 2-4 years so each place I go my dresses will be brand new to the people we're currently stationed with! Did I also mention there needs to be a certain comfort level b/c these events often (99% of the time) involve formal ceremonies with sitting then standing the sitting and speeches then dinner then dancing? I've picked out a few from Nordstrom's and will start the buying & returning process now so that I have time before the ball to be really, really happy with at least one dress. My wonderful DH is not well versed in women's formal wear so I need my fellow YLFers! I'm a pretty pear with a little hourglass (especially once the last of the baby weight goes away). Please be as honest as possible. My clothing budget is tight but this is a very important capsule for me and I want the best looking dress I can get. Thanks in advance. Here are the ones I'm considering right now.

1) I think this is my favorite one right now b/c of the options is allows. I'd have it hemmed to a bit below the knee/mid-calf. My biggest concern is if the fabrication looks to casual. http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/29.....viewAnchor

2) This one has the simplicity that would make it really versatile. I keep seeing a really thin metallic belt in the middle of the sequined waist. It also comes in navy which might be a nice alternative to have. http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....0&P=2
http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/29.....uct-_-Auto

3) This looks like a longer version of #1 but dressier. I really do like the wider shoulder. It gets cold in grand ballrooms!
http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/31.....0&P=1

4) Something a little different but I worry it is too "young." http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....0&P=2

5) I'm not 100% sure about this dress. There is something about it I really do like but is it too bright & not versatile enough? http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....0&P=1

6) This is a shorter dress that reminds me of Angie's formal denim shirt blog. I definetly couldn't wear denim to most of my events but I still love the dress! I also think it would be great for my pear shape. http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/29.....8&P=1

7) This dress would be for the less formal events but it is one of my favorites. There is something elegant & sophisticated about it. I'd wear it everyday and not minding wearing Spanx with it! http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....uct-_-Auto

Sorry this is so long. I've spent the past 6 years being uncomfortable and stressed out over my attire. Tears were a common occurance! I'd really like to avoid that from here on out!

15 years ago

rute

Veteran

My favorite is no. 7!!!!!!!!! I want one!

I think no. 2 will be a good option for a formal event, it long, slim and the color is more flattering than black (it's a good color for you)!

You could buy no. 2 for another occasion..

bj1111

the primary difference between the dresses, besides long/short, is the shape of the skirt--flared/straight.

so for the long dress, my fav is #2. the pleating on the bodice and the sequins at the waist really sell the dress to me. getting it in another color besides black is the icing. plus the bottom should be pretty forgiving for pear/hourglass girls like us. the calvin klein #1 is good too if you're seeking a more columnar shape. #5 seems mob to me.

for the short dress, hands down #7, just as versatile as #1, dressier for (semi)formal events. #1 is too ordinary.

have you considered a long balltype skirt in black with tailored white shirt in a slim fit and dressy fabrication?

also, try jcrew bridal. you can search by shape or material or length.

FiestyWife

Active Member

I found this one as well. Its like #7 but the sleeves & back are solid, not sheer. http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....6&P=1

Katja

(website)

Maybe your hesitation about #5 is that it is shown styled with sandals? Different shoes would up the formality.

Sveta

I like #7 as a cocktail dress, however the skirt may be too tapered for pear shape. You just need to try it on and see. Otherwise it is a very gorgeous dress.
I also like #3 as a formal gown and the skirt shape is very flattering on pear shape.
I would discard #3 as not flattering shape for a pear. Pear + long and columnar skirt = disaster
I am not sure about #6 for pear also. Skirt is not really A-line but gathered at the bodice which can give additional volume where you really do not need it. Angie's dress is a flare style where it is skimming hips and then flares away. That is the most flattering style for a pear!
Also how about venturing into some colors flattering on you? You do not want all your dresses to be black... I would go for deep jewel colors for a formal wear if you can wear them - emerald green , cobalt blue, wine red, deep violet - whatever works for you.

I wouldn't be opposed to buying jewel tones. In fact I love them! #7 doesn't come in any other color but #2 does come in navy. A dress in eggplant would be wonderful...

the solid option (papell) on the shutter pleated dress is not as formal as the original sheer back option. the papell had a weird belt. it's a work-to-dinner dress, rather than a cocktails/reception dress.

definitely try on the original #7. it may not flatter a pear, then again it may.

Michelle

Lacey, just had to chime in and offer hugs through this process. I don't know if you were around when I was going mad with cocktail attire, but it was recent and not that much fun (until we got sorted, of course)! And the ladies will be great for that.
I would like to suggest targeting colours you want to incorporate. That may make the search seem a little less daunting. I believe one of your cocktail dresses should be in a dark, dressy neutral that works for you(if black isn't your thing, do chocolate brown, ink blue, silver grey etc). So when people suggest your little black dress, you'll have your personal version sorted out.
I also second jewel tones very enthusiastically, particularly for one of your long formal gowns and one of your cocktail options. You mentioned you like eggplant, so that's a possibility. How do you feel about emerald green? Sapphire blue? A brighter purple? Red of any shade? Fuchsia?
How do you feel about black and white/cream? Or metallics? Hard to get much more chic than a beautifully-fitted silver or gold frock that you can then punch up with accessories of any colour.

You're very smart to tackle this early. When you do find dresses you love and that make you feel fabulous, I bet you'll enjoy the events so much more! Dressing up is supposed to be fun, and we'll do our best to make it that way for you.

Scarlet

The first two have a nice shape but are relatively plain. There is something about #3 that I don't like--it's TOO modest? #4, eh. #5 and 6 are too old for you. #7 is gorgeous. Is there a BCBG where you live? They used to do really gorgeous gowns and their sales can be good. You are only 26! Show off your youth and beauty!

Oh, and have you checked out Angie's post about channeling a specific era when choosing your timeless party wear?
http://youlookfab.com/2009/11/.....ess-frock/

The point about texture probably goes some way to explaining why the wheer back and sleeves elevate the formality of the one dress. That will also be a key consideration if you decide to make one of your cocktail outfits a skirt/top combo.

Michelle, I love the two cocktail dresses you ended up with. The blue one is such a beautiful color! I would absolutely get a dress in eggplant or a deep blue. The trouble is finding one that is sophisticated enough and versatile enough to be changed up with accessories year after year.

The women's attire is VERY noticed at the events that I attend. I want to stand apart, and in a good way, from the other women wearing trashy prom dresses or super dowdy gowns. I'm drawn to the simpler designs with some WOW accessories. Its also a lot easier to get my husband to buy shoes & a purse than a whole new gown!

lynne

I actually tried on #7 for a recent event, and it was not flattering to anyone even remotely pearish. It was a bad day for my self esteem
I love #2. Let us know what you decide, and pictures please!

Thanks for the heads up Lynne. I was oh so tempted to give #7 a try first because I just love the banded style. It is all over Hollywood right now... I'm going to go with the navy #2 first. I'll be ordering shortly and putting up pictures as soon as I get it. Thanks for all your help.

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