Biscuitsmom, I too wanted to offer up hugs and support. I 100 per cent empathize with how you're feeling. I am facing the need for a tripple digit weight loss, which often leaves me feeling dreadful about my body and my overall appearance, not to mention angry with myself for failing to maintain my optimal health...But this forum has proven to me that it *is* possible to feel good about your looks, regardless of size. It may not last all week or even all day, but it can happen, and it is truly empowering. Overhauling a wardrobe involves a great deal of courage, since it necessitates opening yourself up to input from others (be they your husband, online acquaintances like us, or even salespeople at a store). I have had to rely on others all the way through life when it comes to aesthetic matters, and while it can be difficult, I can honestly say it's well worth it. I also know you dont' lack for courage -- the way you handled Biscuit's illness speaks volumes there. You have the inner resources to make life better.
Kristen is absolutely right -- don't fret about size, simply buy what fits. I had to do size up recently, and while I felt a pang every time I tried on a larger garment, it was more than balanced by the confidence I experienced once I put the items on and got out into the world again.
Melissa is also spot on.strive to put forward whatever constitutes your personal best effort, and don't dwell on how others may evaluate that effort. Noone understands your medical issues and physical limitations better than you, and so noone can dictate what may or may not work. Work within your parameters and take pride in a unique and very personal accomplishment.
*hugs* Please let me know if I can help at all.
P.S. If it turns out you're into a massive wardrobe overhaul that has to be accomplished on a tight budget, focus on a few basics that fit perfectly, then introduce inexpensive accessories like scarves, bags and jewelry to make a look your own.
