Totally OT

Louise

What would you do? An old boyfriend has contacted me on Facebook wanting to know what went wrong (we've been split up over 10 years!!) I have no desire to keep in touch with him i have already ignored a message and 2 friend requests from him!

16 years ago

General

21 replies

Latest reply was from Louise

Kristine

Veteran

Blech! Keep ignoring him! If you have something constructive to say, you could tell him very briefly what went wrong and then firmly tell him you don't want to keep in touch. But I'm sure that would open the door. Probably best to keep ignoring him. Hopefully he doesn't know how to find you in real life?

16 years ago

greenglove

(website)

Veteran

Ignore indefinitely!

16 years ago

Maya

Veteran

If you write back you're just going to open a door that you probably want to remain closed. Ignore him, and ban him if he keeps bugging you. I'm very coldhearted about these things, but I can't honestly be bothered with people like that who just don't let go. In the end I don't feel bad about it because it's probably the best thing for them too.

I deleted my FB account and haven't been missing it as much as I thought I would. It causes too much silly drama and frustration in my life!

16 years ago

taylor

Veteran

ugh...why do people do this...ignore, he will eventually get it...hopefully

16 years ago

Louise

Veteran

Maya i'm beginning to find facebook a nuisance too i might be following you soon x

16 years ago

Mamapicklejuice

Veteran

Louise, it's annoying to see "x friend requests pending" - but if you don't "ignore" them (i.e. respond in the negative via FB) they are unable to make a second request.

I would probably just ban them, as Maya suggested though...that ought to be a clear enough signal.

16 years ago

cciele

Veteran

Yes, ban him!

16 years ago

Maya

Veteran

I would recommend it. All FB did was keep me in touch with lots of people I barely knew or don't care much about. Anyone who I DO care about or want to keep in touch with, I can pick up the phone and call or see in person anyway (or log onto YLF and talk to!). It was kind of cool and nice when someone I lost touch with would add me, or vice versa, but after that we rarely spoke anyway.

The new privacy upgrade was the last straw. I can't use a site that does not give me total control over my information, or that pimps me out to marketing companies.

16 years ago

chewyspaghetti

Veteran

I agree- don't reply.
I don't do Facebook, either- it seems like such a pain.
I have someone that keeps sending me invites to different things, etc, and I just put him in my spam folder.

16 years ago

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Urrrgh, Facebook :0(

I'm with the gals. Ignore.

16 years ago

MNsara

Veteran

Definitely ignore. Any communication or acknowledgement at all would probably backfire (i.e. fuel his fire)

16 years ago

Vani

Veteran

Ignore, ignore, ignore!

16 years ago

Louise

Veteran

Well i ignored him and woke to 3 messages this morning asking why i was ignoring him!!!! I politely replied that the past was in the past and i had no wish to keep in touch got several respones back so i just kept copying and pasting the same message and he seems to have got the hint !!! x

16 years ago

Veteran

Good for you and hopefully good riddance of him!!

16 years ago

Dawn

(website)

Active Member

If he comes back again, ignore and block! I have very little time for people like that! While I don't have too many ex-boyfriends (started dating Alan when I was 18), I have had a couple of ex-friends do the same thing. Not a pleasant situation...

16 years ago

Ele

(website)

Active Member

Aw, is it wrong that I feel kind of bad for him? Not that I don't think you did the right thing, Louise (some people just don't get the message!), but I feel like someone has to stand in creepy ex's corner. It might as well be me.

16 years ago

Michelle

(website)

Veteran

Ele, I share your empathy... up to a point. I'm one of those people who dwells on the past and have a relationship that I've never ceased to think about or want to discuss with the guy in question... that said, I'd never, ever do what this dude is trying to pull! That's excessive and borderline harassment. You can be emotional without being imposing or just plain freaky! Banning is definitely the next step; this guy needs to get the message.

16 years ago

agrace

Active Member

This is why I don't like facebook! That's not fun, so sorry!

16 years ago

shana

Veteran

Louise, good riddance! Hopefully, he doesn't bother you again!

16 years ago

Jean Gray

Active Member

You did the right thing.

16 years ago

Louise

Veteran

Ele and michelle i totally understaand your empathy, i really am a big softy my current BF said i should just send a really nasty message to get rid of him but i'm too nice so went the polite route. I didn't want to keep in touch he was a pain to get rid of the first time round i had to ring my mobile company to turn off my voicemail cause he kept filling it with messages! He went major creepy!! x

16 years ago

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