Times, they are a-changing. - YouLookFab Forum

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Times, they are a-changing.

Mainelady

Veteran

This has been a fun summer, with some nice pockets of quiet relaxation, balanced with busy, boisterous family time and frequent “adventures in grand parenting”. Most of it has revolved around our home, with a few events at my sister’s place. I have loved all of it. It has been the best staycation ever.
I think I am in the midst of a style change. I love clothing and accessories and have ample of both. This summer I have found myself wearing lots of repeats, mixed and matched. The rotation capsule is small: 4 pairs of shorts, 6 tops and 3 pr of footwear. Of course there have been a few other items chosen, but nothing like my usual summer style patterns. I have worn dresses only 3 times. This is definitely a change. I don’t know if this is just a summer style change or if it will continue on when I return to work at the end of August.
I’ve been reflecting on the changes. Emotionally, I am the most peaceful, content and relaxed I have ever been. Is my more casual summer style related to this? Is my go to shorts and tops style because most of my summer events have been with family and home based? Quite likely. Would I have worn dresses if I had been out and about to more events? Probably. Is this good or bad? I really don’t know. I do find it interesting and a bit surprising.
My shorts and tops are never sloppy. They are casual, comfortable and have that little element of polish that makes me happy. For accessories, I am shocked that on most days, earrings, my wedding band, one other ring and just one bangle (yes, you read that right) seem perfect for the day. These are big changes for me and I can’t quite identify how or why I seem to be in a style shift. Once maximal, I have been in the minimal camp for the past month. Maybe it is just seasonal. Maybe not.
Being aware of how much of my summer clothing has just taken up space, I have chosen not to do any “back to school” shopping this year. Again, a big change in pattern for me. I really want to see how much of my work wear I actually do wear. I have never tracked wears before. Maybe I should do that.
I wonder if I will retain my style, but with a much smaller wardrobe? Have any of you done that? Gone from a pretty substantial wardrobe down to a small capsule?
I am trying not to over think this, so tossing it out to you.
I welcome any thoughts, or impressions you wish to share.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.
Wishing you all a beautiful day!

General

25 replies

Latest reply was from

bj1111

Veteran

Interesting how clothing choices reflect deeper changes.

Are you contemplating a transition? Personally, professionally?

If this minimalism continues, predicting your arm candy will get lonely and fight over who gets to spend the day with your fab self

nemosmom

Veteran

Fascinating! Lots of fabbers feeling a style shift in the forum lately, myself included - I wonder if it's seasonal?? Since starting Sal's "wear everything" challenge for July, I have started to divide up my wardrobe into mini-capsules based on activities and - it's funny - having fewer pieces to choose from within those capsules actually makes me feel more relaxed about it all - AND more pulled together. I have also been discovering a lot of pieces that no longer suit me for a handful of reasons, and happily purging. I am trying to track wears in Stylebook, to see what I am wearing and track cost per wear, but I don't always remember to log it.

It sounds like you are having an amazing staycation and enjoying the heck out of your family!

Carla

Veteran

My wardrobe started to shrink the year before I retired when I made a conscious decision to NOT buy work clothes. It became a very tight, small, capsule after an edit done just after leaving the work force, and a big purge this past fall. It is now a highly functional curated collection of clothes I wear and love - though it is at it's smallest that I can remember.

My lifestyle requires less outfit diversity than it did when I was in the workforce, so take that into consideration.

Barbara Diane

Veteran

I used to feel naked without jewelry but not so much anymore. I went through a skirt phase but not as much at the moment. When I lost weight but wasn’t ready to buy a complete new wardrobe I enjoyed wearing and wearing and remixing my small wardrobe. But laundry was more frequent.

Mainelady

Veteran

Thank you. You Fabbers are always thoughtful and helpful with your comments.

BJ1111, oh my gosh. Yes. You have posed excellent questions. Deeper changes, for sure. Without going into sad detail, I have made some major relationship changes with both my MIL and my own mother. It has been a challenging road and required a lot of work, time and energy to get to where I am. I feel freer and more peaceful than I ever have. Letting go is a not a strength of mine, but you know what? It is incredibly freeing.
More personal transitions as DH and I have found our forever camp and are selling our place in the mountains. Two real estate contracts that will close within a week of each other. Out with the outgrown and in with the new location for family memory making.
My arm candy won’t get lonely. I am pretty sure I will be stacking it back on when I go to work. At least that is what I predict.

Nemosmom, interesting. I think you are right. I still have all the choices, but somehow going back to the same ones doesn’t feel limited, it feels exactly as you said- more relaxed and pulled together. Family time has been the best, with the inclusion of DD’s significant other and his 3 children. They have been living as a family unit since April and fit in so naturally with our entire family. It feels like they have been in our family for years.

Runcarla! I am seriously considering retiring at the end of this coming school year. If not then, then the following June. Maybe part of my changes have been subconscious, but related to looking towards the end of my career. Once I retire, like you, I will not need nearly as much diversity in attire. Thank you for your words of wisdom.

Barbara Diane, it is somehow comforting to know I am not alone. Ha! I’m not sure why that is. It’s not like my changes are negative or scary. Perhaps it just feels comforting to know I am understood. Thank you. Oh, and I don’t mind doing laundry.

Anonymous

I go through periods of minimalism and then bounce back as I rediscover pieces I have not worn for awhile . For example, I could hardly wait for my theme week of wearing all my summer bottoms to end because I needed a change from all the color and then from white. Now I am still wearing summer bottoms but trying to mix it up more. Could you put all but the capsule you are currently wearing in a holding zone? In the past one Fabber did something like this and called it”the boutique” where she could “shop” if she needed a refresher. In the end she culled several things. Maybe someone else remembers more about this exercise.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

How lovely to settle into an easier style and pace for summer! I find a more minimal approach very appealing when the weather warms.

It sounds like you’re going through lots of changes, so perhaps a slight shift is happening. I say relax and enjoy it!

Mainelady

Veteran

Janet, thank you. I do relax into my summers quite well, but this summer I have become more relaxed than ever. Your comment and the comments of others are so helpful. Maybe my style shift is related to letting go of some heavier emotional stuff and letting go is spilling over into other areas of my life. Thought provoking.

Joy, this is helpful. I may bounce back to a more maximal me. I really don’t know, because I think I have held pretty consistent patterns and practices throughout the years. I like the idea of keeping things in a “boutique”. I will do some editIng, but not a dramatic purge at the end of the summer. Next summer I may want more options and I have the space for a holding zone.

Anonymous

I can certainly understand that your frocks have not had much wear. They are less likely to be worn when having adventures with grandchildren. Right now for me that means sitting on rocks looking for rolly-pollies and snails to capture for a bug zoo...I know, these are not bugs, but try explaining that to a preschooler. This week we spent hours at some ponds in the area hiking in reeds and on boardwalks over wetlands. A dress...just NO.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

It’s kind of funny, because I’m getting huge wear out of my dresses this summer and mainly wearing my shorts just around the house. Although yesterday I did wear my grey Bermudas and a white shirt.

LaPed

Veteran

I've had a shorts-heavy summer too, swapping out a skirt for the shorts when I want to feel a little "fancier". I thought I would want more shoe options this summer, but have been finding I'm content with what I have. It helps that sporty sandals are trending!

kkards

Veteran

personally i think its the heat....and the rain....at least where i live this summer has had WAY to much rain and the hot has been unbearable....for me both of these extremes have me reaching for the tried and true...
and i think Runcarla and bj1111 are on to something...you're starting to move on to the next part of your adventure and your style is starting to evolve with that....

bj1111

Veteran

challenging emotional work when tackled seems to bring the most peace.

cheering you onto your next phase.

Anonymous

Raises hand! I did. I started with a massive, uncoordinated wardrobe. Over multiple years on YLF, I whittled that wardrobe down considerably. I never want to go back to the unmanageable wardrobe I once owned.

Cardiff girl

Veteran

I'm so glad that you are having such a wonderful summer and that your mental state of relaxation has translated into your clothing is fascinating.l think that you are right not to overthink it,just enjoy where you are now and carry on going with the flow.Many people never achieve this let alone recognise it for the gift that it is so you are wise to have done both.

Mainelady

Veteran

Joy, your adventures sound like such fun! What are rocky-polys? I know what snails are and I think they would be a great addition to a big zoo ;).
LaPed, sporty sandals are getting lots of wear during my grandparenting adventures. I can cover multiple types of terrain and splash through puddles quite quickly.
Kkards, you may be right. A combo of the weather and the pages of life opening to new chapters. That makes sense.
Thank you very much BJ1111.
Sterling, I am going to high five you raised hand. I am not quite sure how my style will evolve, but I never want to go back to repeat the emotional work I have done to get to where I am. It was rugged, but worth the journey.
Oh Cardiff Girl, you are so kind. The past propelled me forward and I have been a very slow work in progress, but I am in a healthy and a happy place and yes, I do recognize that as a gift. These days, my smile is not just on my face. I feel it in my heart.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

This is what I have always done. I have hooks (usually on the back of my bedroom door) or sometimes I use a chair or even the footboard if it’s high enough. Where ever it is, i always have a place where I keep my “current” clothing, generally less than 10 pieces, that i wear for a few weeks, maybe 6 weeks. Then I shift, sometimes completely, sometimes just a few items. It’s crucial for me to remember to go back and put those pieces I’m not wearing into the hamper, or the spot gets full and useless. When I posted about this in the past, many commenters said they also had a “collection” spot, and they felt guilty about it. I don’t think it’s a bad thing at all—otherwise I’d wash every item every time I wore it (wasteful, time consuming, and wears clothes out faster) or I’d put things I’d worn back into the closet expecting to wear them again, then not wear them, and they’d stay there for 11 months until I got around to them again (ewwwww). So I’m happy having a space for the current mini-capsule.

Anonymous

You know, I was getting there last summer, and throughout the winter had my closet edited down to something I felt I had a handle on. I worked a capsule concept for much of the time, and it really helped me use the clothes I had. I fell off the wagon this spring - a few major life changes (not necessarily negative ones but impactful all the same) flipped me into my old bad shopping habits and I've accumulated far too many clothes again. It's interesting to read how your feelings of being settled yet at the cusp of some changes have affected how you are viewing your closet.

Jane

Veteran

I admire you for having owned the changes that you think might be happening. I think it makes it easier for moving onto new stages.

I also think that sometimes with wardrobes you can say 'been there, done that' and at least you have known you have given it a whirl. Well done with finding a 'forever home'!

I wish you well and look forward to seeing the next stage!

Katerina

Veteran

This is so interesting, Mainelady. Thank you for sharing this. I think our wardrobe, how we dress during different periods in life and during a season is certainly connected to our state of mind, where we are emotionally and the things going on in our lives. Like you, I have a rather large wardrobe and a very large collection of accessories. During the years, I tried to downsize a few times. It was a conscious desicion - inspired by people with smaller effective capsule wardrobes and driven by practical needs - not enough storage etc. Each time it felt good at the time but what I then did was to shop more and expand my wardrobe to a larger size again. Now I know it is not the way for me. Where I am in my life right now - my state of mind - I want to have a larger wardrobe and a very large accessory wardrobe. I got more storage. I have edited a lot and carefully so I only have clothes I like a lot and that fit. But I still have a lot. I still love to shop my closet and playing with accessories and colors is still fun. When that changes, I will change the wardrobe. But with that said, I also have periods when I partly “take a break” from fashion. That happens usually when I have too much to do and too much on my plate and not the capacity to be creative with outfits. Than I go back to workhorses and my “uniforms”. Thankfully, though, I always come back at some point to my interest in and joy of fashion again - for which I am grateful. I am absolutely not saying that people with small wardrobes don’t love fashion and style. I am sure they do - which is obvious as so many people here on YLF enjoy small very effective wardrobes. What I am trying to say is that we are all different and I am not the small capsule person. Not yet, anyway. Listen to your feelings and take your time. You will see if this is a phase or a more permanent shift.

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

You sound like you are reaching a good place of peace within and are shedding emotional and actual baggage in the process. Best of all you sound open to where your feelings lead you, which sounds like a wonderful place.
As an aside, I understand just what you mean about how families can also be open to new members and embrace them. A sign of a strong and loving family I think.

Mainelady

Veteran

Fashintern, thank you for sharing your strategy with me. It sounds like a good one. I do have a section of one closet where I place items that will get another wear before going in the wash, so visually it makes it very easy to repeat within a short period of time.
Lisa P, thank you for sharing your experience. What you wrote sounds quite similar to how I am feeling. It is interesting how feeling more settled while on the brink of some changes may be impacting my clothing choices. Maybe I am just more comfortable in my own skin, or maybe I am really ready for the next chapters in my life. Now that is super interesting, because my past self would have proceeded through changes (even good ones) with more caution. I feel like I am ready to embrace these upcoming changes.
Thank you Jane. Owning who I am and why I am who I am is a practice. My self reflection of late has had a lot more focus than my mirror image. Hmmmm, maybe the energy it takes to move on to a new phase has more of a draw than clothing right now.
Katerina, I think you are right. Whatever my process is, I am going to trust it. Time will tell if this is a phase, a stepping stone to a new style, or a permanent shift. I suspect no matter how small or large the wardrobe, I will always have a large stash of great accessories. It is funny how just one happiness factor bangle is all I have needed during most summer days.
Shevia, awwww. Your last comment warms my heart. It is true. My immediate family is a very strong and loving unit. As parents, it is such a gift to see your children in warm and loving family relationships of their own.

rachylou

Veteran

I have to admit I am slow to catch on when my life changes. There’s a certain lag time there. But lots of shifting has happened in my life since being on YLF. I came to YLF with a wardrobe twice the size of what I have now, not that it’s not still massive anyways. And this year my shopping has slowed to what for me is a standstill.

Sorta interesting. I moved away from going to an office every day. I think working in an office made/makes me change things up more. Practicality can lounge in the backseat. And old tee shirts don’t pass as a fashion statement either.

Also, I moved back to town from the suburbs. I donated my car and haven’t gotten a new one; it’s really unnecessary in town - and it has to be said my town is very anti-car. There’s counter-intuitively not much to buy here; lots more shopping in the suburbs; but then that is dying too as everything moves online and I don’t like online shopping. So reasons why I’ve slowed down on the shopping.

But it remains to be seen how long things will be like this. I’ve added an office day back, so I’m mixing it up a little more recently. I have intentions to get myself to an Anthropologie to try on those plaid high waist Paige jeans...

Mainelady

Veteran

Rachylou, you have had some changes and I do think they have influenced your shopping and also your interest/ opportunity to mix things up. It will be interesting to see if this is a short term or long term phase for you. Good luck with the plaid Anthro jeans!

Anonymous

Mainelady, rolly pollies are those insect-like critters that often live under rocks in the garden. They roll up into a ball when disturbed. They do not bite or sting so safe for preschoolers to pick up and put in a bowl to observe (the snails can climb out). Ants are also fun, especially if you can dig up the major part of a colony and put it into a clear glass jar with black tag board around it so that the ant tunnels can be seen when the tag board is removed.
We insist that the “bugs” be released back into the wild so they can return to their friends..