Time vs money in fashion and beauty (and other things I suppose)

Ladies (and dudes? people of all and no genders...), perhaps you can help me resolve a personal conflict.

Example one, the consignment store: I like the idea of consignment and getting a few bucks back from things that no longer work for me. There's one in a nearby town, but every time I've gone to browse I've felt patronized. It could be that the ladies who work there are genuinely that enthusiastic, but it feels fake and nice-nicey. When I came in with a test run of things to consign, the lady I talked to refused to look at my stuff because it was not on hangers (to be fair that is on the policies on their website, I just missed it) and gave some 'tips' about having things clean and ironed that made me feel like she was an autocratic schoolmarm and I was a little kid being taken to task. Even assuming I overreacted because I'm an introverted misanthrope, I haven't convinced myself to go back and try again. So for now I've got two bags of stuff just sitting in my garage because I can't convince myself to donate them (I donate plenty else but these are 'nicer' brands.)

Example two, cosmetics: there's a site, makeupalley.com (great for reviews btw) which has a swap section. You can list your not-for-me makeup, toiletries, etc., and swap for something else you've been wanting to try from someone else. I've successfully done this several times, but now I find myself resenting the idea of having to list items, respond to people's emails, negotiate, etc., and deal with the post office. But the idea of the alternative, just throwing things away, bugs the crap out of me too.

I suppose one part of me is looking for permission to say 'oh screw it, just donate/throw away' but more generally I'm looking for an approach to these things. I have more time than money so I feel like I should save resources in these sorts of ways but clearly I don't want to, or more accurately I don't want to deal with the downside of having to do so.

13 years ago

anne

Veteran

I can relate!
Someone on my budget should probably thrift more, but I just hate the time involved. And I have never bothered to sell anything either, though my stuff isn't really good enough to sell anyway.

I tend to say "go ahead, donate it" !

Gaylene

Why not get a bit more creative about where to find a new home for your things.

My DH and recently contacted a local immigration centre and asked the director if anyone could make use of a list of items we had drawn up-- most of which were almost new or high-end items like sporting goods, tools, home appliances, furniture, expensive clothing,etc. We also offered the use of our truck as long as the person would be willing to do the lifting and loading. Eight families took us up on the offer. Within a day, all of our things had a new home. And my husband and I have been on the receiving end of dozens of invitations ranging from coffee and cake to family celebrations to festivals.

It made me see my unwanted items in a whole new light-- to me they represented clutter but to someone else that unused bike represented independent transportation around town. It also made me aware of all kinds of organizations that can use gently used, high quality items. Maybe a woman's shelter might use some of the unused makeup or face creams. Maybe those unwanted tools can provide a source of extra income to a handyman.

It took a bit of convincing to get the director on board at first. Most of these organizations do not have the facilities to handle junk-- and, unfortunately, that's sometimes what people have attempted to foist on these organizations. But once they realize that what you are talking about is a 42" LCD TV that is only 2 years old, they are much more likely to want to cooperate because they see the benefit to their clients.

And both my husband and I have received so much in return.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

That's a great point, Gaylene. Unfortunately, the shelters and food banks in our area won't take opened cosmetics (understandably) so I'm not sure what else to do with them but pitch them. I try to do my research before I buy something but I still end up with a few things that just don't work for me. In the past I'd guilt myself into using them up or let them sit in the medicine cabinet for a year before I felt OK throwing them away.

I guess my thought, now that I'm feeling less word vomit-y than my first post (sorry all), is that sometimes I resent feeling like I need to maximize my possible savings all the time. More proof that 'stuff' has a cost of time as well as money.

As for the cosmetics, I have recently decided to spend a little more and buy things at CVS, where you can return anything, opened or used or whatever. I figure an extra $2 for a lipstick is fine because if it doesn't work out (it didn't) I can return it instead of saving that $2 on a lipstick I will never wear.
The clothes I have resigned to a certain amount of loss.

Fruitful

I totally relate to the sense that stuff costs time, money and so much more. I am trying hard to limit what I bring into the house (financial constraints make that easier, but I still have to be careful of "bargains" that are more trouble than they're worth). I love Flylady's acronym: STUFF = Something That Undermines Family Fun. Very true for me! I've learnt (and continue to learn) the hard way that less really is more.

As an aside, someone on MUA might enjoy a RAOK if you feel up to it.

Queen Mum

Not only is time money, but hanging on to stuff and fretting about what to do with it is also using up your own mental energy that could be spent elsewhere. I know it's not always a popular view, but honestly, tossing something into the trash that I no longer want or need gets it out of my house and out of my mind and frees me to never have to think about it again.
I do donate many things... I do. But sometimes it's so much simpler to just toss it.

Example...I'm painting the boys' bathroom. In preparation, I took down a wall hanging that I have been tired of looking at for years. I set it on the kitchen floor thinking I should consider spray painting and reusing. But that means I have to store it until I figure out what to do with it. (I don't have a ton of storage space). I finally decided that I more than got my money's worth out of the silly thing and picked it up to put out in the trash. On the way to the trash, I started feeling guilty that I wasn't donating it. But have you seen the home decor aisle at Goodwill? I decided that the earth would continue to spin on it's axis and nobody was going to be negatively affected by this silly wall hanging being tossed in the trash. I tossed, returned to what I was doing and didn't have to think about it again. Sometimes it's okay to be irresponsible. Let it go and move on.

Anonymous

If any of your department stores has an Origins counter, they recycle used cosmetics containers. I dump mine there -- at least I don't feel guilty about the packaging!

I've also just left toiletries and cosmetics in my gym's bathroom with a "free - please take" sign.

As far as clothes, I know eBay is a hassle, but I've had good luck with it. Even if you just make a deal with yourself to list an item a day, or an item a week, the money does start to add up in a pleasing way!

Kristin L

I swap things at rehashclothes.com and absolutely love it. While you do have to take time to list and negotiate, I feel like I've gotten some awesome stuff just by trading things I wasn't using anymore. I have had a few problem,s but almost everyone is always willing to try to fix things. And if you have a printer and postal scales at your house, you can just ship from home.

rachylou

I would love to try eBay, but it's too much for my small brain. Calculating postage, taking photos...

re. consignment shops: They can be that way. I know one where the buyers sit and shred customers in their little buying cubicle... totally forgetting that it is actually open and everybody can hear them. Real hens.

MsMary

I figure if the consignment store is going to pay me only 30% of what they sell my stuff for, I might as well donate it, write it off on my taxes at the consignment store value, and come out even!

Can't help you with the cosmetics. How about tossing the ones currently on hand, and on a going-forward basis buying from someplace where you can return open products?

Janet

For giving stuff away that is not exactly consignment or donation friendly, is there a Freecycle group in your area? I have given away an absolutely amazing amount of things I thought no one would want through Freecycle.

I don't have time to either thrift shop or consign, so I donate. Besides, I wear a small petite size that's difficult to find at a thrift store and difficult to sell.

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