threw in the style towel yesterday - YouLookFab Forum

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threw in the style towel yesterday

Alecia

Veteran

Just venting but yesterday I threw up my hands in frustration when it was time to get dressed. The couple suits I have that fit well and can be worn in this weather were at the cleaners so I was resigned to wear one that was so so (per ylf reviews). Then I had a frustrating time finding a top long enough for the pants and by the time I got to the shoes, I had given up all hope on looking good anyway. I just threw some on that worked for color but the heels were too high and I definitely didn't have ppl. I spent the rest of the day feeling blah and out of sorts. (Sorry, I didn't have time for a picture.)

I have been at this effort to get my closet in order for a while now but it seems that especially with my work clothes that it's really slow going. When you're dealing with wardrobe basics like a suit, they really needs to fit right. No amount of new accessories will make it better if they don't. So when you start out with a ho-hum suit selection and have a limited budget, it can take quite a bit of time to get it worked out. And now I know better about fit and style so I can't remain blissfully ignorant when I have to pull out those suits that don't really work. It impacts my mood and makes me frustrated.

I know some of you must have been in this place before. I appreciate knowing that I'm not alone in that. Thanks for letting me vent.

General

16 replies

Latest reply was from Caro93

anne

Veteran

Vent away - I know I have. I am still in that place at times. I try to think that even if I know I am not making it according to YLF that most of the people I see won't realise!

tarzy

Veteran

Alecia - I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. Please try to give yourself a break. It's a process, and you're at the part where you're starting to actually know what you want, which is great! It's frustrating not being able to magically replace all those things that don't work, but eventually you will.

I've also been battling the style blues over the past few weeks, so I completely sympathize.

Patience

Veteran

I am also sorry you are feeling this way. Please please please don't be so hard on yourself. Everyone here is rooting for you and this forum is all about feeling good. You *will* get there. I have been there too.

Caro93

Totally understand the venting. I have a huge, wonderful wardrobe -- but for the size I was a year ago. I have been forced to purchase new clothing for my current size, but have not been able to completely match/replace all the items. Fortunately, I have a closet in my basement that I keep everything I can't currently wear and only keep wearable clothing in my bedroom closet upstairs. This has helped me to keep a handle on what I can actually wear and whether or not things are clean, etc.

It might help you to sort your clothing by what you like and want to wear, have and could wear, don't like and won't wear. Then get rid of the don't like, won't wear. You might be surprised by what is left. And remember, you can make the items in your like and want to wear clothes go further by mixing things up a bit. I have lots of suits, but found I can use the individual pieces with other items to enlarge my options. GOOD LUCK and hang in there!

bella

(website)

Veteran

Hey Alecia, I hear you! I know I feel upset when I don't feel beautiful in my outfits but sometimes we all have to make it do with what we have.
My one suggestion is this: Do you absolutely have to wear suits to work? I know I have seen you in other very well-put together outfits, which weren't suits. Perhaps you can post a couple of those pictures on your wardrobe door and make sure on the weekend that at least one set of those outfits are clean and ready to be worn. This way, you can make sure to always have something to fall back on when suits don't work?

Maya

Veteran

I'm sorry Alecia I definitely sympathize with what you're saying. If even one thing is off about my outfit, it nags at me all day and is definitely a mood-spoiler. Give yourself a break though. Suits are expensive, and getting them to fit perfectly is a labor-intensive process, and can often mean tailoring, thus driving up the cost. I think anyone who has ever done a wardrobe overhaul knows how you feel. Changing things up is not a quick and easy process, especially on a budget. I don't have any suggestions but I can commiserate!

Kari

Veteran

Alecia, I hear you. I've been reading YLF for a couple years and attempting to adapt Angie's concepts, but really couldn't afford to overhaul my entire wardrobe at the same time. I've had to replace it one piece at a time depending on my budget, and this was relatively cheap clothes, not investment pieces like suits.

PPL was one of the trickiest things to overhaul because I have to designate certain pants as flats-only or heels-only or low heels/wedges-only, and then some of my pants length changes when I gain or lose weight. It drives me up the wall, and some days I confess I throw in the towel too just for the sake of having something in my body so I can get out the door.

I like Bella's suggestion of having a ready-to-go backup outfit, and for me, photo-blogging my daily outfits for the past month has made me much more conscious of fit/color concepts. It also really helps me remember what pieces go together, so if I'm in a pinch I find myself going back to photos I've taken and using an outfit that already works. I'm not sure if that idea would work for you, though.

taylor

Veteran

I also have a couple of " flop proof" outfits for those days. One is a black dress that I can wear anywear with any color or style shoe, and the other is a denim outfit (skinny jeans w/ a longer top))that I can dress up or down. They are the 2 outfits that I feel best in...so if I am having an ughhhh day, as we all do...at least I can throw one of these two on and at least feel good about that....

shiny

Veteran

(((((Alecia)))))

I've been in that position most of my life!!!! I knew that the fit or style was off, but I couldn't articulate WHY. So I kept trying and dumping money on clothes and having those awkward days, just as you described. Take heart in the fact you know that it is a PPL issue or an ill-fit suit issue or whatever. That is great. It really is. That gives you something to solve. It is far worse knowing you don't look like you want to look, but having no idea why or how to fix it, and just repeating the same exact mistakes over and over and over again....

(yeah for YLF!)

Now, I don't know if this will make you feel better or worse BUT... once you have that perfect YLF closet with lots of perfect options.... you may find you are experimenting and taking risks with all your fab clothes, and having days when you feel like you are a screaming "fashion victim" billboard!!! LOL.

P.s. Today I had to go to the office and in my rush to get out the door, and thinking it was going to be "warm" (in quotes because that's relative here in Boston), I didn't think to put a cami under my silky blouse. And all day long it annoyed the heck out of me, because of major static cling issues (unattractively calling attention to my love handles and bhudda belly), and also it was chilly without a cami.

Alecia

Veteran

I knew you all would bolster my spirits and my resolve. Thank you all your help and support!

I think you're right that the feeling is a symptom of progress in my honing my eye. So that is a good thing. (And a direct result of ylf, so I second shiny's "yeah for YLF!") It'll be good when my wardrobe catches up.

I also like the idea of having a couple fool proof outfits at the ready. I do have a couple of those but get thwarted when they all have to go to the cleaners at once. Hate that! And I'm too disorganized and klutzy to avoid that from time to time. And, yes, there are days I need to wear suits. I often have to testify in front of legislative committees. It's kind of suit territory. I continue to work toward building my suit options so that I have more fool proof options in that realm, too.

shell

ive definitely had days like this before too! after a few closet clean-outs, i've been able to discard most of the items that weren't perfect. however, i have had to hold onto a few items i didn't LOVE because i don't have the funds to replace them yet. but, slowly but surely, i'll build a decent wardrobe, and hopefully you're working your way up to that too!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

My dear Alecia, I'm glad you vented. That’s good for the soul. Sorry that you’re feeling blue, but you really ARE getting there. You’re doing so well! As everyone has mentioned, it’s a process. And you’re embracing the process the best that you can. That’s excellent and well done.

Suits are unfortunately expensive, and in time you’ll replace the ones that don’t make you feel fabulous. Catching them on extra special markdown is a real bonus and retailers are giving merchandise away for a song at the moment. It might be worth stalking suits till the cows come home with the budget that you do have available. You know we are here to help :0)

hanna

(website)

alecia, i understand completely how you feel! there are days when i plan ahead what i will wear the night before, only to wake up, put it on, and realize it's all wrong - fit, proportion, SOMETHING. and that is directly a product of having gotten such wonderful advice from YLF - our eyes are much more discerning now and much, much pickier about how things look and fit.

as angie says, it is a process, and we are all learning - that is the best part! we will all be here to support you on days like these. glad you got to vent!

Laura

(website)

Veteran

Alecia, I can empathize! I too have had "off" days - usually they start when I wake up too late, walk into my closet cluelessly, then hear my 3-year-old calling my name from his bed, and i wind up grabbing whatever garment I see first. The result: I am annoyed at myself for looking sub-par, given how much time and effort I've invested in trying to build a wardrobe!!

Hang in there. We'll help you stalk suits if you decide to go that way!

Inge

(website)

I'm sorry you had such a rough 'fashion day' Alecia.
I think we all know how hard it is, because although we know what doesn't work anymore, we can't just go out and replace our entire wardrobe all at once, and we have to live with less than perfect items for a little while longer.

Let me just say that you have been looking marvellous lately. Please hang in there!

And Laura is right: do let us know if we can help you look for suits.

P.S. A little late but: congratulations with winning your powerlifting competition!!

Caro93

Alecia, (and all you other ylf's) there are a lot of retailers doing anything and everything to get your money! Keep an eye out for special additional % off sales on already reduced merchandise. I know that department stores like Macy's and Dillard's run sales, usually at the end of the month, where they offer an additional 30-40% off permanently reduced items. In most cases that ends up being 70-80% off the regular price, so maybe that will help you to replace and add items to your wardrobe faster?! Good luck!