The great Spring 2013 jacket search (long with decision at end) - YouLookFab Forum

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The great Spring 2013 jacket search (long with decision at end)

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

My sweet patient Fabbers - I have inundated you lately with threads about spring jackets (leather and moto style) and frankly, I'm sick of myself by now - I can't imagine how y'all feel!!!

These are the jackets I've tried and the links to the threads about them:

- Black/white leather race car style moto from Danier
- Floral moto from Club Monaco
http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....loral-moto

- Yellow leather moto from Danier
http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....her-jacket

- Blue leather jacket from Danier
http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....her-jacket

I've been doing a fair bit of thinking today about these jackets and what I'm looking for and what I've achieved (or not achieved as the case may be) and I've come up with something. Please bear with me while I figure this out...

I've gotten into my head that I need a spring leather jacket or moto of some sort. Why I came up with this, I don't know. I suspect it's because over the last month or so I've seen so many of you showing your new beautiful jackets and I became quite enamored of them.And let's not even get started on my love/hate relationship with Danier and their beautiful items and all that has been posted with their items lately.

Finding THE ONE has not been easy and downright frustrating at times. And I still don't think I've found it. I said in my thread regarding the blue leather jacket, that I'm an emotional shopper and sometimes I just try so darned hard to make something work even when it doesn't. I don't like to give up easily and I don't like to fail. And when you shop with your heart instead of your head, you feel more invested in the search, you know?

Una and I PM'd a bit about this last night and I also mentioned to her that I couldn't even remember why I was searching for this elusive Holy Grail of leather jackets anymore and that I think part of it is the need to have something new all the time, like it is somehow wrong to be satisfied with what you have and how we feel like we need to constantly be on the search for new.

So based on all of this thinking and my own realization of the time I've spent looking, buying, and returning said jackets, I'm going to return the blue one as well as I truly don't think it's a 10 and stop for a while. Una is right in that I am probably compromising somewhat since really, it was white leather that was on my original spring wish list, not colored. And Angie is right in that this color of blue can be tricky to work with and thinking of what I have in my wardrobe, may have limited wear.

Once again, I cannot thank all of you enough for helping me reach some clarity and come to this realization. It is always a learning process.

Now back to what I really do genuinely NEED and that's layering tanks and tees, a blouse or two, and just maybe a black flippy skirt.

Love you all

Shopping

36 replies

Latest reply was from cheryle (Dianthus)

catgirl

Veteran

Shannon, if you were here in person I'd be giving you a big hug. It is your decision to make, but that doesn't make it easy. When you return something for the right reasons, it's a success not a fail!

And in answer to your question from last night, I think we'd do really well shopping together. I seem good at keeping everyone on track but myself, and if you could do the same, we could force ourselves to stay PPP!

Susie

Veteran

We love you too, Shannon! I know I don't offer as much wisdom as others but I'm happy to help if I can. I enjoy reading your musings and I think it's great that you've come to this conclusion.

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

Great introspection.

Carla

Veteran

No worries!

I've been following all the leather moto jacket threads, because I don't even own a leather jacket. The dedicated shopping Fabbers are doing an awful lot of work for me, sorting through the styles and colours available, commenting on workmanship, fabrication, and fit issues. By the time I get into proximity of a Danier (end of May...does Ottawa have one?) I might just have things sorted...size 10 or 12?, medium/short neck, broad shoulders, long arms, colour?

It's like having a TEAM of stylists!

So, thanks to you TShannon and all the Fabbers on the great and perfect leather moto quest!

Ingunn

(website)

Veteran

You are a wise and honest person, that is who you are. I love reading your introspects, and they resonate strongly with me. I'm quite similar to you in my approach to both shopping and other tings in life - I sometimes try too hard to make it work. This decision is right, because you say so. Well done, Shannon.

Anonymous

I'm going to go against the grain here and say that I don't like moto jackets and I don't most people can pull them off. I think one of the downfalls of this board is that people tend to jump on a trend or a purchase someone else made just because it looked so great on them or to jump on the bandwagon or whatever.

IMO you're right to step back and forget about it for awhile. Your perfect jacket might show up when you least expect it to.

Anonymous

Shannon you are one smart cookie. It sounds like shopping with your heart is tough on the emotions. (I must be a thinking shopper instead of a feeling shopper). If you've realized that the blue color is not all that versatile, then I would put this in the disaster averted category instead of the failure category. Well, the blue jacket isn't a disaster in any way, but you get my drift! Plus now you have more money to re-spend, which is always fun. Onwards!

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

I do this too Shannon. I sometimes get rather obsessed with an item. I will shop for it relentlessly, maybe over a period of months. Then sometimes I get to that same point of "why in the world am I obsessing over this one thing?" Usually it IS a combination of reasons like I need a reason to shop in order to justify looking at pretty things. Or I feel like I "need" something new to brighten my mood. I must admit, sometimes it also works out well to obsess. But you already know that too. I shopped for months for the right moto style jacket after seeing so many great ones on YLF last year. For me the right one meant NOT leather (too hot here to enjoy it enough) and machine washable (very hard). I eventually did find one in a coated denim not long ago but it's not going to get used until this fall as it's already too warm here. It comes with a generous return policy so the tag is still on just in case I've been kidding myself and when fall comes I get my wits back. But for now, I'm satisfied.

I wondered about your "need" for a white leather jacket. I thought about the white denim jacket I thought I "needed" and bought last year and only have worn 3 times. The faded denim one I've never worn as I opted for the darker denim whenever the option came up. Still has it's tag on but I don't think I can return it. (but I will double check I think). And the denim blazer style jacket I found at a resale shop for $10 that I thought was such a great find (really more of a childhood memory desire - again, I've never worn and it's in the donate box.

I am getting better about not getting overly worked up on new trends or fashion envy items. Ingunn's fantastic black bomber made me look at bombers on several shopping excursions because it looked so great on her, but then I realized that black moto already fills the spot for me. I don't need a bomber at all.

It's like fashion therapy here - and that's a very good thing to me.

Sylvie

Veteran

Aha! It is so easy to decide we need an item after seeing everyone else get one. This point you made, is, I think, key:

"I've gotten into my head that I need a spring leather jacket or moto of some sort. Why I came up with this, I don't know."

If you had serendipitously stumbled upon the perfect spring leather jacket, then of course it is reasonable to keep it. But if don't know you have a wardrobe hole, it doesn't make sense to invest all that energy into searching, buying, returning.

I have to say I quite admire your tenacity because it takes me months to source and purchase anything. If you had time for it, I bet you'd be an awesome personal shopper.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Shannon, you are making a good decision here. Even though I love the blue jacket and think it could work very well for you, even more important is the learning and self-reflection you are doing here.

In many ways, I think YLF does this for each of us. Somehow, reading Angie's blog regularly and participating in the forum can help us address our personal shopping weaknesses. For some, it is the restless need for something new -- when the closet is already full of lovely things that go unworn. For others, it is too many clothes, so much chaos, not even days in the year to wear the things they have. Still others don't have enough clothes and are too timid in their shopping. Others refuse or are unable to spend money on themselves (even within their own budgets) and feel frivolous if they do. Some don't buy for their dominant season. Some buy for their fantasy life and have nothing to wear for their real life. And so on.

Every one of us has at least one of these weaknesses. and it's by hanging out here that we learn how to address them. You have learned so much! I like that you are able to see -- without judgement -- that you shop with your heart. Mostly, shopping with your heart is a good thing. And sometimes, it makes you buy things that on reflection aren't the best purchases. Just knowing this about yourself will make you pause this way before each major purchase -- thus ensuring that in future, your heart and your head will be in agreement.

And now, because I can't help it, did you try on this particular jacket? The back length is 21."

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Sona

Veteran

I am so glad you made this decision. I was sitting quietly on the sidelines but really thought none of the candidates were an 11 for you. My mom always told me getting a 100% on a test was not enough, you should impress the teacher enough that she wants to give you a 101 hence the 11/10 reference!

catgirl

Veteran

Sona, you know this joke, I hope:

What's an Asian F?
An A-.

Sylvie

Veteran

Una, an Asian F is an A. Nothing less than an A+ is acceptable.

Adding side note: When I was growing up, I didn't tell my parents when I had exams or papers due. Every now and then, they'd ask if I'd had any tests recently. I'd carefully sort through the accumulated papers and only show them the ones that were 97 percent or higher.

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

Una - it is indeed a success and not a failure and I feel ok about it. You were a HUGE help to me last night. Hugs back at ya friend!

RunCarla - good luck with your own jacket search

Sylvie - you call it tenacity; my husband calls it being a pain in the ***! - lol

Suz - how could I have forgotten that link and jacket??? The white one you've linked to is the white one I ordered and tried here (http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....et-edition).

Sona - please don't ever feel like you can't tell me the truth. I'm learning to be a big girl - lol!

Thank you all for your comments. Your input is always appreciated

hedgiehog

Veteran

Shannon, so glad you came full circle in this shopping quest and decided to return. Although I did like the jacket, I agree with the other ladies that unless something fills a gap and it is a 10+ item, it isn't worth your fabness. I can relate to the need for having something new...sometimes I find that I bought something that looked great on someone else only to find that it doesn't work for my style or my body. Spending time here on YLF, although short, has taught me that.
On another note, Una & sylvie...you cracked me up! My DD came home upset the other day and mentioned that she received the equivalent of an Asian F on her algebra test. When I asked her what that was she told me it was an A-. I laughed so hard when I saw the same phrase here. I had to keep telling her that her A- was perfectly ok!

Ariadne

Veteran

Shannon, I loved reading your insights. It sounds like you made a decision that is in tune with both your head and your heart. That's a huge accomplishment, in my opinion, and NOT an easy thing to do, sometimes. Thanks for sharing your process with us. It's truly fascinating and extremely helpful. I love these types of threads.

rae

(website)

Veteran

Shannon, I want to type more at home, but I SO empathize regarding the searching, not wanting to fail, and not wanting to give up on a goal. You sound like you have had a similar time to me in my trench search... I hope the right one finds you one of these days... When you need it and don't have to stress over it.

Deborah

Veteran

Shannon I really appreciate you sharing how you processes your decision here. And you know you are not not alone:). I posted a while packs re a pair of straight leg jacquard trousers for winter. I picked up said pants on Thursday (I had lay buyed them), got them home so excited, put them on last night to try and thought what was I thinking. I was so focussed on buying into the trend that I lost perspective. The pants didnt look completely awful but in reality were not 100% me. I'm returning them today! You should have seen DH's eye rolling lol. Sometimes I want something so badly that I find myself unwittingly compromising. Something I am trying really hard not to do. FWIW I think you made the right decision re returning and the insight you have gained (and shared) is invaluable.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

I hope the self-knowledge that you have obviously taken away from "the great leather jacket hunt" has made it all worthwhile.

Thanks so much for your honesty. For me, you are one of the people who make this such a great place:)

Mochi

Veteran

I don't even have any idea what fashion issues you all started out discussing, but prepare to laugh:

http://highexpectationsasianfather.tumblr.com/

Thistle

Veteran

I understand the love of the hunt. And, I understand seeing beautiful items on others and wanting to add them to your closet, even if it doesn't necessarily fit with your style goals or lifestyle.

I am impressed with your introspection and your ability to take a step back and reevaluate your nNed's.

Nicole D

Veteran

Mochi, too funny! And apparently not far off the mark.

Shannon, I love those jackets but I do think you can do without the blue one. My fave is the floral moto.
I really appreciate your reasoning, I think it is easy to get caught up in the hunt for something and that is fun...until it's not. So just know your limit and shop within it!

Aida

Veteran

*hugs* Good introspection Shannon, and way to be tough but correct with your decisions for yourself. Whenever I purchase something YLF influenced, I am even more than normal NOT on Team Wear specifically so that I give myself time to reflect on whether the item really does deserve a place in my wardrobe. Especially when on a budget, it really is worth thinking on each item we get.

I'll join you and Una shopping, I'm a ruthless shopper! Just as Mary how many open weave sweaters I shot down for her before we finally found the right one

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

Mochi - too funny!

Well I'm glad you all don't mind my introspective and musing posts. Sometimes putting things down in words is the only way I can get the thoughts straight in my head, you know?

pil

Veteran

Good for you Shannon, I'm glad you're content with your final decision. It's so hard to exercise cold impartiality.

Raisin

Veteran

Such a good point Shannon, and applicable to so many aspects of life. Thanks for the insightful post!

Nadya

Veteran

I love your musings! They help me sort out my own wardrobe puzzles, like whether I need nude flats, or a clutch .....thanks for sharing!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Ah, okay -- I got confused....I thought that last one was the one with the more V shaped neckline. But that one is definitely longer than this one. And this one is too long.

If it will make you feel any better, when I tried on the one that has the sort of snakeskin trim, I looked kind of the same. It just kind of...hung there.

Ah well. I am firmly convinced that if we wait long enough they will cut another jacket in the same way as our Blink jacket and make it in the colours we want.

Tanya

Veteran

What a clever and insightful post, Shannon, I am deeply impressed. It sounds that you made the right decision. it is to get swayed by all the beautiful things we see here on the forum.
Mochi, that is hilarious!

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