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The bra saga continues

Elly

Veteran

I have posted twice before about my saga to try to find a well-fitting bra without driving 6-12 hours to be fitted.

I finally thought that I had my size narrowed down when I notice the dreaded armpit boob making a show.

Ladies here pointed me toward the Venusian bra blog and I tried a couple of the styles they suggested, as well as my favorite style of the ones I had ordered previously (the one I posted pictures of).

After reading theories on bra adjusting and migrating breast tissue I gave 30 Fs, FFs, Gs (UK) and the American equivalents. I also tried a band size up and had previously tried a band size down.

I put on a G cup and suddenly the side boob isn't an issue-- the FF doesn't seem to have a wide enough underwire (even in Panache and Chantelle) pull all the tissue under the arm into, but the G is borderline too big in the cup.

I am also having problems with straps cutting into me--- moreso with the bigger cup bras. I am wondering if I need to go down a back size since the cups fit better and I don't have any breast tissue under the band anymore. That would mean a 28 G or GG/H though.

I also find that shirts that fit with my old bras and even with the 30 Fs I thought I should be wearing don't fit with these bras. That is frustrating since that means I will have to return them and I already have a horrible time with fit.

Any suggestions ladies? I just thought I would give an update. Also, anyone willing to comment on how high up under the arm and how far back into the armpit their professionally fitted bras go? I am still not sure whether I am now covering too much flesh with the cup or was previously mistake as to how much of my fatty tissue was actually breasts! Either way, how embarrassing to not be able to identify what is what on your own body! LOL

Shopping

23 replies

Latest reply was from Mo

Vildy

Veteran

No advice, sorry, but I was wondering in what way the old shirts don't fit with the
new bras. Sometimes you read that people measure smaller in the legendary correct
fitting bra.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

I can't help but can commisserate - I have the same armpit fleshy problem and I'm between 2 cup sizes as well. Let me know what solutions you find! I so far am happiest with my Natori bra made for 'not quite' sizes but it's not perfect. Fits fine but doesn't flatter as much as I'd like.

Queen Mum

Veteran

I can't help but wonder if you are being too... I dont' want to say picky, because that sounds bad, but too... self conscience? I mean, unless you have o% body fat, isn't there going to be a bit of fleshiness in the armpit area? Perhaps what you are thinking is extra breast tissue is just normal armpit flesh. Are you talking about that little bit of flesh between your upper arm and upper breast area when your arms are down to your side? I think that is normal isn't it?

mrseccentric

(website)

Veteran

oy, Elly! you are truly experiencing the trials of Job with this! i don't know, at this point it may be worth your while to go get a pro involved. It's sounding like you're just getting confused about what's what, and can't really put your finger on what would be a good fit. You've put so much time and effort and mental energy into this without finding 'the holy grail' that bringing in a trusted pro could be the quickest way to a satisfactory conclusion.

My underwires don't seem to go into my armpits at all. FWIW.

i'd be interested in your answer to Vildy's question about the difference in fit. Good luck, Elly - i hope you get some happiness in this arena soon : ) steph

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Elly, like you I am a small band size. But unlike you, I'm also a very small cup size. And I'm hardly a bra professional. So please take my thoughts with the big grain of salt they probably deserve!

First, my sympathy. Even though my sizing problem is a bit different, I know what it is like not to be able to find a well-fitting bra! In my case, I am too big for the petite bras (my cup size is too large) but too small for the regular size bras (the few that exist) in band size 28 or 30, most of which begin at a D. OY!

However. In my best fitting bras, the underwire does not come up under the armpit. It stops considerably lower than that. But if I were to raise my arm, the seam that the underwire's contained in is IN LINE with my underarm, if that makes sense. You could draw a line from there to my underarm.

As for spillage on the side, I tend to think some will depend on body type. I don't just mean breast size and shape. I mean where you tend to collect body fat. Some of us have more back/underarm fat than others. And also, even on a very slim woman with almost no boobage (like me) when I first tried on an almost correct band size, I had what looked like back fat. I was appalled but the SA assured me this was the way it was supposed to be. Sure enough, after a few wears, the back fat mysteriously disappeared, and in fact, it turns out I should have been in an even SMALLER size band, which I can only assume would have led to even more of a back/underarm fat appearance when I first bought it.

This is just food for thought. I really think a professional fitting is THE way to go. It will be money so well spent and you will feel comfortable. My bras are not perfect now but they are about 1000 times better than what I was wearing before.

Anonymous

This website has some side photos that might be helpful:

http://www.breakoutbras.com/sizing

Astrid

Veteran

I just wanted to say that I myself need bras that have very wide wires, but aren't too deep in the cup. I often don't fill the cups when the underwire holds everything it should and if I choose a smaller cup the underwires dig into my breasts. I have better luck with balconette styles than with full cups, because these have always too much fabric. I'm smaller than you though, I wear a 30DD. I also wanted to add that you very well may be able to fill out a cup that is slightly too big now in a few weeks if you start to wear the right underband size now. I had to go one cup size up because of breast tissue migration.

Patty

Veteran

I'm thinking road trip!!
Find a friend or two and pack some tunes--it could be the Bras for Babes Adventure. Altho it sounds like an adventure already--hope it gets figured out for you soon!

Christelle

Oh my goodness! I can SOOO commiserate with you and MAYBE even help you! I have dealt with the bra-fitting issue for almost 10 years after "blossoming" into a 32G after my first baby. I've tried them all. Let me tell you, if you think it's hard finding a regular bra in these sizes, try finding a NURSING bra in these sizes *eyeroll* I have shed many a tear and ordered (and promptly returned) more bras than I even remember.

I was going to post the BreakoutBras sizing link, but I see someone else already did. They have great pictures and instructions.

I've found that the UK bras fit me worlds better than the U.S. size equivalents. I love Panache's Tango II bras as well as their strapless styles. When I'm in a pinch and need a bra RIGHT NOW, I buy Panache because I'm confident in the fit. Now THAT said, Panache bras in our large cup size have VERY deep underwires that often poke me in the armpit, so I don't wear them on a daily basis, all day long. They are my go-to bras when I need lots of support and shaping and am willing to put up with some discomfort to look especially great ; )

To address the side-boob issue, your underwires should be further back than you're probably used to. Not ALL the way to the back, but definitely UNDERNEATH your armpit, not in front of it, if that makes any sense. So like, when you put your arm straight down, it should cover your underwire.

Your straps should not be digging into your shoulders. You should be able to hook the band in the back, leave the straps hanging down, and still have PLENTY of support. If your boobs start to sag, then you need to get a smaller band.

I buy most of my bras from BreakoutBras.com because they have free shipping, carry alot of the UK styles and sizes and are really helpful if you call on the phone. I currently wear nursing bras from Bella Materna (their website is having issues right now so I can't post a direct link, but it's just bellamaterna.com). Their band sizes seem to run a tad small, so you MIGHT be able to fit into their 34 band, and they have cup sizes up to G and even H in a couple styles. They're nursing bras, but they can alter them to make them normal ; ) They have "shorter" underwires than Panache, so I don't have to deal with the wires in my armpit issue.

I have to run for now, but I'll keep thinking and if I come up with any other ideas for you, I'll come back : ) I certainly know how frustrating it is to try to find something as simple as a bra! Hang in there! You'll gain alot of experience and knowledge as well as eventually end up with a bra that you feel confident in : )

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I really like what Christelle says about the wire should be under your arm when your arm is straight down. That makes a lot of sense.

elpgal

Veteran

Elly, Another thought - even if you are unable to find any mainstream places like Nordies for bra-fitting, there may be someone who fits prosthetics or a lactation consultant who may be able to help. I have no experience with either type of fitter, but just passing along some intertube wisdom.

Scarlet

Veteran

I can't offer any help because I am not good at these things, but I have been following your threads because bras also drive me nuts and I have some issues in common with you, so this is more like a thank you for posting. I guess what frustrates me the most with bras is that somehow my boobs are the first part of my body to indicate a little weight gain or loss, so even once I have the issue sorted, it changes.

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

Sorry to hear this saga continues. I like Patty's suggestion of making that trip. You want to be able to experiment with a lot of different styles and sizes. The mail approach would be time consuming and expensive, at least while it sits on your credit card before returning.

Elly

Veteran

Thanks ladies-- some good suggestions and good information.

I took a look at the bras I had at hand atm and for the most part found that the band size is probably a little too big and the cups are a tiny bit too small in one size and a little to big in the next size. I couldn't get the larger size in a 28 in all but a couple of bras, so I would have to buy larger and alter, argh.

I would love to go get fit, but I can't imagine finding the time to drive all the way to Denver or Phoenix and then only be able to be in the actual city for a day because of the expense of hotels, ect. Even driving one day, shopping one day, and driving home another day would mean probably a travel budget of 250 dollars plus meals and the actual shopping-- which is pretty expensive for a 3-day weekend with my current circumstance. I could fly to Denver for less than it costs to drive (80 bucks round trip) but then would have to find transportation around the city and would still have motel costs.

mrseccentric

(website)

Veteran

re:expenses of traveling - you could do like my brother and leave at 2am, spend the day, then drive like a bat out of he77, full of caffeine, until you arrive home strung out and exhausted : )

or, maybe not!! he's on the road to come visit right now, it's always kind of nerve-wracking!

FWIW, it you have to alter the band.....i've done it and it is no big deal. if your bra has side support, just place it so the seam is right next to the bone and it's not noticeable at all. if you skin is tender and prone to chafing, place the seam allowance on the outside and stitch it down. if your straps tend to slide down your shoulders, do the alteration right next to the clasp - this will bring the straps closer to the middle, helping them to stay up.

it's not the 'prince charming' solution. but i've done this on older bras and (with non-stretch cups) you get another couple of years wear out of them. Frankly i find it is just as good, support and shape-wise, as getting a new bra. I've even just used safety pins to take up the excess and it works well (too much info!)

anyways, best of luck!! steph

KikiG

Veteran

I think sometimes there are just tradeoffs.

I went up a cup size (DD) to contain everything under the arm, and I accidentally ended up with breasts that were visually wider than my ribcage, and that displaced my arms a little bit. The underwire was on the side of my body. I wondered why all the clothes I tried on looked so terrible, and why I looked so busty and dumpy, and finally, after months, the light went on. I went down a cup size to D to get my breasts back on the front of my body, the wire is a couple of inches more forward, and I look a lot better in clothing now. Is the fit perfect? No, not perfect, but my goal wasn't to win a "best bra fit" award, it was to look nice in my clothes.

Queen Mum

Veteran

kiki- are you wearing seamed bras? I find that my few unseamed bras are the ones that give that breast spread, but a properly fitting seamed bra should keep the girls front and center.

BUT you are absolutely right that sometimes there are tradeoffs and perhaps at times we are being a bit too overly critical about the tiny details.

KikiG

Veteran

Queen Mum, I am not wearing seamed bras--my current crop of bras are all identical but for color and they are molded cup--and so were the problem bras--the Soma bras that are designed to eliminate back fat (which they did, to their credit). I have learned a lot from this forum, and the next time I go bra shopping, I will try some seamed bras to see if they are magic on me.

Queen Mum

Veteran

Kiki-- I converted to seamed bras a year or so ago, and haven't looked back. I do have a few of my former unseamed bras that I reserve for putting on when I need to throw something on real quick to drive kids to school, but for daily wear, it's my seamed bras all the way.

Back to you Elly... I do hope you find what works for you soon. If I lived in Denver I'd pick you up from the airport and take you bra shopping for the day. Perhaps you might post some pics in a locked photobucket account and invite a few ladies who you trust to view and offer feedback....

Elly

Veteran

Steph-- thanks for the alterations tip. I had seen it done next to the clasp, but it would make much more sense and looks easier at that seam for me.

QM-- that was very sweet of you! I might have to do the photobucket.

As an update, I called everyone that fits bras in a 150 mile (4-5 hour radius) and no one sells any 28-30 band bras and none of them alter, so I although I am sure they might show me some tips about correct fit (if they are honest and don't just try to sell me a bra that doesn't fit to make a buck) I couldn't have a bra fitted on me correctly. I find band size hugely impacts cup size and visa/versa. I can fit into a much smaller cup in a bigger band (even taking into account the one up/one down rule) than I could with a proper band size. I have one retailer that sells a more obscure and expensive UK brand that says if I drive 4 hours for a fitting she could order some in and I could drive another 4 hours to see if they work. This is a very high end boutique and should be knowledgeable, but I have my doubts since the fitter claims they don't care 30s because of how rare the size is. As a big person, I sincerely doubt that all of the women that aren't a L/XL out there are 32/36s-- especially since it is a shop that requires fitting. None of the retailers sell any of the more affordable/mainstream brands offered in my band/cup size-- which means I couldn't do the usual and pick up duplicates on sale/on ebay cheaply elsewhere.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Honestly, I would probably do mail order before I'd do such a long drive for a size that's not even what you're looking for.
At the risk of embarassing myself, here is my armpit fat - is this the problem you are having? This bra seems to fit best around towards my armpit, yet there is still that little ahem, cutlet. I think it's kinda unavoidable, honestly.

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Elly

Veteran

Same type of armpit fat--- I thought it was unavoidable too until I went up two cup sizes and I put on a 30 G and pinned up the extra band. The cutlet disappears/ is held in entirely, but i get a slight wrinkle on or under the cup-- a tiny tiny bit of extra room. With a lot of fussing I usually can smooth it out, but it always returns. The other issue being pulling as much tissue as possible into he cups--- there is some tissue I can't pull into a 30 F cup that I can in a 28 or 30 FF and idk if it really needs to be in the cups-- but it leaves less side/back fat even with a tight band in a FF. The difference between FF and G is the cutlet or part of it sticking out.

And way to go Mo--- second brave lady on YLF! Thanks for posting a visual for me.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

It's not easy - but it helps to know you're not alone!! I'd be curious to see if I could ever 'wrangle' this tissue into a cup lol. And I think the pics won't be up long
For me, even though my bust is by no means large, it is relatively low on my torso. Not sure how that affects my fit . . .