Yes to Sarah's suggestion: which ones do you wanna wear?
As for the suede mini skirt: I'd wear with a boxy cropped, welted or tucked sweater, textured tights and stompy boots. or with a turtleneck and an oversized blazer layered over (or is that too eighties?)

Liesbeth, so if a sweater, then with some volume (if tucked then bloused over a bit, sort of mimicking the effect of a welt?) In your first paragraph, are you asking me which I want to wear? I’m trying to figure out what to do with #1, which has a bit of a flare to it. So maybe close-fitting first layer, with something cropped over it? Color-wise, I think the tall brown boots or my navy oxfords are the best match. That’s a bit awkward, because they both have higher heels than I’d usually wear with a skirt that short, but maybe the flare will make it better?

I think this blog and forum is more about styling new clothes than older clothes. I don’t think that is explicitly stated anywhere but I notice it. There are obvious exceptions like Shevia who is a thrift shopper with great skill. But for most Fabbers there seems more enthusiasm expressed for new things.
And you do ask a lot of questions in a lot of detail about how to style this or that item, which may take more effort to respond to than people are willing to give. I need to be in a particularly good mood to be able to give detailed suggestions and often don’t feel up to it!

Nemo, you might have out your finger on it there—something not working this year is not the same to me as never working/trash it. I think other people see them as the same thing—if it can’t be worn now, then get rid of it. Thanks! You have made a lot of very helpful comments recently—to me and others. I appreciate it

Forum members participate when they want to, not because they've been assigned homework, so to speak.

Yes, I meant a sweater with some volume. Though ribbed bodycon pieces are making a comeback, I feel that the combination with a mini can only be pulled off by a curveless teenager ;p.
Skirt 1 is one I like but can't immediately see styled. Maybe play around? It does seem like a neutral pattern so I wouldn't exclude black or brown flat shoes - heels, like you say, can be tricky with a mini and wouldn't look as current imo.

Lisa P, lol. “Assigning homework”. More like I set out a bunch of hockey sticks, was confused no one wanted to play, and have now learned the difference between different kinds of skates and that y’all are figure skating or racing. See JenniNZ’s post. Never occurred to me that styling =/= styling, or that people would have a preference for styling either new or old clothes.

Thanks Liesbeth! I think you’re absolutely right about anything fitted with the suede mini. Good thought on neutral flats with the other one too. I have a purple knit blazer that might pick up the purple in the weave on that one, but I’m not sure it’s the right length, will have to give it a try.

This is a disturbing thread. A lot of people took the time to give you really well thought out advice and suggestions. It is hard for me to understand what you wanted from the Forum. It feels like you are blaming the Forum for not giving you something you needed, but I am not sure what that is.

I disagree with Jenni about this Forum only being about new clothing. All the responses on these threads are evidence that the Forum tried to be helpful.

Styling does equate to styling, regardless of the age of the garment. It always has and it always will. Part of the problem may be the Forum tried to help you ascertain which garments were not worth the effort of trying to style them. This advice was communicated in kind/thoughtful comments that you were unwilling to hear.

What I am reading is that you want to keep every single garment in the box. If this is the case, by all means, do so.

I caution you against this though. Not because the garment is older, but because some pieces communicate nonverbal, unflattering messages about the wearer. I have witnessesed this firsthand in real life. Several Forum members tried to tell you so with respect and kindness. And yes, you did get snarky.

If there is a flaw in the Forum, it is that many members are too nice.

Comment retracted .

Sterling, I agree with you that it’s disturbing. I honestly don’t know where you guys are picking up that tone from my expression of surprise. I’m sorry it came across like that, as it was certainly not my intent. I was surprised/
disappointed that people weren’t as enthused as I was, but disappointment is not the same as scolding. I’m not keeping everything from the box—the shirt and pants posts have items that are clearly out; on this post I’m going to get rid of the long suede skirt. I’m not sure about all that “middle” stuff. Maybe I’ll want to wear it one day and will take the time to style it, maybe I won’t, but there are some items I’ve gotten good styling suggestions about. I appreciate them and have said so. What do you think; is it a good idea to do posts “workshopping” any of this stuff? I asked Carla, but she hasn’t replied (not that she has to, just that I’m still wondering).

I’m sorry if I caused any distress. It was never my intent.

I do think you could get valuable information from workshops. I hope you consider doing some.

The best outfit lab posts feature one or maybe two pieces at a time , and with as few pictures / choices as possible . There has to be at least a basic level of fashion and styling knowledge in order to see the most participation . Also helps to be specific about where you intend to wear the outfit . For work ? Volunteering ? To classes ? To sporting events ? Lunch dates with friends ? Dinner parties ? Whatever it is - it helps put random pieces of clothing in better context . For example : I want to wear this brown skirt to visit clients in my job as ——-. Which of these two sweaters conveys the most approachable and professional look? Which of these two pair of boots are best ? That kind of thing .

Feedback is complex. Forums are complex.

I have had all of the below:

1) Feedback that something was dated when I still loved it and I ignored the feedback which was the right thing to do.
2) Feedback that something was dated which I ignored and actually it was dated and I should have listened.
3) Feedback that something was flattering/great when it was not that great in real life or just actually not right for me.
4) Feedback that something was flattering/stylish that helped me make decisions over keeping/discarding. This is the most common and one of the things I love about the forum.

Mostly (as in over 80%) of the time I find forum feedback really helpful, kind, wise and pointing me in the right direction. But some things photograph better than others - and we all live in different places with different norms and hang ups and lifestyles. Trends matter more to some than others - how flattering it is - and even how skimpy/short it is. I have been underdressed in the UK and over dressed in the US because I didn't understand the norms.

Some days I will spend a long time on the forum - other days I skim through - some days I don't read at all. My replies vary based on my mood and what I can offer to the thread (I can't offer with finding pieces or shopping recommendations so rarely chime in). If I am on my phone compared to my laptop my ability to see and wade through photos is less.

I have decided that if I put it to the forum I have to listen to what comes back. It is not the only thing I listen to - my friends, my family, my own judgement are also important.

With older clothes and keeping them, I think the key is to wear them in a different way than you wore them say ten years ago. Not always but often. I am going to think about that this week for Carla's oldies but goodies challenge, and this could be a great chance to workshop a couple of pieces.

The issue, I think, in a personal style. All forum’s members have their own style but there are certain similarities. So, the suggestions on how to style an item are based on that and on massive visuals available online. If one has a style that is outside of mainstream, it is hard to give any suggestions, they might be well intended but not appealing to a wearier.

Sal’s response is brilliant! I don’t think the forum is *all* about styling new clothes, I thought that in my experience there seems more enthusiasm for newer than older clothes in general. I could be wrong. Carla’s challenge may be fun looking at older ones.
Lisap’s suggestion on the best way to do outfit labs above are really good too.
I definitely contribute more to the forum when I am feeling relaxed and not stressed. This year has been hard so it is easier to just skim the posts than put much effort into replying, at times. I do put effort in at times when I feel up to it because I am most grateful for all the kind help I have had in the nearly 4 years I have belonged.

Wow. What wonderful comments. I marvel at the thought and the wisdom that this forum has to offer.

Yes lots of good feedback here. I generally find that for me, Angie is 100% right, so it is great that she has helped to pick the winners here. I love Brooklyn’s idea of turning the dress in #11 into a skirt. I hope you have had fun running through these clothes. Wardrobe edits can be hard because of the memories associated with different garments. I remember I had one skirt and top and at first I loved it, I just felt fabulous when wearing it. Then some years later, I had a colleagues engagement party to attend and put on the same outfit and it felt flat and dated. I wore it, and felt off all night. That made me realise, that even if I love something now, that may not last forever and to listen to my emotions. There is zero point in wearing something that makes you feel awful in, at least if you own other clothing that you prefer.

Bijou, you are quite right about older outfits generally not working. Older items, as several people have said in Carla’s post, can be reworked in new ways. It can be hard to envision things you’ve had a while in new mixes. One thing I’ve learned here is that asking other people to brainstorm those new mixes can be fraught, with some people happily tossing out ideas while others feel very differently.

LisaP, thanks for those tips. Please do weigh in on my workshop posts (if you’d like—but it’s not homework!)

Sal, thanks for understanding that not immediately agreeing is not thumbing your nose at people. You showed that in your earlier response to my reply about the track suit hoodie, and now have enunciated it. I’m surprised at the level of emotion (beyond simple “hey, lookit what I got!”) in this thread, especially because it seems to come from people’s response to my attempts to engage them in a back-and-forth about their comments. Other commenters stuck to the clothes topic—my guess is that they agree with me that replying is how you show you’re paying attention. It’s sort of the other side of intending kindness by what I consider snubbing. Live & learn.

I’m off to play happily with some of the things that have been returned to me.

I'd try not to overanalyze responses , or lack thereof . Pushing for more isn't the best way to engage and develop long term forum relationships. There are many ways to develop style and to work out how you want to dress with what you have : instagram, pinterest, fashion magazines, blogs , store displays, etc etc. At some point you need to be able to trust your own eye instead of asking for feedback on every item you own and engaging in a debate over every response. I understand that not everyone finds fashion and style easy or organic, but it's like me going onto a chess forum (yes, I watched The Queen's Gambit last night) and spending two years hounding Grand Masters about beginner level moves and where to buy the best chess boards . Perhaps there are other blogs or forums which discuss dressing and style in a way that might make more sense to you .

Participants will engage when interested and when there is also something in it for them. I don't jump in on every thread on this forum , nor does anyone else here . I write when I have something to say or when an outfit or look particularly speaks to me. Or when I feel I have something to learn , but I also don't ask a hundred questions about it . I don't participate in your posts mostly because I have no idea what's going in them . There are too many references to what other people on the forum are saying and how you don't understand them. At best they are frustrating.

Thanks Lisa. I don’t mean to badger grandmasters. It sounds to me like you are using “debate” to mean a negative interaction. My natural instinct is to say “is that how you think most people see my follow-up questions”. Don’t answer that—I’m just laughing at myself and my own clearly deep-running instincts about having a conversation. But I would like to hear what you think of the post I’m about to put up. Is it the kind of thing you think is fully developed enough to be worth it?

Can I lobby for the long suede skirt, I have seen more A-lines recently. And 22 has the same shape as some current dresses, would it work with some of the knee high boots you are keeping?

Cat2, interesting question about that skirt and tall boots, because one sentiment that’s been repeated a lot here and particularly on Carla’s post that started with a JenniNZ quote from here is that wearing older items requires remixing them. Those tall brown boots are exactly what I wore with the skirt bitd.

Oh god. No one is a grandmaster here. It's a figure of speech. And yes, debates are tedious, to me anyways. Perhaps more appropriate in an intellectual/academic setting, but even all that talking and interrupting and rejecting and postulating makes me want to walk away.

Wow, I just read this looong thread, which you pointed me to from the tail end of another one (the fashion tribes business) that was getting weird. You've gotten a a great deal of thoughtful conversation here, though perhaps not the validation you had hoped for. But that's the nature of peer review I had the impression from your remark on the other thread that you were suggesting that members did not like to discuss your questions.

I am in general a fan of short skirts (in the main because I am short and they make my legs look longer.) I recognize they are not completely au courant these days. If I were going to buy one, it would be more like the one in the find here. The ones you're showing appear dated and worn in various ways to me, and I would suggest eliminating them. I like the plaid skirt, maybe, but it's hard to see completely in the photo. And the berry-purple dress.

I just ordered a pair of Uniqlo glitter heat tech tights this week.

Thanks Ummlila! Always interesting to hear a variety of viewpoints. Interesting point about not all "short" skirts being equally short. Maybe that's why my post about the pinny yesterday got a good response--it is above the knees, but considerably longer than some of these. You are quite right about the nature of peer review--I asked people's opinion and appreciate hearing them. My only issues are the notion that I should discard things permanently instead of setting them aside for another season and that I'm surprised at some people getting angry that I asked them questions. I think I already mentioned (somewhere) the other thing that seems weird to me--people acting like ignoring stuff, just staying quiet even when asked a question, as is common in the forum, is somehow kind/helpful/polite.

FashIntern, I was the one who suggested to get rid of a lot of what you posted. Here is my explanation why, if you’re interested. I have a different approach to my wardrobe. I like to keep it curated, where everything works right now. I feel bad if I have items of clothes that just sit unworn for years. I might keep a thing or two, that fits but not my current style. I would go back later and reassess. I also look for potential in an item if altering it would make it work. I have a mid size wardrobe, I feel overwhelmed if it grows too much. I don’t want unwearable now clothes to take valuable space.
There are others that keep larger wardrobe and inclined to keep their clothes in a holding zone for a while. My advice to you is based on my own approach, on what I would do. But we are all different. When asking a question, one should keep it mind.

I agree here with Irina. We are all different and we can give you advice only from our own standpoint. I would feel stressed and overwhelmed keeping all those items that may or may not work one undefined day in the future. And if something is feeling dated this year, what are the chances that it will work next year. I know you like short skirts, but you look much more current in longer ones. But I may be biased because I am traumatized by a coworker who wears skirts like those and I have seen more than I ever wanted especially if she happens to climb stairs in front of me or is sitting in a meeting across of me

Here's the thing: staying quiet or "ignoring" a question is not just a matter of being polite. I don't always go back to a thread I've commented on to make sure a question hasn't been posed of me . I will if I'm really invested in the topic or the poster, but I don't do it all the time. Who has time for that? I'm doing it here for some bizarre psychological compulsion to increase my blood pressure before heading off to work, I guess . Plus, too many questions are tedious, maybe not to you, but ....

Lastly, not having anything to say is better than putting it all out there. That never ends well If my thoughts are polar opposite to the poster's, I won't say anything . For example, I personally think short/mini skirts are odd on women our age, although I'm guessing you're younger than me. Doesn't mean they are wrong, just that I don't care for them and have zero interest in figuring out how to wear them .

I think I have (in my holding zone) the same skirt as yours in the nr 1:-)- is it an UK brand Next? Then, I probably unvillingly skipped some paragraphs/comments too, but whoa was it an exhausting read... I came here from one another exhausting and disturbing thread---and glad I did as (in many regards) I learned here a lot again -but now am too tired to comment in deeper detail on the box's content- even if some have potential (14, 16, 21,... perhaps 23, too).