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;) Taking the plunge ;)

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Hold your nose and dive in, cause here it comes. My body isn't where I want it to be, neither shape nor location, but here is a first sort-through, figure out the style post.

Rachylou, you wanted them in fives. This is close. It took me a few tries to get the best set up. Does this one work? There are other options, of course. Please see my questions to Meredith in the comments.

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by Stagiaire Fash

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Dressing

100 replies

Latest reply was from Laura G

Meredith

Veteran

Hi fashionern, for those of us who haven't read all of your posts can you let us know what type of feedback you're wanting? Is this a keep/toss post? I think you did a good job with the photos (I like that we can see details) but we probably need full-length shots or at the very least don't cut off the bottom gen of the shirt. Selfies are so hard but you'll get the hang of it.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Meredith, thanks for the photo advice and the question about what kind of advice I'm looking for! I took more pix before I saw it. Should I go back and redo these? Do you really need my whole body, down to my feet, or does the bathroom mirror like I used here work? Should I take multiple views of each item? When I add more, should I edit the original post or add comments?

Next time I'll wear pants, or at least shorts. I'm thinking a very basic pair of grey shorts would be least distracting. When I do toppers, is a plain white T-shirt a good thing to wear under them?

My body and lifestyle are in flux, so I'm going to have huge holding zones. Right now I'm looking for feedback on condition and fit (but even fit is a little awkward, because of changing body). I'm also trying to come up with my style, from a combination of wardrobe items. That's the conversation I'm most looking forward to.

What I'm thinking about style so far: colorful, RATE, disruptive, and I'd love to mix patterns and genres. From the "basic blouses" here, it's pretty clear I like fancy, but I've never figured out how to wear these in the playful, ironic way I'd like to without looking like Meatloaf. I'm not going for wild and high drama. I want to "officially" obey "the rules", and tease a sense of fun. But I don't know how to do that.

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Jenni NZ

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I can see above that you say "this is a first sort-through, figure out the style post".
Now I think I have been reading all your posts and love your enthusiasm for the task and your sense of humour and also thoughtfulness. But it is a bit difficult to keep up! I haven't had time yet to think properly about your shoes. But from one post where you said "culling, what's that?" I suspect your biggest issue is having too much stuff and much of it not serving you well. I have eclectic tastes and a resistance to culling also.
These blouses, I notice pin tucks on two of them. Think that says something about your style right there. You like detail and a slightly peasant vibe?

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

Which of these were you excited to put on? Which do you love? In konmari terms, do any of these "spark joy"? There's something to be said for having some great everyday essentials in your closet, but your personal style lies in the pieces and combinations that make you the most happy.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

#10 is polyester and has shoulder pads. I think it's going out.

#11 & 12 (same blouse): why do I have a shirt with French cuffs when I don't have cuff links? Idk, but I'd rather resolve this by getting cufflinks than by ditching the top.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Jenni NZ, I think that comment was a comment on someone else's post. Paying that much attention is a real compliment and favor, thank you! I'd like to hear what you have to say about the shoes, but note the comment that says one pair is out and two more are on trial.

I'm happy to hear you say "slow down". In Angie's description of this process, she says to do it in about a day. That sounds impossible! I was thinking that since I'd started with the solid long-sleeves blouses, I had to at least get through the pattern and short-sleeves ones today too, between everything else.

Detail and slightly peasant, hm. I'm taking all such questions as suggestions. My initial response is that I don't like boring or fussy. I like tailored but not binding, and flowing as long as it doesn't obscure the body or catch on things. So I guess peasant fits.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

I don't think Angie's suggestion works for hoarders with a resistance to culling. I really gulp almost every time I put something in either the hospice shop ( for resale to benefit their charity) or in the "clothing bin" ( sold to a second-hand commercial enterprise if good enough, or else made into rags). I have issues with sunk cost, memories, psychological issues, guilt... Which is why over time buying less will suit me better now that I have a good wardrobe I can happily wear that is in good nick and that mostly suits me. I am managing to cull very slowly but find it hard.

The Cat

Veteran

Fashiontern, you seem to have a colourful, fun, informal, strong and unique personality. And ideally, your clothes should reflect who you are. So I am not sure that rather conservative shirts in white or beige are the best choices for you. They may be too boring and/or strict-looking.
Of the shirts you have shown here, I think the coloured ones look best, especially #6.
When I look at #14, I get a glimpse of tops/blouses in more exciting shapes, colours and prints, which may be more "you". I look forward to seeing you in some of them.
Besides, I guess you look great in sweaters/jumpers/pullovers.

Meredith

Veteran

Thanks for the additional detail. I like the lighting in your first batch to see details but the bathroom mirror version is very useful in understanding proportions.

Most of these tops are quite short. The sides especially cut up and look to be hitting at or just below where the waistband of your pants should be. That's okay, but I think that length will limit what you can wear them with.

The length on 11 is better in my opinion. 2, 6(great color), 7, 9, and 11 seem like they have the most potential to me. The others seem too slim-cut or short and will be more difficult to style.

I like fancy tops too, although I gravitate towards blouses over shirts. I like to wear them over simple cropped pants that are either skinny or slightly roomy. Maybe that's a combination you could try.

kkards

Veteran

Fashiontern...I'm going out on a limb here, and pardon me if offend, it's not my intention. Are many of this shirts and blouses hold overs from before you gained and lost the weight? I ask because, althought it's hard to see, many seem to look a little tired and the fits seem to be of all over the place- some seem to fit really well and some just seem to be swallowing you.
I'd probably start by doing a quick check for spots, holes and other general signs of disrepair. Then decide what can be fixed and what's to far gone. Good luck

Jenni NZ

Veteran

OK. 10 is going, I agree, shoulder pads are out of date by a couple of decades (having said that I still have a few salted away) and also it is too short and looks a bit tired.
I don't like 13, it is floppy, bit long in the sleeves, looks tired.
11/12 is a better length, Meredith likes it also, and you can find some cuff links on sale that might match with a skirt or jacket or pants you may wear it with and/or get shared with your son later. So it can be a keeper and a bit of fun finding cuff links.
2 is nice, love the pin tucks, I think it suits you.
3 looks a bit dark on you? But you are smiling happily so maybe you like it? Maybe one in that colour would allow variety.
4 and 5 are so similar. I think I prefer 4 but Meredith prefers 5. I personally prefer 4 as a better fit and as you want to lose more weight, think you may swim in 5.
Agree with Meredith that 6 is good, a pretty colour.
7 has pretty lace detail but the sleeves are too long?
8 I am sorry I find it boring and tired. You don't seem at all boring so why wear boring? ( Purely my opinion that it's boring though, you and others may not think so.)
9 is my fave, I love the neck detail. Interesting!
I've done 10-13 already.
In summary, I would keep 2, 4, 6, 9, 11 ,
and 3 if you like the dark green.
I would cull 5, 7, 8, 10 and 13. So keeping five-six shirts out of eleven. Still plenty really.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Then separate comment regarding the coral. I like the pin tucks again and the colour.

The Cat

Veteran

Jenni, I am afraid I have to correct you, as I have NOT mentioned neither 11/12 nor 5,

The Cat

Veteran

Pleased to see that Jenni has now removed my name from her comments to 11/12 and 5.

rachylou

Veteran

My votes to keep: the green, the blue, the aqua, the white with the rosette pattern (pics 2-6 & 9). I actually like the soft collar of 10, best on you, but agree about the shoulders.

I'm not feeling the stiff white button down for you... I don't feel it for myself either.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Jenn, the ones that came close to making me happy when I put them on were probably 2, 6, & 7. I'm not sure what it was about 2. Could be the color, or the fit, or the happy memories I have in it. 6 & 7 look unassuming, but there's embroidery down the front of 6 and 7 has those little darts under the bust. But I don't know as any of them "sparked joy". Trying on clothes is not something I enjoy doing.

Anonymous

In terms of figuring out your style or look ( and forgive me if this has already been addressed in another post - I haven't read them all - and have a limited attention span for tons of photos , I have to admit ) have you built that framework for yourself yet ? It seems to me that one needs to have an idea in place before you go crashing through your closet on a mission . Do you use Pinterest ? It's a great tool . Every time I think I have some new plan for what I want to be wearing , I go back to my pinterest boards to remind me of what I'm truly drawn to . And as far as not having your body in the condition or location ( whatever that means) you wish it were ....well , welcome to the club . There are many of us here who struggle with that ; I'm personally committed to keeping those thoughts and struggles to myself with the knowledge that it's always a work in progress for any woman , and that positivity goes a long long way to getting on with things . Anyways , once you have established your style goal , it should be easy to power through the clothes that aren't 10/10's . ( this coming from someone who can't manage to do a thorough edit herself , lol)

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Yes sorry The Cat. Had just submitted it and was re-reading and saw it was Meredith not you, so fixed it before you said. Looking back and forth at pics and writing a reply is quite tiring, can mix up who said what!

The Cat

Veteran

Jenni, it's OK. I understand. Thank you for fixing it so quickly.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

It is quite hard to figure what one's style is though if you have no idea when you start, Lisap do you think? I initially did it in 2010 by pulling out old photos from my albums from birth of stuff I liked on my mother and then on myself from about 17 years old when I was more able to choose for my own taste rather than her choosing. I was about to see a stylist at that point and I wanted to give her a feel for me, what my taste was. I was 49 years old at that stage and it did help to do that.

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

I second Lisa's Pinterest suggestion. That helped me a lot when I was trying to figure out my style and now, I do the same thing she does, going back to my boards when I start to get grabby.

To some extent, you're skipping the fun part to do the hard part!

Anonymous

Jenni - I don't think of it as a dig through history - in fact I'm not sure what purpose that would serve . The Pinterest thing is a bit of a test or game : looking at images and saving the ones that you are immediately drawn to . Then go back in and sort them out by common denominator . Eliminate those that seem to be one-offs . Figure out the commonalities between the others . It's not a life time commitment - it's making a decision based on gut instinct and going from there . Sometimes I think that there is such as thing as over-thinking our attraction to art ( which is what this is ) . You like it , then go for it . Fit is where we can spend time thinking .

Anonymous

Btw- I do apologize if what I wrote sounds snappish . It's not my intent but I don't find it easy to articulate my thoughts most times . I know tone can be misunderstood .

Jenni NZ

Veteran

No, it's cool. The purpose the history-trawling served for me is that sometimes I have got an almost irrational love for certain clothes. I've been like that since a little girl. I no longer had a photo of the first dress I really chose for myself- saw it in a window aged 13 and fell hard. It was seersucker, turquoise top half and white bottom half with daisies, slightly fit and flare I think. 1974! And I still remember it so clearly, I went home and pestered Mum ( Mom!) to see if she would buy it for me and she did. It just made my heart sing. And many other clothes and shoes have done that. So the history-trawling was to look for any commonalities that became apparent. There were quite a few. I think it served a similar purpose to the Pinterest game. Either method may appeal to Fashiontern. For my method to work, you have to remember what you loved at the time rather than getting any self-loathing and "what was I thinking?" recriminations happening. It involved self-love rather than self-hatred so wouldn't work for everyone.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Lisa, can you explain to me how Pinterest is helpful? I've heard other people mention it too, and I just don't get it. There are pictures of people in there, but I see people all the time. How will looking at those pictures there show me what I'm drawn to more than looking at the things I've collected? I hope this doesn't come across as snarky, because that isn't at all how I mean it. I have recently started to see how gathering images of what I want for my home can work on there, but I'm still not convinced it's better than having a simple list with links. But you are talking about something several steps beyond that, and I don't get it at all. How do you use it?

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

Not Lisa, but I remembered a thread on Pinterest from not too long ago (there have been lots), that might give you some ideas:
https://youlookfab.com/welookf.....-pinterest

I use it in two ways (for style purposes). One is kind of a mood board of how I want my wardrobe to feel, including shapes, textures, and patterns I like:
https://www.pinterest.com/jhta.....ood-board/

The other is dissecting particular outfits I like:
https://www.pinterest.com/jhta.....fit-board/

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Oops, I see I replied too soon and the discussion about Pinterest/how to figure out your style continues. I'll try not to mix up who's saying what as I flip back and forth.
Jenni NZ, that process makes a lot of sense to me. Analyzing is something I'm good at and that I can enjoy.
Jenn, when I've tried to use Pinterest (for other things), I've gotten frustrated that things just seem to go in circles. It's nearly impossible (for me anyway) to figure out where something started, or sometimes even when it started. What do you do on Pinterest that is fun? The process that Lisa P describes just sounds like an awful slog and, again, why look at other people when I've got stuff I know I liked well enough to buy? It's quite possible that I might like something because of how it plays with the features of the person wearing it. There was a post a week ago here by someone with red hair, where it was obvious that it worked really well with the green / blue (maybe Eliza J) dress she had on. But it isn't always that clear, especially if I'm trying to pick out what is immediately appealing before my eyes glaze over. Am I doing it wrong, or are we just different people who enjoy different things?
"Not anlife time commitment". Well, no, it isn't a commitment, but I'd like to think I have some continuity to me. I know there are things I liked as a child that I like now, and personality traits that are still with me, even though they may have matured or mellowed.
Funnily enough, I was thinking that some time in the future when I wasn't posting so much I might write something about "the fish that got away" about a couple items I miss and asknif others had similar items.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Jenn, I see we were writing at the same time. I'll go check those out.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Ok, from one of those two threads, I gather that people use Pinterest in three ways: to follow people they've already identified as someone who's style they like (I can do that here); to search for something specific; to keep track of things they find elsewhere. Jenn, in that thread you describe a process that I think leads to the images Runcarla posted in that thread. It looks like a nightmare to me. If that is what you meant by fun, then we clearly enjoy different things. I appreciate you suggesting to me the thing that worked for you, and I certainly don't want everyone's in the world to be the same. I'm going to look at your other thread now, but am already getting the idea that Pinterest might not be for me.

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