Deborah, interesting. Do I want to be grown up? I'm not sure I'm going 'organic" per se, but I want less fuss. Not stripped down minimal either, because it's those little details like drape and asymmetry that make such a difference. Maybe I'm looking to be the RATE version of your current style! Or am I that already? I do appreciate your input!

Just getting to YLF today now - and have enjoyed all the comments on your post , Una. So many thoughtful and articulate women here. Gaylene and Gryffin always write what's in my head, and I like what each of them have written here. I'm still almost reeling at that fantastic insight about no longer needing the extra embellishments now that you can bring your own wisdom and experience naturally into your look. I need to take heed of that myself and try to find my natural, mature, authentic look instead of grasping at everything I see that's shiny and pretty.

Anyways - I'm in awe of you, as always ...you have a good handle on yourself and what you want, and you set a great example. The way you've described what you want and how your closet now works makes a lot of sense to me. Go for it.

That's what I'm pondering, Lisa! I'm lucky to have all of you on this journey. What do you think - are (alleged) wisdom and experience equal to fab accessories to our overall look?

If you've seen the recent In Style, Eva Longoria is featured and she is wearing little make-up and lovely elegant clothes instead of her usual starlet makeup and skin-tight glam. She looks "mature", yes, but also UNBELIEVABLY STUNNING. I don't particularly like her, never found her to be more than conventionally pretty - and I didn't recognize her in this incarnation.

I probably didnt express myself properly...it's early morning and no coffee yet. By organic I mean what comes naturally. Less thought and angst but that innate sense of knowing what works for you:). And with the details, they also can be achieved without fuss and not as much thought as they used to. And by grown up I mean that you are at peace with just being you and with that come a level of consistency (not boring) to your style. You like a trend, you incorporate it, if you don't like it you don't! You are motivated more from the inside than the outside. Sorry I'm not so good at the analysis stuff:(

And I shouldn't have used the word minimal, what I really mean is cohesive...ok coffee time x

On my phone Una but had to chime in and say I totally get this! Stopping colouring my hair started a change in me in terms of self acceptance which in turn led me to a more authentic style. Remember my days of retro early in YLF days? I look at those outfits now and they seem almost costume-y now. I don't regret that phase as experimentation is how I find my way. But how I'm dressing now seems genuine and certainly less fussy and more comfortable - both emotionally and physically.

I think of this for you as less of a shift and more of self discovery leading to refining your style. Looking forward to seeing where it takes you

Una, yes, I think age, knowledge and wisdom "ideally" trump the accessories and tricky things we add to our look to make it "us". But.....as with all things. that's easier said than done. A blog I read daily called Keep It Chic, which is written by Preston Davis - a former Vogue editor and stylist - is all about that more natural, (albeit WASPY),classic look. Yesterday she made a comment about how less (or even no) makeup is now looking sexier to her -and of course I panicked because I know it to be true, but I'm the biggest makeup (bad word) going. I love a done-up eye. Anyways, this got me to thinking maybe I can drop the artifice, the jewellery, the makeup ,and see where it takes me. Then I slapped myself across the face, took another slug of coffee, and laughed.

Lisa, I've never been big on makeup so this just sold me on my lack of effort. I mean look at her... Obviously there is some makeup effort going on but nothing like her usual. I would never have recognized her.

What a wonderful thread! Ok, well I will throw in a few random thoughts because all the deep global stuff has been said beautifully upthread.

Equipment shirts - I am in a not in the mood to fuss with non-washable tops right now. But, I will note one silk top (Uniqlo) was accidentally washed and dried in the machine and came out fine. I am just afraid to try with the couple of more expensive tops I have.

Salt and pepper hair - makes a statement anyway you look at it. I actually feel more free to try trendy looks knowing I have pretty much cancelled out mutton as lamb from the get go. But that does not mean I want to all the time or even frequently. My hair says I go my own way enough already.
On the other hand, although your hair is quite sleek, there is something relatively unruly about grey hair and might be drawing you to sleeker lines. Your hair is bling enough!

I'm nodding at Shevia's comment that salt and pepper, gray, or silver hair on an older woman does become a statement-making accessory especially when the clothes and haircut are current. I also think it's likely that gray hair makes it easier to wear trends--a gray-haired woman with an edgy cut wearing leather leggings gets a different ticket than a older woman with colored hair and full makeup wearing the same outfit.

ETA: Una, those pictures of Eva Longoria are stunning. I'm sure she still has has a makeup artist devote quite a bit of time to her, but the end result looks so much more human than her previous photographs.

Oh I love the idea of hair as bling... Must reprogram that into my brain.

Geez , you're right about Eva Longoria. But I see it as just a more sophisticated look- more high-fashion and less Miss America. What's interesting also is the tonal and neutral clothing , letting the fabric and cut speak for themselves. Sigh- .

Well, this is all fascinating. I guess that coping with change--of any kind, at any time of life--brings revelations. Your hair has been such a seismic shift, it must be interesting to see what's fallen away and what remains standing of your personal style. (As Colette wrote, "And what better massage than an earthquake?") Your clarity, as always, is remarkable. You really see what you want, what you would like to try, and what you can happily discard. The brilliant label of "faux structure" is one I'm sure we will all now be applying to that category of lifesavers (the cotton knit blazer, the buttery leather jacket, the dress like a long t-shirt with clever seams and zippers) from the magic zone between restrictive tailored clothing and a wardrobe of sweatpants. I share your desire for simplicity, ease, and authenticity, and I look forward to seeing how you take vibrant colors into rough, edgy places and find what works comfortably for you and your new pewter hair.

RA(so)TE? Rough around (some of) the edges?

I don't know you that well, but a lot of what you're expressing as dissatisfaction seems to be actually be satisfaction with where your style is at. You mention having easy formulas, buying for a known style template, and indulging in some wildcards to keep things fresh. Your post on the high-low jeans hemming definitely speaks to someone who still enjoys some exploring, so you're not stagnating either.

The one place where you seem to be less happy is your work wardrobe. Whereas everywhere else, you've said you're good with where you're at, when you described your work wardrobe, you used the phrase "resigned myself." So maybe you can find a way to keep your no-fuss work formulas, but work just one or two pieces of your casual style into the mix (and maybe that's just your hair, if you start thinking of it that way)? I'm imagining a crisp sheet of paper with one corner torn off. Rough around one of the edges for work?

I love the 5 key ingredients idea! If you're in a place where you can say "I don't really feel like expermenting" - that's the perfect place to be for being selective and finding the best stuff.

For me, the 5-ingredient plan doesn't completely work, because I like too much stuff, and am still a bit too impulsive when I shop.

Good luck, and keep wearing the studded pink shoes!

Una that is so perfectly sensible. People do that all the time. It can be so difficult to reconcile our work environment with our person one. Even the personal ones are hard. I would not wear to NYC what I mostly wear Round our little agricultural town. The capsule premise has been really great for me. And it sounds as if that is what you are doing : a work one and a RATE , personal one. Your hair and BEUTIFUL exotic look adds SO much without even trying. XXXXXXXX

Una - one more thought. Caro recommended a book to me that I have enjoyed very much, "10 Steps to Fashion Freedom" by Malcolm Levene. As he says the book is less abouat fashion and more about figuring out who you are, what you love, and how you want to express that through your wardrobe. One of the many resonant ideas he explored was the power of good design and fabulous fabrics. He feels that good design has nothing superfluous. No bells and whistles but is about the rightness of every element. He was insistent that good design exists at all price points but often more expensive clothing has better tailoring and better fabrics. He also discussed how great design and excellent fabric makes a piece more timeless. I got the same sense when you talked about moving away from extraneous embellishments and favoring a cleaner line that you were actually evolving in this way. Excellent design, fabric, fit - it does not require distraction or embellishment. It's the natural outcome of buy better (which I don't necessarily mean more expensive, but better quality at any pricepoint). Also the feel of clothing that fits and flatters - well it makes us carry ourselves differently. Wearing something that fits perfectly, feels wonderful on, and flatters just lets you forget about the clothing and be you, because you are totally comfortable and those clothes become part of your "skin." Sorry for the ramble and I'm not remotely doing justice to the book - but it's a lot of verbiage to say I think you'd find the read and exercises interesting!

Gryffin, thanks for that recommendation! Where IS Caro? I miss her. Those are great points. An H&M just opened here, and I ventured in but did not see anything that felt worth bringing home as compared to what I have. I think maybe shopping and walking away with nothing is as or more productive sometimes than buying - because it applies a skill I haven't learned enough, the art of leaving things behind.

Isabel, I'm blushing - you're highly overestimating me, but thank you for your kind words.

You all have given me so much wisdom and food for thought. I am going to revisit this thread many times and should print it to hang in my closet. I have been doing some organizing and purging (or setting aside certain precious items like Equipment shirts) to see what's left. I'm going to go back and revisit the remaining items with all of this knowledge in mind and the questions you've raised,

Thank you!

WOW. Great thread. Only getting to it now.

Una, you have finally reached a point where you are focused - and at peace - with what you want to wear, and how you want to present yourself both professionally and in your leisure time. WELL DONE. This is an amazing accomplishment - and an enviably position to be in with your style. For years - here on YLF - you have lamented that you can't wear the things you truly want to wear because of age, lifestyle, your profession ..... and the list goes on. For years you have put out fires instead of getting to the heart of your true style needs. NOW, you are there. It's as if your greying hair has freed you, and given you an enormous sense of style clarity. I am very proud of you. And you have never looked better on YLF than you do right now. *applause*

My hat off to Gaylene and Gryffin for their incredible eloquence. My hat off to Jaime for her insights about wearing the trendiest stuff with ultra modern salt and pepper hair. And my hat off to Debs for using the word "grown-up", which I think was a good word despite the fact that you rebelled against it, Una. I agree with Debs. You can be as funky, spunky and avant-garde as you like in a grown-up way. It's kind of what Jaime was trying to say too.

I have no deep insights regarding your post Una, only that what you said resonates with where I am right now too, evolutionarily speaking. Probably why I didn't really find much appealing at NAS this year. I don't have any wardrobe holes identified, but feel the need to refine what I have. I find that I am increasingly drawn to structure and simplicity...

Great reading here So much wisdom.

I am late to the thread but if you have found a consistency of style, instead of 6 $70 additions, maybe one $400 addition that is perfection might make your heart sing. It sounds like you need work/off duty/gear clothing and each of these capsules may be able to be well curated and simple...

Yes I think grey hair does change the colours that suit, I think grey clothing won't work as well as it did with black hair. I think you would really suit some of the moody colours; stormy sea green, rich red wine, and black and white print....I have attached some pics, more of the colours than of the styles.

This thread turned into something fabulous to read! Lots of great insight and thoughts. Most of what I was thinking has been covered already. I'm not fully sold on the gray hair as a catalyst for all of this; as Angie mentioned you've been headed this way for quite a while now! It's not like you've been wanting to adopt trends but haven't due to age or fear or anything like that. To me your search has always been about authenticity (mine, too).

Some thoughts, one a paragraph:

There's nothing wrong with splitting your wardrobe. I know lots of books and websites and stylists always list many "work to weekend" pieces, but your work and your weekend just don't overlap in the right way, there's too much contrast there. In addition, your work needs a certain level of conventionalism which you don't necessarily aspire to one way or another with your casual wear. AND you do loads of outdoorsy active stuff that requires actual gear. To try and reconcile all of those with shared-across-uses pieces makes no sense to me. It is what it is! To my mind, actually separating these two overarching wardrobes of yours, work and weekend, even if there are pieces that could be overlapped, is a fantastic approach. You end up with simplicity in getting dressed for both work and weekend, with the ability to "play" only if you feel like it.

I don't quite agree with the thought of you no longer experimenting. You DO experiment, you just don't necessarily bring in every single new/fringe trend and try to make it work. That's fine too.

On a semi-related note, to me it sounds like you are willing to give
most of your wardrobe time to the shopping part. Find the right pieces.
Then when getting dressed you can sort of auto-pilot but still know that
you'll end up with something fab.

I haven't been wearing my shirts much either, except for my silk button-ups! However I am starting to wear them untucked or fully tucked, instead of semi-tucked, for a cleaner line and neater, breezier look. I would be inclined to set aside your pretty silk shirts, especially if the prints/colors are favorites; you may go back to them in a year or two. Or perhaps once you have your wardrobe more sorted you'll have a better idea of where they can fit within it.

Hair is definitely an accessory (mine is my most important accessory along with my skin). When hair changes it does require a little tweaking everywhere else to feel right and balanced again.

Edgy doesn't mean black. I have 100% confidence that you can work color
in a way that feels authentic to you. You already do this

Having the major style stuff further refined will let you play with your shadow personas a bit more, if you feel like doing so.

And lastly, I think it is entirely possible to pare down the more busy style elements you previously identified with into a simpler frame. I have been working towards this myself the past few years. Minimally Maximal, as Angie has put it. "Clean Edge" is certainly something you can get to.

(As an aside, I showed my husband the Eva Longoria photos and he didn't buy into the makeup thing as presented. Said the only way to really judge the difference would be to have the same photographer, with the same setup, with the same angles, within a reasonable time frame. He also preferred the full face make up look; which I found really interesting as he doesn't really like that on me but said he liked it better on her.)