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Style help / The wardrobe balancing act

Stephanie

First - hi everyone! I just joined and am already really enjoying the forum Guess I'll dive right in...

I'm 26, live in Central Florida, and my work environment is very business casual. Honestly, I am so challenged at defining my style. So I guess that's my first cry for help - I've added photos of two outfits that I wear and feel really good in, both feel like a personal reflection of me at this time. I like looking polished at work or home and am not shy of color/texture. I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts on style words that come to mind as I'm kind of reinventing my wardrobe right now and am looking for guidance. I also included some pieces I'm drawn to currently for fall - I definitely tone down my colors to earthy tones for fall/winter.

The second part of my question is for those ladies who are also in business casual. How do you balance out your wardrobe? The majority of my outfits are crafted for work, so naturally I buy heavier in that category. My real struggle is my own mental block - I try and make everything in my wardrobe function for work AND weekend/date nights and have a hard time shopping just for one place or the other but I desperately need some casual/non boring items for weekend wear. Has anyone else dealt with this? My casual wardrobe is seriously blah, and for my normal weekend/date activities with the SO, sometimes my work stuff feels too dressed up to translate.

Thanks for any help and advice you can give. I'm looking forward to chatting with everyone!

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Dressing

31 replies

Latest reply was from DonnaF

Alassë

Veteran

Hello! It looks like you have a modern, yet feminine approach to style. You're also very pretty with a great smile.

Stephanie

Thanks for the feedback Alasse! Feminine is definitely a word that has been coming to mind for me but I think I want to mix it up with a little edge, too.

Rambling Ann

(website)

Veteran

Stephanie, I could have written what you said about imbalanced wardrobes when I worked full-time in an office. Work wear seems so much more justifiable on the household budget, no? And those kinds of clothes seem more well-made, a better value. Now my life has changed and it's all reversed- I mostly need gear things like jeans, cargos and tees but want the pretties.

Thinking capsules is what helped me the most. I actually divided my closet into the farm side and the city side to remind me to spend my budget on my real life. The nice thing is once I started thinking in capsules, it didn't take long before I started noticing nicer things that fit into the empty slots. So there's the date night capsule, the big city travel capsule, the work capsule, the lounge capsule, etc. A bit of crossover, but I'm slowly starting to get them all more or less functional for my life.

ETA: although it is sad that my most recent clothing purchases were from the feed store closeouts on Carharts but I partially filled my biggest hole with a pair of jeans and l/s flannel shirt for $30. Yay, more budget for the good stuff.

Stephanie

Thank you! I hadn't thought about capsules in this way and I love your idea to actually separate out my wardrobe into sections for the various parts of my life. I think that would make visualizing my wardrobe holes so much easier! I have been thinking a lot about trying out a capsule but really like your idea of creating several small ones so I always have something to wear for each occasion.

Alassë

Veteran

Along the lines of capsules for life segments, check out Into Mind: http://into-mind.com/2014/10/0.....buy-first/

Anonymous

For a while, I tried to make my work and weekend wardrobes align. Like you, I work in a casual office, so I *could* make this happen. Then I started paying more attention to style, and started dressing up a little more for work. Unfortunately, what this meant was that my weekend wardrobe really took a nose dive--I wasn't replenishing in enough.

For this next phase, I'm focused on buying for my weekend wardrobe---what this means is that I'm really slowing down on spending on my work capsule, and also, I'm trying out new pieces that I wouldn't normally think to try out because they aren't work-appropriate. I'm talking about jean shorts, distressed denim, yoga gear, lots of really bright colours, sneakers, that type of thing.

If you keep buying for work AND play, it sort of waters down the budget for both, and I think it would be harder to create a lot of great outfits in either. But that's just me.

ETA: I forgot to mention how cute your outfits are! I think of them as feminine, as others have said, and also a bit fun and youthful.

Sal

Veteran

Welcome!! I love your WIW, your work style is great.

I also love the pieces under consideration. You have a fresh polished modern feminine style to my eye.

Some things I find make my wardrobe more weekend/ date night oriented
- funky footwear, something with a real edge, either heeled for going out or flat for casual weekend.
- bolder jewelry

There are some great cropped jeans and pants around that would work in your climate.

I love colour too and am trying to bring more into my wardrobe.

Gwennie

This is something that I have been thinking about and working on as well. When I first started at YLF, my casual non work look was more jeans and tees and my work wardrobe was less versatile as well. I had a number of casual occasions where I needed to be dressier and work related occasions where I needed more flexibility. I've been focusing on trying to find items that are versatile and can work for possibly both business casual and casual - ponte pants and chinos, more versatile skirts and jackets and blouses and tops like utility blouses and silk or crepe tees that I can wear with jeans or skirts or dress pants. I'm trying to build a core of some of these items but am also finding that there are times I want to wear jeans and a tee, more specifically business outfits and dressy outfits that are strictly that. But I am trying to look for at least some items that have more flexibility. Like your WIW outfits and the clothes that you've shown!

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

I think dividing up the capsules (to a point) is a good idea. If you're worried about "ruining" something because you were it as casual, that's probably more of a budget/maintenance issue with the garment. I live an extremely casual life, but at the same time I will actually wear a silk/cotton blend blouse as casual because I *want* to and because I am generally careful about not doing anything too extreme that would ruin the garment. I often will bring a more casual tee along with me (or more casual shoes) if I am uncertain of the circumstances of a casual weekend event.

Stephanie

Alasse - thanks for the awesome link! I really like the idea of thinking small scale and just adding 5 core pieces that will make a big difference. My casual wardrobe is basically at 0 right now, so that's a great start!

smittie - It's great to hear from someone who has been in this same position! I'm tired of trying to make everything work in both places and don't have enough polished casual clothing to work with. I think I'm going to focus my attention there too and put work clothes on hold for awhile. I think you're absolutely right - I think I'll feel way better and more confident about my casual dressing once I give it the focus it deserves. Thanks for the kind comments!

Sally - Thanks of for the welcome! You are a woman after my own heart…love me some funky edgy shoes Thanks for the recommendations on the crops! I think I need to get out of my casual style comfort zone (skinny jeans, flats, tee or tank) and mix things up. I think crops would be great for me here in FL. Looking forward to seeing how you add color to your own wardrobe!

Gwennie - You sound so much like me! My casual wardrobe is pretty much jeans and a tee but I'm ready to add in some more polished items for versatility. I love mixing styles so I think I'll feel much better once I have some good core pieces to play with. You sound like you have a great approach - shop for all occasions independently, but still keep an eye out for pieces that work for all 3.

texstyle - No worries about getting casual pieces messy here! Except for normal wear and tear on tees and tanks, I've been lucky in avoiding major damage and staining Knock on wood. Good idea on bringing along extras - I love to mix up super casual and more polished items and it's always good to have options!

plonkee

I eventually calculated how many days I needed business casual, and how many days I needed casual. And between dress down Fridays, holidays and vacations it turned out a lot closer to 50:50 than I had realised. So I've been making an effort to buy more clothing that's just casual. I spend more money on work wear, but I'm aiming to have a similar number of pieces in work wear and casual categories (with crossovers that really work).

Aida

Veteran

You've gotten great advice already, so just wanted to share that I'm in a similar place. Many of us with very casual/lax dress codes seem to struggle with this! That said, if you're describing your work wear as proper business casual then yes you definitely are allowed to devote some of your time and funding to actual casual wear How much depends on the amount of actual time you spend there. Knowing that you're lacking in your casual wear is the first step, so that's great!

What's worked for me is, as others have suggested, to think of weekend wear as a whole separate animal than work wear even though many pieces could technically work for both. So I don't try to buy pieces that function for both needs, but if a "work" piece also happens works on the "weekend", well that's just a bonus. It was MUCH easier to get dressed casually once I decided to split them up. Now I've got enough actual casual pieces for "weekend" wear and if I ever need to smarten up well, it's easy enough to pull something from my "work" clothes.

Stephanie

pionkee - That's a great idea! I bet I'd have similar findings and sometimes actually seeing it on paper makes all the difference. I think I'm convinced…time to put my $$ towards some polished casual pieces. I'd love to add some polished tees, BF jeans and some fun shoes into the mix.

Aida - So glad to know I'm not the only one Honestly, it may very well be a comfort zone thing for me. I know what works for my business casual outfits and have a pretty good mix of clothing. Casual…well that's a whole different animal and seems scary to tackle from scratch! Maybe I've been avoiding it. I really like the suggestion of just putting my focus on casual and not worrying about everything working in both environments. Taking off the pressure to have everything be versatile will bring the fun back into it for me. Great suggestions - much thanks

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

Welcome Stephanie! I appreciated your comments on my earlier post - they were very wise.

Your outfits are great! To me, you look polished, feminine and a little classic. And you are very pretty!

I'm also from central FL (I was at the Mall at Millenia today) and also spend most of my life in business casual looks. I love getting to wear different things on the weekends, but I spend more time in my comfy clothes doing laundry than going to special places, so when I do have somewhere to go, I end up trying on 10 things to find the right combination!. I find that I do like for my business and casual to overlap. I will take casual tops and put them with dressier bottoms for work, or take jeans from the weekend and put them with dressier tops for causal Friday. I have very few items that are exclusively work or weekend. I just find that my creativity flows better that way.

If you ever want to meet up somewhere and do a little shopping, just let me know!

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

These outfits are great, and I see:
bright, pretty, modern, glam.

You've gotten some great advice. Just wanted to say welcome!

Joy

Veteran

Welcome, Stephanie. I see Feminine Modern Classic and have no additional advice to add, except to take your time and have fun. Don't buy anything unless you love it.

Bijou

Veteran

Great post - your work outfits are beautiful. I work in a casual environment and find my leather skirts (I have ones in tan and black) are good winter crossover pieces. I wear these with a blouse, coat and pumps for work and then wear with boots and knits on the weekend. I love your picks, especially the studded T strap flats.

Brooklyn

Veteran

Hi Stephanie! I like your style. To me it is modern, fun and glam. I am also guilty of spending way too much time and money on work wear and skimping on casual wear. You have already been given some great advice. I will just add a few random thoughts - this reflects where I have been going with my casual wardrobe.
Casual jackets: I find I distinguish between my work and casual jackets by fabrication. For summer/spring casual I like cotton jackets eg denim or light knit jackets. For fall/winter casual I like leather, pleather or mixed media jackets. To me this keeps the vibe casual and non-workish. My work jackets tend to be more structured and usually made of wool, viscose or a poly blend.
Tops: I think a dressier tee eg one that is made of silk or that has a lovely print works really well for dressy casual. The fact that it is a tee makes it feel like casual wear and not workwear.
Jeans: I think it is worthwhile spending on jeans. One big revelation for me is that my jeans are my most worn item. So I can justify having a few pairs - and not just of the "good enough to walk the dog in" variety.
Look forward to seeing more of your style.

ananthimathur

(website)

Hi Stephanie! Welcome to YouLookFab! I loved both the pics you have added! You look amazingly in both!

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

If I saw you across the room I'd think, she looks approachable, friendly, feminine, glam, and from a woman to woman standpoint, like a fashion girl. There is almost always something a fashion girl has on that I admire, and I don't hesitate to tell her.

I think the outfits you've shown look polished but not too serious and I like that you are not trying to look all mature.

In terms of further defining your style, are there particular looks/style directions you are yearning to try out? Because it could be fun to experiment with different styles, say, for your weekend capsule. You could photograph and document how each style felt. The ones that felt the most you, might help you come closer to developing your own style moniker. The styles that didn't feel right, might teach you just as much.

Summer

Veteran

Welcome, Stephanie! Your WIWs and inspiration pictures are lovely.

I agree that it's easiest to divide your wardrobe into activity capsules, so that you have just the right pieces for each part of your life. Once the capsules are up and running, there may be scope for overlap between them, but it's probably best to think of that as a bonus rather than an aspiration.

Kimaya Sharon

(website)

Member

For girl so many clothes are to wear in office. I think you should try some casual sweet-shirts, formal shirt with some beautiful printed scarf. I hope it's look great on you. Keep try this and also share your pics over here.

Stephanie

You ladies sure know how to make a girl feel welcome - thank you!

Sarah - A fellow Floridian! You sound a lot like me -- I do spend a lot of time in my comfy clothes around the house on weekends and in business casual at work. When I do go out, it takes me awhile to find something to wear. I really love having pieces that work for all aspects of my life, but I think I've been neglecting my polished casual weekend selection (for date night, meeting friends, etc). Time to focus! Our approach to style seems pretty similiar - I, too, love mixing up a more casual piece with something dressier or vice versa to create interesting looks.

Firecracker - thanks for the warm welcome! I like "glam" and that definitely feels appropriate when it comes to my jewelry. I like statement earrings/necklaces and sparkly things from time to time.

Joy - simple, yet wonderful advice. And I love your style words! They all feel "right" to me so I thank you for your help. I agree, I'm a recovering fast fashion impulse buyer and have been making a real effort towards getting away from that. If I don't love it and feel great in it, it doesn't stay.

Bijou - I am SO drawn to leather but have been scared to try it outside of a leather jacket. I'll have to check out your forum posts for some outfit inspiration...maybe it's time to take a step outside my fashion comfort zone

Brooklyn - Thanks! I love your idea of investing in some silk or dressier tees. I think that would be perfect for me in terms of being able to dress them up for work and then pair with jeans and casual heels on the weekend for a more polished casual look. Any recommendations? I definitely need to work on jeans. I have a great pair of ATL dark skinnies but need some more variety. I'm thinking of trying a straight leg and maybe some BF jeans.

anathimathur - Thank you! Looking forward to checking out your forum posts

CocoLion - Thanks for the confidence boost You're absolutely right, this is a good opportunity for me to try out some different things and just have fun. I'm drawn to outfits with a little edge (leather, red heels, leopard print, mixing dark and earthy tones) so maybe that's a good place to start.

Ex: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/275071489716481820/
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/275071489718676655/
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/275071489718718307/

Summer - Thanks! I think I'm going to give that approach a try. I need casual outfits for about half of the typical month, so that definitely warrants some attention.

Kimaya - All good ideas! It's easy to focus attention on office wear and forget about the fun weekend outfits. I love scarves! I don't get to wear them much in my climate, but I'm sure I could find some lightweight ones to pair with tees and jeans.

Beth Ann

Veteran

Welcome to the Forum and to the fun of WIW! There is a good dose of romantic and of modern in your style! You do a great job of balancing color and texture and creating interest without loosing outfit cohesion.
Love the white skirt!

I have a question for you, and one suggestion. First the question:
How does your climate affect your style and change your wardrobe needs?

Now the suggestion:
I found it helpful to snap a quick pick every day --- nothing fussy. Over time, I began to see patterns emerge in my outfits, and had a better sense of what was working and what wasn't. Also, my photos help me remember favorite combinations when I'm staring in the closet in the morning! Also, the more pics you post, the more the forum members will know you style. It's wonderful when someone pipes up with something like: "Why don't you try that skirt with your yellow blouse?" It's like having fashion sisters who know your closet, but can't steal your best clothes!

Stephanie

Thanks for the welcome

To answer your question -- climate is definitely a big factor. I am usually not comfortable layering with the exception of 2.5 months out of the year. No need for more than 1-3 jackets. I'm also somewhat limited in fabrication to cotton, rayon and linen, but can do poly if the style is loose/flowy. The lack of layering can sometimes make casual dressing feel very blah and unfinished for me, but that's better than sweating. Color choice is also dictated by climate...I love bold bright colors in S/S and more muted earthy tones (burgundy, olive, cream/ivory, light heather grey) in the F/W. Simply put, I need 80% s/s appropriate clothing in light fabrics, with a few pieces at either extreme to cover me during extra hot and chillier months.

I agree about the outifts. I think I'll do that as I'm trying to discover a casual polished weekend style that fits for me. I'm basically starting from scratch there and as a visual learner I think photos will help a lot! Thanks for your great input - I look forward to seeing you around the forum.

Alassë

Veteran

In warm weather (when you can't layer), belts, chunky or pendant necklaces, very light scarves, and hats are good options. Also color blocking, like an acid green top with a navy skirt.

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

Hello and welcome, Stephanie! You've been such a great voice around the forum already, I can't wait to see more of your style.

I have the same fabrication limits as you do (no poly) and I'd encourage you to add silk to your list. I've been enjoying the silk blouses I purchased for this fall, in both warm and cooler weather.

If you're a visual learner, have you considered making a Pinterest board of casual looks you admire? It might serve as a guide for which work pieces can cross over and what items you need to add to make things work.

Stephanie

Thank you Jenn! I may be going comment crazy - I love talking style and this forum is such a great find

I think I'm going to take your advice on the silk. That will certainly fit into my polished casual guidelines and I'll probably be able to convert pieces between business/weekend easily. Plus, I've never owned anything silk so it's something new and fun to try! Do you have any favorite brands for silk tops?

I love pinterest! I took a closer look at my F/W board last night and got some ideas, like adding some red shoes into the mix. Olive + black and stripes and leopard are some common themes as well, so I'm going to try to find some versatile casual pieces in those patterns for a starting point.

Maneera

(website)

Veteran

Welcome Stephanie!

I think I missed this thread earlier. I've read your comments on other threads and am glad I found this one to see your style. You look fabulous! And I can see you have a great sense of style; just like your wise and well-thought advice on other threads

I love that your work wear is polished and feminine, yet quite approachable and very fashion forward. You're extremely pretty and wear both the skirt ensembles fabulously!

For casual wear, I think you've got the figure to wear denim shorts paired with tanks, cropped jeans and bright knits and simple dresses.

When I joined YLF, I sucked at casual dressing....it got better with time. One piece that worked wonders for me was a cropped denim vest. I add it to dressier pieces in my wardrobe to dress them down for weekends - always works! Also - shoes. Casual sandals and slip on sneakers, paired with a cropped denim vest, could turn your office wear into casual wear.

I hope that helps!

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