Style Check-in - YouLookFab Forum

I can't believe we are almost 7 weeks into the new year... it has been a hectic start and I certainly haven't been posting much on the forum. I find that I am in a strange place with respect to my clothing.

Working back in the real world has left me a tad confused. As I have mentioned before, the dress code is business casual, except for Fridays, which are smart casual. I am battling to decide where I want to be style wise in this new world. In the little spare time I have had to wander the shops, I have not found much that I really love. I feel like the clothes that I pin, the clothes I see on here that I like... it is like they don't exist in the stores I go to. And we are really not that good at the online shopping thing here in SA, yet. And the stuff I do start looking at, it is all sort classic, conservative stuff that I am surprised to find myself looking at.

Added to that, I am really not feeling great about myself. I have put on much more poundage that I wish to admit. I thought today as was browsing the rails about how my size determines my style and that doesn't make me happy.

I have a few goals for the next few months aside from trying to find my style groove again. The main goal is that I really want to look like like quality. I have been paying attention to the quality of clothing and their overall effect on how people look. Something I think I lack a bit. I had an epiphany about how tatty my knits look. They pill so quickly which makes them look cheap.

Thanks for listening to my ramblings!

12 years ago

Anonymous

Sorry you're going through all that. It seems so unfair that, in addition to all the other stress/uncertainty that goes along with getting situated in a new job, there are also wardrobe issues to think about. Hopefully you'll find your footing soon! It certainly sounds like you're on the right track in terms of thinking about stuff and getting into the right place mentally.

I also sympathize on how frustrating it can be to shop when you've gained a little weight. I'm, ahem, extremely familiar with that feeling and it sucks, even if you know intellectually that dressing for the body you have now is what makes sense.

And I also keep meaning to get a little pickier about quality. I keep ending up with knits that pill quickly too and there's got to be a good way to avoid that. Other than just buying wovens, because I don't want to just buy wovens.

Anyway, I'm kind of rambling back, but just wanted you to know that I sympathize on all points here! And I hope the job's going well!

rabbit

Veteran

It's hard going through transitions and being in a new environment where you want to be 'you' but also to fit in, and who 'you' are may be changing too. Paired with times when your body is frustrating you, it becomes doubly difficult for me at least. It might be that a few classic conservative pieces that are high quality will make you feel more grounded in basics and then you can work a style that expresses your personality around them.

The quality issue and knits is one I struggle with to, because I really like the shapes of knits (and the price) and don't like ironing my clothes. I buy at clearance/off-price retail stores, and try to check the 'compare at' prices or original tags if I can't visually and by feel or label/brand tell fabric quality -- I'll always go for the item that is marked down 70-90% and is now in my price range in hopes that the fabric quality will be higher. I tend to donate them as soon as there are visible pills if I can't shave them off (sometimes dry cleaners also comb the surface on a sweater and refresh it). I also wash them carefully and only when needed, but if I love it, it still gets worn out quickly.

kkards

Hil, hope the new job is going well. Yes, business casual can be confusing. I find in my office the range of what worn is large and very arbitrary, changing by department and age. Maybe the way to start is with some conservative pieces mixed with some trendier ones. Funky shoes with a pair of basic work trousers,that sort of thing. IMO shoes are always a great place to start, and less dependent on weight fluctuations.

Lyn D.

Hang in there Hil!
You always look great in your WIWs, and with the fluid and oversized trend why not buy a great-quality item now and enjoy the mood-lift it brings?

Suz

(website)

Hil, you always look terrific in your photos. But I do understand how body changes, job changes, and seasonal shifts can make you feel rotten and ill at ease with your clothes. It's tough. I agree with Lyn -- if you can find some great oversize pieces now with nice drape, they will accommodate shifts downward and make you feel great right this minute. I think your basic silhouette of the pencil skirt with a loose top is fantastic for your work requirements and if you need some structure now and again, maybe consider adding a topper or two for winter?

Caro in Oz

Sympathies Hil

I was going to suggest stretchy straight skirts & loose tops & knitwear too they are a great uniform for you imo. Really you don't need much & the items can be fairly conservative - just amp them up with great shoes & bag & your fab haircut.

Deborah

Hil be encouraged that you always look so fab in your WIW posts. Lifestyle changes can throw a bit of a spanner in the works stylewise. I remember going through a bit of this when I relocated and started a new job. You will find your way. IMVHO I think it's key to make sure you are being 'you'. How do you want to present? What do you want to look like? And remember it can take time to get to where you would like to be. I sometimes think I have two style personas. One for my personal life and one for my work life and my goal over the past say 6 months or so has been to meld the two. So like Caro said above, my work outfits tend to me a bit more on the conservative side but I try to add more of 'me' by way of shoes, hair and accessories. I think you have already laid down the foundation of your style and it's just a matter of developing it. And as as far as finding the clothing you like, follow Angie's mantra of leaving not retail stone unturned. Some of the things I find come from places you would never expect

I'm sorry Hil: that's a lot of challenges to deal with. But I agree with everyone else: your WIW posts are always fab!

Knits are definitely trickier to keep looking nice/polished than wovens. I've had some that have last ages without any problems and others that get worn out very quickly. I can't find any patterns in fabric content/manufacturer/price point either, so it's a mystery to me!

Hil

Thank you all so much for your kind, encouraging, wise and sympathetic words. They mean so much! It's good to know I'm not alone in some of my frustrations!

Debra

Hi Hill, I can fully sympathize with how you are feeling. I'm another 'apple' who only has to smell food to find it adds kilo's and this really does affect how I feel in clothes and what I can and can't wear. Christmas and a holiday did not help
You have a great eye for style and I love the outfits you post, I think the pencil skirts and fluid tops are a great silhouette for you.

unfrumped

Just chiming in to say hang in there and dont sell yourself short. You have good instincts to aim for quality pieces that work for you. That is more important than tons of variety, I feel.

I sympathize about having items in your mind or photos and then not being able to find what you want. I have gotten some good things online but I much prefer to go try on IRL where I can see the sizes and quality.
The style winds do seem to be in your favor though with stretchy tube and pencil skirts and flowy fluid tops, and lots of knits, still going very strong.

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