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Starting work outside the home again - would love to hear your wisdom

anne

Veteran

This month I started outside work again after a 6 year gap. It is only part time, and no more than 4 1/2 hours a day, but I am finding it quite an adjustment. I am enjoying the work but would love to hear from you about tips on how to cope!!

I am getting home absolutely ravenous and very tired. Today I only worked 3 hours, then did the grocery shop and arrived home to eat 2 rounds of sandwiches and then a bowl of weetbix (ie equivalent to 2 lunches and a breakfast!). I don't think there has been a single day when I haven't napped in the afternoon ( though to be honest, I was already napping most afternoons - but the tiredness is more intense)

I haven't managed to do much in the way of exercise - a little swimming, one "run" with the kids, At this point contemplating getting up at 5:30 to get to a class or going in the evening is a bit much to ask, though things may be easier after this week as the kids will be back at school ( though then all the activities start too)

I am thinking of buying a slow cooker as one way of coping, and maybe seeing if I can have a snack at work.

I'd love to hear your input, and if you have any questions, I'll be around for the next few hours, but am taking Sundays (and Wednesdays) off the internet so otherwise will get back to you on Monday!

Thanks in advance!

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25 replies

Latest reply was from Ornella

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

I think it's just the time/mind shift of working that is making you tired and hungry - and it sounds like your day is pretty full when you aren't working!

Do you ever try having a filling meal before you go and then follow up with maybe a smaller snack after you get home? Also, sometimes when I am thirsty after work, I feel quite hungry too!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

This is normal if you ask me! Your life is hectic. Work and 3 kids - not easy.

You need to become "work fit" again if you know what I mean. You'll soon get into a routine and things will feel better. And making sure that you eat foods that give you energy instead of sap your energy might be worth looking into. As we get older, our body needs different types of fuel.

As for the exercise, don't expect too much from your body. Exercise can be energizing for sure - but it can also be depleting. Working out for shorter periods of time could help. The slow cooker is a GREAT idea. Have many friends who go that route during the week.

anne

Veteran

Lyn, I mostly have a large breakfast. I get a chance for a cup of tea 45 mins into the shift, and could eat then but find it hard to eat much more at that point. Then there is 31/2 hours with no break. I tried bringing my lunch to eat on the drive home one day.

Angie I think I miss all the cups of tea I am used to throughout the day!

I think you are right about getting "work fit". And do you have any suggestions of food that "give you energy?". Love to hear them!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

You might need more caffeine you know, Anne. I NEED caffeinated tea during the day - do not drink coffee. Very good point!

Most people derive great energy levels from extra protein. Can you snack on cheese and nuts at work? Sounds like your large brekkie works for you - is it protein rich? Large brekkies do not work for me - and neither does a protein brekkie. My body feels ill and slows down actually. I must eat a small brekkie and it has to be carb rich. Then I like a jolly fab lunch! And a great dinner. I feel robbed of life if dinner isn't fab. I also snack throughout the day. This is contrary to how most people eat and fuel up - but it works for me.

Greg on the other hand needs a larger protein rich brekkie. Larger meals throughout the day and far fewer snacks. He is also a huge teapot like me. Neither of us are big water drinkers - perhaps 2 or 3 glasses a day.

So Anne, we are all different! It's about finding that food and beverage sweet spot - and exercise sweet spot in your case. Don't know if I helped at all

I wish you the very best though! xo

marianna

Veteran

I agree that it's a time/mind shift adjustment. I just started working a Monday-Friday 9-5 job after working a retail schedule for years... and it has taken me 3 weeks to really get in the swing of things. It just takes time... it's a new routine to adjust to. It will get easier and become more natural soon.

Congrats on the job!

rachylou

Veteran

Out of curiosity, what would you have done with the 3 hours when you weren't working?

It takes something like 2 months to form a habit or so I've read. So, I imagine setting a routine and keeping to it would help a lot. The tiredness should pass once the habit/routine is set.

RoseandJoan

Veteran

Are you working five days a week for up to 4.5 hrs a day Anne?

With regards to the hunger I wonder if this is an instance on needing to keep your blood sugar levels more constant Anne, could you try taking a low GI snack to work for example raw carrots, peppers and hummus? http://www.the-gi-diet.org/lowgifoods/

Also what is the culture at work, is keeping a flask of tea by your desk acceptable? Are you able to keep a snack box in your desk drawer?

With regards to exercise, on the days I work (2 days/ 8 hrs) I schedule my exercise for a shorter period at a higher intensity (Zumba Rush takes 20 mins or I run two miles as quickly as possible). On non work days I schedule rest days were I do not exercise but try to catch up with house work and two longer workouts over the course of the week.

I find my work mentally exhausting so the girls do not have a bath after I have worked, I read them a shorter bedtime story and the meals are fast and easy; these trade offs ensure I allow myself some decompression time too.

Sending you a hug, I know this will get easier.

Ariadne

Veteran

I just started working outside the home as well--2 days a week for 7.5 hours (but with my commute I'm gone for 11 hours total), like RoseAndJoan. And, wow, I'm exhausted! The things I used to do at home on those 2 days are compressed into the rest of the week, and we're not using childcare so DH and I are shift-switching and someone is working every day of the week. I'm still figuring out how to fit exercise and other things in to this new schedule.

The slow cooker is a life saver. I've been figuring out meals that I like that can be prepped, dumped into a Ziploc, frozen, and then pulled out and dumped directly into the slow cooker in the morning for that night's dinner. I can prep a month's worth of main dishes that way in about 3-4 hours. I've found some good recipes (lots of slow cooker recipes are NOT good IMHO!), so let me know if you want them.

Freckles

Veteran

I found that the slow cooker recipes I tried except for one were bland. I'd take Adriane up on her offer of recipes. I always found in the summer I went for simple meals. Something like a bbq protein (steak, hamburgers, chicken legs, salmon) worked when ds was small along with a salad or cut up raw veggies and a carb like a roll, artisan bread, corn on the cob, potato salad. A beautiful summer fruit for dessert and a glass of milk. When ds was young he liked plain cooking and was always starving so if I stuck with that life was simpler. I also found using the bbq sure saved on clean up as there weren't a lot of pots and pans.
Toting a lunch sounds like a great idea and how about adding a flask of tea? Iced tea might work if the thermos you have doesn't keep it warm enough for you.

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

You know what, if you guys are in to Pulled Pork, I have a great simple (college kid simple) recipe for slow cooker pulled pork that is SO GOOD even my mom makes me make it when she comes over!!!!

I find it hard to eat soon after I've eaten too Eating on the way home is a good idea, as long as it's drive-friendly! I also chew gum to tide me over sometimes.

bj1111

Veteran

Wow...quite a lot on your plate. Exercise would be great but now with your limited time, maybe 10-15 minute chunks would work during breaks. Also your body and time/energy clock need a bit of a reset with new intensity and activity.

A handful of almonds or walnuts and some carrot sticks or chunks in a ziplok stuffed in my pocket or desk drawer helps with the cravings. A few nuts and sticks every hour keeps my blood sugar constant and avoids evening binging when i get home.

I'm sure it will stabilize in a bit.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

What Angie said - we are all so different when it comes to the food that gives us the energy we need. Rather than trying to "do everything" at once I'd suggest start with simple meals - cook some protein like a chicken that you can have cold the next day in a salad as well. Or make a double size curry & freeze half of it.

Have you tried a restorative yoga class? I find them great when I'm feeling too tired for exercise (don't let the title fool you, you still work but some how come out feeling energised rather than depleted).

Isis

Veteran

Can your husband take over cooking one or two nights a week? (or more? my husband and I work full time and we alternate cooking weeks....)

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

Oh, my dad does all the cooking at our house; I never really thought that moms cook when I grew up - Isis has a great suggestion!

We had Campbell's Soup and Hot Dogs a ton when I was a kid; but my dad is very very good at cooking now!

MNsara

Veteran

Yes,, the initial exhaustion will improve with time - as you acclimate to the hours and as you get more comfortable with your work (I presume the first weeks of a new job you're learning, getting familiar, and not much comes automatically yet).

Lighten up on any intense exercise for another week or so, and as you acclimate, you can exercise more.

Be careful of the napping habit - your body gets to expect that downtime and starts to slump in anticipation. If you don't mind napping, or are a poor sleeper at night and need it, go for it. But if you don't like the time it uses up, then set a timer and only give it 20 minutes, or wean yourself off naps.

For hunger, try eating a protein rich/low carb snack as you drive home - maybe with a travel mug of tea. I pack a snack of dried apricots (3-4 of them) and some roasted (not salted) almonds, A small amount seriously tides me over until real meals.

A crockpot can be your best friend - sort of like someone else is making supper for you. I have a few wonderful recipes and use it probably once a week: Indonesian Chicken, Kahlua pig (smoky pork poast), Basic balsamic (but wonderful) beef roast, taco meat (either chicken or beef or pork), vegetable soup, etc. (We eat rather paleo, so mostly meat recipes). Only the soup has much preliminary work involved - chopping all the veggies and sauteing before putting in crockpot.

Also, cook double batches of something on the weekend, so one weeknight dinner can be 'reruns'

I clearly remember beginning full time work after college - when I was a young energetic 22-yo - and coming home every day for SIX WEEKS and napping 1-2 hours. I was stymied that I needed to do this, but it finally passed

Deborah

Veteran

Anne good advice all round. I find going back to work exhausting! Not only are you adding one more thing to your already busy lifestyle, you are being mentally challenged as you learn your new job and that is tiring also. I must eat breakfast and I have cereal each morning. Lunch has to be protein based or I feel sick and my energy levels plummet. Low GI snacks are brilliant. Perhaps you could have an apple on your break? Perhaps you could take your lunch and when you finish work take 15 mins in the break room to eat in a relaxed manner and have a cuppa before you head home?

anne

Veteran

So much wisdom here - I appreciate everyone's responses ( which I did cheat and have a look at yesterday - I needed to log on to organize babysitting and couldn't resist peeking!)

Thanks to all who reassured me that it is normal to feel this way - I do know this, but still am interested in your strategies!! And you give me hope that the tiredness etc will improve

Angie - good point with the tea. I don't keep count, but I would normally (at home) have at least 8 cups of tea a day!! I am not sure about protein brekkies. I have always had a lot of carbs for breakfast - weetbix or porridge, though sometimes I manage an egg on toast which perhaps I should try. I don't like nuts, but could manage some cheese I think! As for eating through the day I realise that I eat a lot while I prepare dinner! If I come home having not prepared it I am so hungry, whereas usually I can get by on not too big portions.

Marianna - are you enjoying your new job? My new job involves quite a lot of standing - which I am guessing retail does too. Are you getting to sit down more now?

Rachylou - since those particulary hours were on a saturday I would probably have slept in a little, done some housework, done some exercise if I was being energetic, and caught up on YLF. Most school term Sats include some transporting the kids to activities too.

Jules - the most I have done so far is 4 shifts a week and I intend to not do more than 5. I am casual so it just depends on the roster. I can say no, and am working on giving them my general availablity (probably no more than 3 morning and 2 afternoons and I am working out which afternoons I can do, based on kids activities)

Good point re low GI. I don't like peppers or carrots but I adore hummus!! I am a bit annoyed that I didn't cook up a huge batch of it while lemons were in season. \

At certain points in the work time (when I am not in public view) - I think maybe I could have some tea. The work pace has been so frantic it has been hard to take a break.
Thanks for sharing your exercise. meals and housework schedule. I am learning from you!

Ariadne - that DOES sound exhausting!! 11 hour days. And your children are much younger and more demanding that mine (9, 7 and 5 and about to all be in full time school for the first time) I hope you are enjoying that it is your dream job.
I would LOVE to read recipes!!! Liked the hint about freezing too. I have a freezer too, so I could do that. (I do freeze things already, but only already cooked stews etc which take too long to heat up for after a work day)

Freckles - BBQ might be a good idea! (esp since it is summer here) . We do eat a lot of cold meat and salads too, which is handy

Lyn - I want the recipe!! I have never even tasted pulled pork! I am picking up a slow cooker tomorrow from someone who is selling it since she is moving country

BI - thanks!! I don't think I can exercise during work breaks at this point but if I work full days I probably can. And yes, need to work on blood sugar stabilization.

Caro - thanks!! And I did in fact cook 2 kilos of chicken breasts last night for that exact purpose. I have done a little yoga in body balance classes which my gym offers - and yes they aren't as tiring.

Isis and Lyn - DH probably could take over some meal provision, but I invisage it would probably involve him getting take away ( he is always looking for reasons to get more take away in our diet He has been very supportive of my return to work
and has been very helpful in cutting down on my childcare costs by starting work later etc, but I can't rely on him too much after this week, because he will be really busy at work ( he is doing 2 people's job). He does do my DD2's reading homework with her most nights while I prepare tea and I appreciate this so much, as she is somewhat resistant.

Sara - I like the suggestion of dried apricots and I love the sound of your recipes. Please share!! And I think I'll take up your suggestion to set an alarm for my naps. I think the napping came about because when the kids were small I "napped when they napped" and because I often don't get enough sleep at night. I am already a big "rerun" cook so will be keeping that up for sure!

Deborah - thanks for your suggestions. I have had to get home quickly after work during the school hols, but could possibly eat in the lunch room from next week. I know this sounds terrible, but I don't eat apples!! If I am organized I can do protein rich lunches but if not I tend to default to carbs!

Inge

(website)

Hang in there, Anne, I also think it's a matter of getting used to your new schedule and agree that a new job - with lots of new stuff to learn and new things to take in - can be physically and mentally exhausting.

On the job snack ideas: sometimes just a hard-boiled egg can tide you over for quite a bit too. If you don't like nuts perhaps you could try a handful of (roasted) pumpkin seeds (also a good source of protein). Or Greek yogurt sprinkled with berries.

Regarding the freezer meals: have you tried taken them out of the freezer before work (or even the night before) and letting them thaw in the refrigerator? That way it will take less time to heat up for dinner.

anne

Veteran

Thanks Inge. I do like hard boiled eggs for snacks (and we have our own chickens, so plenty of eggs) I'll boil some up tomorrow morning!

Oh and yes defrosting them would take less time. It is just that out microwave takes quite awhile to heat up enough food for a family of five even if is is not frozen.

And can I just vent a bit here. I am SO stressed about finding people to babysit the kids this week. I shouldn't be, but I have some anxiety about ringing people up! Most of the time I have had either family looking after them or a lovely responsible teenager - who isn't available this week. An older lady from church is helping me out one day - she was on email so that was ok to organise. Another lady seems to have changed her email address,. DH says "just ring her" but I just so hate ringing. And I feel a bit nervous.; These lovely older church people will happily babysit for free if I needed to go out at night (I know, it is such a blessing) but I feel like taking advantage if I ask them to do it while I am earning! And yet it is awkward to offer to pay. I have just asked this second lady on Facebook, but I don't think she checks it often. And now I have just slipped into the a "bit too late to ring" time zone.

It is only a problem for this week, as kids will be back at school next week and I am hoping to organise for them to use an after school care that is situated in the same building my DH works in. (Haven't made that phone call yet, but that is less nerve wracking)

Glory

Veteran

I think it will take some time to sort this and become what Angie called "work fit". I rely heavily on my slow cooker and some menu planning which I try to do on Sunday nights. I try to do the slow cooker on nights when I know I will be slammed with kids activities the moment I come home from work. Give yourself some time to adjust and definatey consider the snack at work.

anne

Veteran

Thanks Glory
And just a little update. DH has come home, seen how worried I was and is sending some texts asking people right now! Lovely Man

Anonymous

Almost 4 years ago, I went back to work after being a SAHM for many years. My saving grace was that my youngest DD was starting middle school and my commute to work was less than 15 minutes. The biggest challenge I faced was getting my three DDs to understand that our meals were going to be a lot simpler and that they were going to have to help with errands and housework. I either use the slow cooker or prepare quick meals that take less than an hour from start to finish. I'm lucky that my office recently relocated, and I am now even closer to home. I go home for lunch, and the commute takes about 10 minutes max. During my lunch break, I feed the cats, start the slow cooker (if using it for that day), start a load of laundry if I want, and eat lunch. Sometimes I opt not to go home at all but instead swing by the supermarket, bank or pharmacy, which are all very close to my office.

ManidipaM

Veteran

Anne, you've have great advice already, and I agree with everyone who's said it takes time to adjust to the change --- any change, no matter what else you have on your plate or don't, what your age, etc.

I notice also that you're on your feet through most of your shifts? That sounds like a BIG change to me --- not only in terms of energy demands but simply in terms of how that changes a body's circulation requirements. Sustained verticality makes very different demands on the body from sitting or lying down, or even small spurts of walking/standing. Is it possible to take mini breaks to put your feet up for a couple of minutes now and then?

Wonder if using the 'tea break' for a different liquid --- if eating so soon is unpalatable --- like a smoothie with lots of ice might help as well with both nutrition and hydration. I think when you lose your cups of tea/coffee, you lose your water intake from those as well as the caffeine. Something to keep in mind! Adding chocolate or matcha or coffee to said smoothie could help balance both fronts --- and it might be something you can sip as easily as water during the rest of your shift. Definitely, if not lunch, have easy glove-compartment snacks for the drive home too.

About the frozen meals being hard to heat up in time for dinner, what I used to do when I lived alone and didn't fancy cooking for one each night: make a bunch every few days, but freeze in small portions (enough for one, or in your case perhaps packs per 2-3 persons at a time). This way, if I popped it into the fridge the night before or in the morning, the small portion thaws enough to reheat on the stove or in the microwave pretty easily. You'd need smaller containers and more of them to get the same quantity to feed the whole family, of course; but divvying up does make both freezing and thawing/reheating way quicker.

Hope some of that helps!

I have no doubt you'll be on top of things again soon!

anne

Veteran

Just popping back to this thread partly to thank Manidipa - you always are able to write so much - I am in awe!
Some of my shifts I have been on my feet a fair bit, though that seems to be scaling back and now it is more like 1/2 the time, with some walking around the rest of the time.

I take a drink bottle with me all the time, so hydration isn't an issue ( I am a huge water drinker, as well as tea, and I think I heard somewhere recently that tea and caffiene are not as dehydrating as previously believed)

I remember when I was single doing the little frozen packs of one person meals! Once easter Saturday I made enough to last me until the end of June. Your suggestion would help, but I think I must have a not particularly strong microwave, and lots of things take a while. I have bought a slow cooker now, and plan to use it on the days I finish work at 5:30 since we'll want to eat ASAP ( on normal days we often eat at 5:30!) But freezing will continue to be part of how I function on normal SAHM afternoons.

To everyone - I am happy to report that things are getting much easier. I have tried taking dried fruit and hard boiled eggs as snacks and found that works well, but also I am adjusting to the routine. Also part of the ravenous hunger was a monthly cyclical issue, I now realise.

I forgot to mention that I only work 2.5 km from my home, so it is a very short drive, and I am thinking of starting to ride my bike there.

Ornella

(website)

Veteran

Oh Anne! This is great thread and full of useful advice. A few things that made my life easier when I had to juggle work and school and regular life, and key to them is planning and not having to think too much, but be on autopilot and save energy for the rest of the day.

- Plan your meals (family meals and snacks) as much in advance as possible - this will cut down shopping time, cooking time and general anxiety over making any preparations for meals on the days when you're working;

- Cook in bulks and freeze extra meals whenever you can; or dedicate one day a weekend just to fill up the freezer;

- Prepare everything the night before so your mornings are smooth - everyone's clothes, lunch boxes, other things that will need taking care of during the day. A few minutes in the evening spent on these activities will save you both time and sanity in the morning. When everything runs smoothly the whole day is different then when you start it with catching up and rushing.

- One thing that helped me was having the morning schedule written down and displayed in the kitchen. I might have not followed it to the minute, but I knew whether I was on track - again, this was to avoid rushing and worrying whether anyone is late;

- The food - I would avoid eating on the go / while driving. Maybe some snacking, like nuts, dried fruits, but nothing more serious than that... meals I prefer at the table.

- If you eat a lot of carbs, that definitely affects sugar levels, which is what might have resulted with a lot of coffee. Did you sweeten it? So, over-tiredness might be partially down to drastically reducing caffeine intake and processed sugar.

- I've just read your latest response - yes, by all means take the bike rather than drive a car. Easier commute has its many advantages

- By all means be easy on yourself, you deserve the rest with or without working outside home.