It's mean and unacceptable to talk like that to anyone, much less a child who is still so vulnerable, but I am still hesitant to judge because my parents are the same way.
In my case, I think it's mostly cultural. When my parents came here (to the US), my mom was 95 pounds and my dad was 120 pounds. They can't understand how at my age, not having had any kids, I can weigh nearly as much as my dad did then. It's especially annoying coming from my dad because he is just naturally thin. He can eat an entire bag of chocolates (and sometimes does) and not gain an ounce. He can't comprehend that not everyone has that good fortune.
My mom is nowhere near the 95 pounds she once was, but she always makes a point that she didn't gain any weight until after she had kids, so it has to just be something I'm doing wrong.
You all tell me how thin and dainty my arms are. Well, the other day I was downloading some old pictures off my camera, and my mom commented on how thin my arms once were. When I said they were still thin now, she disagreed. Honestly, I thought they looked about the same size, but she won't miss a chance to mourn how big I have become.
While all of this is annoying and clearly not helping my confidence, I know at the end of the day they are trying to help. My mom just doesn't want me to become like her. Both of my parents don't want me to end up like my brother, who is quite overweight. He, like me, used to be very skinny, but rapidly gained weight in his 20's. They're afraid I'm on that path.
So, like everyone else already said, just keep giving her positive vibes. It's all you can do. Parents do and say stupid things, but you might be able to undo a little bit of that.
